Disclaimer I'm not J. K. Rowling; the characters and setting do not belong to me. The plot belongs to a number of different people who are also not me. I also don't own the song "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds," or the slogan, "Ace, the helpful place." The Beatles and Ace Hardware Store do, respectively.

Summary One Shot. I think the title is pretty self explanatory. If you have no idea what Mow is, you'll find out soon enough. Features a cliched American exchange student, and a ever so slightly out of character Harry.

A/N There's nothing deep here, folks, just fun stuff. It's just a wacky little idea I thought of when I woke up this morning trying to think up ideas for an activity for FHE. If you don't know what that is, don't worry about it; it's not important to the story.

Harry Potter and Friends Play Mow

Harry, Ron, and a cliched American exchange student were sitting in the Gryffindor common room, enjoying their Christmas holidays, despite the snow storm blowing up outside the window. Forgetting their worries, and being normal teenagers for once, they were playing a card game They each had a hand of five cards, and the rest of the deck was in a single stack in the center of the coffee table that sat between them. Harry appeared to be concentrating very hard.

"Alright, I'm ready." Harry told his friends, and he flipped over the top card. It showed the queen of diamonds.

Wordlessly, Harry indicated to Ron, who was sitting to his left, that he should start.

Ron played the queen of spades. "Spades," he said, and play continued:

Queen of hearts,

Ace of hearts.

Eight of hearts. Before laying down her card, the cliched American exchange student paused and stared pointedly at Harry. "Ahem," she said. Harry stared at her for a moment, and then, remembering, gave Ron a card.

"Oh yeah," said Ron, without preamble. Harry handed him another card. Ron hit himself in the forehead with the palm of his hand, and play resumed:

Five of hearts,

Jack of hearts,

Four of hearts.

The cliched American exchange student drew a card instead of playing one.

King of hearts,

Seven of hearts,

Seven of diamonds. Harry handed the cliched American exchange student a card, and laying down the four of diamonds, said "Lucy in the Sky." The cliched American exchange student blinked, but she excepted the card without complaint.

Ron laid down the six of diamonds without saying anything, and Harry handed him another card. The cliched American exchange student shook her head at Ron and laid down the three of diamonds, saying, "Lucy in the Sky, and, Larry, Moe, and Curly."

Harry played the ten of diamonds, said, "Lucy in the Sky" again, and Ron followed suit with the nine. "Lucy in the Sky?" he added, a bit unsure. The cliched American exchange student continued the play:

Ace of diamonds, ("Lucy in the Sky.")

Two of diamonds, ("Lucy in the Sky.")

Eight of diamonds, ("Lucy in the Sky, and Eight's.")

Eight of clubs. ("Eight's.")

It went on like this for awhile, until Harry declared himself victor by laying down the last of his cards, sighing contentedly, and sitting back in his chair with a smug look on his face.

"Alright, Master Mow," the cliched American exchange student said sarcastically, reacting rather poorly to Harry's show. "Any more bright ideas?"

"Hmm, " said Harry, thinking. "Give me a minute." He took his minute, or two, or five, while Ron and the cliched American exchange student talked about nothing in particular, which was mostly just about how very long Harry was taking.

At one point, Ron suggested, "You know what would make this game even more fun?"

"No, I don't know."

"Playing it with Exploding Snap cards."

"Hmm, I don't know if that would work. Exploding Snap cards have different suits and value notations. Some of the rules wouldn't apply."

"We could change the rules. You said so yourself there are different versions."

"True."

"Alright, I got one," Harry told them, interrupting their revelry.

"It's about time!" they said together, and the three started another round.

A minute or so later, Hermione, who had apparently gotten tired of studying in the library alone, walked through the portrait-hole. Seeing them, she walked over to find out what they were doing. After a minute during which none of them seemed to want to say anything, she asked them, "What are you doing, anyway?"

"P/A, we're playing Mow." the cliched American exchange student informed her, not taking her attention off the game.

"What is that, exactly?"

"P/A, It's a game I learned back home. You know, in America. Actually, it was named after an evil fascist dictator."

"Oh," Hermione said, more confused than before. After a few seconds consideration, she asked, "How do you play?"

Sighing, the cliched American exchange student set her cards, except for one, face down on the table before her and faced Hermione. "I can't tell you." She then played the Ace of spades adding the statement "Ace, the helpful place, and spades." Harry and Ron might have spoken up at this point, but the cliched American exchange student seemed to be handling it.

"What?"

"I can't tell you. It's against the rules to actually explain any of them except that one."

"Since when have you cared about rules?"

"Since the rules in question were rules of a card game I enjoy playing."

"How'd Harry and Ron learn to play, then?

"We played a couple of rounds."

"Oh. Well then, it must not be all that difficult?" Harry and Ron glared at her, which she ignored, but the cliched American exchange student merely shrugged in answer. "May I watch?" Hermione asked surreptitiously.

"Certainly!" the cliched American exchange student told her, and turned back to the game, only to find a pile of additional cards lying next to her hand on the table top. She stared at them for a few seconds, then said, in a tone that did nothing to hide her annoyance, "P/A, Oh come on! I was talking to Hermione." Harry handed her another card.

"What's this one for?", she asked in the same tone.

Harry handed her another card. "P/A, you didn't say P/A."

"P/A, the one before the last one, then."

"P/A, talking back to the Mow and delay of game. End P/A."

"P/A, you're thoroughly enjoying this, aren't you?" She said, in a subdued voice.

"P/A, yes. End P/A." he said and handed her another card.

A/N again Like it? Hate it? I don't care, just tell me that you read it.

If you haven't figured out all the rules, reread it. They're all in there somewhere. Feel free to "teach" this game to all your friends and family, just remember the one rule. You CAN'T tell them the rules; they have to learn it by playing it themselves or watch (or read about) someone else playing it. Good luck to you!