A/N: Wow, I'm so confused. And now I'm going to get a lot of people confused. Though, if I'm confused doesn't nessisarily mean that you will be confused. On account that I get confused a helluva lot. That makes me giddy inside.

KT: NO! If you die, who wilt send me random e-mails about the worship of the Almighty One?!

Wilfiredrems: Yours too? Vincent... All answers will be revealed if you read this chapter! God, all the peoples constantly asking the questions!

Labrat-seph: )blinking a lot( Oooooookay... let's go with that and the 'I hope to Sephiroth that she doesn't send her army after me' thing... OR... I can call up my army of walking pop-tarts to protect me... But... I'll just go with a Zack-like Meep.

Minako: MORE QUESTIONS?!?!?!?! GOD! It's like a freakin' virus... okay... )takes deep breath( I wilt tell you that you must read the chapter and you want to make me pull all of my hair out. Happy?

Pero pero: How alike they are is what makes me pummel them so... except for Vincent and Auron... )smirks( they're actually cool!

Kikyos killer: I'm writing more stupidity! Hold on damnit!

Chapter name: Conversations from the living to the dead

Rating: PG-13 Why? 'Cause of mild swearing, blood, sexual themes, slight drinking, and violence

Story Summery: Sephiroth is flung into Spira and meets with the ex-summoner and her guardians.

Chapter summary: More talking with the farplane peoples, plus the new look of Jenova

Pairings: Tidus x Yuna, Wakka x Lulu, possible Seph x Lulu or Seph x Rikku (Don't send me flames! I said possible, and if you like the characters that are them, say that my writing is preposterous in a review!)

Disclaimer: I do not own the Final Fantasy series or anything embedded within the game. Nor do I own Twix, I just slightly altered the name. Yojimbo'sblade owns the idea of the idea of a Sephiroth x Lulu(don't get mad at him, 'cause I actually used his idea, though it would be rather funny to see them). .

Warnings: An appearance by someone and lot's o' utter randomness!

Another A/N: Sorry for the lack of updating... )sweat drop( I have been getting writer's block on this, and now must ram my head into the keyboard in order to think of any ideas... it doesn't really work. Heh, it's been about a month since I've worked on this... and now I'm finally writing. Wow, that's amazing.

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Jenova appeared, fully clothed and full bodied. But... she wore a pink dress. The group of people stared in distugst at her.

"Um... why are you wearing pink Mother?" Jenova looked at him, and blinked for a bit. Hojo walked over to the blue-skinned demon and poked her breast.

"You are wonderful..." Jenova twitched slightly, then picked Hojo up and threw him off the platform of the farplane.

"So you're Sephy's mommy..." Rikku said, walking up to Jenova, her blonde hair bouncing up and down. "Nice to meet you." Rikku held out her hand to the woman. "I like your outfit." she complimented happily. Jenova smiled happily and took the Al Bhed girl's hand.

"Thank you." she said preppily. The Final Fantasy VII cast stared in awe.

"MOTHER! You sound... you sound..." Sephiroth couldn't find the words to describe it.... other than a certain personage...

"Like me!" Aeris popped out of nowhere and stood beside Jenova. Cloud opened his mouth, and then closed it, opened it again. And then closed it once again. He then jumped up and lunged at Aeris, only to meet a metal rod.

"Oww..." he said, falling down the Princess Guard.

"As you can see..." the flower-girl said as she pulled the rod towards her. "Jenova has taught me a few things." she motioned to the large figure beside her... which was Kihmari. Aeris blinked a moment. "Where's Jenova?" Aeris twirled around madly searching for the demon.

"I'm right here girlfriend!" Jenova cried as she happily skipped over to the group. "And I like brought a friend!" Sephiroth let his jaw drop, as did Vincent. For there stood Lucrecia. "This is like Lucrecia. Like, remember... like?" Aeris nodded her head.

"I like totally do!" the three girls flung themselves into a conversation about boys, why I do not know. But, Yuna, Rikku, Yuffie, Scarlet and Tifa joined them.

"Any idea what their talkin' 'bout?" Zack asked Lulu, who was standing right in front of him. She shook her head. "Oookay..." he looked over to them. "Man, I just want to throw my Buster Sword over there and see how they react!" he flung his head toward the ground and blacked out.

"..." Red stared at Kihmari for a while, and then looked over to Sephiroth... who was talking to his fellow AVALANCHE member, Vincent.

"We're power-less against them, aren't we?" Sephiroth nodded his head numbly.

"I've never heard her actually speak before, it was only an echoing distant cry." Sephiroth said softly. "I didn't think that she was a.... a... a..." of course, he didn't know what to call her. Since he was never good at street talk.

"A prep!" Reno had somehow magically appeared and was standing beside Sephiroth. The two stared blankly at him. He shrugged. "What?"

"Don't interfere with our conversation." Vincent said threateningly. Reno edged away slightly, and then ran over and hid behind Zack's unconscious body.

"What do we do now?" Sephiroth said, motioning to the sleeping bodies around him.

"Why are they sleeping?" Vincent asked, quirking an eyebrow underneath his bandana.

"I don't know..." everyone around them was asleep, except for Lulu. "It is rather strange though..." suddenly, a bright light appeared and a women with long flowing hair appeared.

"Lady Yunaleska!" Lulu cried. Sephiroth and Vincent exchanged confused glances. The women reached out to them.

"Come to me..." she said in a low voice. Sephiroth and Vincent stared blankly. "Come..." she outstretched her arms.

"Why?" Vincent asked. She stopped fluying towards them and pointed accusingly.

"Look! Do you want me to help you or not?!" Vincent blinked as she continued to fly over. She grabbed each of their hands and pulled them... but found them to be surprisingly heavy. "Move damnit!" She cried, trying to fly away with them. Sephiroth pulled out his Masamune as Vincent pulled out his Death Penalty.

Seph-"Lulu fell to the floor before she could finish. They attack the woman, and she slumped to the floor.

"Is she supposed to be dead?" Vincent shrugged. They each picked up a handful of popcorn and munched happily.

A/N: Yes, next chappie is da epilogue. So, this is my longest running fic... and it's going to end with more stupid-ness. I'm so glad that all you personages have been waiting for my updates, no matter how crappy... and short. Oh, yeah. The joke!

We join the Turks, Sephiroth, and Zack, all sitting in the SOLDIER first's apartment.

Zack: What's the richest kind of air?

Elena: )jumps up nad down( PERFUME!

Reno: )scoots slightly away, bumps Tseng(

Tseng: Umm...

Rude: ...

Sephy: ...

Zack: Ookay... How about... What sea creature is always grumpy?

Reno and Elena: Umm... I don't know?

Tseng and Rude: ...

Sephy: The Emerald WEAPON.

Everyone except Sephy: )giant eyebrow quirk(

Sephy: )shrug(

Reno: I know! It was Sephiroth!

Sephy: )glares at Reno(

Zack: My god! It was a crab damnit! Is it that hard to figure it out?!

Everyone except Zack and Sephy: )shuffle nervously(

A/N: I must thank everyone who has waited for all of my updates, no matter how bad and short they were. If you don't review, I probably won't even bother with a epilogue... so... review, lest this becomes the permanent last chappie in this fic. Well, review please!