Chapter 34

Buffy stretched out the crick in her neck as she made her way to the shower. She hadn't slept well at all last night, and Spike's weird behaviour wasn't helping her mood. He'd spent most of the previous day in a strange sulk and then it'd just gone down hill after their 'argument that wasn't an argument'. She just didn't know what to think, except that she knew that neither of them had slept particularly well and Spike had seemed to wake in as bad of a mood as he'd gone to bed with, and disappeared off early. She sighed as she entered the bathroom, hoping that a hot shower would ease off the worst of her muscle aches.

Spike slouched sullenly against the worktop in the kitchen as Buffy entered carrying her heavy bag. He took a deep breath and avoided her eyes, determinedly maintaining his air of being pissed off and knowing that if he looked at her it would just crumble and he would once more be lost to her every whim.

Buffy nodded slightly to herself as she noted Spike's actions and moved the shoulder strap on her bag to a more comfortable position.

"Are you sure you won't stay for lunch before you go?" Jenny asked hopefully.

"I'm sure - it's a long drive back and I really should be going," Buffy replied, looking over at Spike, who looked away once more, before shaking his head and walking out of the room. Jenny frowned at the action before turning towards Buffy once more.

"Have you two had some sort of a fight?" she asked, her tone revealing her genuine concern. Buffy shrugged.

"I don't know. I don't think so," she replied.

"I guess he just doesn't want you to go. Yes, I bet that's it," Jenny declared, clearly happy with the explanation she'd come up with. "It must be hard for you, living so far away from each other," she sympathised.

"Er, well, yeah," Buffy hedged, not feeling particularly comfortable lying to Spike's mother.

"But you'll make it work, I just know it," Jenny said happily. "You know, I don't think I've ever seen my son so much in love. And you're such a lovely girl. Even Rupert likes you, and he's famous for loathing every girl that William brings home."

Buffy's eyes bulged at Jenny's speech and she simply stood there, unsure of how to react to what she'd just been told.

"Well, if you really have to go..." Jenny finished and Buffy dragged her mind back to the here and now, wondering if she'd missed any of what Jenny had been saying.

"Yes, yes. Really have to, er, go. Go, right, yes. That's what I have to do. Bags all packed and everything, so going. Me, now. Er, bye. Right. Bye," she babbled, aware that Jenny was looking at her as though she'd gone slightly mad.

Eventually, she made it out to the car and she sat there for a minute or two staring blankly at the steering wheel, Jenny's words repeating themselves in her head.

"...I don't think I've ever seen my son so much in love..."

"...my son so much in love..."

"...in love..."

Eventually, she looked up at her reflection in the rear-view mirror. "Huh?"

---------------------------

Spike lay on his bed and stared up at the ceiling, wondering where it had all gone wrong.

He'd always thought that he was fine with the deal that he and Buffy had about their non-relationship. But yesterday had been, well, he wasn't exactly sure what it had been, but her latest rejection had left him feeling empty.

Not as if the chit ever promised me anything, he thought to himself as he traced a crack which had appeared in the ceiling just lately. 'Just the opposite, in fact. Been right up front with me about things and can't ask fairer than that now, can I? No, I've got absolutely no cause for complaint.' he decided to himself.

"Then why am I so bloody well pissed off with her?" he asked out loud as he rolled over and buried him face in the pillow.

He inhaled deeply and found himself beginning to smile. He frowned and inhaled again, registering this time what it was that was making him smile.

The pillow smelt of her, of roses and vanilla and the perfume that she wore. He nestled his cheek against the pillow and sighed, wondering what he was going to do now. His eyes slowly drifted closed as the sleep that he hadn't really managed to get last night threatened to over come him.

The soft knock at the door jolted him awake and he blearily sat up as his mother walked into the room.

"Oh, hi mum. What is it?" he asked.

"Buffy's leaving - aren't you going to go and say goodbye?" she responded, leaning against the doorpost.

"What? She's going already?" he asked, jumping to his feet and heading quickly towards the door.

"You were there when she was saying goodbye, remember?" Jenny called after him as he headed downstairs.

He found Buffy sat in the car, not showing any signs of moving, obviously lost in thought. He made his way round to the passenger side and opened the door, starling her as he sat down.

"Buffy..." he started.

"Spike. I, well, that is..." she babbled. He frowned at her slightly and she stopped, a sheepish smile on her face. He took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry. I've been behaving like an idiot and with no reason," he said to her earnestly. "Please, forgive me?" he asked, hopefully.

"Oh, well, yes, of course. It's no biggy, really. It's fine. I, well, I really have to, y'know, go. Yep, that's right, go. Long drive, have to get on the road." A look of almost panic seemed to flit across her features as she realised that she was, yet again, yammering on for no apparent reason. She consciously stopped herself and smiled at him.

"Right..." Spike said, somewhat bemused by her outburst. "Anyway, I'll see you next weekend then?" he asked. Buffy looked at him, managing to do a perfect impression of a startled rabbit.

"Next weekend?" she asked slowly.

"Yeah, you know - the Christmas party..."

"Oh, right, yeah, that..." she said hesitantly, trying to work out whether seeing him again now that she knew what she knew was a good idea and whether it would change their relationship.

"Don't tell me you're not coming! You have to come! Don't make me go there on my own..." Spike pleaded and Buffy realised that she had no choice - at the end of the day, he was still one of her best friends and she just couldn't abandon him.

"No, of course I'll be there, I was just... I was just wondering what I was going to wear, that's all," she explained.

"Okay, so I'll meet you at the hotel next Saturday - you have the directions, right?"

"Yes, Spike - I have the directions! Now, I really have to get going!" she exclaimed.

"'K. Bye then - drive safely," he said and leaned in for a kiss. Buffy watched him lean in and turned her head to the side at the last minute so the kiss landed firmly on her cheek.

Spike got out of the car and watched her drive off, a concerned frown on his face.

There was definitely something wrong, he just couldn't work out exactly what it was.