Author's Notes: Okay, I just decided that currently SUCKS for not posting my update. I'm mad at them, and so I intend to bomb them with rubber chickens and beat their servers with steel chairs in my next life. Unless, of course, they do this chapter right—then all is forgiven. Now, reviews (what few I had, stupid )
MortalSora: Why, thank you! While I admit, I did put more effort into that last chapter than I did in most of the others, finding all the roles wasn't as hard as you'd think. Thankfully, The Internet Movie Database ) lists not only movies, but also TV series, made-for-TV movies, and video games, as well as everyone involved with their production. This includes a database for all the actors that they know of and, holy crap, Michael Bell has been there, done that, and brought back a shirt to prove it. I was shocked to discover how many of my favorite and my friends' favorite shows and whatnot he'd been in, or at least his voice (well, usually his voice). They also have a nice little "memorable quotes" section for some entries, which is where all the quotes for other voices came from. You should look it up sometime, as well as other LOK actors—you'd be amazed at what else you've seen or heard them in, and didn't know it.
Killer Doll Prototype 5: Yeah, well, having such a well-known voice actor obviously has its downfalls... :-P
And now, new and improved with a minty freshness, it's none other than....
Why Video Game Characters Aren't Allowed to Add-Lib 9Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain: Kain and Mortanius
Vae Victus - suffering to the conquered. Ironic that now I was the one suffering. Not anything as pedestrian as physical pain. Rather the cruel jab of impotent anger - the hunger for revenge.
Kain awoke, bound by the hands to poles that forced him to stand; rather he wanted to or not. He and the poles were standing on a ledge over looking a pool of fire and lava. He was vaguely aware of pain in his chest, and looked down to see the point of a sword protruding from his chest and through his armor. He had also a vague memory of the town of Ziegstruhl, of a being refused a drink at the tavern and being greeted at the door by bandits. He remembered the ambush, and fighting well, giving out his trademark call of "Vae Victus!" as each one fell. But he was out-matched, and soon, their numbers overwhelmed him. He remembered being disarmed, becoming disoriented. The sound as one of them cried "End it now!" And then, pain, blood and...
Suddenly, all became clear. He, Kain, nobleman of Coorhagen, had been murdered, and now rested in what must be the very bowels of Hell.
Kain looked about now with a clearer understanding of his situation, and thought.
I didn't care if I was in Heaven or Hell - all I wanted was to kill my assassins. Sometimes you get what you wish for. The Necromancer Mortanius offered me a chance for vengeance. And like a fool, I jumped at his offer without considering the cost.
Was that true? His still scattered brain reconsidered his own thoughts, and upon seeing the corpse-like figure in the black robe from the corner of his eye, he knew that it had to have been. This figure, this Mortanius, had indeed made him an offer...an offer his disgruntled and vengeful soul was unable to refuse. To return as a creature of the night...to avenge his own death and take the blood of his enemies for his own...it seemed to good to be true.
Nothing is free.
Not even revenge.
Kain felt Mortanius grip the hilt of the sword sticking out of his back.
"You will have the blood you hunger for," he promised the spirit. Mortanius then strengthened his grip on the sword, and gave a mighty pull on it, an act that, as soon as done, would transform Kain from the handsome, brunet nobleman of his life, to the grotesque, pale skinned and white haired vampire of his unlife...
The only problem with that, however, was that the sword was stuck.
Mortanius glanced about, a bit embarrassed, and then gave the sword another, somewhat harder tug. The result was much the same as before: the sword remained planted in Kain's back. Mortanius grumbled and tried again, this time pulling hard enough to make Kain grunt.
"What in the hell are you doing back there?!" Kain snapped, trying to look over his shoulder at the Necromancer. "Just pull the damn thing out already!"
"I'm trying!" Mortanius growled back, "But I can't! It's stuck!"
"WHAT?!" Kain's eyes widened. "Stuck?! How in the hell can that thing be stuck??"
"Do I look like a blacksmith to you?" Mortanius grumbled, obviously irritated. He looked at the sword hilt for a moment, and then rolled up the sleeves on his shirt. "Brace yourself, I'm going to try again."
"Knock yourself out," Kain grunted, but he planted his feet in the dirt just the same.
Mortanius grabbed the hilt again, braced one leg up against the left pole Kain was tied to, planted the other leg firmly to the ground, and then pulled with all of his might against the sword. Kain braced himself, and also pulled, to the best of his ability. But the sword never gave, and at length Mortanius' hands slipped and he fell backwards onto his bum, which he met with a loud curse. Kain was thrown forward as well, but his constraints didn't allow him to go far.
"That hurt," Mortanius grumbled as he got back up and dusted himself off. "I'm afraid it's wedged in there too tight for me to budge, Kain..."
"Well, great!" Kain exclaimed, "Just wonderful! What idiot did that, anyway? I swear, I'll make that assassin's end very slow and painful for this." He sighed. "So now what?"
The Necromancer continued to brush himself off as he circled around to Kain's front so that they could look each other in the face. "Not sure," he said, thoughtfully, "But I'm working on it..."
"Well, hurry up," Kain said impatiently, "We have the entire game to do yet...this is just the prologue..."
"I know, I know, just give me a minute," Mortanius said. He looked out over the fiery pool as he thought. At length, he reached into his cloak and withdrew a cell phone. "I think I need to make a few calls..."
Kain blinked. "Calls?" Kain said, amazed, "You mean you can get reception down here?"
"Oh, sure," Mortanius shrugged, "But the plan's terrible...Luckily, I have unlimited Guardian-to-Guardian minutes. Good thing, too—since Nupraptor went crazy, there's really no other way to get in touch with the others."
"You're a Guardian??" Kain said, awed.
"Well, yeah," Mortanius said, "I thought you knew that...It's all in the script." Mortanius considered. "You have read the script, haven't you?"
"Of course I have!" Kain said defensively, then, after glancing around, added as an after note, "Sort of..."
Mortanius groaned and begin dialing a number. "Never mind," he muttered, then held the phone up to his ear. Kain, intrigued, listened in.
The Necromancer stood still and silent for a few moments, then sat up and began to talk. "Bane?" he said, "Yeah, this is Mortanius...Listen, do you have anymore of that weird grease you and Anarcrothe made?" A pause. "Yes, the one with the whale blubber in it." Another pause. "He's got it, does he? Hmm...Well, are you at Dark—What? Hello? I can't hear you! Bane? Bane, are you standing next to DeJoule? Bane, move away from her! Move away from DeJoule!" He sighed, and glanced at Kain. "Her energy field messes ups his reception..."
"Ah," Kain said with a nod, as though all were explained.
"Yeah...Hold on. Bane?" Mortanius' attention was back on the phone. "Did you move? You need to stop doing that when you're on the phone...Yeah, about that grease, you said Anarcrothe's got it. Is he there at Dark Eden? Yeah? Could you tell him to drop some of that off with Azimuth and tell her to bring it to me? She knows where I am." There was another pause. "Well, you remember what we're doing today, right? Starting to film 'Blood Omen'? You know how I'm supposed to change him? Well, the damn's sword's stuck." A loud noise came over the line, and Kain thought he saw Mortanius smirk. "No, I kid you not, I can't budge it for anything. I wanted to try the grease and see it that helped." Another pause. "Call Malek to get it? No way, Bane...He's still pretty sore about that whole 'pleasures of the flesh' thing; I'd rather not use him if I had a choice. Thanks though. I'll call Az and give her a head's up. Take care, Bane." Mortanius pressed a button on the phone, and nodded to Kain. "See? We'll have it out in no time, you'll see."
"Oh, I feel so much better," said Kain in a flat tone that said exactly opposite.
Mortanius made another call, this time to Lady Azimuth the Planar, the Guardian of Dimension and Matriarch of Avernus, convincing her to bring the grease to them. There was a bit of an argument, Azimuth apparently wanting to send a demon in her stead. At length, however, she gave in to coming herself, and Mortanius thanked her and hung up.
"Do you really think this will work?" Kain asked curiously as he watched the Necromancer out the cell phone away.
Mortanius shrugged. "Can't hurt," he said truthfully, "Worse comes to worse, you'll make good frying covered in animal grease."
Kain rolled his eyes. "Aren't you funny," he muttered.
Mortanius looked at Kain with one eyebrow raised. "I was joking?" he asked, "Hmm, news to me." Kain's eyes bulged, and he was in the process of asking a question when Azimuth walked up from behind them.
"I swear, Mort, you really owe me for this one," she grumbled, "My babies were having such a good time burning down the city...and you're making me miss it!"
"Oh, don't be such a cry baby, Az," Mortanius said, "They'll still be burning it down when you get back...Oh, where are my manners? Azimuth, this is Kain. Kain, this is Lady Azimuth."
"Greetings," Kain said politely, nodding in greeting between the two poles the bound him.
"How do you do," Azimuth returned with a nod of her own, and then handed a jar of yellow sludge to Mortanius. "Here it is...just showed up with Malek, Anarcrothe did, right there in the middle of my Cathedral! Can you believe that??"
Mortanius took the jar and glanced at it, then groaned and held his stomach. Azimuth looked at him. "Are you alright?" she asked.
Mortanius nodded and released his hold on his stomach. When he did, Kain could have sworn he saw a flicker of green in Mortanius' eyes. It was brief, but it was there...and it made Kain curious. "Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks, Az, you're a life saver," he said.
"Stop calling me Az!" Azimuth snapped, then sighed and rubbed her baldhead. "Whatever...I have a autocracy to demolish, and Turel needs feeding." With that, she stormed off the ledge the way she came, leaving Kain wondering what a Turel was.
Mortanius looked at the grease, then looked at Kain. "Well, shall we?"
"Yeah," Kain agreed, "My arms are starting to go to cramp."
Mortanius began to rub the grease all over the blade, at least everywhere that seemed to relate to removing it from Kain. After about a third of the jar had been used, Mortanius wiped his hands on his legs and got behind Kain.
"Ready??" he called.
Kain braced himself. "Ready!"
"Go!" And they began to pull again. This time, the blade dislodged slightly and moved about a quarter of an inch. Kain grinned in excitement.
"It's working!" he exclaimed, "Keep pulling!" But, instead, the pressure from Mortanius suddenly stopped. Kain blinked, tried to look over his shoulder, and couldn't see anything. "Hey, Mortanius? What did you quit for?"
"Well," came the voice of the Necromancer, only it was somehow...changed. "I thought about it.... and decided that this was far to good an opportunity to pass up."
Mortanius came around so that Kain could see him, only it wasn't Mortanius anymore—the new addition of the flaming green eyes was enough to give that away. Whoever it was, it was now in control, and had a very sickly looking grin on its face. The kind of grin, Kain thought, a wolf would give an injured sheep.
Now Kain, at this point, was only a spirit if a murdered nobleman from Coorhagen who for some reason or another had left home to go adventuring. He was not a dark vampire of the night, not a fearless eater of blood, not a brave slayer of Guardians. He had never led a campaign to take over the world with vampires, had never wielded a sword called the Soul Reaver, had never met a woman named Umah. As a matter of fact, he had also never battled the reformed Sarafan warriors, never heard of the Hylden of the Ancients, never resurrected six of the original Sarafan warriors as his vampiric sons and lieutenants, and so he sure as hell had never had the oldest one of them thrown into a giant whirlpool for growing wings and being a key part of his master plan. In fact, poor Kain had not even the tiniest inkling he would go on from this place and do most of those things, and with his mortal state-of-mind still in tact, he wasn't even sure he was going to get out now that he was faced with this...thing. And so, he did what any normal, everyday Nosgothic noble would have done in that situation.
He screamed like a girl and wet himself.
Mortanius, now speaking as the Unspoken, laughed. "Aww, does poor ickle Kainy want his Mommy? Well, don't worry, little fool...When I'm done with you, they'll need to animate a whole new one just to put the game back on track." Kain gave a tiny, terrified whimper. "And I promise, it will hurt, Scion—it'll hurt quite a bit."