Author's Note: Just to remind readers… in WondergirlRobin was going on seventeen, but time has lapsed since then, so he is seventeen now, going on eighteen. I've been thinking about Starfire's personality in the series and it occurred to me that she's almost perfect. She has her insecurities, yes, but she's beautiful and smart and kind, so she could get rather one dimensional if she goes on like that forever. So maybe this little accident of hers would be a good thing, right? At least, that's what I want to happen.

Standard disclaimers apply.

CHAPTER EDITED NOV. 24, 2004: Due thanks to Aria-Angel. More edits forth-coming. Of course, your insight is still most welcome. :)

GUIDING STAR

Chapter Two - Helpless

"What is—why is this--?"

He didn't know how he found the voice to speak, but he did. "Just—Just try to calm down." He didn't know how she was going to do it under the circumstances, but it was the best thing he could say to her right now. He was completely at a loss.

"I…" Her voice trailed and he saw her brows knitting. Her grip on his hand tightened and her lips tensed, the smile completely gone. The rhythm of her heart began to gain speed, registering as high-pitched beats on the electrocardiograph. "Richard!"

There was a high-pitched, panicked timbre to her tone, and it struck him—hard. He was supposed to be her leader. He was supposed to be prepared for anything, but now, he hadn't the slightest clue of what to do.

He heard a familiar voice coming from outside and knew that Raven was coming with the nurse.

Not now. Not yet.

He had to go to the door. He had to tell Raven that Starfire needed more time, and perhaps the nurse could take a look at her later, but Starfire's grip hardened like iron and he didn't have the heart to leave her alone now.

Her brow furrowed, "Robin," she said, her lower lip shaking. The beats of her heart reached a strobe-like crescendo. "I… I think I am damaged. Robin, I… I think I am blind."

Nothing but the sound of the EKG pervaded the room.

She had said it and finally, reality bit a shark.

There was a shuffle of cloth and Robin realized that Raven was standing at the door, for once at a loss for words.

It felt as if that horrible moment had stretched for a lifetime, but it couldn't have been more than a few seconds.

The nurse certainly didn't look shocked. With complete command of her faculties, the nurse promptly informed them that she would call the doctor. She said she would be back shortly with Starfire's attending physician, Doctor Peii.

It was likely none of them really heard her.

Raven stepped into the room. "Starfire."

Starfire's head swerved, turning way past Raven. It pained Robin to see Starfire like that and no doubt it affected Raven as well because she went to Starfire and took her hand.

It was strange, both of them holding Starfire's hands.

Robin realized that as a team of superheroes, they all tended to be strong, and tough. While holding hands was okay when all was well, it seemed alien to hold a teammate's hand for actual support. There was no real need for a shoulder to cry on in the Titan Tower because no one really cried. Even in the worse of times, the Titans resolved issues with a pat on the shoulder, or a shrug, or sometimes yelling and maybe even a brawl or two, but never crying.

So as they held her, neither of them knew what to do. The irony of it was incredible; that it had to be the two most dispassionate members of the team who had to deal with perhaps the most passionate of the Titans.

She didn't cry, but her breath quivered, and she looked like she was going to burst any second. Raven's hands glowed ever so slightly, and with it, Starfire's heartbeat stabilized. Robin could only assume Raven was using her powers to calm Starfire down. He was glad that at least one of them knew what to do.

Starfire sniffed, tears beginning to collect in her eyes. He didn't want to see Starfire crying; it was too painful. He should embrace her, really. His mother used to do that when he cried as a little kid; surely Starfire would appreciate that kind of support, but then it was awkward now, with the cumbersome hospital bed and the tangling tubes.

He saw tissue, and however lame he knew it would be, he took the box and put it beside her on the bed. He led her hand to the ply sticking out of the box and almost reluctantly released his hold on her.

Starfire took a tissue and pre-empted the fall of her tears. "I—" She took deep breaths to compose herself and steady her speech. "I should not despair, yet. My condition could be temporary? I may recover my eyesight. It is completely possible."

For a moment, her words actually made him feel better and one look at Raven showed that Starfire had the same effect on her.

They were a couple of idiots, Raven and he. Shouldn't they be the ones trying to comfort Starfire?

"It is possible," said Robin. He expelled a deep breath and run a hand through his hair. There was still hope, wasn't there?

But what if there wasn't?

That possibility couldn't be discounted.

A lead weight dropped in his stomach and Robin seriously believed he was going to be sick.

Raven looked grave. She released Starfire's hand and went to the corner of the room, near the window. Robin thought she was going to meditate, but she didn't. She merely sat and took measured breaths.

Somehow, Starfire recovered her signature smile, though she still trembled slightly. "Did we kick the butt of Cinderblock?"

Robin nodded wearily, fighting back his own feelings of grief and shock, at least for the meantime. "Yes, we did. Actually, there's hardly anything of him left."

"He's dead." Raven couldn't have gotten any blunter than that.

Starfire gasped. "Did I…?"

"No," Raven said. "I did. Blew him to bits. You know how I get."

Robin watched Raven's expression. There was nothing to suggest how she felt about blowing up Cinderblock. Even if the guy was made of pure concrete, there had to be something humanoid about him. It was like that eighties movie Beast Boy rented called Short Circuit. The robot, No. 5, was just really a robot that got short circuited into gaining human attributes. He was just a pile of tin and circuits, but as they watched the cheap effects and heard the cheesy lines, they rooted for No. 5. They didn't want No. 5 turned off.

Granted, Cinderblock was no lovable No. 5, there was something living about him that none of them could deny. So how was Raven taking it? Did she feel like she had actually killed someone?

It was evident enough that Starfire hadn't liked the idea that she may have been responsible for Cinderblock's death, but that was expected of her.

There was a commotion in the hallway and Robin could hear Beast Boy's familiar laughter echoing as they got nearer.

Cyborg and Beast Boy appeared at the door with a box of pizza.

Beast Boy's grin widened. "You're awake! About time!"

Cyborg, holding the box, cocked a smile. "You hungry? We got pizza."

Starfire shook her head.

Beast Boy perched on the edge of the bed at Starfire's feet. "Robin, you so missed half of your life by not having lunch with us. Cyborg was going through pizza slices like there was no tomorrow! And then at one point, Cyborg pretended he was going to throw up and Pizza Hut looked like they were finally going to be rid of him, but then Cyborg was just messing around and he went on eating. It was like—psyche! Man, they had to throw Cyborg out, or they'd have gone out of business!"

Cyborg grinned. "Twenty one slices. Booyah! Am I sick or what!"

Robin nodded, distracted. "Yeah."

"You must be." It was nice to hear Raven's sardonic tone.

Starfire giggled softly. "In my planet, contests such as those were held. The one who ate the most cups of boogerworms won."

Beast Boy collapsed in laughter. "Boo-ger!"

Cyborg's lips curled. "Now that's sick, yo. I mean, lit'rally."

Robin felt his headache suddenly getting worse and he could only imagine how Starfire felt with all the noise. He knew Cyborg and Beast Boy were just glad Starfire was awake, but they couldn't even tell something was wrong. He was just about to tell them to shut up when Beast Boy suddenly stopped laughing and gave Starfire a curious stare.

Cyborg arched an eyebrow, noticing Beast Boy's strange behavior. "What?"

Beast Boy inched a bit closer to Starfire. "Star?"

She raised an inquiring eyebrow at him, her weary gaze looking past him.

Beast Boy's eyes widened. "Star… what--? What's Cinderblock done to you?"

She smiled wanly. "Well, I seemed to have suffered some kind of visual impairment…"

Beast Boy swallowed. He was familiar with Starfire's speech patterns. That and the vacant look in her eyes told him all he needed to know. He knew what she meant. "Nothing at all, Star? Couldn't you… couldn't you at least…?"

"No. There is nothing."

Cyborg frowned and shot Robin a glare. For a moment, Robin thought Cyborg was going to blame him, and he would take it, because the guilt had been there for days, but Cyborg merely said, "What have the doctors said?"

"We're still waiting for the doctor to come over and examine her."

Beast Boy slumped in his seat and gave one of his pitiful wails. He promptly transformed into a cat and curled up on Starfire's lap, whipping his fluffy green tail.

Starfire cooed delightedly as she felt the dowdy fur on her arm, petting Beast Boy from head to spine and scratching him delicately behind the ears.

Raven frowned. "Is that even sanitary?"

Robin was actually glad of Beast Boy's sensibilities. The shape-changer hated being treated like a pet because really, he wasn't one, but he did it for Starfire, and Robin appreciated the gesture. "Probably not, but go figure. He makes a cute kitty, anyway."

Beast Boy mewed and began to purr, closing his eyes languidly.

Raven arched an eyebrow but said nothing.

The doctor arrived with the nurse as her escort. Everyone knew Dr. Peii by now. She had been attending Starfire's case since she was wheeled into the hospital and the Titans thought her approachable enough. She looked rather severe at first glance, her long, straight ebony hair tied in a somewhat tight ponytail, but she smiled pleasantly at everyone through her slit almond eyes, reminding them that she was quite friendly. She headed straight for Starfire and paused at the sight of Beast Boy.

Robin knew what was coming. "Sorry." He picked Beast Boy by the scruff of his neck and Beast Boy yowled, hissing and spitting as Robin tossed him to the floor.

Beast Boy popped to his feet. "Hey! What's the big—" He paused when he saw the doctor and a blush promptly glowed through the green of his complexion.

It was the first time Dr. Peii had witnessed Beast Boy transform, but perhaps deciding that things were better left unexplained, she shook it off and addressed Starfire. "Hello Ms. Kori Anders, I am Doctor Peii. I have been facilitating your treatment since you first arrived. It's nice to finally have you back with us. How are you feeling?"

Robin wondered about the name. How the heck did the hospital come up with Kori Anders? Then he remembered one of the paramedics asking him about Starfire's name and he had said Koriand'rThe paramedic must have heard wrong and filled up the information sheet based on it.

Starfire took a moment before replying, not bothering to correct the doctor. "My head is painful, and one side of my body feels sore. Also, I… I could see nothing…" A small knot formed on her brow and then disappeared, just as quickly.

Robin exchanged looks with Raven. It was amazing how calmly Starfire was taking it.

"Nurse Brooke informed me about that. We'll try to find out exactly what has caused it, alright? At least you're fully responsive as of this moment. That's a good sign." She made a note on her clipboard. "I'm prescribing acetaminophen for your headaches and the soreness. If that doesn't work, I'll upgrade you to ibuprofens. So tell the nurse if there's any discomfort at all. As for your eye-sight… "

Everyone listened intently.

"Do you see anything at all? Outlines? Shadows? Maybe a haze of light?"

Starfire shook her head.

Dr. Peii frowned. "There have been cases where a patient suffers blindness after severe head trauma, and most of the time, the condition is temporary. Though the blindness could last from days to months, in both cases, we could tell what's causing the condition." There was a moment of silence, as if Dr. Peii was forming the proper words. "In your case, the MRI and CT-scans showed no cortical damage. You had no penetrating injuries, nor were there any obvious depressed fractures to your occipital lobe. There were no clots… there wasn't even a linear skull fracture. Even comatose, you did well on the Glasgow Coma Score. As far as we could tell, your Optic Tracts are intact; nothing was severed. Based on all of that, I could only deduce that your injuries are retinal. In that case, I'd have to refer you to our Ophthalmologist. He'll be able to determine the extent of the damage and why this has happened."

The medical jargon was difficult to follow; Robin could tell by the blank faces surrounding him, but Starfire was nodding grimly. She may be a little slow on social nuances and figurative speech, but her depth of information regarding textbook topics was amazing.

"I understand," she said. "Doctor Peii, from what I know of retinal damage, the treatments are… limited. Am I correct?"

Dr. Peii seemed astonished by this. She looked visibly uncomfortable. "Well… there are studies—"

"All of which are rather inconclusive," Starfire finished for her.

Dr. Peii made a barely audible sigh. "Yes."

There was a collective sound of despair in the room, emanating from all but Starfire.

Robin suddenly felt furious with himself. Starfire wouldn't be in this condition if it hadn't been for him. There were hundreds of possible maneuvers that could have been more effective to save himself, but he had to go choose the one that compelled Starfire to take the hit for him.

"But Ms. Anders, there's a lot of uncertainty regarding your case. You're… well, we've never treated anyone like you, before. Our knowledge is limited to treating—um, Earthlings. I will be making some calls on that respect. Maybe not all hope is lost."

"Maybe." Starfire smiled, but Robin could tell it was forced for the benefit of the doctor.

Dr. Peii rose, telling her to get some rest. She recommended another forty-eight hours of confinement and observation.

She caught sight of Robin before she left the room and gave him a stern stare. "And you, Mr. Robin-the-Boy-Wonder, need to get some rest. You're too young to look so old."

"I'm going on eighteen," Robin muttered rebelliously.

"Like I said, too young. I order you to go to the nurse's station for some prescribed sedatives. Tell them that Dr. Peii sent you, okay?"

Grudgingly, Robin nodded.

When Dr. Peii was gone, Cyborg sighed. "Shorty, I didn't understand half of what that doctor said, but you shouldn't give up easy. You know that, don't you?"

Beast Boy nodded. "Yeah, and what about transplants? I've heard that those things work."

Raven made a sound of derisiveness from her seat. "Eye transplants are limited to the cornea, Beast Boy. It is as far a solution for Starfire's condition as putting ice on her foot to cure a cut on her forehead."

Beast Boy frowned. "What's putting ice on her foot got to do with a cut on her forehead?"

"Nothing."

Beast Boy's brows knotted before comprehension eased the lines away. "Oh."

Raven rose and stepped forward. "Alright everyone, show's over. Starfire really ought to get some rest, so why don't you all just clear out—"

"Raven, apparently, I have been resting for almost four days. Is that not enough?"

Cyborg scowled. "Hey, I just remembered something: my record of sixteen straight hours of sleep! Starfire, you broke my record. Dang!"

Starfire chuckled. "It was not my intention."

"Yeah, that's for sure. But hey, I have my pizza record."

Raven crossed her arms over her chest. "Yes, you do. Are we done here? You all have to go. I'll keep Starfire company."

Robin was about to speak when Raven cut him off.

"Robin, shut up. You've barely slept in the last few days and you look like hell, so now you have to go home. Yes, go home."

He resented Raven taking charge. Starfire had always been his concern. He was Starfire's best friend. "She just woke up! I'm not going home."

"Listen, boy, you're not looking particularly 'wonderful' from where I'm standing and you need to wash off some of that stale Ben Gay, because damn…"

Beast Boy and Cyborg fell to hysterics.

This caught Robin slightly off-guard. "Seriously?" He peered at Starfire, almost for confirmation.

Of course, she made no response. She didn't know he was looking, but Raven nodded. "Yeah."

Defeated, both by Raven's bluntness and the reality that there was nothing he could do for Starfire now, he sighed and reluctantly agreed. Perhaps a good night's sleep would put him in better spirits.

"I'll be here first thing in the morning, Star," he promised, giving her hand a last squeeze.

She smiled. "I shall be looking forward to it."

"Robin, you ought to look into the medication Dr. Peii prescribed for you," said Raven. "I wasn't kidding when I said you looked like hell."

"Believe me, I know you weren't kidding."

He headed for the door but was stopped mid-way when Starfire called him. "Yeah?"

"Be here as early as you can."

He tried not to sound so pleased by the request. "Of course."

Robin left with Cyborg and Beastboy. He did heed Raven's suggestion and dropped by at the nurse's station. He told the nurse behind the counter that Dr. Peii sent him. She was quick to provide him treatment: A glass of warm milk. Inevitably, his companions rolled with laughter, telling "little boy" jokes and how he must miss his mommy. Robin dealt them a glare, but he drank the milk anyway. He'd be damned before he let them think that they got to him.

He didn't know if it was just the milk, or perhaps something mixed in it, but by the time Cyborg was driving them over the Bay in his amphibious T-car, Robin could barely keep his eyes open. It felt like he was drunk on something and all he wanted to do was lie down and pass out in his own coma.

He couldn't remember being dragged in and dumped unceremoniously on his bed. All he could recall was saying something about Starfire and Beast Boy telling him, "Dude, we so know that already!"

When he finally allowed himself to drift off, there was no waking him until the next day.

To be continued…