CHAPTER TWELVE: If I Only Had A Brain

HARRY

Things with Draco . . . What do I say? He said he loved me, and since then I've avoided him. It's not that I don't want him anymore. And it's not that I don't love him back. And it's not that I can't say it, because I can, saying those words are easy to me. . . It's just that - I'm totally dreading it.

My "I love you" will be nothing compared to his, and so I have to think of something to beat his long speech. Many many ways to say it, and to keep a smile on.

Draco would make a great actor, and I think he knows it, and is proud of it too.

He very fond of roses. He put one on my pillow one night, and left me a cute little poem:

Yellow it a colour.

Purple is too.

Why would I ever

eat your shoes?

And so, I don't think he actually hurt Fredrick and Anita. In fact, I think they are in perfect health. And I've finally realized that they were only holding me back. From shoes that actually *fit* me. From shoes who matched my outfits. And now that Rachael and Carol are around, Fred and Any are over with. . . At least, I hope so . . .

*fluttery music plays*

I can remember my old days with them . . . Running through those fields . . . getting splattered with mud that flew into my open mouth . . . all those hours I spent in the muggle hospital as they tried to revive my lungs . . .

Ah, good, good times.

KARA

Hermione and I sat on my dorm bed, looking through photo albums - millions of moving pictures of my vacation days, and the day I got my hair combed for three hours at that secret spa . .. And that was when I came across a picture of Harry and I, holding hands and walking down the corridor - only a year before today's date.

And I believe *that* was when I got the most cruel, most wonderful idea in the history of ideas. "Hermione, I think I'm going to sabotage Harry and Draco's relationship."

She stared as if I were crazy, and then backed away. "You know, Kara - when I started choking people - I got sent away . . . I still have their number if you're feeling kind of crazy-"

"And just how do you suppose being crazy feels?" I demanded.

"*I* certainly don't know! *I'M* not crazy!" and as soon as she said it, she panted with rage. "How could you want to destroy something as wonderful -- so beautiful as their relationship?! You would have the whole school against you - and I would *not* take your side!"

"But think of it my way, Hermione! I was cheated on by him! He didn't love me at all! I *deserve* revenge! And - their relationship, has *anybody* noticed it's homosexual? If Draco's parents found out they would kill him and you certainly can't want him to *die* am I right?" she froze, probably thinking I didn't have a point. But, I did, and I was serious.

"But that is what *makes* it perfect! It being wrong! It's lets people know you're okay to be yourself . . . even if you are crazy . . . even if your obsession is really, really *obsessive* . . . even if you do run around choking people - *friends* care . . ." she got a look in her eyes, and suddenly, her face lit up, and heavenly music played.

We looked around for the source of it. "HEY," Hermione cried. "I am TRYING to make a POINT here and it would be just great if you cut of that pathetic music and the BLINDING light shinning in my eye!"

"Sorry, ma'am!" this guy cried, shutting off his radio and grabbing his light. "I'll be going now . .. you just pretend that I was never here . . ." he ran straight into a dresser and knocked it over. "Oops! I'll fix it - I'll get it . . ." and then he ran, leaving his light laying on the floor.

"WHAT KIND OF MORON CARRIES A LIGHT AND UGLY MUSIC AROUND?! WERE YOU BORN WITHOUT TASTE??!" Hermione cried, angrily, before suddenly changing to the person she normally was. "ANYway . . where was I? . . . Oh, right, Harry and Draco . . . Look, do not even *think* about it, Kara . . . That's really extreme. And I know. I mean, I went around *choking* people." and she left the room, screaming about telling Ron everything.

"They'll be over before you can say Muggle Pudding Packs." I vowed.

"Muggle Pudding Packs!" that guy cried, announcing his return. I gave him a glare, and he gulped. "Well - maybe you should have said something *realistic*. I mean - I was only trying to right your wrong . . . And it was really good, you know, but you sound to happy . . . you've gotta get mean!"

"Oh, but I sound way too *mean* when I'm mean!"

"Well *duh*, that's the *point*!"

"You're right . . . thanks strange man!" I cried, when he went to leave.

"And remember! Make it *realistic*!" he added, before leaving . . . and coming back. "Forgot my light . . ."

I cackled. "They'll be over before you can memorize the dictionary!"

REYAN

My obsession over Draco is becoming way to fucking crazy. I've memorized his daily routine, and I know, that right now, at 17:35 he would be in the bathroom, doing his hair. At exactly 18:00, he will be done with his hair, and will go to write in his "secret diary" thing, and he'll be in bed before 20:20.

He knows I want to shag him, and he's been acting really strange around me since. No more showered together. Which is fucking crazy because I smell just as much as *he* smells when the day is over with, and *I* would like to take a shower first!

Since he began dating Potter, it's been *really* hard to concentrate on anything but it. He invades my once happy dreams of him running to my arms - to him running to *Harry's* arms. And it really fucking sucks, because years ago I had *my* chance with Draco, and years ago I blew it.

I knew that all of Harry's friends were totally against me, so it freaked me out to suddenly notice that Kara - Snape's cousin's sister's husband's daughter's niece. Or something like that. And so her talking to me is absolutely crazy. "You're Reyan Rey, am I right?" she demanded, her hands on her hips.

"Um . . . *Am* I?" figured a little reverse psychology would get rid of her.

"Do you like seeing Draco and Harry together?"

"I dunno . . . *do* I?"

"Don't you wish you could take the one who rightfully belongs to you, and hit them repeatedly until they are back in love with the person they *should* be with?" she was furious now . . . so I played it cool.

"Don't I?"

Her body, which I always thought was weak and boring, picked me up and threw me against the wall, my head cracking open. "Listen to me . . . *REYAN* . . . *You* are the *only* one in this school who wants Harry and Draco to end as much as I do. So, I have consisted a plan - a plan to get them off of each other, and back on us. Because I do *NOT* want mental images of them shagging placed in my head, do *you*?"

And so, I let her little speech thing sink it. No . . . I *didn't* want them together . . . But I didn't want to be the reason they fell *apart, either . . . But, she reassured me. "What are the *odds* that they will break up? Psh, they'll be together forever, and you know it! Now, start acting like a Slytherin, you good-for-nothing coward!"

"Ok," I said, gulping. "I'll go along with your . . . *plan* thing . . . But what's in it for *me*?"

"You'll get your beloved Draco back."

And that would be enough.

A/N: *throws a welcome back party for herself* I am KICKIN' it now!! . . . I know it was short and whatever, and duller than usual . . . but hey, it's hard to write happy when your sad . . . Thanks for all you wonderful reviewers that I love! You know I would like to marry ALL of you, but I think it's impossible . . . therefore, we can have free-sex parties instead!