Fic Off
Chapter Two: Turning The Zoo Into a Zoo Disclaimer: I don't own Wolf's Rain or any other products mentioned. Summary: The wolves have somehow ended up at the zoo, along with the K. O. T. knights (OC). And if the knights are there, it's guaranteed to be Hell. Stolen pants, jousting animals and mayhem everywhere. Qualifications- Sentences: 1) Give me back my pants. 2) Bodily injury may result from the misuse of this (author's choice of object). 3) Don't boggart the penguin. 4) I'm allergic to plastic. Scenes- 1) Someone falls into an animal cage. 2) A jousting match between people on animals.
-------------------------------------- Hige danced with joy as the towering gates of the zoo came into view, "The zoo! We have to go! They have the best food!" Tsume prodded Hige's stomach, "You have enough food in that belly to feed a pack for a year, Porky." Toboe, using the all powerful puppy eyes, clung to Tsume's arm, "Can we go? Please?" Tsume and Kiba exchanged nervous glances, Kiba sighing in resignation, "Okay, but only for a little while." The four wolves-appearing-as-humans, entered the relatively empty zoo. -------------------------------------- Pan, Squirrel, Spork and Spam--a pirating ferret demon--strolled into the zoo. Well, Pan and Spam strolled into the zoo, Squirrel and Spork were pushed in wheelchairs, while playing a game of Go Fish. Pan, struggling to push Squirrel's wheelchair up a steep incline, whined, "Why do you have to sit in these stupid things?" Squirrel grinned innocently, "I'm allergic to plastic. It disables me." The fox demon blinked in confusion, "Eh? Half of this wheelchair is made of plastic!" The red and black haired squirrel demon nodded solemnly, "Exactly, which is why I'm disabled." Pan glanced at Spam, trying to push Spork's wheelchair up the stairs, "Does that make any sense, Spam?" The ferret demon, having succeeded in her task, frowned, "This is Squirrel we're talking about. Does anything she say make sense?" All four demons chorused, "No! It's the Knight's code! No words spoken by a true Knight of the Octagon Table should make sense to the moronic mortals!"
And thus, Pan stopped complaining about pushing Squirrel everywhere and Spam learned that pushing wheelchairs down stairs was really fun, as did Spork. As the four peculiar knights reached a rather steeply sloped hill, they gasped at the spacious zoo stretched out below. Pan and Spam exchanged eager looks. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" They both asked. Squirrel and Spork nodded, "Let's do it!" With cries of joy, Pan and Spam leapt onto the back of the wheelchairs, sending the contraptions careening down the hill at break neck speed. ------------------------------------------ Tsume stopped, glancing around suspiciously. "Do you hear that?" Hige, face covered in chocolate ice cream and pieces of popcorn, looked up from his bag of candy, "Hear what?" Toboe glanced around, hugging a stuffed zebra nervously, "It sounds like screaming." "We should get out of here," Kiba said, becoming alert. "Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" The sound of four screeches of joy sounded from nearby. Tsume's eyes nearly bulged out of his skull when he saw the two wheelchairs, laden with two demons each, speeding toward him. Before he could jump out of the way, the wheelchairs collided, sending him and the four girls crashing through a large hedge. Hige, Toboe and Kiba pulled the hedge out of the way, staring at the three girls and Tsume hanging on a long metal railing used to border the animal cage. The fourth girl, Spam, was lying on the oddly white ground, inside the cage. Pan, Spork and Squirrel were helped onto solid ground by Kiba and Hige. Toboe helped Tsume. Spam sat up, rubbing her head as she surveyed her surroundings. "Hey! Look at all the cool white ice and water!" Pan, peering into the cage, laughed, "That's the penguin exhibit!" "Duh!" Spam yelled as she was greeted by three fat little penguins, "Hi, little buddies!" She began to pet two of the penguins, the third growing angry from lack of attention. Squirrel, Pan and Spork, giggling hysterically, covered their eyes as Spam shouted in embarrassment, "Hey! Give me back my pants!" The ferret demon chased the third, neglected penguin around the cage, her baggy pants clamped firmly in its beak. The other two penguins were on their backs, their squawks resembling laughter. Squirrel, Pan, and Spork glanced down at the squawking penguins then to each other, "Squawking penguins!" They went into a new fit of giggles. Spam, having finally recovered her pants and apologized to the thief penguin, climbed out of the cage. The four wolves and four knights stood watching the black and white flightless birds for a few moments. A rude zoo go-er tapped Pan on the shoulder, "Hey! Don't boggart the penguin." Spam arched an eyebrow, "Penguin? There's more than one. Can't you count?" The zoo go-er blinked a few times, blushing, "No. Don't rub it in!" He ran away, crying for his mommy. Pan snickered, "Luz0r!" She looked at the four nervous wolves, "Hi! I'm Pan! And these fellow lunatics are Squirrel, Spork and Spam!" She gestured to each knight. Hige, liking the idea of hanging out with females--especially one that was a fox, which he considered to be close enough to a wolf--cleared his throat, "I'm Hige. And these guys are Toboe, Kiba and Tsume." Spork immediately glued herself to Kiba's side, "Hello!" Kiba stared in surprise at her, "Do you have to use industrial strength glue?" The squirrel demon nodded, "Yup." Squirrel, feeling she should be leader of their group, pointed down a path, "To the camels!" She began marching. Spam, Pan, Hige and Toboe imitating her. Kiba tried to break from the glue bond between him and Spork, but was dragged along anyways. Tsume brought up the rear with his tight ass. "Camels, Ho!" Squirrel hollered, waving to the camels. She hopped into the cage and onto the back of the largest camel she could find. "Giddy up!" The camel began running around the exhibit, leaping easily over the fence and landing inches from Pan's feet. "Heeey! Watch it, Squirrel!" Pan yelled. Squirrel giggled, "Pan! I challenge ye to a showdown!" She faced her camel at Pan, "Choose your animal!" Pan, thinking quickly, jumped over the barrier to the elephant exhibit. Climbing onto one of the elephant's back, she urged the creature to crash through the cage fence. She faced Squirrel and her camel, "Bring it on, Squirrel!" She whipped out a skillet from her belt, leveling it like a lance. Squirrel, choosing a toilet brush as her lance, dug her heels into the camel's side, causing it to charge at Pan and the elephant. Pan did the same with her mount, racing at Squirrel with her skillet at the ready. Hige and Spam covered their eyes as the inevitable crash grew closer. Spork covered both her eyes and Kiba's, while Tsume shielded Toboe's young eyes. The elephant and camel collided like two freight trains, sending the demons flying. Squirrel landed on an elderly lady, Pan landed in a tree. Spam and Spork, trying hard to keep straight faces, helped Squirrel to her feet, completely ignoring the elderly woman, and Pan out of the tree. Pan stumbled, holding her head, "Oy, those elephants need a label that says 'Bodily injury may result from the misuse of this pachyderm.'" Squirrel nodded in agreement. Hige offered the jousters popsicles, "You guys jousted like real knights! It was awesome!" Pan scowled, "We are real knights. We are..." "...The Knights of the Octagon Table!!" All four demons chorused gleefully.
Toboe grinned, "Cool! We got to meet real live knights!" He was about to bounce with joy when a heavy hand on his shoulder stopped him. He blinked up into the angry eyes of a Zoo Security Guard. "Excuse me, have you been jousting with Zoo Property?" The guard asked. "Have you been eating all the donuts?" Spork asked, prodding the guard's rather round stomach. "That's it. You're outta here." The guard said, and with some amazing Security Guard Power, managed to throw all eight of them outside the Zoo gates. Toboe, still clinging to his stuffed zebra, sighed, "I didn't get to see the lemurs." Pan grinned wickedly, "Don't be so sure. I took this to torment Spork." She pulled a ring-tailed lemur from her shirt, throwing it on Spork. "ACK!" Spork fell back, punching the lemur off her and onto Toboe's head. "You're going down, Pan!" She pulled a mole from her bottomless pants and tossed it on the fox demon, sending her running home to the K. O. T. castle with her fluffy tail between her legs. Spork chased after her with an armful of rabid moles. Squirrel and Spam, leading the jousting camel and elephant--affectionately named Humpy and Trumpy--followed the spastic pair, leaving the four wolves to go where they pleased. ===========================Zeh end! A/N: I did this as a "Fic Off" (Lol...fic off...) with my sister. The qualifications were a few sentences, two scenes, and it had to be done in an hour. Read my sister's under the pen name "Sango5", it's titled "Fic Off". XP I hope you liked it, please review!!!
Chapter Two: Turning The Zoo Into a Zoo Disclaimer: I don't own Wolf's Rain or any other products mentioned. Summary: The wolves have somehow ended up at the zoo, along with the K. O. T. knights (OC). And if the knights are there, it's guaranteed to be Hell. Stolen pants, jousting animals and mayhem everywhere. Qualifications- Sentences: 1) Give me back my pants. 2) Bodily injury may result from the misuse of this (author's choice of object). 3) Don't boggart the penguin. 4) I'm allergic to plastic. Scenes- 1) Someone falls into an animal cage. 2) A jousting match between people on animals.
-------------------------------------- Hige danced with joy as the towering gates of the zoo came into view, "The zoo! We have to go! They have the best food!" Tsume prodded Hige's stomach, "You have enough food in that belly to feed a pack for a year, Porky." Toboe, using the all powerful puppy eyes, clung to Tsume's arm, "Can we go? Please?" Tsume and Kiba exchanged nervous glances, Kiba sighing in resignation, "Okay, but only for a little while." The four wolves-appearing-as-humans, entered the relatively empty zoo. -------------------------------------- Pan, Squirrel, Spork and Spam--a pirating ferret demon--strolled into the zoo. Well, Pan and Spam strolled into the zoo, Squirrel and Spork were pushed in wheelchairs, while playing a game of Go Fish. Pan, struggling to push Squirrel's wheelchair up a steep incline, whined, "Why do you have to sit in these stupid things?" Squirrel grinned innocently, "I'm allergic to plastic. It disables me." The fox demon blinked in confusion, "Eh? Half of this wheelchair is made of plastic!" The red and black haired squirrel demon nodded solemnly, "Exactly, which is why I'm disabled." Pan glanced at Spam, trying to push Spork's wheelchair up the stairs, "Does that make any sense, Spam?" The ferret demon, having succeeded in her task, frowned, "This is Squirrel we're talking about. Does anything she say make sense?" All four demons chorused, "No! It's the Knight's code! No words spoken by a true Knight of the Octagon Table should make sense to the moronic mortals!"
And thus, Pan stopped complaining about pushing Squirrel everywhere and Spam learned that pushing wheelchairs down stairs was really fun, as did Spork. As the four peculiar knights reached a rather steeply sloped hill, they gasped at the spacious zoo stretched out below. Pan and Spam exchanged eager looks. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" They both asked. Squirrel and Spork nodded, "Let's do it!" With cries of joy, Pan and Spam leapt onto the back of the wheelchairs, sending the contraptions careening down the hill at break neck speed. ------------------------------------------ Tsume stopped, glancing around suspiciously. "Do you hear that?" Hige, face covered in chocolate ice cream and pieces of popcorn, looked up from his bag of candy, "Hear what?" Toboe glanced around, hugging a stuffed zebra nervously, "It sounds like screaming." "We should get out of here," Kiba said, becoming alert. "Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" The sound of four screeches of joy sounded from nearby. Tsume's eyes nearly bulged out of his skull when he saw the two wheelchairs, laden with two demons each, speeding toward him. Before he could jump out of the way, the wheelchairs collided, sending him and the four girls crashing through a large hedge. Hige, Toboe and Kiba pulled the hedge out of the way, staring at the three girls and Tsume hanging on a long metal railing used to border the animal cage. The fourth girl, Spam, was lying on the oddly white ground, inside the cage. Pan, Spork and Squirrel were helped onto solid ground by Kiba and Hige. Toboe helped Tsume. Spam sat up, rubbing her head as she surveyed her surroundings. "Hey! Look at all the cool white ice and water!" Pan, peering into the cage, laughed, "That's the penguin exhibit!" "Duh!" Spam yelled as she was greeted by three fat little penguins, "Hi, little buddies!" She began to pet two of the penguins, the third growing angry from lack of attention. Squirrel, Pan and Spork, giggling hysterically, covered their eyes as Spam shouted in embarrassment, "Hey! Give me back my pants!" The ferret demon chased the third, neglected penguin around the cage, her baggy pants clamped firmly in its beak. The other two penguins were on their backs, their squawks resembling laughter. Squirrel, Pan, and Spork glanced down at the squawking penguins then to each other, "Squawking penguins!" They went into a new fit of giggles. Spam, having finally recovered her pants and apologized to the thief penguin, climbed out of the cage. The four wolves and four knights stood watching the black and white flightless birds for a few moments. A rude zoo go-er tapped Pan on the shoulder, "Hey! Don't boggart the penguin." Spam arched an eyebrow, "Penguin? There's more than one. Can't you count?" The zoo go-er blinked a few times, blushing, "No. Don't rub it in!" He ran away, crying for his mommy. Pan snickered, "Luz0r!" She looked at the four nervous wolves, "Hi! I'm Pan! And these fellow lunatics are Squirrel, Spork and Spam!" She gestured to each knight. Hige, liking the idea of hanging out with females--especially one that was a fox, which he considered to be close enough to a wolf--cleared his throat, "I'm Hige. And these guys are Toboe, Kiba and Tsume." Spork immediately glued herself to Kiba's side, "Hello!" Kiba stared in surprise at her, "Do you have to use industrial strength glue?" The squirrel demon nodded, "Yup." Squirrel, feeling she should be leader of their group, pointed down a path, "To the camels!" She began marching. Spam, Pan, Hige and Toboe imitating her. Kiba tried to break from the glue bond between him and Spork, but was dragged along anyways. Tsume brought up the rear with his tight ass. "Camels, Ho!" Squirrel hollered, waving to the camels. She hopped into the cage and onto the back of the largest camel she could find. "Giddy up!" The camel began running around the exhibit, leaping easily over the fence and landing inches from Pan's feet. "Heeey! Watch it, Squirrel!" Pan yelled. Squirrel giggled, "Pan! I challenge ye to a showdown!" She faced her camel at Pan, "Choose your animal!" Pan, thinking quickly, jumped over the barrier to the elephant exhibit. Climbing onto one of the elephant's back, she urged the creature to crash through the cage fence. She faced Squirrel and her camel, "Bring it on, Squirrel!" She whipped out a skillet from her belt, leveling it like a lance. Squirrel, choosing a toilet brush as her lance, dug her heels into the camel's side, causing it to charge at Pan and the elephant. Pan did the same with her mount, racing at Squirrel with her skillet at the ready. Hige and Spam covered their eyes as the inevitable crash grew closer. Spork covered both her eyes and Kiba's, while Tsume shielded Toboe's young eyes. The elephant and camel collided like two freight trains, sending the demons flying. Squirrel landed on an elderly lady, Pan landed in a tree. Spam and Spork, trying hard to keep straight faces, helped Squirrel to her feet, completely ignoring the elderly woman, and Pan out of the tree. Pan stumbled, holding her head, "Oy, those elephants need a label that says 'Bodily injury may result from the misuse of this pachyderm.'" Squirrel nodded in agreement. Hige offered the jousters popsicles, "You guys jousted like real knights! It was awesome!" Pan scowled, "We are real knights. We are..." "...The Knights of the Octagon Table!!" All four demons chorused gleefully.
Toboe grinned, "Cool! We got to meet real live knights!" He was about to bounce with joy when a heavy hand on his shoulder stopped him. He blinked up into the angry eyes of a Zoo Security Guard. "Excuse me, have you been jousting with Zoo Property?" The guard asked. "Have you been eating all the donuts?" Spork asked, prodding the guard's rather round stomach. "That's it. You're outta here." The guard said, and with some amazing Security Guard Power, managed to throw all eight of them outside the Zoo gates. Toboe, still clinging to his stuffed zebra, sighed, "I didn't get to see the lemurs." Pan grinned wickedly, "Don't be so sure. I took this to torment Spork." She pulled a ring-tailed lemur from her shirt, throwing it on Spork. "ACK!" Spork fell back, punching the lemur off her and onto Toboe's head. "You're going down, Pan!" She pulled a mole from her bottomless pants and tossed it on the fox demon, sending her running home to the K. O. T. castle with her fluffy tail between her legs. Spork chased after her with an armful of rabid moles. Squirrel and Spam, leading the jousting camel and elephant--affectionately named Humpy and Trumpy--followed the spastic pair, leaving the four wolves to go where they pleased. ===========================Zeh end! A/N: I did this as a "Fic Off" (Lol...fic off...) with my sister. The qualifications were a few sentences, two scenes, and it had to be done in an hour. Read my sister's under the pen name "Sango5", it's titled "Fic Off". XP I hope you liked it, please review!!!