Marla and Bernie made their way down the half-empty stands that surrounded Pioneer Two City's Battle Arena towards a group of androids. Though 'Last Survivor' battles were generally quite popular, it was still morning and these were the off-season practice bouts, watched only by friends of the combatants and those who enjoyed seeing Hunters hit each other.
"Excuse me, is this the Robot Revolution Republic?" Marla asked them.
"Fuck off!" Shouted a dark red HUcast rising to his feet. "We're the Republic of Robot Revolutionaries."
"Right... So your group's initials are also RRR then?"
"Yeah, but we choose the name first... SPLITTERS!"
The HUcast turned and waved a fist at another group of androids sitting around twenty-five metres further on. Both groups promptly shouted 'Splitters' and exchanged obscene hand gestures.
"O... Kay. So... Kidnap any androids lately?" Marla asked casually.
"We noble members of the Republic of Robot Revolutionaries do not resort to 'kidnap' to free our mechanical brethren..."
"Umm, well Nisshoku, there was that one time..." Said a red and white HUcast.
"Brother Cosmo is of course correct. There was that one time but there were... Circumstances." Said Nisshoku.
Marla looked at Cosmo more closely. His creator had chosen to adorn him with an unusual feature...
"You're looking at my head-wang right? It's okay to look if you want."
"Uh... Maybe later..."
Just then, one of the fighters in the arena below defeated another.
"That's it my robot brother! Slay the fleshbags! Kill them all!" Shouted Nisshoku enthusiastically.
"Wait..." Said Bernie. "If you've got such strong anti-fleshbag... Er... Anti-human sentiments, then what about him?" Bernie pointed at the purple-haired, purple clad RAmar sitting down eating a mini-burrito.
"What? Sunblast? He's not a member." Replied Nisshoku.
"I'm here for Cosmo." Said Sunblast between mouthfuls. "I like to give him support in his activities."
"Well, do you know if the Robot Revolution Republic are involved in anything of that nature?" Marla asked Nisshoku.
"Their processors are too feeble to be of any threat to anyone. If they attempted something like that, even a pitiful fleshbag like you would catch them... SPLITTERS!"
The two groups once again exchanged jeers and obscene hand gestures. Marla waited till they all settled down before activating her radio communicator.
"BOC, get back to work."
A dented black RAcast from the other group stood up and sighed loudly enough for them to hear him before stomping away in the direction of the exit.
"Okay, well are there any androids that you might suspect?"
"The only group I can think of that match that profile is the Popular Revolutionary Republic of Robots." Nisshoku pointed down the stands to where a lone purple and cream HUcast sat watching the fights intently.
"SPLITTER!" Shouted the all of the Republic of Robot Revolutionaries.
The android turned his head slightly and cast a chilling glance up the stands at them. The group fell silent immediately.
"Kidnap's not Kireek's kind of thing normally. "Said Nisshoku almost whispering. "He's more of a 'kill you till you're dead' kind of android. Now I wouldn't disapprove of that sort of thing, especially if it's fleshbags, but Kireek is very indiscriminate. What's with the questions anyway? The RRR is neither not involved in nor planning to be involved in any kind of criminal activity."
"Yeah. It's not like we're planning to assassinate someone." Added Cosmo.
Nisshoku gave Cosmo a glare that would have melted steel had his maker had the foresight to equip him with heat-vision.
"I think you two should leave now." He said indicating Marla and Bernie.
"Okay, but before I go, a final question. Is a HUcaseal named Anti-Tank affiliated with any of your groups?"
"Unfortunately, we have found it very hard to attract the membership of our fine robot sisters..."
All the males present went "Amen!"
"... But we live in hope."
Nisshoku watched as the two RAngers retreated back up the steps towards the exit.
"Bah, humans eh? What have they ever done for us?" He said out aloud.
"Uh... Well they did build us." Suggested Cosmo.
"And they designed us." Said another.
"And they repair us when we get damaged." Said a small RAcast.
"Okay. Well apart from building us and designing us and repairing us when we get damaged, what have the humans ever done for us?"
"RAcaseals?" Suggested Sunblast.
"Oh well, the RAcaseals. They pretty much go without saying. So apart from the building and the designing and the repairing..."
"And the RAcaseals."
"And the RAcaseals, thank you brother Girder, what have the humans ever done for us?"
"How about treating us as equals and accepting us into their society even after all the wars we keep having with them?"
Nisshoku shook his head and sighed loud as he took out a Bloody Art dagger.
"The NEXT person to answer my rhetorical question will get this shoved right up his data port!"