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All Alone?

Chapter 16

Disclaimer: you know the drill...

Okay, let's go. This is the chapter that totally throws our character's lives out of proportion. Haha. I think I should tease you more, but I'm gonna be nice, so I'll continue with the story!

Chapter 16!

Remus opened the house door, and let Violet in first. She dropped her stuff and looked curiously at the table. "Have you had company?" she asked curiously, staring at the two half empty coffee mugs on the table.

Remus paled, but quickly recovered. "I had that Davey Gudgeon fellow over today. He wanted to interview me." he lied quickly.

Violet looked suspiciously at him, but gave him the benifit of the doubt, and started lugging her trunk and broom to her room. After dropping them, she sat down on her bed miserably, with her head in her hands. It was hard to believe that about this time yesterday, she was heading to Potions with no clue what was about to happen. Life's funny that way, she mused. You can be totally carefree and clueless one minute, and the next your life can be totally changed. It's bizarre.

Her thought's were interrupted by a gentle knock on her door. She looked up and Remus was sitting down on the bed beside her. She looked up at him for a moment, then looked back down. She was so ashamed of the way she'd acted. Not only had she totally screwed herself over, but she betrayed Remus, and that hurt worse. She knew she was being a wuss, but she did love Remus more than anything else in the world right now, and she felt like shit when she betrayed him.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and she pulled away. "Violet?" Remus questioned, obviously hurt. "What's wrong?"

"You know what's wrong." she muttered.

"You're upset what happened yesterday, huh?" he said understandingly.

"Not just that..." Violet said quietly, before finally getting the courage to look him in the face. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Oh." Remus understood now. "Vi. You didn't hurt me." He said reassuringly. "Well, I was disappointed and, needless to say, very angry, but I'm not mad anymore."

Violet couldn't help but feel a little relieved. "Okay."

Remus couldn't help but smile. "All right, kid." he messed up her hair. "I guess I might as well get you some breakfast."

Violet wasn't very hungry, but after being starved most of her life, she didn't believe in turning down food. And who could blame her?

It was ten o' clock in the morning already, but Remus didn't seem to mind, fixing them both a large breakfast. While Violet wolfed it down like it was her last meal, which she did with almost everything she ate, Remus told her about the latest on Sirius's case. He didn't seem to want to talk about it, but he did tell her that he spoke with a Ministry official, and they'd found clues as to where Peter Pettigrew was hiding out.

"He said that he was almost certain that Sirius would be declared innocent." Remus said, biting into his burnt bacon.

"That's fantastic, Rem." Violet said earnestly, before her voice drifted off to sadness. "But, after a while, I start to think, what's the point? I mean, he's dead." After over six months, it still hurt to state the facts. "So, it won't do any good to go to all the trouble, when he won't get to reap the benefits."

Remus was avoiding her eyes, and he still looked a bit pale. "Yeah, well. It's-it's a tribute to his memory..." he stammered. "And... well... I just don't want to talk about it anymore!"

Violet studied his face, and it was more out of desperation than anything that he snapped at her. He was perspiring slightly. Though the curiosity was driving her crazy, she decided to leave it at that.

Remus abruptly changed the subject. "How is your Animagus training going?"

Violet smiled. "It's going a lot better. McGonagall said I might be ready to take my test in another month."

"That's great, Vi. I'm proud of you."

She looked up sharply, and saw that he meant it. She felt color rising in her cheeks.

She suddenly dropped her plate in the sink, where it instantly began cleaning itself, and headed for the training room. Even with the replica that she'd been using for the past three-and-a-half months, it felt good to be back in the old room. It was like seeing a long lost friend or something. She stretched out, doing butterflies, straddles, etc. Then, she worked on her basic strength training: pushups, even though she loathed them, crunches, weights, pullups, flexed arm hang, then later, the rope. Then she moved on to her favorite part: the punching bag. After the first punch, she heard, "Oh no. It's you again, isn't it?"

After a minute of pummeling the bag, she felt a tap on her shoulder. She spun around, just in time to see a gloved fist heading for her face. She blocked it just in time. "That was a cheap shot, Remus!" she yelled, throwing one at him.

"So?" he grinned. "You managed to block it, didn't you? Besides," he yelled, ducking under one of her right hooks. "I doubt if anyone jumps you, they're going to worry about cheap shots!"

"Why do you have to think so literally all the time!" Violet shouted in frustration, trying to trip him, only to have him jump just in time. "You've gotten better!" she complimented. "Normally, I'd have you down in less than a minute!"

"Yeah." Remus said thoughtfully. "Either that or you've gotten worse." he said cheekily, whipping out a sword.

Violet didn't have a weapon on her, so she mostly relied on ducking and blocking. Finally, she kicked his hand, sending the sword flying in the air. Of course, she caught it by the hilt, tripped Remus in time, and lightly pressed the tip to his throat. "You give?" she grinned. She hadn't had this much fun in a while.

Remus nodded, and she dropped the sword and stretched out a hand to help him up. She should have known better when she saw the mischievous spark in his eyes. He did take her hand, but instead of sitting up, he pulled her to the ground beside him.

"Remus!" Violet said, smacking his arm, but making no effort to get up. She felt rather comfortable the way she was. But then, Remus flicked his wand with a tickling spell.. She shrieked in both surprise and laughter, struggling to get away from the imaginary tickler.

"Say 'Moony rules!'" He said enjoying the look of agony on her face as she twisted and struggled to no avail.

"Never!" she gasped, tears leaking out of the corners of her eyes. She screeched when the tickling spell was intensified.

Remus looked down at her, grinning evilly. "Who rules!" he said.

"N-n-not you!" she gasped for breath again. "Come on, Remus, stop it! I-I'm not-not playing anymore!"

"All you have to do is say those two words, Violet." he said nonchalantly, twirling his wand between two fingers.

Violet finally choked, "M-m-moony rules!"

"Huh?" He pretended to have gone deaf. "What was that?"

"Come on, Rem! I said it, now take the curse off me!"

"All right." he sighed. "You're no fun." He muttered the countercurse and Violet collapsed, gasping for breath. He grinned. "Wow. That was easy."

"You'll pay for that, Remus." she growled, before breaking into a grin. "Well, I definetely feel better, that's for sure. But DON'T DO IT AGAIN!" she shreiked.

Remus jumped and winced. "You sure you haven't got a little banshee in your blood, kid?"

"I don't know. I've sometimes wondered whether or not I'm entirely human." Violet raised her eyebrows.

Remus arched his own eyebrows. "You sure are weird, kiddo."

"Thanks, wolf." If anyone else had said something along those lines to Remus, they wouldn't see out of one eye for a week. Violet however, got away with it regularly.

"All right, lazy." He said, grabbing her hand and pulling her upright. "Come back to the living room and lay down, don't lay on the floor."

"I'm not lazy! I do more exercise than you've done in forever!" Violet protested.

"That sounds like a challenge." Remus grinned.

"It wasn't. I'm not challenging you because you cheat." She stuck her tongue out at him.

"Violet Lily Potter!" he said, faking a hurt look. "Now that hurts my feelings. Just for that, I'm gonna cast another tickling spell on you."

Violet was ready this time, and dove out of the way. They started dueling again. But this time, Remus tackled her to the ground when her back was turned.

"Remus!" She grabbed him by his wrist and pulled him to the ground beside her. She then pinned his chest to the floor with her knee and pulled out her wand, aiming it threateningly.

"Truce!" Remus said weakly. Violet debated before finally stepping back and allowing him to stand up. "Truce?" he asked, holding out his pinkies.

Violet laughed, hooking her pinkies in his, before hugging him good-naturedly. "Let's go. I'm tired of wrestling."

He followed her to the living room. "How come I never got a truce?" Violet wanted to know.

"Because you never asked me." Remus grinned.

"Aren't you in a smart-ass mood today?" Violet said playfully.

"Language, Vi. Do I have to wash your mouth out with soap?" Remus conjured a bar of soap and tried to stick it in her mouth. She ducked easily, backing out of the room, and into the hall. Remus suddenly ran after her and tried chasing after her for a while. Luckily, she was a lot faster and younger than Remus. Finally, Remus dropped onto the couch, worn out already. "I'm too old for this." He panted.

Violet laughed. Remus beckoned for her to sit beside him. She dropped on the couch and Remus casually put an arm around her. "What's up, Remus?" she said curiously.

"Nothing." he muttered. "I've missed you is all. I mean, you are like the daughter I never had."

Violet felt embarrassed, but pleased. "Well, I missed you too." she smiled

"I don't know what I'd do without you."

Violet's face was getting hot. "All right." she twisted around to face him. "What do you want?"

"Nothing!" Remus looked offended, then jokingly said, "Well, you could make dinner tonight..."

"Done." Violet said with a grin, standing up.

Remus grabbed her arm and pulled her back down. "Wait." he paused. "I've had a lot going on lately... and..." he struggled for the right words to say s she wouldn't let it slip. "Well, I just need to let you know that I'll sort everything out and it'll be okay." He stared into her eyes. "I promise."

Violet really did start to get suspicious. "All right, Rem. There's something you're not telling me. Spill."

Remus bit his lip, suddenly wishing he'd never said anything. "It's nothing. I'm just probably going to be a little psycho for next couple of weeks and if I snap at you, I'm sorry."

Violet sighed, but she knew not to push it any further. She'd had people do that to her, and she hadn't liked it, so she understood, or thought she did. "All right, Rem. I'll drop it." she started to think of something to change the subject. "Up until about a month ago, I was having these weird dreams." She started to go into detail about her dreams, studying Remus's face. He was chewing on his lip hard and studying his hands. She showed him the burn that still wasn't gone from her hand. "What do you think of that, Remus?"

"I-I don't know. It could be Voldemort, it could be something else... You may have to talk to Dumbledore about it."

"But they stopped a little less than a month ago." Violet's brow furrowed. "That's wierd."

A little less than a month ago. That was when everything fell apart… Remus thought. He wondered how much longer he would have to keep this from Violet. He hated keeping secrets from her.

He found himself looking at the clock. "It's lunchtime. Let me make something."

"I can do it," she volunteered.

"No. I've got it." Remus said, getting out a large can of soup, and stuff to make sandwiches.

Violet sighed and shook her head. She had no idea just what was with him. Oh well, she'd find out later. Right now, she was hungry.

Lunch was pretty silent. Remus was afraid he'd let something slip, and Violet was afraid she would say the wrong thing and upset Remus. She decided to just eat lunch and hang out in her room for a while.

Ah, her room... it felt so nice to lie on her own bed. She stared at her starry walls, and then closed the curtains so she could look at them a little more. She remembered the other day's homework, to find your star and read it. Violet found hers, all right, but she couldn't make anything out right now. Besides, it looked really bleak. Oh, that's really nice..., she thought.

So, she tried playing her guitar to get her mind off of things. She played Aerials by System of a Down, and wasn't interrupted until Remus poked his head into her room, raising his eyebrow at Violet, jumping up and down, roaring the chorus.

"How can you stand that noise?" Music had always been one thing Violet and Remus had disagreed on. She glared at him and sang on. He shook his head and went back to the living room.

After playing Awake by Godsmack and Going Under by, of course, Evanescence, Violet went back to the training room. She wasn't used to lying around all day. She felt that she had to be active or she'd go crazy (A/N: opposite of me! I guess Violet's how I wish I were!). Of course, Remus eventually tried to sneak up on her, but it didn't work, she ducked and socked him in the stomach.

"You'll have to speed it up if you want to get me, Remus!" she taunted.

Of course, they dueled the way they usually did, Remus whipping out weapons at the last minute and Violet blocking them. But, surprisingly, Remus tackled Violet and pinned her to the ground. With a grin, he asked her, "Give?"

"Yeah, I give, you cheater." she snapped, irritated. But, it was impossible to stay mad at a grinning Remus. She stood up and brushed herself off. "Oh well. I think it's a world record! Remus has successfully pinned Violet down! Let's celebrate! How about firewhisky?"

"Don't even think about it." Remus warned.

Violet and Remus only stopped going at each other when it was ten o' clock, and they simultaneously yawned. After staring at each other for a minute, they snickered, and Remus pulled Violet into a warm hug. "Good night, Violet." he said softly.

"Night, Rem." she said, resting her chin on his shoulder.

"I love you." Even though it was true, Remus always felt like a pansy when he said it.

"I love you too."

"It's good to have you back home." Remus assured her. They pulled away, and headed for their rooms. Before they both disappeared, he shouted, "Even though you got suspended!"

Violet retaliated in the most mature and intelligent way she knew how: sticking her tongue out at the back of his head.

She didn't think she would be able to sleep, but surprisingly, as soon as her head hit the pillow she was out.

The next thing she knew, she was wide-awake, and it was dark. She looked at her alarm clock. It read: 3:32

She sighed, and tried to get to sleep, but it was no use. So she got up and went the kitchen for some water. After chugging down two glasses, she headed back for her room, then stopped. She could have sworn she'd heard voices coming from Remus's room. She listened hard. Yes, there they were again. With her natural curiosity, Violet tiptoed toward Remus's room and saw that the door was partially open. She peered through the crack in the door.

She could see Remus, but not the person he was talking to.

"Yes, I know it's unfair!" Remus said, looking extremely harassed. "But, she's just gotten over it. I can't just dump this on her now!"

"She needs to know, Remus!" shouted a hoarse voice that sounded vaguely familiar. "What, am I supposed to hide from Violet for my whole life? I've done enough hiding, Remus!"

"I know!" Remus said, running his hand distractedly through his hair. "I just... I don't know how she's going to take it!"

"Please, Moony..." the voice begged, and it took Violet a while to register what she'd said. "I miss her. She's all I've got in the world."

While Remus answered gently, Violet suddenly thought of something. She'd heard only one person besides herself call Remus Lupin "Moony". She gasped silently, a wave of nausea running through her. No... no, it couldn't be. But she had to find out. In one movement, she shoved the door open.

"Remus, who are you talking t--" Her voice died in her throat. For the person that Remus was talking to was none other than the man she had thought about more in the past six months than anyone else. The pale, thin face... the shadowed eyes... belonged to none other than--

"Sirius..." she uttered, unable to believe it. Yes, the man standing before her was the convicted murderer himself, Violet's godfather.

He stared at her with just as much shock as she did at him. It was too much. The room and its occupants were spinning slowly before her eyes. Sweat was trickling down her face, and her breath was coming in short gasps. No. No. It wasn't true. "It-it can't be... You're dead." she said plainly.

"Violet." Remus touched her shoulder, but she jerked away. "Violet, please listen to me." Remus forced her to look at him, holding her face in a vise-like grip. His pleading eyes bored into hers. "I can explain it."

"No. No! He's dead! He died-- six months ago!" she struggled to get away, but Remus held on to her tighter.

"Violet! Calm down!" he shouted, but she screamed right back at him.

"NO! He's dead! He can't be here!" she fought and struggled to get away, but Remus wouldn't let go. She was painfully reminded of the night Sirius died. She had to get away... "Let me go."

"No, Violet. We need to talk about this." Remus held her, hoping she would struggle her way into exhaustion. But, it wasn't that easy.

"LET ME GO!" She shrieked, suddenly bringing her knee up and ramming it into Remus's stomach.
Remus grunted in pain, and loosened his grip just enough to allow her to run. She bolted out of the bedroom and out the back door, running blindly into the darkness.

Remus, who had been bent over in pain, finally stood up with a grimace. "Now do you see why I didn't want to tell her yet?"

Sirius looked sadly out the door. He knew he couldn't expect her to greet him with a hug the first time she saw him, but it hurt all the same. Remus noticed this, and clapped Sirius reassuringly on the shoulder.

"It'll be okay, mate. As soon as she calms down, she'll be able to accept it."

"I hope so..." Sirius said sadly.

Meanwhile, Violet was still running blindly, until she heard a sickening crack, and felt the "ground" beneath her give way. Suddenly, she fell through the ground into icy water. She screamed once before her head went under.

Sirius and Remus were sitting out on the back porch, shivering when they heard it. An earsplitting crack, followed by an almost earsplitting scream.

"The pond!" Remus gasped, getting up and sprinting toward it. He stopped when he felt the ground getting slippery, and pulled out his wand. "Lumos." he muttered, and searched the icy pond. There... there was the place it had cracked. And there... was Violet! She was struggling to stay above the surface, her hair soaked and full of ice. He ran toward her, then stopped when he heard little cracks. He remembered what he'd read and immediately laid flat on his stomach. He pushed himself forward, until he was close enough to reach Violet. "Grab my hand!" He shouted.

She tried, she gripped his hand momentarily, but she was just too numb to hold on. She screamed as she went under the surface. Remus wondered desperately how he would get her out. Wingardium Leviosa wouldn't work on a human. Mobilicorpus only worked if you were unconscious. Suddenly a flash of black bounded by him and landed into the icy water.

Sirius, in his dog form, latched onto Violet with his teeth, and with Remus's help, got the freezing girl out of the pond. Remus pushed her in front of him, while he awkwardly crawled behind her. Finally, when they were on solid ground, Remus sat up, holding Violet in his arms for dear life.

"I'm so-so c-c-c-cold!" she sputtered, clinging to Remus for warmth.

"It's all right, Vi. I've got you." He pulled off his robes, now clad in only a pair of jeans. He wrapped his robes tightly around Violet's violently trembling form. He hooked his left arm under her knees and held his right under her back and easily lifted her up. Followed closely by Sirius, now in his human form, he carried Violet back to the house.

Remus sat Violet on the couch and turned to Sirius. "Just go wait in my room. I need to talk to her first." Sirius looked crushed. "Do it. Please." Remus pleaded, and finally Sirius complied, disappearing into Lupin's room.

Remus pulled out his wand and blew hot air on Violet, aiming specifically for her hair, working it with his fingers. By the time she'd stopped shivering too badly to talk, she pushed his hand away.

"Vi, I'm not done." He said, blasting her in the ears. She slapped the wand out of his hand, glaring at him now. Remus started, taken aback. "Vi—"

"Why didn't you tell me?" Violet said in a low, angry voice, green eyes flickering dangerously.

"Violet, it's complicated, okay?" He said tiredly.

"SIX MONTHS." She enunciated, growing a bit louder. "SIX MONTHS, REMUS! Do you have ANY idea how much six months of trying to get over something can hurt!"

"Actually, I do—" He started, but she cut him off, standing up now. He stood up, so as to be ready should she try anything.

"NO! YOU DON'T!" She screamed, kicking the end table and knocking a lamp over.

"Violet Potter, calm down. Now." Remus said seriously.

"Fuck you." She spat, glaring at him harder.

Remus's eyes widened. She had never spoken to him like that. He was at a loss for words at first, then said dangerously, "We'll continue this discussion later." And turned toward his room.

"No! We'll continue this discussion now!" She grabbed his shoulder and yanked him toward her. For a small thing, she was powerful, and Remus spun to face her. Instead of telling her off, he listened while she continued to yell. "ANSWER ME! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!"

He didn't look at her. Enraged, she pushed him, barely knocking him backwards. "I WANTED TO SEE HIM! EVERY DAY I SPENT TRYING TO GET OVER HIS SO-CALLED DEATH AND HE'S BEEN ALIVE! AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME! WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU TELL ME! WHY--!" By this time she had been swinging at him.

Remus caught both her wrists and locked his thumbs to keep her from twisting away as he yanked her forward, inches from his face and he yelled back, "BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW!"

That certainly got her attention and she stopped fighting for a moment. "You didn't know?" She said scornfully. "How am I supposed to believe that?"

"Until a month ago, I knew no more than you." He said, not letting her go. "Until he showed up on my doorstep last month, I was every bit as alone as you, trying to get over the death of one of my oldest and dearest friends. And it was just as much of a shock to me to see him alive as it was for you."

"Why didn't you tell me?" She pressed, tears in her eyes now. "I wanted more than anything to see him and it would have cleared up those dreams I was having also."

"Violet, how could I spring that on you?" Remus said desperately, loosening his hold on her wrists and instead taking her by the shoulders. "You were doing good, it seemed, and you were starting to get over it, I couldn't just rip apart your whole world again."

"Like it didn't rip apart my whole world seeing his face again with no warning, nothing, at three a.m. looking for you?" Violet snapped.

"I wasn't expecting you to come home so early! I had no way of planning, of getting ready, of finding him a place to stay until the time was right. I had to hide him in my room, and even then, you found out."

"Well, I'm sorry I ruined your secret." Violet said shortly, pulling away. Remus grabbed her by the arm and she spun around, ready for a fight.

"Calm down." He said. She stood still, looking at him, waiting. He sighed. "Look, Vi. Be as mad at me as you want. But the godfather who's been dead for six months is in the other room, and he's been dying to see you, no pun intended. Now, you can stay here and scream at me some more. Or you can go talk to him." With that, he let her go.

Violet hesitated, then took a few uneasy steps into Remus's room. Even after the shock wore off, the sight of him still made her stomach weak, knees shaky. He looked up and met her eyes. In a quiet voice, he said, "Sit down?" and moved over a bit on the edge of the bed.

As scared as she was, she sat down next to him and avoided looking at him. After a moment she dared look at him and asked, "Is it really you?"

He said nothing, just looked at her with those shadowy eyes and took her hand. She fought the urge to throw up at knowing that she was touching someone who until about two hours ago she had believed to be dead. His hand in hers let her know everything she wanted to know. "Oh… God… it is you." She breathed.

"Vi…" Sirius said shakily. "I'm sorry. I never wanted this to happen." There were tears in his voice.

"I know. I know." She said gently, wiping the tears out of her eyes with the back of her other hand. "I just… can't believe I'm sitting here with you. I… I thought you were dead… I… I was starting to move on. And, I…" She was sobbing now. "I—I prayed for this every day… and it's still more than I ever imagined."

She was blubbering now and Sirius put a hand on her hair and shed her. "Hey…" he said softly, pulling her toward him. "Come here."

She gladly fell into his arms and started bawling, loudly and uncontrollably, shock now fully wearing off and reaction kicking in.

Somewhere, the sun was rising, a magical war of good and evil was still going on, and The Girl Who Lived was crying on the shoulder of a convicted murderer.

That's it for now yo.