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Dear Diary Moment
Summary: Draco and Ginny were best friends though nobody knows it, they knew each other inside out, but something happened that change their lives forever when Ginny becomes suicidal…
Important:
The one with this (-) is Pansy Parkinson. (BOLD) is Draco and the Italized is Ginny.
Chapter One-I followed Draco… and he doesn't notice me even if I try to make as much noise as possible. I didn't call him because his broad back was rigid and unapproachable.
We entered a cemetery. Then suddenly, he stopped in front of a grave. It was new and shiny and white, as if whoever owned it died just recently. I wonder if he's here to see someone…
Somehow, I still feel Weasley as I sit here. I don't know if I can take whatever's written in this… but I gotta do it. And I'm going to say this only once, Weasley. Help me get through it…
-What the hell!!? He was visiting a Weasley? Why was he? Wait a second. He's looking at something. Hey, that's a diary… I didn't know Draco kept one… maybe I could get a peek. He hates it when I do that…
Listen again, Weasley because this is one of the very rare times I would say this… I'm sorry it took me so long to go here, Weasel. But guess I'm ready now. Here goes nothing…
October 15Life's hell. That's the only summary that I could think of for my sixteen years of existence. Somehow, through all this years I got to survive by making my own world…where everything goes MY way. Well guess what, Ginny. It doesn't. Actually, NOTHING does.
I didn't realize that all the lies and the story I had to make to stay in that fantasy world damaged not just me. I hurt people. A lot of them. I came back to the real world and saw that I almost destroyed friendships and trashed my already ruined reputation.
I know the time will come that all these will backfire one by one. All I can do is wait for the karma, I guess.
Didn't know you feel this way, Weasel. You had always looked so happy with the scarhead and mudblood Granger, and of course you're pathetic freckled brother. Sorry, just can't help calling them that, although I know that you always hated it. But guess what Weasel you're not here, so I really don't care much…
-So this isn't Draco's diary, but Ginny Weasley's diary but what the heck will he be doing with a Weasley's diary especially the girl… This is not what at all I expected… But I do understand the Weasley girl, not everything goes easily in life and sometimes backing out is the easiest way… a coward's way out, but I know that sometimes, there aren't a lot of options either.
This girl's life had been hard. But mine is a lot harder. A lot Harder…
NOVEMBER 17I KNEW this time would come eventually, Sarah and Colin just found out about those rumors I made up about them. They got mad-predictably. I can't justify what I did no matter what, but I can still remember clearly why I did it…
It was those times when the whole world seemed to fight me. I hated school unlike before, my friends, even my closest friend, Draco alienated me, my classmates and teachers despise me, and I had to pretend to my family that everything couldn't be more fun because I don't want them to think I had a problem. But I know I do. I just can't deal with it because I've never felt this way before.
So I did it again; I went back to my make-believe world. And in all of a sudden I came crashing back to reality without even having a timeout to breathe before facing the consequences of flying in a dream.
I thought a lot about the situation and I came up with this: I'm sick. Of my problems, of my school, of my friends, of HARRY-BLOODY-POTTER for making my heart broke into unrecognizable pieces over and over again…Of ME. But maybe this will go away eventually. Maybe I just feel bad.
The only problem is, this bad feeling gets worse.
And that's because I'M at fault. And I'm NOT the victim here.
Damnit Wealsey! YOU should have told me this, from the beginning. You know I couldn't read you that well. You're almost as good as me when it comes to hiding feelings. I could have sworn you were the happiest person in the entire world. And now Weasley, do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to BLAME myself for all this! Because I should have talked to you when I found out the truth, found out what the problem is, and HELPED you. But did I, Draco, even try to? No. I'm a good-for-nothing bastard! As almost anyone I know would say… And now it's-
What do I mean NOW? You don't have nows anymore. It's too late…for both of us.
-I'm really relating to this girl. Wow! Did I just say I'm relating to a Weasley! The girl is just so… I can't explain. It's as if I knew her all along. I mean, everybody must have spent a little of her life as the one who gets hurts and the one who hurts. This girl should have kept her wits to herself.
But then again maybe I should have followed my own advice. Maybe I should have kept MY wits to MYSELF.
I'm finally at the last page. Gin, huh, first time I ever called you that, but anyway, why do I have a feeling that you lied to me all along? I'm your closest friend for pity's sake! You've said it yourself! DO you bloody know that I feel responsible for all of these? I should've told you back to off of other's lives, I should've told you anything to keep you out of all this.
But now all I can do is watch you here. So close yet so far…
-Oh. My. God. Draco's crying?! Draco never cries…all the years I've known him I never saw him show any vulnerability, any unmanly emotion. Now I'm truly amazed by the littlest weasel, she's some girl if she got Draco tearing up.
NOVEMBER 23I…oh what the hell. What I feel doesn't matter now does it? I can't change anything, and I can't right it all. But it doesn't matter…wouldn't it anyway. I'm going away. I'm leaving it all here. I'm leaving all my frustrations, all my heartaches since no one ever loved me back in this world, that I felt I don't seem to matter anymore…
I know you would be reading this mom. I can't stand all those pretenses anymore. You shouldn't be surprised at all. After all, all these problems, as you say, would be worthless by the time I'm out of school…
Well guess what, mom; I'll never be able to wait for that. I'm ending it all HERE. All these problems, these pain, these chaos… YOU survived it. But I can't, mom. I'm not like you. I'm smart academically, but in life I'm zero. I know that now.
And DRACO. My only best friend in this cruel world. I know you must thinks I'm crazy for doing this but you're much better off with life without me. I can't stand being here anymore, I can't stand all these problems, I also can't stand LOVING but being not LOVED, so I guess I'll see you…
Did you know that I LOVE YOU! You never knew that Weasley, huh, Weasley, because you're too busy with your love for stupid Potter! You never looked past the stupid brilliant Potter! If you just at least glimpse at the side of Potter, you could have seen me! You know! You could have seen me, even a little, that I cared for you more than Potter or anyone in this world! But you never looked beyond him, you never looked or at least glimpse, and that's your fault Weasley! It's all your FAULT!
The End
Author Notes: Like it or hate it review please and yeah this is a ONE SHOT FIC! K!