Title: In the End
Author: Crimson Lipstick
Rating: PG –13
Category: Angst/Tragedy
Disclaimer: Hopefully by now you've got the idea that I own nothing.
Summary: Chronicles Rogue's life from the beginning of her downward spiral to her tragic death…
The Toaster: You found the last chapter, really sad? I thought it wasn't sad enough… I'm sorry though, but her death had to come eventually. I personally don't think anything else bad can happen…but read this latest chapter and tell me what you think. Samm16: Wow, aren't I really popular, lol! Thanks for your compliments, though I've kind of based her feelings on personal experiences. You don't like Jean? I think she's okay, but one of the easiest characters to portray as evil in the X-Men universe. Anyway, it's always great to have a brand new reviewer and I hope you like this new chapter. TheDreamerLady: Good writers are dangerous? God, that's put me off reading any more fanfiction for a while, lol. I'm sorry you felt that way, and when I read you review, I suddenly realised I had dedicated the chapter where Rogue actually dies, to you (sorry). But I personally think that's a very important chapter. Anyway, lastly, thanks for all of your reviews. They really helped me, and I hope you review this last chapter :-) Lily: Logan and Rogue are one of my fav couples too, except that it's quite a hard relationship to write about. And no, Kitty is not stupid and there might be a good to why she gave them to Rogue. But hey, thanks for you critical reviews; they make me think and reread my work.
Please review this chapter! If you've read this story before and never reviewed, this is the perfect time! I know a few people who have added me to their favourites or author alerts, yet never reviewed. So, please, REVIEW!!
Yeah, I know I'm sounding desperate, but on with the story...
Epilogue
Katherine Pryde, or Kitty as she was more commonly known, had a serious expression plastered on her face. She sat on the hospital bed and searched through the drawers. It wasn't something she wanted to do. She didn't want to invade Rogue's privacy, but somebody had to do it, and Jean had decided she was best suited. Somebody had to sort through the many possessions and decide what had to go, and what little could remain. Kitty didn't even want to start imagining what it would be like to clear Rogue's side of the dormitory room that they shared. If it were up to her, she would leave it exactly how Rogue had left it. But this was the beginning of a school year, and more and more students kept arriving. More people who had no idea who the hell Marie was.
The funeral would be on Saturday and Kitty wanted this all to be over before then, because only then could she move on. Try as she might, she still felt guilty. It was her scissors that had caused the damage, and she had this queasy feeling that many people still hadn't forgiven her for that. They never said anything, but it was in the way they looked at her. After all, she would never forget Jean's face as she held up the scissors and questioned how they had arrived at the scene. Kitty hoped in time they would understand, but she herself did not.
Had she given the scissors on purpose?
Because even Kitty didn't know the answer to that question. But what she did know was that Rogue was very determined. If Rogue wanted to kill herself, sooner or later she would have succeeded.
With that though in mind, she nodded softly, and continued the horrible task.
And then suddenly, with a jolt, she stopped sorting, as she came across a pale blue book. She vaguely remembered it. Yes, this was Rogue's journal. Kitty moved to put it away but then stopped, and hesitated. Biting her lip, she looked around the empty medical bay and then at the journal again before finally opening it. The first page was blank, but the rest were littered with poems, verses, entries. She only skimmed through these entries and then, on an impulse, turned to the last entry.
She froze, and tucked a strand of hair away. It was easily the neatest entry and the words seemed to fly off the page. In her mind she could hear Rogue's sweet voice, giving the words life:
Dear everyone; Kitty, Jubilee, Logan, Scott, Jean, Storm, Kurt, Bobby, Jamie, Professor and to anyone else I've forgotten.
I don't know wear to start. Though I guess if you're reading this, I'm most probably dead.
I'm sorry. God, I'm so sorry. I know that you will miss me. I know that many of you love me. I'm sorry for the pain you will suffer because of me.
But what about me?
Am I supposed to live a life of torture and misery because you want me alive? Trust me death is better than what my life is. I will be happy now. I know this for a fact.
I couldn't go on. Every day was becoming worse than the one before. Don't you see? I had no choice. Would you have rather wanted me to live a life full of misery?
So don't feel sorry for me. Don't say it was a loss of a life. Because it wasn't. My life was a waste. It had reached the stage where I didn't care whether I woke the next day.
I didn't want it to end like this. But in the end I had no choice. I always thought I would get over this. I thought that the older I got, the less bad it would seem.
I thought wrong.
All of you have wonderful futures ahead of you. I don't want to spoil it for you. Don't feel sad when my name is mentioned. Just think about how happy I am. How lucky you are to love your life. To be free. To be happy.
Time heals all wounds. Time however doesn't heal curses. In time I will become a faint memory. Someone you used to know in a past life.
Live your life. Forget me. Remember me
Because I will never forget get any of you.
I love you.
All of you.
But in the end, it wasn't enough.
In the end.
Love
Rogue
Marie
Kid.
Kitty stopped reading and looked up. For the next few seconds she just stared, a blank look on her face. It was all too unreal...
Finally her emotions let loose and she held a hand to her mouth, and her tears fell openly, smudging the ink. She silently cried, her breaths becoming shorter, and it took awhile for her to compose herself.
Then she took a deep breath and tore the page out, before putting the book in her backpack. .
That page was all they needed to see.
She would keep the book. It was all she had of Rogue left.
In the end.
In the end, all she had was a book.
And that new stereo Rogue had bought her...
THE END
Whoa, four months to write nine chapters, lol! Anyway I'd like to say thanks to everyone who reviewed this story. All those reviews really motivated me, and I think I did pretty well, considering this is my first story. Don't forget to review this chapter, though!
Thanks, again.
Crimson Lipstick