The Most Likely Couple Chapter 3: Part 2: Of Routine, a Redheaded Do’aho, Fate and Fact, a slam dunk fanfic

Disclaimer: Fanfic. By a fan. For fans. Slam Dunk created by great mangaka Takehiko Inoue. This work not at all associated with Takehiko-sama. This work not associated with anime version of Slam Dunk. This piece of fanfiction work belongs solely to Himitsu Star (see Berne Convention and other copyright laws and international treaties).

Warning: This is a yaoi fanfic, which depicts romance and love between males.

Himitsu_Star's Notes: Hi...finally part 2 is out. In midst of writing part 3 now... I'm very, very grateful for the reviews and the encouragement, and the little kicks in the butt I've been getting from people who want to read the next part. ^^;; Although again I have no time to thank everyone by name, believe me that I am extremely indebted to all for the attention given.

There are a number of references in this chapter that are related to the manga. I've also put in a little fictional bit about Rukawa's father. If you guys have watched Cardcaptor Sakura, you'll notice that Kinomoto Touya is really quite like Rukawa Kaede, the silent, super-athlete type, though Touya does show more emotion towards those people he cares for. Anyway, I just decided to borrow one of Touya's father's characteristics for this fic. Maybe I'll get the chance to develop Rukawa senior a little later on.

Also I have borrowed Cardcaptor Sakura's trademarked HANYAAAN. ^_~

P.S. =) Actually I do know Sakuragi sings it as "Ore wa Tensai" but I just wanted to draw it out a little longer and more exaggerated, hence in the previous chapter it came out as "OHHHHH-RAAAAAAAAY...WAAAAAAAAHHH...TEEEEEEE-NNN—SAAAAAAAYEEEE..."

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Title: Most Likely Couple

Rating: PG-13

Part 2: Of Routine, a Redheaded Do'aho, Fate and Fact

Rukawa Kaede had always been a Man of Routine.

Every morning, he woke up at precisely 06:48:03, on the last note of the third "toot-toot-toot-TOOT" of his alarm clock (which was set to go off at exactly 06:48:00).

He would then slam down the "off" button, roll over in bed, go back to sleep for another half an hour, and wake up two minutes before the first bell for assembly rang at his school. The second bell for assembly, the late bell, wouldn't ring for another seven minutes, and that gave Rukawa enough time to gargle his mouth, grab a bite, throw on his uniform, and visit the loo.

Around the time the late bell rang, Rukawa would be on his bike, pedalling at a swift, steady speed down the streets of Shohoku, heading for the high school. He knew the route well enough to be able to catch a few winks on his bike as he cycled along, his favourite music playing in his ears. After all, nothing ever changed on the road he always took; it wasn't as if there was going to be a sudden manhole where there hadn't been one the day before! (Unless Sakuragi Hanamichi had put it there, and Rukawa really wouldn't put it past the red-headed do'aho to do something like that, because things like that always happened when Sakuragi was around, but that was another story...) And Kami-sama watched over him; every car, van and lamp-post that got in his way suffered severe dents, but Rukawa Kaede, his MIDI player and his faithful bicycle rode on, serene, invulnerable and unbeatable.

Rukawa always arrived in time for the first period. His programme called for him to pay some semblance of attention for the first five seconds, and then to sleep through the period, as well as the next three periods, until the bell for break rang.

Break time meant another quick meal in as secluded an area as he could find, and then another nap. He hated crowds, and although he would have liked to make full use of the forty-minute break to practise basketball either in the gym or on the courts outdoors, the net result was he wasn't about to give a one-man public exhibition (especially where the redheaded do'aho would interrupt him and challenge him, and try to snatch the ball, and announce his Tensai-ness to all and sundry, and generally waste Rukawa's precious time). Besides, he needed to avoid the long lines of girls that all seemed equally determined to fight for the chance to present him with a bento of their own making. He was perfectly satisfied with the ones his father always made for him. After break, he did the usual—sleep through the rest of the day until the bell for the end of the last period rang.

Rukawa Kaede's routine after school was just as simple. He played basketball, and he was there to play basketball the best that he could, which is very different from being the best basketball player, and play it he would—and that redheaded do'aho could jolly well dunk himself into the basket if he disagreed. And at night, after the others had left, Rukawa stayed on to play ball in the gym. And he'd practise on, night after night, alone in the school gym, until he was too tired to carry on. But he wasn't playing to be the best basketball player ever.

People always misjudged Rukawa Kaede. Aida Yayoi, the sports journalist who covered Kanagata prefecture for a famous basketball magazine, had once made the error of assuming that Rukawa played for himself. She had never been more wrong. Unlike Kiyota Nobunaga of Kainan Affiliated, Rukawa Kaede was practising to play the best basketball he could, which is a very different thing from being the best basketball player in the world. Neither purpose is antithetical to the idea of being a team player, but nor should the idea of being a team player be allowed to stifle an individual's ability to play his best. Rukawa Kaede had genius, and a dream, and no limit in sight. He worked for that dream and his entire life revolved around it. There was no space for interruptions or things which could cramp his style, e.g. girls... but there was this itsy-bitsy thing called Murphy's Law, and it popped up in the unexpected shape of a red-headed do'aho with a temper as quick and fierce as the chilli-red hue of his hair.

Going by the normal flow of things, Murphy's Law generally started operating around the time the after-school basketball practices began. This one little factor was something Rukawa had dismissively discounted for a little while, like everyone else, but the mosquito was red-headed and loud-mouthed and persistent as only a mosquito can be, and – surprisingly enough—had in him possibly as much raw talent as Rukawa Kaede ever possessed at any one time in his life—not, you know, that Rukawa was going to admit it to the do'aho. After all, the mosquito had once slam dunked a basketball through a hoop whilst Akagi Takenori was attached to the said ball! Yes, Sakuragi Hanamichi, Kami-sama's designated redheaded do'aho, was the big kink in Rukawa's Routine (in the nice, non-hentai manner, folks). Rukawa didn't remember having to mop the floor of the gym so many times before, nor had he ever needed bruise balm so much. At junior high, he had known every inch of the court—and not every inch of the floor of the court. As long as Sakuragi Hanamichi was around, though, it seemed Rukawa would get to know the mop and bucket in far more intimate detail than he could ever imagine, and would also be the highly valued customer of the nearby traditional medicine shop (bruise balm, remember?).

So much for routine, or what was left of it after Sakuragi's chaotic interference.

But today, it was different. Today, right from the start of the day, way before the after-school practices, and long before the redhead made his customary appearance, Rukawa Kaede was having a Most Unusual Day. It could alternatively be described as extraordinary, bizarre or abnormal, but the fact remained that it would be something like another ten thousand years and several reincarnations before he would see the like of it again.

Unusual Fact #1: He woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep.

It was preposterous. It was a travesty. –Actually, it was a sign from the gods that this was going to be the craziest day of his life, but what did Rukawa, mere mortal (except on the basketball court), know about it? To get back to the point, Rukawa started counting bouncing basketballs, but it didn't work, especially when basketballs meant playing basketball, and playing basketball meant red hair, and he could hear the loud voice in his head: "YAHARHARHARHAR!!!! OOOOOOO-REEEEEEEE WA TEEEEEEEEEEEN-SAAAAAAA-IIIIIIII!"

Bouncing basketballs was a bad idea. But he was damned if he was going to count sheep. White frilly animals that went "maaa" did nothing for him. (Neither did redheaded, loud-mouthed do'ahos). But he really couldn't think of anything else...except possibly bouncing do'ahos, and how would that help him sleep, thankyouverymuch...

So he went to school instead. Bright and early. And let's not forget, wide awake. ß-- Abnormal Fact #2.

He did plan to try to catch a nap in the place where he usually slept the most—his desk. But his plans were scuttled as soon as he walked into the hallowed hallways of Shohoku High. There the usual giggles and whispers and nudges and swoons as he walked past, and he ignored them. Or at least, he ignored them until—

"Omigod, Sakuragi is so hot!!!"

"Sugoiiiiii.....*hearts*... Sakuragi-kun..."

"~~HANYAAAN~~SAKURAGI~~HANYAAN~~" ß- Weird Facts #3

Rukawa blinked. Okay, that was weird. There was this stream of little pink hearts which kept drifting in front of him, and then bouncing off his nose with little "piku-piku" sounds, and what was all that Sakuragi this, Sakuragi that? (Peculiar Fact #4)

"Rukawa-san..."

He had never heard his name uttered in such – such reverent tones before. Kinda like those used by priests – or cultists. He blinked many times more. Something like a bunch of females, three wide and four deep (3x4 = twelve of them) – and they were bowing before him like worshippers before some holy idol, complete with outstretched palms and greater-than-ninety-degree bows of supplication. (Oddball Fact #5)

The one at the head of the bunch, a girl with round glasses, determined chin and long plaits, raised her head, eyes glittering, the expression in them devoted, deferential, and decidedly manic.

"We are 100% behind you, O Rukawa-san. May you and your redheaded loved one know peace and joy with our blessing and eternal support!" (Freakish Fact #5)

Like a badly-rehearsed high school musical, the rest of the girls suddenly unbent, snapping to attention, and struck their left breasts with clenched fists before pumping said fists into the air: "We Will Support You For Ever!" (At this point, Rukawa almost sighed with relief. At least he was familiar with this part of the encounter so far).

Then, to add to the bewildered Rukawa's further mystification (and conviction that high school girls were a mutant sort of breed completely alien to the rest of mankind), they parted like the Red Sea before him, giving one final, deeply pious bow.

There was only one reason for all this insanity. Sakuragi Hanamichi. Had to be. No other explanation. After all, Rukawa's Routine got messed up only when Sakuragi was around. All the redheaded do'aho had to do was to sneeze, or even think about kitsunes. Rukawa was quite convinced on that point. The problem was, what was all this about a beloved? A redheaded loved one?!

He had just about made up his mind that the redhead was somehow behind this, either through voodoo or some other equally diabolical means, when he saw IT. (Aberrant Fact #6)

The huge, in-your-eye, how-could-you-miss-it IT.

The IT he couldn't stop himself from staring at.

Long, strongly muscled, golden-tanned limbs sprawled before him in near-naked abandon. Jeans so skin-tight they had to have been poured on to those long, long legs. Jeans cut so low and unbuttoned so that they revealed the breathtaking beginnings of defined hip muscles that trailed teasingly downwards. The powerful, flawlessly tanned torso, with those amazingly broad shoulders, well-developed muscular frame and beautifully sculpted abs. The pale fingers that were tantalisingly entwined with capable, tanned ones, resting casually on the flat, hard stomach, fingers reaching into the unbuttoned jeans...and sultry, passion-filled brown eyes that gleamed with a soft fire that sang of many tempting, sensual promises... (Deviant Fact #7)

"...eeeee! Sakuragi Hanamichi is so sexy!!! *pant* Rukawa Kaede is so sexy! *pant* Eeeeee! I've died and gone to heaven!..."

"*swoon*...Do you really think that he and Rukawa...*giggle*"

Rukawa's right eye twitched just the slightest bit. (Nutty Fact #8)

"...oh, but why not? We always thought they hated each other but all the time they truly, madly, deeply loved each other!!! *giggle*"

Rukawa's left eye began twitching as well. (Unnatural Fact #9)

"*squeal* How romantic! *giggle* They must've been in love for sooooooo long!"

"We disagree! Sakuragi Hanamichi is nowhere near worthy of Rukawa-sama!"

"He is too! He is so sexy!"

"Look at those muscles! I would love to be held in those strong, muscular arms! They're just as strong and sexy and wonderful as Rukawa-san's! Eeee!"

"How dare you insult Rukawa-sama by comparing him to that good-for-nothing red-haired monkey—"

"What, you have no eyes? Sakuragi-san is soooooooooo cool!!! You know nothing!"

Fists flew, hair got pulled and the screams intensified as the squabble became physical. Meanwhile, the crowd in front of the noticeboard started snowballing as more students arrived and came running to gape at the new décor the noticeboard had taken on.

Rukawa Kaede turned away. Whoever had done the picture had given the redheaded do'aho a new hairstyle, one with more hair, but less bouffant hairdo he had sported at the beginning. Sakuragi looked good in this picture, really good, and no doubt that was in part thanks to the hairstyle in the portrait, but— Rukawa quite liked his buzz cut. It was easier to hit the do'aho that way. – Well, he had to be off. He needed to find that classroom and catch a nap—

"OOOOO-HHHHHH-REEEEEEEEEEE WAAAAAAAA—"

Halfway to the classrooms, Rukawa halted. That...hollering. He shot a quick glance in the direction of the frightfully off-tune bellowing. In the distance, he saw the flaming red-topped, muscular pillar of an unmistakeable somebody. Sakuragi Hanamichi, red-haired do'aho, self-aggrandizing, chest-thumping tensai, wannabe rival of Rukawa Kaede (and many, many others), had finally arrived on the scene. And as was usual with Sakuragi's interference, Rukawa's Routine came to a screeching standstill.

Almost automatically, the dark-haired boy changed direction, retracing his steps. He was going to have to hang around the noticeboard a little while longer...