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The Truth

"Harper? Harper it's me...."

Harper, deliriously drunk and depressed gave an incoherent answer. Andromeda opened the door.

"Harper. ..."

Beka picked up an empty bottle and sighed. As Harper went to take another swig she grabbed it and shoved it out of the way with the remaining bottles. Harper was sitting cross-legged on his bunk surrounded by empty bottles and smashed glass. Tears ran down his face unrestrained and the helpless look he wore told Beka that the alcohol had perhaps not had the effect intended, but rather the adverse. She delicately navigated through the piles of things, broken and otherwise, and cleared a space next to him.

"You came."

"Of course I came Harper. Didn't think I'd just let you leave did you?"

Beka sat down next to him. After a few moments of silence, in which Harper focused on clearing his mind a little, Beka glanced at him.

"Harper, I won't let you leave you know."

"Then I'll just die." He slurred.

"You don't mean that. You're drunk."

"True, but it's not like I got anything to lose right now. I mean it's not anything...like I...I got nothing left."

"That's not true, you have me, and Trance, and Rommie..."

"HA! Rommie yeah right, I made her and what does she do in return? Freakin fires me!!"

"Well you have been acting strange lately. I'm not condoning what they did, but ....Seamus what happened on Infinity Atoll?"

"Wha?"

"Infinity Atoll. You know, where you went a few days ago."

"I didn't go to Infinity Atoll...what are you talking about?"

"How much have you had to-"

"I went to Earth!"

"Earth?!"

"Yeah..."

Harper began to sob, hiding his face in his hands. Beka put her hand on his arm but he yelped and leaped away from her.

"What's wrong?"

A struggle ensued, as Beka tried to see the damage. Finally Beka did see, as well as the fading bruises and grazes on his arm, and she stood up.

"Seamus tell me what happened. Why did you go to Earth?"

"It doesn't matter anymore Beka it's too late anyway- I lost everything!"

"Your job isn't-"

"Screw my job! I can get another job! I can't get another cousin. I can't get another Brendan..."

Things fell into place for Beka slowly but surely and she felt empathy for her distraught friend.

"Brendan's...dead?" She checked.

"They're all dead! My entire family is dead!"

"Oh...Seamus I'm so sorry, why didn't you tell me?"

She pulled him into a hug gently.

"I couldn't."

"But where did you get beaten up?"

"Where do you freakin think."

"Ok, Earth, but why?"

"Because I rallied them up to fight ....and then left them. With a freakin hopeless battle and now Brendan's dead because of me."

"But-"

"Along with my parents, and Hohne, and Woody, I don't deserve it Beka! They should have just let me die..."

"It wasn't your fault. And thinking it was won't help, it wasn't your fault you relied on Dylan, and it wasn't Dylan's fault he couldn't make it in time, it was just something that happened. I'm sorry that Brendan's dead, but I know he wouldn't blame you Seamus."

"I know he wouldn't."

"Do you feel guilty?"

"A little...

"I've been pretty impatient with the crew haven't I?" he said with slow deliberation.

"Impatient? You've been angry as hell for the past few days, but once Dylan knows why he'll give you your job back. You shouldn't be angry with yourself."

"I'm not angry at myself..." he muttered quietly, guiltily.

Beka caught on almost immediately. Crouching down she looked Harper in the eye. She saw the hesitant look of doubt on his face.

"I get it now." She said sadly.

Harper looked back at her.

"Seamus listen to me, it's ok to be mad at Brendan."

"I'm not mad at Brendan! How could I be- it's my fault he's dead..."

She gave him a look, a look that suggested she didn't believe him. He carried on.

"Even though.... I gave him the chance to come with me..." he choked on his words and looked up at her with tear-filled eyes.

"He could have come with me Beka!! He could have..."

Picking up an empty beer bottle he threw it against a wall.

"Why didn't you come with me?!! You'd still be alive! How could you leave me like that? How could you be so selfish? Now there's no one left but me! Now I'm all alone Brendan! How could you leave me alone?!!"

For not the first time during this conversation, Beka was glad Harper was drunk. He might never have said those things were he sober.

"Seamus, I'm here."

He looked at her in confusion.

"You're not alone. I'm right here."

Seamus hung his head slightly, embarrassed at his outburst. She lifted his head.

"I'm here, and tomorrow I'll be here, when we go and get your job back. And right now, we're going to see Trance, because this wound is infected."

She helped him to his feet, and they made their way to med-deck, ignoring the strange looks they got, to Trance who was waiting for them. She told Beka to go and tell Dylan everything, then set to work. Harper yawned and remembered the small fact that he was exhausted, the alcohol hadn't helped. Trance made him lie down.

"Where's Beka?"

"She's gone, but she'll come back."

"But-"

"Harper, I'm here too you know."

"...but...how do you....Did you?"

"You're drunk Harper."

"Ha! Not that drunk..." he slurred.

Trance smiled slightly as he fell into a drunken slumber.

The End.