Author's Note: No duh, I don't own Degrassi. Okay, this story is rated R for self-destructive behavior and drug use. It's about Ellie and her life, blah blah blah. But it's short. Very short.
RED ROSE
I'm nothing more than a jealous girl.
I'm a jealous girl who causes harm to herself.
I've never had a stable home life. Mom wouldn't have a drink until Dad would leave, and he left a lot. But she kept it together around him. My father is an OCD soldier, and he's rarely ever home. When he is, he's either snorting coke from my handheld mirror or hitting Mom. He leaves the bags of coke on the coffee table, and I can normally get three lines' worth before he notices anything. Pathetic, right?
((A/N: OCD Obsessive Compulsive Disorder))
I made three perfect lines on my mirror. Then I looked down. Holy crap, I'd never been so nervous. I was fourteen and my dad had just shown me how to make perfect lines. Being OCD comes in handy, eh? He was leaving for Ghana the next day and wanted me to try it before he left. So I did. I snorted the first line. Holy shit, it burned, which made my eyes water. I did the next two with ease, then felt myself calm down. "Good job, Ellie," Dad said, taking the mirror.
Then, almost two years later, I abandoned drugs and went to physical harm. I started cutting, almost every day. Then Paige found out. Oh, gawd that sucked.
I'm failing all my classes. I wanted to be a psychologist, too.
Hopefully those red roses can teach me better.
Those red roses I've depended on for so long. The ones etched in my wrists.
"Well," you say, "we made loads of improvement today.
I nod.
"Ellie, you're twenty now. Get over the past," you tell me.
"Doctor, it's not that simple!" I cry.
I return that night to my cluttered apartment, which I share with Sean, to take my razor and watch the roses bloom.
Roses. My red roses are
Beautiful.