Authors note: I would have gotten this fiction posted a lot sooner, but some of the reviews for chapter one made it necessary to radically reform much of both chapters. That means that chapter one has been revamped adding nearly 1000 words. By the way I'm still looking for anyone interested in pre-reading. Contact me at if you are interested.
Disclaimer: Still don't own Eva or its characters. Oh so many perfectly good cars gone uncrunched, bummer.
"Speaking out loud"
'Thinking internally'
Through the Mind of One
by: brindani
Chapter 2
(Nerve Central)
Misato paced back and forth while both Shinji and Rei stood at attention before her. Shinji's eyes quietly followed Misato's progressive laps while Rei stared straight ahead not bothering. Finally, Misato stopped and turned towards the two pilots.
"Where is Asuka!?"
"Well… she kind of got into a small fight at school and left the room in a bit of a rage." Shinji timidly replied
Misato agitation grew as several new reports came in indicating the angel's continued presence.
Misato sharply turned to the command crew. "Send a team to the school to locate the Second as fast as possible."
After her short bark of a command she forced herself to calm down at this unexpected turn of events. She then returned her gaze to the two present pilots pausing a second before continuing.
"The15th angel has remained stationary in the upper atmosphere since it moved into a synchronic orbit above us. I want Shinji to go up alone to investigate the possible dangers first. You are not to…"
Gendou abruptly cut her off. "Belay that order. Unit 01 will stay in cryofreeze. Unit 00 will go up to investigate the situation."
Misato turned to the commander slightly perturbed at his unexpected interference.
"Yes, sir" Misato replied before turning back to the pilots "Rei, you are not to engage unless I order it. Remain as evasive as possible. Understood?"
While Misato spoke, Rei stood straight with her head held high. "Yes, Major" Rei replied crisply before turning smartly to head towards her Eva.
Shinji watched her retreating form for several seconds before turning back to Misato. "Ahhh…What about me?"
Misato looked at him briefly before darting her head quickly towards the commander and back.
"Stand by in Unit 01 in case of an emergency."
"Ok."
Shinji departed for his own Eva showing none of the confidence Rei demonstrated.
Several tense moments past as people rushed around, efficiently getting things ready. Misato lightly taping her foot as she became impatient.
"Is Unit 00 ready, yet?"
"Activation is commencing. It should be ready to launch in 2.3 minutes." Maya replied absently as her fingers danced across the keyboard, attempting to finalize the activation
"Good, launch Unit 00 when activation is complete."
"Yes, ma'am."
Rei felt the familiar jerk as her Eva was roughly routed to one of the various exit ports located throughout the city. Coming to the surface her first concern was to locate the enemy. She swiveled around in a large circle finally orienting on a small light she could barely see far above her through the downpour of rain. Her orientation took just a little too long as a piercing white light suddenly stabbed through Unit 00 turning Rei's world black.
(Rei's mind)
When she opened her eyes, Rei found herself in a cozy little bedroom. A little girl, seemingly about six or seven years old, sat on a neatly made bed pulling her socks on with a grand smile playing across her face. Her mellow brown eyes seemed to flash everywhere with a hint of amusement and joy. Her shoulder long hair held a rich display of bright blond curls that cascaded down her back.
Rei felt disoriented by the sudden change in scenery. "What is this?" She directed her question to the girl. The girl, however, continued with her shoes as if she hadn't heard Rei.
Rei reached out to lightly tap the child on the shoulder but found that her hand went straight through as if through thin air. Rei was not often confused but the current situation totally puzzled her.
"How absolutely delightful." The abstract voice seemed to come from no where. The light amusement that coated it unsettled Rei slightly.
"Who is there?"
"But a humble angel."
"An angel? You are the one attacking the city?"
The angel didn't seem to take note of her latest question.
"Now who is this little one?" after a short pause he continued. "Do you not remember her? She was once someone very dear to you. Oh how tantalizing." The voice seemed to hold a dark relish about the whole situation.
A different voice then penetrated the air. "Sara, you'll be late for school if you don't hurry."
The little girl's head shot up and her smile widened even further.
Gracefully, the child bounced off the bed before bounding out the door. "I'm coming, I'm coming." She gleefully cried out in a sing song voice.
Rei was amazed at the confidence and excitement that seemed to permeate the child. She didn't have long to consider this uncharacteristic enthusiasm as her body drifted after the child, it was very disconcerting to Rei as it became apparent she had no control to stop her movement.
Sara ran up to a middle aged women, obviously the child's mother given the heavy resemblance, especially their beautiful locks, and hugged her as the women swept the precocious child up and around while they both laughed.
After a several good twirls the mother lightly brought the child back down to the ground squatting besides her. "Now be a good girl today and remember to have fun at school." she finished by lightly taping the child's noise which sent her into another fit of giggles.
"Oh so very touching." The angelic voice seemed to come from behind her. When she turned around no one was evident there.
"Why are you showing me this?"
"Patience, Patience." It said with deepening amusement.
The Scene before her flashed. Rei now hovered near the ceiling watching Sara as she sat on a chair with her feet kicking lightly back and forth. Sara's mother sat in the seat next to her. They now appeared to be in a principles office.
The principle was a big man with a bushy mustache and a slight weary expression. He glanced out into the hall where seven other sets of parents waited semi-patently to find out the reason for being called in. After a tired sigh he turned back to his current guests. "I've received a call from a local agency requesting some testing be done with the children of this school, Ms…" The principle quickly glanced at the folder currently laid out before him. "…Tokara."
Ms. Tokara looked suspicious at such a request. Her daughter was her world, as far as she was concerned, and she would not allow anything to happen to her if she could help it.
"What kind of testing?"
The resigned look as well as a slight roll of his eyes showed that he had had to deal with this reaction far more times then he really wanted to contemplate at the moment.
"It seems that the agency is collecting data for a study on children's health. More specifically for the Kindergarten classes though they have shown interest in the first graders as well. From what I can gather they have hired some of the best known doctors in the country to administer the evaluation. The results from these tests would, of course, be dually given to the parents." This was obviously a selling point due to the low end district that the school resided in. Getting up and walking around his desk he proffered several pages neatly stapled together. When Ms. Tokara glanced hesitantly at the forms he continued.
"This is not school sponsored so it is necessary to have a release form signed by all of the participating parents." He noticed Ms Tokara wavering so he tried one more tactic to try and get onto the next set of overtly anxious parents. "Off hand, it sounds like a very good deal given that an equivalent examination would likely cost several thousand dollars."
Ms. Tokara hesitated with a fountain pen in her right hand held above the small x. Glancing up one last time at the pudgy man she finally signed with a quick and neat flourish.
"I do expect all results that are found."
The man closed his eyes wishing that he didn't have to be the one to get all these blasted forms signed. 'Damn bureaucrats'. While outwardly he tried to reassure the women
"Of course, all results will be forwarded to you immediately upon completion."
The last word was hardly out of the principle's mouth before the scene blurred away to reformed near what appeared to be an entry plug.
"What are the results for this one?" Rei turned at the familiar voice to find a rather young Gendou sitting on a chair leaning forward with his hands held before him as was his typical custom. Dr. Fuyutsuki stood to the left of the seated figure with his hands behind his back and a bored expression crossing his face. To the right stood a slightly more enthusiastic Dr. Naoko Akagi.
"My God, this isn't possible." Rei turned back forward to see who had spoken. Several unfamiliar people sat at various terminals. Rei found it odd that she didn't know any of them. She was fairly certain she knew all of NERV's current personal.
"Continue" a slightly annoyed tone touched Gendou's voice forcing the crewmen back to the present.
"Oh, sorry sir, but her sink ratio… it seems to be at 57%!"
Gendou smiled lightly under his hands before muttering quietly "Perfect". Rei only barely heard him as she stood directly in front of his seat. She doubted even the other two people standing on either side of him were aware of his soft spoken response.
As fast as it appeared the smirk vanished before Gendou issued his next order. "Send this one on to training. Continue to the next child."
(Just outside the test plug)A NERV officer Approached Sara as she fiddled with the tiny hair clips they had given her before she went into the funny capsule. The soldier's statement came out in a clipped military fashion.
"Follow me, I shall escort you to your new quarters."
Sara momentarily stopped playing with the clips to glance at the soldier with her head tilted to the side just slightly.
"You mean you'll be taking me back home to my mommy?"
The NERV officer not accustomed to others balking at his orders immediately frowned. "No, you will now be residing here."
Sara's face curved down into a frown of her own 'This clown needs to get things straight.'
"I'm not staying here. The principle himself said I would be coming straight home after the tests."
Being a long time drill instructor, the NERV officer visibly puffed up at the child's insolent tone and willfulness. To show her what he thought of her display he reached out to make a grab for her.
"Enough of this, if you won't come willingly then I'll make you."
He wasn't quite quick enough as Sara brushed by his hand. Her sudden movement lended strength to her heel as it smashed down hard on his toes. Her task accomplished Sara sprinted down the hall towards a close T intersection.
"Why that little piece of …"
The rest of his sentence faded as his face paled with the realization of just what would happen to him if he lost the child. With several horrible images running through his mind he decided it would be best if he ignored the stabbing pain still shooting through his foot to chase after her. When he got to the intersection, he was startled to find no one in either hallway.
'The kid couldn't possibly have run that fast.'
He then noticed two doors marked men and women respectively fairly close to the side he had seen her take. An idea started to form.
'The little twerp must have ducked into the women's bathroom thinking I wouldn't go in there. Well I'm coming in whether she likes it or not.'
He stormed into the bathroom methodically knocking open every stall along each side. By the end he found that each was empty. Cursing silently to himself, he grabbed his radio from his belt to report in.
"The child has escaped; send a search party to sector six immediately."
Rei watched the NERV officer's antics as she hovered high above the bathroom stall he had just vacated. She was slightly stunned that she was now privy to people's mental thoughts. She almost didn't notice as her body drifted to the right into a wall leading straight into the men's bathroom.
As with the Women's bathroom she didn't see any occupants, at first. At least not until her body intersected a small ventilation shaft on the far wall. There sat Sara ear held against the wall listening intently to the violent cursing of the soldier retreat into the background.
When the sound disappeared Sara sat down for a second with a scornful face
'That pathetic loser; he thought I would be so stupid as to simply stay in one of the women's stalls and expect him not to look for me there?'
Rolling her eyes once she started crawling along the duct so quietly that it belied her incredible speed. As she moved along, she past regular vents where she both saw and heard her would be pursuit who remained oblivious to her immediate presence. Soon, she left them far behind as she entered the next section.
"This Sara is very intelligent for her age." Rei remarked as she saw an escape plan begin to form in the back of Sara's mind. It was also obvious that she was observant, as her plan oriented on reaching a duct she had noticed on her way in that would be just out of sight from the main gate. Once there she knew she would be able to get home without being found.
Sara's mouth turned up slightly. 'Especially if the pursuit is this stupid.'
Despite the enclosure and continuous twists and turns Sara's inherent sense of direction told her she was heading in the right direction. She felt immensely relived when the regular passages ceased and it became evident that she was now in the ground still heading straight towards her target.
She stopped near the exit listening closely for any potential presences that may find her when she emerged. After five silent minutes of nothing she carefully lifted up the lid to poke her little head out. That was about as far as she got before a white glove grabbed her arm, roughly pulling her up into the air. Gendou stood before her with not a hint of emotion. Sara desperately tried to divert his attention by kicking any and everywhere but not one landed as he held her at arms length like a piece of feted garbage.
Rei once again felt the angel's presence coalesce in the background.
"Do you still not remember this little one?"
"I have never seen her before. How could I know her? I have yet to see myself here."
Angel laughing silently
"Don't worry you are going to make your appearance soon. Then perhaps you will see how important she once was to you."
The scene abruptly blurred reforming into a small observation room where both Gendou and Fuyutsuki stood looking into a small drab cell. Sara, on the other side of the window, was obviously seeking any weak point she could use to escape.
Fuyutsuki watched the child as she took out the primary camera.
"Quite feisty, this one. She seems ill-suited for your purpose. Do you plan to let her go?"
Gendou placed his hands intertwined just before his face
"No, I think she can be … taught to behave."
Fuyutsuki spared a look of disgust towards his long time friend.
"You don't mean…?"
"Do not trouble yourself with this. She is too important to simply let go."
The scene blurred away to reveal Sara, duck taped hand to foot and predominately across the mouth, being carried forcibly up the steps of her home.
She didn't understand. 'Are they letting me go? If so it's about time. I have important friends to meet.' When the agents broke down her front door her hopes vanished. Of every possible scenario she had imagined none began this way.
Two agents scurried inside while the third, that held her, took small deliberate steps to follow. By the time they had reached the front living room she could see the other agents forcibly holding her mother's struggling form. Sara's eyes widened as her captor withdrew a gun slowly waving it in front of her face before tilting it down directly at her mother. A silent bullet suddenly stilled Ms. Tokara's movements. Sara looked on in horror before a great anguish built deep inside her straining to be realized into a scream of utter despair.
The scene blurred away to Sara in the same drab cell as before. She was still duck taped except for the mouth. Unlike last time, however, she sat listlessly. Her eyes, that once held so much passion, where now drab and dead to the world around her.
Gendou's voice resonated slightly through the chamber.
"What is your name?"
When Sara did not immediately respond a jolt of electricity shot through her
"Sara Tokara." Sara blurted out.
"Incorrect, that is a person's name. You are no longer a person. You are nothing, meaningless. Your name shall be… Rei, Rei Ayanami.
In the real world, moments after the angel's assault, Rei awoke screaming.
"How could you? You killed her, you destroyed my world." Rei didn't know exactly where the words came from, but knew it was somewhere in the far recesses of her mind.
Gendou's reply did not hold comfort against her latest revelation.
"Increase pressure to Unit 00's capsule. The pilot has been contaminated."
Just before Rei once again lost consciousness she heard one last thing.
"Unit 01, proceed to Terminal Dogma, I shall direct you."
(Rei's mind)
Rei found herself curled in a ball crying streams of tears in the black void that now enveloped her.
"It's a lie. It has to be a lie. I...I have always been myself" the usual certainty in her voice was wavering heavily.
The last thing Rei wanted to hear was exactly what she heard next as the Angel laughed darkly
"Oh, that's the wonderful thing about your puny little minds. The truth they hold is far more devastating then anything I could ever come up with."
"No, you must be lying. You said that I wasn't present."
"Of course you weren't present. You where not born until that bullet fired."
Rei dissolved into another fit of racking tears as his words drove home
"Now, now we have hardly begun our little journey of discovery." The angel spoke in a false comforting tone.
Rei desperately tried to stop it, but the background blurred anyway until they were once more in the sync testing room. She saw the same figure as before sitting inside the tube. Nothing physical had changed about the child but her eyes, her eyes held no light. They sought only to accomplish the next task placed before her.
"What are the results?" Gendou's emotionless voice inquired.
The bridge crewmen twitched due to his nervous state but eventually manage to reply.
"Uhhh, Her sync ratio now seems to be only at about .001%."
Gendo's eyes hardened
"Redo the test."
"Yes, sir"
Gendou turned to the doctor standing behind him.
"Suggestions?"
The doctor looked thoughtfully at the capsule for a second before replying
"Wellllll, if the subject's physical composition where closer to that of the Eva she should be able to sync more efficiently."
"Is this a possibility?"
"I have been leading some very experimental research involving genetic splicing but all the results on the animal test subjects thus far have been both inconclusive and extremely painful."
"Inconsequential, proceed immediately after the testing" Gendou's uncaring reply left some of the bridge crew shivering.
"Yes sir! And? About latter tonight?"
One of Gendo's eyebrows cocked along with a smirk well hidden behind his folded hands
"Everything shall be as we arranged."
A small anticipating smile developed on the young doctor's features.
"Yes, sir."
(Dark and Creepy lab)
The young child's limp body lay strapped onto a cold metallic table with several tubs sticking out in various places.
"Proceed." Gendou's order seemed to revibrate in the small chamber.
Without a verbal response the switch was flipped and a viscose fluid snaked its way to the prone figure. Mere seconds after entering, the dead stare gracing the body flickered as an onslaught of pain ran through her entire being.
Rei watched on in fascinated horror, as time seemed to accelerate. Despite the time adjustment that loud resounding screech of agony was ever present. Changes started to occur little by little. The deep healthy tan the girl previously sported started to recede into a pale white complexion. The glorious blond curls slowly streamlined turning a pale light blue. Those light brown eyes shifting to blood red.
Rei shook herself as she could no longer deny that the person before her was her.
The Angel seemed very amused at her realization.
"I see you recognize the striking resemblance. I can't wait to see what happens next."
Everything blurred
(Sync testing room)
"What are the current results?" Gendou sat stoically in his chair as he issued the command.
The bridge crewmen read off the information in a fast precise manner.
"It seems that the subject is now hovering near 3.4%."
Gendou was not happy. He took off his glasses, a rarity few have lived through, and leveled a piercing stare at the doctor.
"Well?"
The doctor managed to sound not nearly as frightened as she truly felt. She also felt slightly relieved that her pants hadn't undergone a slight coloration change, at least not yet.
"I think that it takes more then simple composition to synchronize with one of the Evas. Judging from the data collected on the subject thus far there seems to be a heavy emotional component."
"Explain." His request was not a question.
Seeing that she might live to see another day if she managed to hold herself together for just a little longer the doctor continued at a faster pace.
"When the subject achieved her initial high level sync ratio her personality seemed to be far above normal standards for her age group. It could be that this played a significant role."
"Suggestions."
"If she were to become more emo…"
"If she were to become more emotional, doctor, she would turn on me."
Absentmindedly taping her chin with the pen she held, her mind scoured every possibility to find the one that may yet save her.
"If she didn't remember anything …"
"Can her memories be selectively purged?"
"No, but we can, however, place several strong memory blocks."
"And they will hold?"
"With the correct medications the memory blocks should remain firm indefinitely. Of course, in her present state it will be necessary to retrain her to her emotions."
Gendou turned away from the now relieved Doctor towards his own thoughts
'This is too delicate a matter to let others handle. I shall have to take care of it personally.'
"Now isn't he caring? If I didn't know bett… No! Not the lance! Not nowwwwwww…" The Angel's voice abruptly cut off.
Rei felt the angel's spiritual presence vanish. With it gone everything blacked out returning her to oblivion.
(Dark Room)
Rei fought desperately against the walls of darkness that blanketed her mind. She slowly managed to struggle her way back to reality. As she became semi-conscious she began to hear voices in the background. One she knew all to well as Gendou while the other sounded like Ritsuko's.
"Can the memory blocks be reinstated?"
Rei heard several pages ruffle as if Dr. Akage was apparently trying to determine the answer.
"It looks like we may be able to tenuously reinstate them, but the angel did a thorough job of obliterating the present ones. If it had had a couple more minutes we would have been unable to even reestablish a rudimentary block."
"Will it hold until she is needed?"
"If we were to double the medications and make sure she is not stimulated in subjects resembling the blocked memories it should remain stable."
"Very well, proceed."
Rei's mind began to recede with this last exchange. 'No, they are mine, my memories…'
End Chapter 2
Post-authors note: Sorry about the dark atmosphere in this one. It just worked too well into my plot line. Don't worry this is as bad as it should ever get. Anyway, I appreciate any reviews so that I can sharpen my writing. Please keep negative comments in the realm of constructive criticism. I'd also like to hear what you thought was interesting or good about this section.
Thanks,
brindani