Chapter 24
Isabelle became vaguely aware of footsteps near her, but she easily tuned them out as they faced away. She sniffled loudly, which alerted Severus to someone's presence in the dungeons. He crept around the room, wondering who on earth would hide in his dungeon classroom?
"Oh, Isabelle. What are you doing here?"
Her bloodshot eyes looked up at him briefly, but quickly returned to staring at the floor. "I don't want to talk about it."
"You can talk to me about anything, I swear." He sat down uncomfortably beside her on the cold, hard ground.
Where have I heard those words before? she thought miserably. Oh, yes. Last week, with Sirius in Dover. As soon as she thought his name, she broke down in loud sobs.
"Hey, what is it? Is it Remizov?"
She shook her head no. "I can't tell you. The last time I did something you disapproved of, you didn't talk to me for years."
"Which was an immature, petty mistake that I will regret for the rest of my life. What did you do?" he asked gently.
"I spent last week with Sirius," she whispered. "I'm so sorry."
She covered her head with her hands, expecting Severus' yelling, knowing what he was going to say. That she should've known better than to become involved with him, that it was obvious that Sirius didn't love her. And, that she deserved to be called a tramp.
Severus studied her for a minute. It was clear to him that this relationship had ended very, very badly. And, by the looks of her, she'd already put herself through enough misery. Her hair was damp, streaky, and hung down in her face haphazardly. When she uncovered her eyes, he saw that her face was swollen and puffy.
No, she doesn't need a lecture from me, he decided. "What happened?"
"W-we-well--" she spat out hysterically.
"Hey, let's start at the beginning, ok?" She managed to nod affirmatively. "Let me get this straight. You spent the week with Sirius Black?"
"In my old house in Dover."
"Ok, are you still with him?" She collapsed in body-shaking crying fits. "I'll take that as a no. Did he end things?"
"Yes."
"Did he give you a reason?"
Isabelle took a deep, calming breath, and briefly repeated her argument with Sirius. Well, as much of it as she could remember.
"Is anything he said true?" Severus asked, knowing the answer. He just wanted her to stand up for herself a bit.
"Of course not. Do I have a sign on my forehead saying, 'Hi, I'm a tramp,' or something?"
"No. You made a poor choice a long time ago, and Black was completely out of line to use it against you."
"But, I did choose to be with Malfoy," she pointed out.
"I don't think you had a choice, Isabelle. And, I honestly think Lucius knew that you were vulnerable and took complete advantage of you."
"He saved my life."
"Your reaction is exactly what I'm talking about. Have you ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome?"
"No."
At least she isn't crying anymore, Severus thought thankfully. He conjured up a blanket, which he wrapped around her shaking frame.
"Thank you," she said gratefully.
"You're welcome." He paused. "I'm trying to think of the best way to explain it to you. It's named after this really famous bank robbery in Stockholm, Sweden. There were some hostages, and eventually they refused to be released, or testify against the robbers. Basically, they came to sympathize with their captors."
"But, what does that have to do with me?"
"You're a textbook case, Isabelle. Remizov threw you into Azkaban, and Malfoy talked him into letting you out. What happened next? You were taken to Malfoy's house, the known friend of your abusive husband. Could you leave the house?"
"No."
"Did you feel like Remizov or Malfoy wanted to kill you, or might kill you at any time?"
"Yes," she answered in a barely audible voice. "But, Lucius was nice to me."
"You just think he was, but look at it logically. All he did was throw out some token niceness to you every now and then. Just like Remizov did. But, you tried your hardest to please them just to stay alive. That's what Stockholm Syndrome is."
"I couldn't die. Harry needed me."
Severus wrapped his arms around Isabelle, who felt as fragile as a bird. "I know he did. What I'm trying to tell you, perhaps not very well, is that it isn't your fault that Remizov hurt you. And, your affair with Malfoy was a natural, common reaction to being in a life-threatening situation. It happens all the time."
"Really?" A small ray of hope flashed in her eyes.
"Really. But, you managed to overcome all that on your own. You left both of them, for good. No one made you. You just picked up and left."
"I did, didn't I?"
"Yes, you did." He smiled at her. "Which means that Black's completely, totally wrong about what happened back then. Alright, since we're proving him wrong about your relationships one at a time, let's keep going in reverse order, shall we?"
"Sure." Isabelle was actually starting to feel a little better about herself.
"Which brings us to Phillip Spence, who we can both agree is the only functional relationship that you've ever had. He's a good guy, and a good friend."
"The best. What would've been worse – admitting the truth about Sirius, or marrying him just to have him find out later? I thought I was doing the right thing."
"You did do the right thing. And, just because y'all stayed friends doesn't mean you're with him now."
"Exactly."
"Ok, on to Patil. What were you doing with him yesterday?"
Tears welled up in the corners of Isabelle's big, hurt eyes. "When I went home yesterday morning, I overheard Sirius talking to Remus. And, Sirius said that I meant nothing to him. Which upset me, of course, so I ran to my office where I could be alone to throw a pity party in peace."
She took a deep breath before continuing. "Well, right before I got to my office, I bumped into Andrew. He asked what was wrong, and I just said that I was having a rough day. Then, I told him that Bill's at Phillip's house for a while. They're like twins separated at birth or something."
"I bet," Severus laughed.
"Well, Andrew and Bill used to be pretty good mates. But, they had a fight fifth year, and haven't spoken since, even though they both worked at Gringotts' bank. So, I convinced Andrew to go over there and mend some fences. Before he left, I gave him a hug for good luck. I guess that's what Sirius saw."
"Probably."
Isabelle gazed off in the distance for a minute, then looked back at Severus. "He said I was worthless. And do you know what the horrible thing is? Sirius is absolutely right. I've lived my entire life for him, and he made it pretty clear that he doesn't want me. So, everything I've ever done has no purpose or value. I'm useless."
She buried her head in his shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably. Severus held her for a minute, letting her cry out her anguish. Never, even when Lily died, had he ever seen her this broken. She was right of course – she built all her hopes and dreams around making Sirius Black happy, just for him to reject her efforts.
After a few minutes, she looked up at him. Her spirit, that fire in her eyes, was gone. That determined attitude to go on despite everything was gone as well. It was as if a little piece of her soul died, never to return. At that moment, Severus wanted to strangle Sirius for what he did to Isabelle. Couldn't he see what he meant to her?
That's what I'm afraid of, Severus admitted to himself. Either Isabelle is some flavor of the month to him, or he truly does love her. And I of all people certainly know what extremes Black will go to get the woman he wants.
Severus' eyes narrowed angrily. And if he wants her, then of course he'll come begging and pleading for Isabelle to forgive him. Naturally, she'll forgive him, which is the worst thing she could do in Severus' opinion. He sighed. He wanted Isabelle to be happy, but being with Sirius Black simply isn't healthy for her. But, he didn't know how to bring up the topic without sending her back into his arms. Very carefully, he decided.
"Isabelle, you are not worthless," he said with conviction, passing her a handkerchief.
"Thank you," she sniffled, blowing her nose loudly. "On top of everything else, I caught a terrible cold in Dover. My sinuses are killing me. Anyway, you don't have to lie to cheer me up."
"I'm not lying. Have I ever lied to you?"
"No."
"Isabelle, for starters, I couldn't imagine my life without you. I wouldn't have a job, for starters."
"That's true," she said in a small voice.
"And, you're a wonderful, funny, caring person. Your students adore you. Isabelle, remember at the beginning of the year, when you had the choice to come out of hiding or not?"
"Yes." She blew her nose again, in between sneezing fits.
"Didn't you say that you'd teach Harry no matter what Black chose to do?" She nodded. "So, obviously you have a purpose here. Your nephew still needs you."
"Yes, he does." She sighed. "Which means that I need to pull myself together and get past my messed up life. For him, if for nothing else."
"What are you going to do about Black?" Severus held his breath, waiting for her response. She bit her lip thoughtfully.
"Exactly the same thing I was planning to do before he showed up at Dover," Isabelle decided.
"Which was?"
"To get over him and move on with my life."
Severus could only stare at her, completely stunned. Never, in a million years, would he ever expect to hear those words come out of Isabelle Evans' mouth. This is going to be a lot easier than I ever imagined, he thought gratefully.
"Wh-what?" he said, stupefied.
"Yes," she replied sadly. "You're right. I have so much work to do; we're in a war here! There are far more important things to deal with than my sordid love life."
"It hurts, doesn't it?"
"Like a living death. Oh, why doesn't he want me?" she screamed. Her voice echoed through the dungeon classroom, and into the hallway. "What's so wrong with me?"
"Nothing," Severus said soothingly.
"Are you sure?"
"Absolutely positive." He put his arm around her. "Let me see here. Black turned down a woman who has a doctorate in chemistry and modeled for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Not to mention that whole human pretzel thing." She swatted at him. "Thanks for always being there for me, Sev. I really mean that. And, thank you for not saying I told you so."
"No problem. Hey, why don't you take the day off?"
"I just might. My Muggle Studies kids are supposed to be in the lab today, anyway." She looked at the clock. "Sirius usually leaves the house by now, so I won't have to deal with him. I could really use a bubble bath and some food. Grits, I think. And chocolate chip cookies."
"Hominy grits and chocolate chip cookies?" Severus wrinkled his nose at the combination.
"Yes. Sounds divine right about now. Dobby makes these wonderful double chocolate chip cookies that are the size of small dinner plates, and they just melt in your mouth. I could eat a dozen of them," she said hungrily.
Severus looked at her like she had suddenly been possessed by an alien life being. Not only was she talking about getting over Sirius Black, she was obsessing over food. After Isabelle gave him a quick hug and rushed out of the room, he shook his head violently to clear it. Today was already off to an interesting start.
-----
"I'm serious, Harry.""Serious about what?" he replied, distracted. Hermione looked up from her stack of outlines, incredibly annoyed.
"Do you ever hear a word I say?"
"I thought you weren't supposed to talk in the library," he reminded her. She was just a little too stressed about the O.W.L. tests, in his opinion. Besides, he really hadn't heard her, and didn't want to admit it.
"Prat." She closed her Arithmancy textbook, sighing. "I can't believe we have less than two months to study. I feel so incredibly unprepared."
"Then there's no hope for the rest of us," Harry muttered underneath his breath.
"What I was saying, is that I'm tired of all this drama. I feel like I'm living in the middle of a Muggle soap opera."
"In other words, you're sick of fighting with Ron. Welcome to the club. Might I remind you that I have to hear it from both of you?"
"Sorry." She truly looked contrite. "I'm just confused. I mean, look over there. He's at that table, surrounded by those Ravenclaw girls. What am I supposed to think about that?"
Harry looked across the room. "Maybe he's studying for the O.W.L. tests?"
"Do I have gullible written on my shoe? I thought not. See, that's the thing about Viktor. He's completely straightforward."
"Probably because he's been hit by one too many stray Bludgers. Krum's not your type."
"At least he's dependable."
"Boring, you mean. I never would've pictured you with a half brain-dead Quiddich star."
"I'm sitting here with you, aren't I?" she replied with an evil grin. He stared at her sourly, trying to think of a comeback.
"Anyway, I'm really sick of staring at Ron and those Ravenclaw bimbos," Hermione said cattily. "They're not even pretty. Look at Caitlin with that stringy hair. Hasn't she heard of hair gel? And Vanessa with that hideous purple eye shadow. She looks like someone gave her a black eye. Oh, and Amanda. There are too many fashions sins to even mention."
"I think they're pretty cute."
"Harry, I seriously think you need to get your eyes checked."
"Probably do. I'm stuck looking at you most of the day."
"Cute, Potter. So, are you ready to go back to the dorm?" Suddenly, her eyes got a wicked glint. "Hey, do you still have your Invisibility Cloak?"
"Yeah," he said slowly. He really didn't like the look on her face. It always meant trouble.
"I think those Ravenclaw hoochies need to be taught a lesson, Gryffindor style."
"Didn't you say five minutes ago that you were sick of drama?"
"This isn't drama. It's war."
"What have any of those girls ever done to you?" Harry pointed out.
"You're a guy. You wouldn't understand," she huffed.
"Obviously not."
"So, are you in, or not? Come on, we're Prefects, for crying out loud. We're allowed to be out after hours in the first place. Besides, if Snape catches us, Isabelle will get us out of trouble." Hermione's eyes lit up. "Why didn't I think of her in the first place? Come on, Harry. Let's go find her. I bet she'd have good prank advice."
"Uh, I'm not sure if this is a good idea."
"You're being such a prude, Harry Potter," she huffed, packing her bookbag.
She turned on her heel crisply, and marched out of the library, not even giving Ron a passing glance as she walked by. Harry sighed, and ran after her. After all, hadn't she broken rules with him and gone along with all of his pranks through the years? Besides, he was curious about what Isabelle would tell her.
"Hey, Hermione – wait up," he called down the hall. She stopped, and turned around with a sly grin.
"I knew you wouldn't let me down. It's time to show the rest of the family what we're made of," she said devilishly. "Do you think we should look for Isabelle in her office or at home first?"
"Probably in her office. It's just down the hall, anyway."
"Sounds good to me."
As they walked down the empty corridor, two angry voices spilled into the hallway. Harry and Hermione looked at each other nervously because they recognized the voices immediately. Motioning for him to tiptoe along the wall closest to Isabelle's office door, Hermione crept closer, dying to know what the fight was about.
"Sirius, get out of my office now," she heard Isabelle yell. "I came here tonight precisely because I didn't want to deal with you."
"Please, just give me five minutes," he pleaded in a tone of voice neither teenager had ever heard before.
"I've given you enough of my time. Wouldn't you agree that the past twenty-three years is sufficient?"
"Just hear me out."
Both Harry and Hermione's jaws dropped at the same time. Never before, and probably never again, would they hear Sirius Black beg for anything.
"I've heard enough." Isabelle's voice was pure ice. "Besides, I believe we have visitors. After all, these are my regular office hours, and I am a professor."
"Quit trying to avoid me, please."
"And quit bothering me." Her voice suddenly sounded old and tired.
"Can't you see where I was coming from?"
"Absolutely not. And no one deserves to be called the names you called me, even if they are true. So, please leave before I throw you out."
"Fine." He banged his fist on the desk. At least, Harry thought it was his fist. "I'll leave for now. But, I'm not going to leave you alone, Isabelle. Not until you listen to me."
"Is that a threat?" Her voice was sharp and irate.
"It's a fact."
"You know what? You think that just because you're Sirius Black, whatever you say happens and whatever you want, you get. Well, I have a news flash for you. You can't just wish back last night. And I'm not just going to forgive you, like I would've when I was little. Guess what? I grew up, and I have more self-respect than that."
"I know you grew up. Isabelle--"
"No, don't Isabelle me, like I'm some unruly child and you're the scolding parent. Right now, you're no better than Sergei. You're using his tactics. Guess that figures, because I married him because he reminded me of you." She laughed hollowly. "Now I really know how much the two of you are alike."
"That was low."
"So was you calling me…what was it? Oh, yes." Isabelle started reciting a list of names that made Harry and Hermione gasp.
"Maybe we should come back tomorrow," Hermione whispered.
"Exactly what I was thinking," Harry replied.
They snuck down the hallway, desperately hoping that Isabelle forgot that they were lurking outside her office.
-----
"Ok, let's recap here," Hermione said, squinting at Harry. She stretched out her legs, enjoying the warm spring sun. It was almost worth skipping afternoon classes. Almost."So far, all I have is that Sirius called my aunt every name in the book. And, if he hurts her any more than he already has--" Harry cracked his knuckles angrily. How dare he speak to his Aunt Isabelle that way?
"Well, maybe she did do some of that stuff." Harry glared at her. "Yeah, you're right. She wouldn't do any of that in a million years. Now what?"
"Punch the git a few times."
"That really solves things."
"What can we do? If we admit that we overheard their conversation, we're dead."
"Very true." Hermione sighed. "So, I wonder if they were just arguing about Isabelle's love life for the heck of it, or if it was some sort of lover's quarrel?"
"Lover's quarrel? You really need to stop reading those romance novels."
She made a face at him. "Seriously."
"I don't know, Hermione." He yawned. "I need to meet Ginny before History of Magic. See you there?"
"Yeah. Don't forget we're going to Isabelle's office after class," she yelled at his retreating form.
Hermione tapped her fingers impatiently throughout History of Magic. Not only did she want class to hurry up and end, her tapping had the added side effect of irritating Ron. Although he pretended not to hear her, she could see his ears growing progressively redder as class wore on.
"Must you do everything to irk his everlasting nerve?" Harry hissed in her ear.
"Pretty much," she whispered back cheerfully.
Harry rolled his eyes, and was very thankful when class was over. He and Hermione made a beeline to Isabelle's office, hoping to catch her before another student knocked on her door. She was easily the most popular professor in the entire school, and students haunted her office constantly for anything from help with Potions homework to the perfect outfit to wear on a date. Harry quietly rapped on the door.
"Come in," she called out, smiling broadly when they walked into the room and sat down. "How are you guys?"
"We're ok," Hermione sighed, slouching.
"Just ok?" Isabelle raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah," she said quietly. Suddenly, she realized that being around Isabelle might not be the best idea right now.
"Alright, what's up?" She looked from one teenager to the other, narrowing her eyes.
"Explain this one to me, Aunt Isabelle. The prat over there says that she's sick of all the drama in her life, but she wants you to help her plan a prank on the Ravenclaw girls."
"Yes, the stupid bimbos that keep hanging all over Ron. It's sickening."
"Oh, yeah. The ones who should be arrested by the fashion police." Isabelle wrinkled her nose.
"Thank you," Hermione said, vindicated.
"I think they're cute," Harry replied, defending them again.
"You definitely need to see an optometrist, then," Isabelle told him, making a face. Hermione laughed.
"Are the two of you twins or something?" Harry asked, exasperated.
"No, it's just called taste," Hermione huffed.
"Definitely," Isabelle agreed. "Ok, I have two quick questions. One, why do you have issues with those Ravenclaw girls? And second, why are you coming to me for help."
"One, those girls know, I know they do, that Ron and I are sort of seeing each other. That one girl, Caitlin, loves to trick Ron into being her partner during Astronomy labs and then tries to get all romantic with him. And then, she always picks the telescope closest to mine and talks in this loud, fake voice, knowing that I can hear her. Wench," Hermione replied angrily. "Oh, and two – we've heard around that you're the all-time master of really ingenious pranks."
"Oh, thank you." Isabelle beamed, yawning. "Sorry. I've been really exhausted lately. It's probably this bloody cold. I just can't seem to shake it."
"Maybe you should take a nap," Harry offered helpfully.
"I just might. After I help y'all with your prank, of course," she said with a wicked gleam in her eyes. She sneezed loudly.
Hermione clasped her hands together excitedly. "Great! What do you have in mind?"
"Depends on whether y'all just want to play a fun prank, or become legends," Isabelle said mysteriously. "There's one prank that no one, not your parents, not Bill and I, or Fred and George has ever been able to pull off."
"We'll go with that one," Hermione replied in a rush.
"Ok. Anyone can sneak into the Ravenclaw dorm or mess with their table in the Great Hall. That's elementary stuff." She paused for dramatic effect. The kids hung on her every word.
"What? What is it?" Harry asked impatiently.
Isabelle looked at their curious, impatient faces and smiled, filing away the moment in her memory. Being around them makes everything else worth it, even dealing with Sergei, she decided.
And Sirius, for that matter, she reminded herself. Enjoy these moments, just in case he takes them away from you. She took a deep breath, and leaned over the desk dramatically.
"If y'all get caught or busted later, both of you will be expelled. I don't think your good names, grades or money could get you out of this one. That's why I never tried it – I was always in danger of being expelled."
"Wicked." Harry looked at his aunt in awe.
"Yeah, I think I hold the record for detention, at least before Fred and George came here. Anyway, if y'all get caught, I'm going to deny any knowledge of your prank. Got that?"
Both teenagers nodded, wide-eyed.
"This is like an episode of Mission Impossible," Hermione said, clasping her hands together excitedly.
"This is an impossible mission," Isabelle replied seriously. "As y'all know, there's a Quiddich match between Ravenclaw and Slytherin this Saturday."
"I like where this is going," Harry drawled. Whichever team won this match played Gryffindor for the house cup, and a good prank on the opposing teams would definitely inspire house spirit.
"And, as you know Harry, Madame Hooch keeps not only the game balls but also the uniforms under strict watch until shortly before the game."
"Why?" Hermione asked.
"To prevent cheating," Harry said in a rush. "So, what's the prank?"
Isabelle took out a legal pad and ballpoint pen. "It's an intricate series of charms that Bill, Andrew and I came up with when I was in fifth year. Unfortunately, all of us landed on academic probation for a little prank that we pulled on Slytherin that prevented us from doing this one. Glad to know our efforts won't go to waste after all."
"Ok," she began, scribbling down a list of lengthy charms, "the first step is to break into Madame Hooch's office and charm her whistle, the Quiddich balls, and the Ravenclaw uniforms."
"Uh, how do we get into her office?" Hermione asked practically. Isabelle rolled her eyes.
"You have an Invisibility Cloak, the Marauder's Map and you're a prefect. I'm sure you can figure something out. Anyway, this prank will only work if you get each step exactly right. One charm works off another, like a domino effect. The first charm that sets everything else off is Madame Hooch's whistle. As soon as she whistles for the game to start, the fun begins."
"What's going to happen?" Harry wondered if he was over his head, which, he probably was.
Isabelle laughed evilly. "Oh, several things. First, the Ravenclaw uniforms will instantly change into Gryffindor uniforms. Then, the Slytherin uniforms will read fun stuff like, 'I wish I was a Gryffindor and Slytherins Stink.' After the Slytherin uniforms change writing, everyone wearing either Slytherin or Ravenclaw colors will have their clothes turn into Gryffindor colors. Oh, and their hair will glow scarlet and gold. It'll be quite festive."
"That explains the whistle and the uniforms. But, why do we need to charm the balls?" Harry asked, beginning to get an awful feeling in the pit of his stomach. No wonder Isabelle said that she would deny any knowledge of this prank.
"That's the best part. Whenever anyone throws a Quaffle towards the goal posts, the ball will automatically enlarge and won't go through the hoop. The Bludgers will just run around the field aimlessly. As for the Snitch, it'll fly faster than the sound barrier for an hour. Then, it'll slow down. Basically, it'll be the lowest scoring game ever."
"Is there any way we can turn those Ravenclaw hoochies into hags for six hours or so?" Hermione asked wistfully.
"Sure." Isabelle added a couple of lines to the list, and drew an arrow where they belonged in the sequence. She passed Hermione the pad of paper. "All of these charms are completely unbreakable. Trust me – the two people who perfected the sequence are now Gringotts' bank's best charm breakers. And, I'm not so bad myself."
"Flitwick's going to have kittens," Harry said, laughing.
"No joke. Not to mention what Snape will do. He's not in a particularly good humor these days to start with."
"Wait a second. When will the charms wear off?" Harry puzzled.
"As soon as Madame Hooch blows the whistle at the end of the match."
"What do we do when Snape drags us into Dumbledore's office and tries to give us truth serum and everything else under the sun?" Hermione worried.
"Act perfectly polite and agree to the Veritaserum. But, before you take the potion, be sure to swallow this." Isabelle opened her desk drawer and pulled out two tiny vials filled with a pale blue liquid. "It's the antidote to Veritaserum. Snape doesn't even know that I can make it, so no one can point any fingers to me. That is, if y'all cover your tracks."
Harry looked at his aunt completely amazed. Is there anything that she can't do? he wondered. What kind of a super genius is she? He looked at Hermione, and could tell that she was thinking the exact same thing.
"We will," Harry said determinedly.
"Definitely. Thanks for everything, Isabelle," Hermione added.
"No problem. Break a leg." She smiled and shook her head as they left the office, probably going off to plan the details of the prank.