All or Nothing, a final fantasy viii fanfic

All or Nothing

The brunette girl groans as she slowly wakes up to a new day. As she opens her peridot eyes, her surroundings become visible.

"Where am I," the brunette whispers.

Her eyes scan the strange room. It appears to be a hotel room.

"What in the world? A hotel room? Then does that mean…."

She then turns her head to look beside her and sure enough there is a body silently lying there. Its steady breathing was the only audible sound in the room.

"Irvine? Oh my god…"

The girl then looks over at the other bed in the room. It's completely empty.

"I wonder where Squall and Zell went," she said, her memory slowly coming back to her.

Scenes of the night before suddenly flood her head…

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The sunset was so magnificent. Her hair shimmered like gold in the orange and red light.

"You look like an angel…" a male voice said.

"Really?" She asked him.

"Would I lie?"

Silence.

"You think I would lie to you?" He questioned.

"I promise…" was all she said.

"You just had to bring that up, didn't you?"

"So what if I did? We might as well talk about it." She said as she glared at him.

"Not now. I'm not in the mood for it." He mumbled.

"You never are. You act like your some hopeless lost cause that I can't have."

"You can't have me…" the man said as he walked away, leaving the girl to herself. He walked to the farthest section of the room and took out his shotgun and began to clean it.

I know when she's been on your mind
That distant look is in your eyes
I thought with time you'd realize
It's over, over
It's not the way I choose to live
And something some where's got to give
As sharing this relationship gets older, older

"Why not?! Why can't I have you? Quistis doesn't deserve you at all. She doesn't care about you at all. But I do. I care. Just let me show you how much I really care…" The brunette cried as she approached the long hair man sitting in a chair next to a desk. He had been ignoring her up until that point, shining the double barrel of his favorite gun.

"How," he asked, finally looking up at her.

"Oh so you are listening. For while there I though I was talking to a wall."

He looked the brunette up and down. She was shaking slightly and her face was wet with tears.

"You always know what to do, don't you?"

"What…"she said quietly.

"You know I can't stand to see you cry."

"I'm sorry for being human!"

"That's not what I meant. It pains me to see you in tears. It's scary to see you crying."

The long hair man walked over to the brunette and placed a hand on her face, wiping a tear or two from her cheek. She moved her dark eyes from the floor to meet his deep baby blue ones, immediately loosing herself in them.

"Hold me," she begs him.

The man pulls her closer to his body, wrapping his arms around her. After a few moments the brunette pulls away from his embrace and walks away from him. He follows her lead and meets her next to the bed. No words are exchanged at all. They stare long into each other's eyes before leaning in for a kiss. A kiss, the one thing she had been waiting for... somehow she had imagined it different.

She pulled away in a combination of fear, panic and ecstasy all in one. Was he thinking clearly at the time? Was she thinking clearly now? She put all her fears aside with one swift motion as she pulled the man down to the bed below. Covers were thrown all about along with clothes. Then at the peak of it all…the unimaginable happened.

"Oh…Quistis!"

The blonde's face lost all color

"Quistis? You think I'm Quistis," she began. "You can be such an ass sometimes!"

She immediately rolled away from his warm, sweat-covered body, and looked away from him.

"Oh my god…I'm so sorry…I didn't mean to…."

"Forget it…It's nothing. I'm over reacting."

If she let that small mistake get in the way of this, then she'd never have him. All she wanted was Irvine, and nothing was going to stop her from being with him.

Passion overcame her once again as she pulled the only cover left on the bed over them…not to see the outside world for quite a while.

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You know I'd fight for you
But how I can fight someone who isn't even there
I've had the rest of you now I want the best of you
I don't care if that's not fair

She gathers up her clothes and throws some on, shaking the memory from her head. The open balcony door caught her attention, drawing her out onto it. The morning sunrise that was just starting reminded her of the sunset the night before.

"It really is beautiful…" she whispers to herself.

"Just like you."

The girl turns around to find the man standing in the doorway.

"Irvine…did we really?

"I'm afraid so. Are you okay?"

The girl hesitated but decided that he needed to know the truth.

"No, I'm not. I have this friend…and she thinks she's in love with this guy. But she's not sure how to tell him and if she should. I'm really worried about her lately. She can't get him off her mind."

"Your friend should follow what's inside. It sounds like he's stolen her heart."

"He has…"

The brunette turns away to look back out at the sunrise, her eyes welling up with tears.

"Selphie? What's wrong?"

"I love you Irvine," she blurted out. "I've loved you for quite a while now. I'm not sure how it happened but all that matters is that it did. I want to be with you. I'm not saying forever but long enough to take my loneliness away. Stay with me…please?"

"No…you can't love me. You just can't love me…"

Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's no where left to fall
When you reach the bottom it's now or never
Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call
You leave me here with nothing at all

"What…"she gasps.

"Please don't say that. And please don't cry…"

"But Irvine…I really do lo…"

"Don't say it! You don't mean it." He yells.

"Yes I do!"

"No, you don't. You and me can never be Selphie. We just can't. I didn't want to do this…but…" Irvine sighs deeply and lets a few stray tears fall down his face. "I don't want to be with you. Please understand…"

Irvine turns around and quickly walks back into the room and immediately leaves the hotel.

"Oh god no…don't do this to me…"

Selphie collapsed to the floor, her green eyes spilling tears on her red cheeks. She hit the floor with all her might with a balled up fist.

"Why?! Why…" she whimpered.

Irvine wasn't in any better shape. He continued to walk on down the road, not sure as to where he was going.

"What have I done?! I'm not even sure if I truly care for Quistis. That was the last thing I wanted to do to her. I'm such a fool…"

Squall and Zell pass by Irvine on their way back to the room, stopping in their tracks when they see the tears in his eyes.

"Are you alright man," Zell asked.

"Just leave me alone…" Irvine grumbled as he walked on, dropping something as he went. Zell picked up the silver glittering object and handed to Squall.

"Oh no…it's the ring…Squall, I think we better find Selphie," she gasped.

"You mean the ring she gave him? Oh shit…"

There are times it seems to me
I'm sharing you in memory
I feel it in my heart
But I don't show it, show it

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Ten Years Later…

Selphie leaned in closer to her dance partner. His blonde hair was in a messy state and still had some cake in it. Selphie laughed as she noticed this and wiped it away. His blue eyes watched her hand as she wiped the frosting away.

"What's so funny?" He smiled at her.

"You're such a mess. You need a shower." Selphie giggled.

"So do you, Sprinkles."

She felt the top of her head and sure enough there was still candy sprinkles in her hair.

"Hyne I love you…"

"I know," he said with a charming smile.

As the man swung her around, she caught a glimpse of the main doors. A reddish brown hair man stood there. He had on a cowboy hat and was dressed very nicely. Selphie stared at him for a while, locking eyes with him. He then started to approach her.

"Zell, stop for a minute," she asked him.

"Huh? What is it?"

The man continued to stare into her green eyes, like he couldn't look away.

"Those eyes…"

And then there's times you look at me
As though I'm all that you can see
Those times I don't believe it's right
I know, know it

"Selphie is it really you," the voice gives him away.

"Yes, it's really me. But…what are you doing here Irvine?"

He shakes his head.

"I really don't know."

Selphie studies his face carefully.

"There's something on your mind I can tell," she whispers gently.

Irvine dodges the subject by looking away from her. Out of the blue, the DJ puts on one of Selphie's favorite songs, their former song.

"Not that song…not right now at least…"she mumbles to herself.

"Selphie," he says, almost in tears, "You don't know how long I've waited to see you. How long I've looked for you," "And the last place I wanted to find you was at your wedding."

"Oh please…don't do this…"

"I've spent ten long years, from the night in the Deling Hotel with you... it's stayed with me all that time." he said, trying to stop the tears. "I've come to realize you were right. She was wrong for me. I know you loved me. I'm sorry for pushing you away. I was just so afraid that if we were to be just you and me, I'd just end up hurting you. But what I didn't take into account was that I would hurt you more by leaving you behind."

"Irvine…" she said as she shook her head.

"I didn't see what I had until it was gone, and I want another chance. I promise never to leave your side again."

Don't me make me promises
Baby you never did know how to keep them well
I've had the rest of you
Now I want the best of you
It's time for show and tell

Selphie stares blankly at Irvine for an eternity. She's not sure what to do.

(I had loved Irvine with everything I was…but times have changed. Oh god…why did he have to come back now…) she thought to herself. She then worked up the courage to say the words he needed to hear…not the ones he wanted.

"But you're too late, I love someone else. Zell was there for me, when you weren't. He's given me the love that you couldn't."

Irvine's eyes fell to the floor, not sure what to say or do now. Only three words came to his mind.

"I love you…"

"I'm sorry…" she said, tears in her eyes. "I'm so sorry…"

"Don't cry…please. But it's the truth. Selphie, I really do love you. I'm sorry it took so long. Please…just one more chance?"

"I can't Irvine; my heart belongs to Zell now."

It's then that he realizes what she means as she turns to look at Zell. The loving look in her eyes as she glances at him is enough to shatter Irvine's heart.

"Selphie, could you come over for a second. Cid would like to talk to you for a moment," Zell calls to her.

Cause you and I
Could lose it all if you've got no more room
No room inside for me in your life
Cause I want it all
Or nothing at all
There's no where left to fall
It's now or never

Selphie turns and looks back at Irvine with saddened eyes.

"I can't promise and I can't wait any more Irvine…"

Is it all
Or nothing at all
There's no where left to fall
When you reach the bottom it's now or never
Is it all
Or are we just friends
Is this how it ends
With a simple telephone call
You leave me here with nothing at all

Irvine looks at the silver ring on his hand and slips it off and hands it to Selphie.

"Keep it. Give it to Zell, I'm sure he'll like as much as I did."

Selphie looks into his eyes one last time.

"…I'm sorry…" she whispered.

As her new husband calls out her name again, she walks away from Irvine and into Zell's arms, leaving him standing there, with nothing at all.