Here's a story that I thought up after reading Glitch by Black Dragon (a very good author and if you haven't already I suggest that you read his works). It is I warn you a self-insert, and a possible crossover (beyond Ranma that is). There will be almost blatant Akane/Genma bashing. Well if anyone has a problem... write it in a review and I'll see what I can do (Meaning flames will be used to try and power my new steam powered computer, it will work Dammit.)

Disclaimer: I don't own Ranma, Sailor Moon, Tenchi, or a great deal of the other series that will surely appear in this story.

Now without further ado a fic by Yume.

Strange Occurrences

Prologue: Say What?... Oh.

Mild mannered Yume Master was working diligently against the forces of evil, in a vain attempt to make the world a better place. Or at least snag him some more anime. "No ma'am I'm sorry but we are not allowed to break up the packages of steaks it's against regulation." "For chriss sake I can't believe this I'm going to speak to a manager about this." The kind hearted patient woman, who didn't interrupt his carefully laid schedule so that he wouldn't get into trouble for working Overtime for the fourth time that week, walked away as Yume slid the window shut. Yume sighed at he went back to his cleaning, not having noticed that the other cleaner had just soaped down the floor for cleaning. He did however notice when his equilibrium was suddenly began shifting. His arms flailed his feet shifted quickly as he slid forward and smacked into a wall. Said wall holding the cutting implements used by his co-workers so as to prepare things to thwart evil. Unfortunately for the brave Yume, said implements dislodged from their holder as it lost one of its support screws and tilted. The last thing Yume's living eyes saw were a pair of fiendish tongs heading for his eyes, oh and some pointy knives heading for the rest of his body.

Yume's co-worker looked up from the radio upon which he was attempting to tune a decent (in his mind) station. To his surprise Yume lied in a pool of his own blood several sharpened utensils sticking from his rapidly cooling corpse. Slowly approaching the body he poked it a few times with one of the mops. Upon no movement he proceeded to retrieve the stereo remote from Yume's pocket and switched to the CD player. Dropping the now useless remote on the body, whose blood he was mopping up so as to "properly dispose" of it like the boss had said.

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Yume looked around or at least tried to but that damned light kept him from seeing anything. After a few minutes or looking for somewhere (aside from the light) to go he finally gave up and headed towards the light.

'Why do I have a strange sense of foreboding?'

Suddenly he stopped not due to his own actions but just because he couldn't go forward anymore. Looking to his left he was greeted with nothing turning back to check his right side he was greeted by a rather large imposing and downright cool looking vision. A tall figure that loomed over Yume dressed in a black hooded cloak, holding a wickedly sharp sickle.

"If I didn't know any better I'd say you were the Grim Reaper."

The figure looked at him for a moment before replying.

"THEN YOU DON'T KNOW ANY BETTER."

Yume took a minute to figure that out and came to a startling realization.

"So, I'm dead?"

"PRETTY MUCH."

"Damn it."

Yume looked to Death for a little while and finally his part-time impatient nature took over.

"So what now?"

"WE WAIT FOR JUDGMENT TO BE PASSED ON YOUR IMMORTAL SOUL."

"What?! I don't get to defend myself?"

"NO."

Death deciding to peruse the mortal's files took out a rather thick folder and opened it up to the main page. After a few minutes of reading on Death's part and a few minutes of balancing a pencil on one's index finger by Yume, Death paused and looked up at Yume.

"YOU'RE WHAT?"

"I'm what?"

"IT SAYS HERE THAT YOUR RELIGION IS AS FOLLOWS: THREE PARTS CATHOLIC, TWO PARTS ATHEIST?"

Yume shrugged and offered Death a cigarette (which he declined,) "don't ask it's too complicated."

Death nodded and continued, "ONE PART BAPTIST, ONE PART LUTHERAN, ONE PART METHODIST, ONE PART TAO, AND ONE PART MORMON."

Yume's cigarette dropped to the ground after the fifth attempt to light it, "I wonder where the Mormon came from."

Death's only response was a half-hearted shrug, "IN ANY CASE SINCE THE MAJORITY OF YOUR BELIEFS ARE CHRISTIAN."

Yume interrupted him, "Wait a sec you mean just general Christianity is correct not a faction of it."

"YES."

"Damn."

"IN ANY CASE NORMALLY YOU WOULD BE HEADING TO THE PEARLY GATES, AND INTO HEAVEN."

"Ok and is there a problem that says otherwise?"

Death shook his head, "NOT THAT I'M AWARE OF, I JUST FIGURED I'D LET YOU..."

Before Death could finish a beeping noise was heard.

"HANG ON."

Yume boggled as Death reached into his cloak and pulled out a cell phone. After a few moments of Death corresponding with the person (?) on the other end, he finally hung up.

"THERE'S A PROBLEM."

"Such as?"

"IT SEEMS THAT YOU DON'T COMPLETELY OWN YOUR SOUL."

"Completely?"

"YOU OWN ABOUT ONE THIRD OF IT."

"How did that happen?"

Death scanned through the folder and stopped close to the end.

"YOU SOLD YOUR SOLD THREE WAYS."

"I did?"

"YES, FIRST PARTY SOLD TO WAS... YOURSELF."

"I sold my own soul to myself?... What did I get for... myself?"

Death scanned the page, "A COSTCO SIZED BAG OF LEMONHEADS."

"Damn I AM a shrewd businessman."

Death merely stared at Yume for a bit, till he shakes himself from his daze."

"IN ANY CASE THE SECOND AND THIRD PARTIES ARE... HEAVEN AND HELL."

"Both? How did that happen?"

"APPARENTLY YOU MADE A DEAL, THAT IF A CERTAIN SERIES OF EVENTS CAME TO PASS THEN THE SIDE RESPONSIBLE WOULD GET THE REMAINING PORTIONS OF YOUR SOUL."

"Oh yeah... HEY! Neither delivered."

"BUT SINCE IT WAS A BLOOD SIGNED DOCUMENT, THE SOUL WAS DIVIDED TILL SOMETHING CHANGED THE SCALES OF THE SITUATION."

"Blood signed?"

"PAPER CUT."

"Ahhh of course."

"WITH THIS IN MIND YOU WON'T BE GOING TO HEAVEN."

"So I'm hell bound eh?"

"I NEVER SAID THAT."

"But you just said 'you won't be going to heaven.'"

"I NEVER MENTIONED HELL DID I?"

"No I guess not."

"WHILE YOU ARE NOT HELL BOUND THIS CERTAINLY COMPLICATES MY JOB."

"It does?"

"YES, NORMALLY I REAP THE SOUL AND LEAD IT TO WHERE IT NEEDS TO GO, WITH YOU HOWEVER THERE HAS TO BE A CHANGE IN ROUTINE."

Yume smiled he always liked the idea of 'fight the power'.

"YOU NOW HAVE THREE CHOICES AS TO WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU. FIRST OPTION IS ETERNAL PURGATORY, WHICH IS BASICALLY YOU SITTING IN AN ENDLESS VOID UNTIL THE END OF TIME."

"Um let me think... I'll pass."

Death nodded and continued, "SECOND WOULD BE FOR YOU TO ALLOW YOUR SOUL TO BE RECYCLED THROUGH KARMA."

'About where would that put me upon rebirth?"

Death went over a figure or two in his head then answered Yume, "ABOUT THE LEVEL OF A SMALL DOG TO A LARGE BUG."

Yume shuddered at the very thought of being an oversized rat.

"OF COURSE THERE IS THE THIRD OPTION: APPRENTICESHIP."

"Apprenticeship?"

"YOU WILL CHOOSE FROM A SELECT GROUP OF DEITIES AND OTHER SUPERNATURAL BEINGS LOOKING FOR AN APPRENTICE."

Yume had to think very long and hard about this. (Yeah Right)

"I'll go with the apprenticeship, although that whole endless void was tempting."

If Death had eyes in his current form to roll he would have. He reached into his cloak and pulled two pieces of paper and a pen.

"What I don't have to sign in blood?"

"TOO MESSY BESIDES YOU DON'T HAVE ANY BLOOD YOU'RE DEAD."

Yume nodded at the logic, and took the pen, and paper Death handed him. After looking the paper over he decided he might as well sign it (after all the only thing it said of it was 'I Agree.' kind of straightforward.) Death nodded and returned the first paper into the folds of his robe and handed him the other sheet.

"HERE IS A LIST OF BEINGS LOOKING FOR APPRENTICES."

The list was by no means long; in fact it only had three names.

"Hmm Death, Loki, or the Almighty?"

"THAT'S A TYPO, IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE ALRIGHTY."

Yume had to stop for a bit after that one.

"Okay I won't ask."

"GOOD I WON'T ANSWER."

Yume looked the list over again, "... so you're looking for an apprentice? Are you giving any benefits?"

Death sighed and silently cursed the unions.

"AS A MATTER-OF-FACT I AM: TEN UNIFORM CLOAKS (NO REAPER SHOULD BE WITH OUT ONE), BASIC MAGIC POWER AND KNOWLEDGE, THIS YOU CAN STRENGTHEN ON YOUR OWN, ONE SNATH AND TWO SCYTHE BLADES."

Yume nodded, "Is there anything in particular that I would need to do in order to get this position."

"NOT REALLY, JUST BASICALLY PASS AN ON SCENE TRIAL SORT-TO-SPEAK."

"On scene trial?"

"WE CAN'T LET JUST ANYONE GO AROUND REAPING SOULS NOW CAN WE?"

"I guess not."

"OH YES I ALMOST FORGOT, IN ADDITION TO WHAT I ALREADY SPOKE OF YOU WILL RECEIVE A BIT OF INGRAINED TRAINING SO THAT YOU MAY BETTER HANDLE YOUR SCYTHE, BASICALLY IT WILL CONSIST OF TRAIN WITH YOUR SCYTHE, A POLE AXE, A BO, A QUARTERSTAFF, AND A SPEAR."

"All that? Just to wield a scythe?"

"NO BUT IT'S PART OF THE PACKAGE."

"Package sir?" Yume decided he was going to take Death's offer so he figured he might as well be respectful to his supervisor.

"Well I might as well; after all I always wanted to be a harbinger of Destruction."

"DEATH."

"Close enough for my purposes."

Death nodded and put away the apprenticeship list.

"NOW THEN REGARDING YOUR TRIAL, YOU ARE GOING TO BE SENT TO ONE OR MORE UNIVERSES (DEPENDING ON YOU PERFORMANCE.) THERE YOU WILL MEET WITH A SUBJECT, WHOM YOU WILL HAVE TO ASSIST IN ACHIEVING A SPECIFIED GOAL."

"Okay."

"YOU WILL BE 'SCORED' BASED ON YOUR PERFORMANCE. YOU WILL HAVE FIVE CHANCES, SHOULD YOU NEED THEM, AFTER WHICH YOU WILL RECEIVE AN OVERALL SCORE, WHICH IF GOOD ENOUGH WILL ALLOW YOU TO BECOME MY HEIR BASICALLY."

Yume nodded at that.

"PREPARE YOURSELF YUME!"

Suddenly a portal directly above Yume opens and out fall: a pack, a rather large book, two scythe blades, a snath, and ten robes. All of which landed directly on top of Yume knocking him to the floor.

".... Oww."

Death nods down at Yume then waits as Yume gathers his things into the deceptively large pack.

"NOW YOU ARE READY."

"I am?"

"YES."

"Right... uh... you're sure now?"

Death lets out yet another sigh.

"YOUR NEW KNOWLEDGE WILL BASICALLY ACTIVATE UPON ARRIVAL TO THE PLANE."

"Cool, so where am I going?"

Death begins to cast the spell carving an arcane symbol in the air.

"YOUR GUESS IS AS GOOD AS MINE APPRENTICE."

"WHAT?!!"

"GOOD LUCK."

With that a portal opens beneath Yume's feet sucking the former teen into an icy black abyss and into the unknown.