Authors Note: I decided to write this to get my muse working again so I can finish my other stories, I do not own Third Watch nor its characters, or the lyrics to this song, they belong to Mandy Moore. Enjoy & feel free to give your opinions
Summary: Bosco returns home from a rehabilitation center, and confronts Faith to find out why she never called or visited.
Spoilers: General knowledge up to and including the 6th season.
Cry
I haven't seen her, I haven't seen her since I was transferred down to Brooklyn for the rest of my rehabilitation. The last time I was able to look her in the eye was almost a year ago, when I couldn't walk or even speak. Hell, the most I could do at the time was roll my eyes just enough to look at her.
She never visited me when I went for the rest of my therapy. My mom came down every weekend and stayed at my bedside or by my wheelchair. She always stood strong, trying to be tough for me. Every time she told me that Faith might come down the weekend after the next, and I always waited, but she never came.
I couldn't understand why, was she mad at me still for getting her shot? Or maybe she didn't want to come near me because I'm like the touch of death. Everything around me has been dying lately. My little brother was viciously murdered, my mother ran down by a car in her own sons wake, and all the people in Mercy Hospital were caught in the middle of a full fledged shoot-out. Maybe she was afraid I'd somehow kill her. I don't know, but I wish I new the reason.
I have written her a couple of letters, not very long ones because my penmanship was very bad at the beginning, it felt like a needle was being stabbed into my wrist every time I wrote a word. It has improved greatly, thanks to intense therapy treatment. She never wrote me back, and I kept telling myself that it was because my writing was to messy for her to read, or the post office didn't get it to the right address. I asked my mom to take her my letters when I was able to talk, she said she'd try, but she always had this look in her eyes that my attempts were pathetic and would never work.
Eventually I stopped asking my mom where she was, or what she was up to. She usually just looked at me sadly when I asked anyways. There was even one time when I flipped out and asked why she was being so secretive, I accused her of hiding the truth, that Faith had died at Mercy that day and everyone was just trying to lead me on so I'd get better faster.
That was definitely one of my lower days.
She had started to cry and told me quickly that Faith was fine, she wasn't dead.
I new that of course, I'd seen her with my own eyes when I had waken from that coma I was in for 2 weeks, hell she was the first thing I saw, very much alive with tears flowing down her cheeks. I apologized to my mom and it was left at that. Faith's name rarely came up in a conversation.
Now, April 8th, 2005...I'm leaving Brooklyn and as far as I'm concerned I'm NEVER going back. I'm going back to New York, to my home, to my memories and to Faith. The car ride is a long, silent one, my mom is driving me back because my car is at her house for safe keeping, and I am in no particular mood to drive, I'd rather drown in my thoughts.
Soon I'm back at my apartment, it smells clean, to clean for my liking…to much like a hospital. I quickly walk into the kitchen and open my fridge, it's full of fresh foods and drinks. Which is odd, because my mom had told me when I was leaving her house that I'd have to go grocery shopping, she'd cleaned up everything and kept it maintained, but hadn't had enough time to get any food.
I quickly pour myself a glass of fresh lemonade, it tastes good, to good to be the store bought kind. Almost as if its homemade. I quickly push aside my confusion of the fully stocked fridge when I realize there is no beer. Whoever did this didn't want me drinking.
As I move to put my glass in the sink, a flash of paper catches my eye, a neatly folded note is resting on my dust free countertop. I open it gently and read the 7 neat handwritten words that are written on it;
Meet me at the bridge at 5.
I know who its from immediately, her neat handwriting and the word "bridge" giving it away instantly. I chance a glance at the digital clock on my microwave and discover that it is almost 4, just enough time to have a shower and get into something much more attractive than an old sweater and pants.
Pulling off my sweater as I walk into the bathroom, I quickly turn the faucet on and let the water get warm and steamy. I step in and let the soothing water run down my body. Washing my hair and body and then just relaxing for a couple of minutes as the water calms my anxieties. I soon find myself feeling where the 3 bullet holes penetrated my back, I don't need to see them to know that they are there, white scars, they are small now thanks to the skilled hands of the doctors, but it doesn't change the insignificance of them.
For the remainder of my life they will be there, proving how something so small can be so powerful, powerful enough to take your life in the flash of a second.
I tear myself away from my thoughts and turn off the faucet, stepping out into the steamy room to dry myself off and to get dressed. I wipe the mirror clear so that I can brush my hair, and stare at my reflection. A thin white scar runs down from my left ear to the side of my mouth, the path of destruction the fourth bullet had caused. I hate it, and I don't think I'll ever get used to it. Sure, the doctors had done a great job of hiding it as best they could, my mom said that people would really have to look to see it, but I hate knowing it's there, like a constant reminder of all that went wrong that sad, cold day.
I jump with a start when I realize I've been staring at myself in the mirror for almost 5 minutes. I hurriedly throw some gel in my hair, grab my keys and lock the door behind me as I get into my mustang.
I slowly drive to the bridge, it doesn't take long to get there and I've got more than enough time. It feels good to be driving my car again, a chill runs down my spine when I remember when the doctor told me I'd never be able to walk or talk again. Proved him the hell wrong. I think to myself with a grin of satisfaction. Nobody thought I'd be able to do it, except Faith. I was shipped out of Mercy a mere week after I had woken up, and during that week I had a steady stream of visitors, I don't remember much because I was still in a "vegetative" state, but I do remember the sad and pathetic looks every single person gave me as they left.
The bridge finally comes into view, and my anxieties return. What if she had me meet her here so that she could tell me to stay put of her life once and for all?
I park my mustang beside what looks like a brand new car, its dark blue and looks like a Ford Malibu, I don't recognize it, all Faith ever drove was Fred's truck. I scan the area for the truck but I don't see it anywhere, I do however, catch a site of a women leaning up against the side of the bridge, her hands in her jacket pockets as she stares up at the cloudy sky.
Its her. It's Faith.
(I'll always remember
It was late afternoon
It lasted forever
And ended too soon
You were all by yourself
Staring up at a dark gray sky
I was changed)
My heart starts to thump uncomfortably against my ribs as I slowly get out of my car and shut the door softly behind me. My shoes crunch against the small twigs and stones that I walk on as I come to a stop beside her and lean up against the bridge. She still doesn't look at me, but I can tell that she was recently crying, concern washes over me but I say nothing.
"Bosco…" She finally whispers, still looking up at the sky.
"Hey…" I say back softly, not entirely sure what I should say to her.
"I didn't think you would come, but I'm glad you did." She says, her voice shaking.
I think for a minute, and decide not to bring up why she didn't come and see me or at least phone when I was Brooklyn, instead I say, "Nobody told me…what happened to Mann after I was uh…shot?"
"Well, he's part of the reason why I never visited you." She says hesitantly.
"What?" I asked, looking over at her sharply.
(In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
It was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry)
"That day, when you got shot, I well…I kind of flipped out. After I told your mom you were in surgery, I overheard Cruz speaking with Yoshi, he was in league with Mann all along…and he said he'd take her to his house. I think he was kind of scared of Cruz, she was pretty pissed. Anyway-- I took Jelly's squad and followed them. I found Cruz and Mann on the roof, he was in cuffs and was telling Cruz that he wouldn't stop trying until all of us were dead. I…I emptied my gun into him Bos…I shot him four times with my last four bullets, when he was in custody…" She said softly, staring at the ground, her hair falling in front of her face.
(The moment that I saw you cry
It was late in September
And I've seen you before (and you were)
You were always the cold one
But I was never that sure
You were all by yourself
Staring at a dark gray sky
I was changed )
I stared at her for moment. "Why did you do that?" I asked, my voice full of shock.
"I had to take care of it for you Bos…I took care of it for you…for my partner." She said as her voice started to break.
I was floored, she had murdered a man for me. "Then…how come your not in jail?" I counter.
"I was." She laughed hoarsely. "Cruz tried to cover it up for me so I could be with you…said you needed me. So we said Mann pulled a knife on her and I shot him to save her…we used the knife one of the shooters tried to kill Davis with at Mercy. It worked for a little while, but then about a week after you were taken to Brooklyn, me and Cruz were both arrested for manslaughter. We were in jail for nearly 3 months before we were released and all charges were dropped. I told your mom not to tell you why I really couldn't be with you…I was to ashamed…"
"I don't get it, how did the detectives find proof to convict the both of you and how the hell did you manage to get released with all charges dropped?" I ask, my confusion growing by the second.
"We don't know how they got evidence against us, all I know is that someone was snooping through private files…if I find out who was responsible for putting me in jail and causing me to lose custody of my kids…" She spat angrily, her calm demeanor fading for a minute. "Oh, the charges were dropped because over half of New York protested against our arrest when they read about it in the newspapers. The judge threw out the case and said there was lack of evidence…but I think she wanted to see that son of a bitch Mann dead just as much as I did." She added.
"Whoa, lost custody of the kids?" I asked incredulously.
"Another reason why I couldn't visit you…Fred and I got a divorce, I only get to see the kids on the weekends and every other holiday…" Faith said sadly.
"Damn…Faith I'm sorry…"
"Yeah, me too." She said back shortly.
(In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
It was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The m0oment I saw you cry
"Listen Bos…I can understand if you never want to see me again…I'm so sorry…for everything…the fights, me getting you shot, not calling or visiting…I'm sorry…"
"You didn't get me shot, Faith." I said firmly.
"If I had of gotten down quicker that day you wouldn't have had to shield me…god when I saw you that last day…the day you were leaving for Brooklyn…I was so ashamed of myself…because of me you almost lost your life." She whispered.
"Faith look at me…please?" I gently ask.
For the first time in a year she finally turns her head and looks up at me, her eyes flooding with tears that begin to slowly slip down her face. "It hurt me so much when you almost died Bos…I couldn't look at you trying so hard to get better when it was next to impossible…not when it was my fault you were like that way in the first place. " She cried. "Please don't get mad at you mom, she was just respecting my wishes…every day when she came home she'd phone and tell me about how you were doing…and she gave me the letters you wrote...I kept them…"
Before I know what I'm doing, I'm pulling her into a gentle yet firm hug. She starts to sob uncontrollably into my chest.
(I wanted to hold you
I wanted to make it go away
I wanted to know you
I wanted to make your everything, all right.…)
"Faith…"
She looks up at me and gently traces the scar across my cheek and says, "I'm so sorry I did this to you…"
"Faith…I chose to protect you that day…I didn't have to…I wanted to." I whisper as my left hand finds hers and holds it against my cheek, my own eyes filling with the tears I've wanted to shed for over a year. I still have not yet cried…not over my brother, not over Faith, not over my mom when was she was hurt and not over my own scars and painful memories of trying to get better.
"I don't know what I would have done if I had of lost you…" Faith mumbles into my jacket.
A tear slowly drips down my cheek. "Faith…I'll never leave you…I'm here forever and your not getting rid of me."
(I'll always remember...
It was late afternoon...
In places no one would find…)
We stood there until the cloudy sky turned black with the night, neither of us feeling the biting cold on our skin. There was still a lot of unanswered questions, but I found that I didn't need to ask them, I just wanted to put the past behind both of us. I didn't need to hear anymore why she didn't come and visit or talk to me in a year…I now that she cares about me and right now that is all that matters.
Besides…I forgave her the moment I saw her cry.
(In places no one would find
All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
It was then that I realized
That forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry)
…end
First attempt at a song fic, I know it was kind of shaky, my apologies. Anyways, what do you think? I'd really love to hear you're thoughts