Azure : Walking Contradiction

Rating : PG-13

Author's Note: Second chapter up! The Preliminary test week was whacked. I had trouble updating so…I chose to do it on the weekends. XD Which is very much today! Thank you for the wonderful support you guys have given me! Just so you people know, I'm very much a Filipino…Hello to Filipino RuHaru fans out there!! LOL.

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[Rukawa's POV]

It's not that I don't know how to love; it's just that I don't want to.

I refuse to.

It's not that I've become cruel; it's just that my heart has died.

I choose to.

It's not that I want to hurt you; it's just that I want to protect myself.

I'm scared to.

I could come up with a million reasons to protect myself, blinding myself from the truth. The problem is—

I've become immune to pain.

Not being able to feel pain is the same as not being able to feel happiness. The heart becomes void and everything else follows.

I can feel my soul slowly fading away.

Today Mitsui hates me, tomorrow everyone else will.

Tch, how unfair!

All because I refuse to love?

That's crap.

It was nine o' clock in the evening when arrived home. No one was there…At least, no one from my family.

I was living in a mansion made of ice and snow.

"Kaede-sama, your food is cold."

"Please let me change into some fresh clothes before you tell me to eat."

The old woman let out a gasp, slightly offended by my sharp tongue. I was a bit upset , my words have become quite weak and soft compared to the past, where the tongue I lash out leaves a wound on somebody's heart.

Like I said, I was living in an ice mansion, a large traditional Japanese house. It was an ice mansion for everyone who lives there has forgotten how to feel.

They were, to me, no different from the wood and paper that composed it.

I really hate coming home.

But it's not like I have a choice.

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[Haruko's POV]

I can recover form this, I probably can. At least, I hope I can. Exactly how many times to I have to say it? "I can" is like a mantra inside my head.

I can!

"Ah..Ouch!"

It was the fifth time I cut myself with the kitchen knife. The freesh red blood oozing out of my wounded digit; I left the daikon radish on the chopping board, rushing to the sink. I turn on the faucet watching the crimson liquid, the strength of it's color fading as the water washes it away, right down the drain.

A squeezing force pains my chest, my heart. Memories of Rukawa-kun flood me again.

Now that I didn't have that person I always looked up to, now that I don't have that person that makes me stronger than I usually am…

…I feel like crumbling and breaking down.

I am sinking into oblivion. 

I kneel down the floor, and I cover my face. I cover it because the burning tears fall freely.

Mom and Dad are still at work.

Big brother is still at basketball practice. 

Matsui and Fuji aren't home.

That's probably why…I feel so alone.

"Big brother! Please come home soon!"

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"Akagi-sempai…!"

Takenori was surprised, for the first time in his entire life, Hanamichi Sakuragi had acknowledged him as his senior. In the cold night air, he faces the red headed monkey with the usual great confidence fit for Shohoku's team captain.

"I won't be able to forgive..that bastard! That Rukawa! That—asshole!"

Sakuragi cleched his fists, he had enough of playing the fool, he couldn't take it.

This was the last, final straw.

Rukawa went too far.

"Sakuragi, just to be fair, I don't place all the blame on him."

"Why not?! He's a fucking moron!"

Akagi twitched, someday…he may have to wash Sakuragi's mouth with detergent.

"Haruko may be my sister, but I'm not foolish enough to force my ace player into loving her."

"But don't you want her to be happy?"

Sakuragi was helplessly in love with the team captain's sister, more than Aota, more than anyone else. But the red-head was definitely aware of  how much the girl admired (and nearly worshipped) Shohoku's number eleven.

Sakuragi was stupid, but never selfish. He did his best in the games to impress Haruko, but never forced her to anything she didn't want. He treated her with ample admiration and respect, something very rare nowadays.

Haruko would be much happier with Sakuragi rather than Rukawa.

Akagi thought. He looked at Sakuragi again, he trusted number ten with Haruko as much as he trusts him with the rebound.

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Tomorrow would be the day that Haruko should (or would) forget about her silly highschool crush.

Just a simple, silly highschool crush.

A crush she may have mistook for her first love.

She was a presuming young girl who could never comprehend…the walking contradiction.

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Author's Notes:  More introspective rather than plot development, but I think this was needed for character development. Yes, watch me giggle madly. Why do I assume that Rukawa's rich? I have no idea…Why do I assume he's living in a traditional Japanese home? I have no idea…Must have something to do with his looks. Spoiled, little Japanese boy. Bah. So lovable, do you agree? Hmm…the smell of a furious Kaede get closer and closer. I was trying to be realistic to everyone's reactions, especially Akagi's he's such a nice brother, yet very smart! He's responsible and well-balanced, a very good person. Me likes Akagi….O.o;       

Chapter Sneak Peek: Presumptions are not to be taken seriously, just when you think it's over… fate places you into a dangerous path that may make you want to pretend you didn't see what was coming. Haruko and Rukawa's paths collide.