Numb: I Can't Feel You There Chapter 7: Lost: I Hate Everything About You, Three Days Grace, a yu yu hakusho fanfic

Gabbi: Wow! We did so well! I am resuming my old schedule… it's Numb day!

*everyone dances* IT'S A GREAT DAY FOR AN LOTR FANGIRL! 11/11 BABY! ALL WON! Hail to the Hobbits, the Elves, and the Man… I am doing an LOTR fanfic later this week in honor of this grand event! I saw the whole thing!

Kurama: You were up that late?!

Gabbi: Yep!

Kurama: o.O;

Gabbi: Replies to reviews:

Kori- Seriously? You are crying? Wow…

Kurama: You, ma'am, are sick and twisted.

Gabbi: Meh…

Kurama: *looks over her shoulder* AH HA! SAM/FRODO FANFICTION!

Gabbi: I just hope you all realize that if Sam and Frodo were modern they'd be looked upon as gay… the way Lord of the Rings takes place and all, it is not viewed as 'gay'. I just felt like pointing that out.

TheUnlovedOutcast- I think we all can relate to this fanfic. We have all been betrayed, all witnessed Death, all went through the pains of life. Some of us snap and some of us keep going.

Yeah… let's go…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Numb: I Can't Feel You There

Chapter 7: Lost, Three Days Grace, I Hate Everything About You

***

~*Everytime we lie awake*~

Kurama slowly opened his eyes. It was really late. He got up, noticing Kuroibara at his futon.

Kurama looked at his nails and at his arms. "Dammit…"

'Well?' Youko spoke harshly.

Kurama held his head. "Go away…"

He ran into the bathroom, sick to his stomach. He vomited, barely missing the toilet.

~*After every hit we take*~

'Youko's back… no… no…' Kurama whispered to himself.

He slumped down on the wall. "No…"

~*Every feeling that I get,

But I haven't missed you yet*~

Kurama coughed, leaning toward the toilet again. "Why is this happening?!"

Kuroibara walked into the room. "Shuichi? Are you okay…?"

"No…" Kurama shook his head. "No!"

~*Every room mate kept awake,

By every sigh and scream we make*~

"I woke up to something from here… are you sure you are okay?"

"Yes… yes…"

~*Every feeling that I get,

But I haven't missed you yet*~

"Is this your friend?"

"No… no… it's not that… I… I don't seem to miss him much…"

Kuroibara looked at him, concerned. "There's a vending machine. Why don't I get you something… like a soda?"

"Hai… that'd be great…"

Kuroibara left.

~*Only when I stop to think about you*~

*click* he closed the door.

Kurama started to cry. He rubbed away his tears and moaned.

"Hi… Hiei… Youko…"

~*I

Hate

Everything about you*~

"I HATE YOU!" Kurama threw a soap dispenser at the mirror. Just like before when he punched one at home, it shattered. "I HATE YOU ALL!!"

He ran out of the room and threw around Kuroibara's futon. It slammed against the wall, pulling down a picture he had up.

"HIEI! YOUKO! ALL OF YOU! WHY DO YOU CARE?!"

~*Why

Do I

Love you?*~

He threw papers from the floor. He crinkled and shredded them. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

He cried and screamed. "WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO GET CAUGHT?! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGH!"

~*Every time we lie awake,

After every hit we take*~

"It… It couldn't be just me. Youko has to be a part of me. Hiei has to die for me. Kuroibara has to suffer because of me," he said quieter.

"WHY?!" Kurama screamed. "WHY ME, INARI-SAMA?! WHAT DID I DO?! WHAT DID HIEI DO?! WHAT DID KUROIBARA DO?!"

~*Every feeling that I get,

But I haven't missed you yet*~

"I don't miss them… but I pity them, right…?" Kurama whispered.

~*Only when I stop to think about it*~

"Hiei… Hiei… I miss Hiei…" Kurama hissed. "I miss Hiei… he is gone from my life and I miss him… because I was greedy and wanted him… I brought this upon myself… If I just ignored him like everyone else… he would've commited suicide and died so much earlier… and I wouldn't be like this…"

He took the picture he dropped. "No one would be how they are!"

He smashed it again. It felt good.

~*I

Hate

Everything about You*~

He kept on smashing the things in the little apartment. He threw the table to the ground out of frustration. He then pulled the phone out of the wall, the wires falling in random areas.

~*Why

Do I

Love You?*~

He threw tons of things. He didn't care. He threw glasses and plastic cups he found in a cabinet. He found a few forks that got stuck in the wall. Knives were used to see if they were sharp enough to rip skin. If not, they just were thrown and stuck into the wall.

~*I

Hate

Everything about you*~

To think, he was only frustrated.

~*Why

Do I

Love you?*~

He shoved chairs to the ground. He cried and blood splattered on his face.

His blood.

He screamed and threw more things.

Did he care that the stuff was not his own?

Did he care that he was waking up everyone?

Yes, but he was so broken, he just couldn't stop.

~*Only when I stop to think about you I know*~

"Shuichi!" Kuroibara screamed.

He ran to restrain the infuriated young man.

"Get away!" Kurama screamed, "I don't want to think about you!"

Kuroibara panicked. "What's wrong with you?!"

Kurama's blood splashed across his wounds and body. He didn't think about all those diseases he could get by that. He had to calm Kurama down.

"Shuichi! Shuichi! Stop! You are going to kill yourself!"

"I don't care!" Kurama hollered.

"Shuichi! Onegai!"

Kurama began to calm down. His knees let out and he fell to the ground. Kuroibara quickly closed the strange wounds on Kurama's arms.

"That's surely to leave scars…" Kuroibara hissed.

Kurama shook.

"Why did you do this?"

"I… I really can't tell you…"

~*Only when you start to think about me you know*~

"Shuichi, do you hate yourself so much you hate everyone else?"

"No… I hate myself so much that I care for everyone else… they never care back… or live…"

"Shuichi…"

~*I

Hate

Everything about you*~

"Just leave me to die… just kill me… kill me, Kuroibara! Kill me!"

"No! I won't do that!"

~*Why

Do I

Love you?*~

Kurama stumbled up. "Ah… ah… just let me go…"

"No," Kuroibara said again, this time with anger and force. "No. I will not let you leave like this Shuichi… no…"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because, and I am not trying to sound like a hypocrite, not everyone deserves to die. Some people have purpose. You do."

"No I don't!" Kurama screamed.

~*You

Hate

Everything about me*~

"I…" Kuroibara stared.

"I don't! Everything I do backfires! The person I cared for died… he hated me when he died! He hated what I became… everyone hates what I am… and I do too! I don't want to be this! But I can't stop being like this!"

"There are people that can help…"

"What can they do? They can't go into my mind…"

"I take meds and I feel fine… you can get some, Kurama, we can make it better…"

"It's more than that, Kuroibara! It's more than just depression! It's more than just suicidal thoughts! It much deeper!"

"Please! Just try!"

"No! I refuse!"

"I want to help you! I don't want you to die!"

"Why? Do you suddenly care or something? Don't tell me you are really depressed… you are surely not…"

"Look, it's okay to want to die. But it's another story about when you try… we all want to die because we will sooner or later… but, Shuichi… just…"

"I'm not!"

~*I hate

You hate

I hate

You love me*~

"There are people that love you, Shuichi! There are people that care about you! Do you really want to leave them sad like that?"

"Yes!"

~*I

Hate

Everything about you

Why

Do I

Love you?*~

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

That came from my very soul. I am very mad. I just had to get that out. It is a little cliff-hanger like… I guess… but please review to make me feel better…

Thanks…

Peace,♥, and ♂ that look like ♀,

Gabbi: Queen of Kurama Torture.

PS: FRODO LIVES!