Their Fault

Hah...well...this chapter is just being made up as it goes along. I didn't even bother to plan this one out, but I was in the mood to write some more.

To some of my reviewers::

XxXCocoPuffXxX – Im glad you like my fic! Makes me happy lol

NeonNights – good to hear that it doesn't suck! I think I might do some art for this story and post it up on my site, since I still think my art rawks more then my writing abilitys lol

SnuffSnuff - Yeah, it IS a rather angst ridden fic...which is what I was aiming for lol Ive never really done an angst fic before but its been fun so far! And yes...it will be updated often

Onward with the fic!!

Disclaimer – I don't own South Park or any of the characters except for whoever I make up

"Stupid Pip..." I mumbled.

I brought my knees up to my chest and let the tips of my shoes dangle over the edge of the bench. I shivered as a gust of wind blew by me.

Should I tell Stan and Kyle how I feel about that bitch replacing me? I should...but I'm not going to.

I watched as Craig slapped the puck across the frozen pond towards the goal, but Kyle stopped it in time and smacked it back.

I sighed. I really did want to play. But not with that bitch around. She cant even hold a hockey stick right!!! Urrrrgh!!! (A.N I know nothing about hockey == lol)

I turned away from the game, the site of her acting like an idiot disgusted me. I kept blinking and rubbing my eyes. They had started to water, which was common for me. But when I'm out in public and it happens, people think I'm crying. I don't cry.

Out on the ice, I heard a whistle blow, signaling that the game was over. That was a fast one.

It was about 10 minutes before Stan, Kyle and an unwanted parasite came over to my bench.

"Dude, I still can't believe we got our ass' kicked." Kyle said

"Heh, that's cause someone doesn't know how to hit a hockey puck." Stan teased.

"Aw, c'mon you two!" Victoria giggled. "Don't blame it all on my bad aim!"

"Ok, we'll blame part of it on your bad aim, and the other part on your ability to not know which goal is which." laughed Kyle.

"What the hell are you crying about now, Mattie?" Victoria asked in a sneering voice.

"Yeah, what's up?"

I blinked and felt the wet tears fall from my eyes.

"I'm not crying."

"Yeah, that's why you have tears streaming down your face, right?" Kyle said still laughing.

I frowned.

"Fuck you."

"C'mon guys, I think we should leave the baby alone." Victoria said, grabbing Kyle's hand and dragging him away.

"How come your not leaving?" I said angrily to Stan.

"Cause I wanna know what's wrong." He said, sitting down next to me.

"Jesus tap dancing Christ! There's nothing wrong with me! Why does everyone think there is?! First my aunt, and now you guys!"

He was silent for a minute.

"Do you still have your headache?"

"No."

"Your lying." He said.

"No I'm not!"

"Mattie, you might not realize it, but whenever you lie, you bite your lip. That's why you don't get away with anything." Stan pointed out.

I stopped biting it.

"So what? Big fucking deal, I have a headache. Is that a crime?" I said as my eyes continued to water.

I rubbed them.

"Why are you crying?"

"I'm not. My eyes water when I get a headache. There's nothing I can do about it, but wait until it goes away." I mumbled while I closed my eyes.

Stan patted my head.

"Do you want me to take you home?" he asked. I think he felt bad for making me come when he knew I wasn't feeling good.

I nodded and we stood up.

Just as we started to walk away, Kyle came running up.

"Where you guys goin?"

"I'm taking Mattie home, she still has a headache."

"I thought you said it went away." Kyle said, turning to me.

I shrugged. "Well, I lied."

"I'll come with you guys!"

That surprised me a bit...that he didn't want to stay here with Victoria.

"Ok."

So it was just the 3 of us again, walking to my house. It should have felt good. But it didn't. This is what I wanted. I didn't want Victoria around, hanging all over my best friends. I just wanted it to be the 3 of us, like old times.

But...it was never the 3 of us...it was always the 5 of us...

I felt my eyes water again, and the tears slid down my face. Either Kyle and Stan didn't notice, or they just figured my eyes were watering again.

But this time I really was crying.

When we got to my house, Kyle and Stan followed me inside. All I did was grab the blanket hanging off the couch and flopped down with it on me. I curled myself up and sighed.

My nose felt numb and I sniffled. Was it from the cold outside, or was I getting sick?

Kyle slipped a glove off his hand and felt my forehead.

"She has a fever."

I weakly pushed his hand away. "Whoopee..."

Stan sat down in the recliner and Kyle sat next to me.

"Do you want anything?" Stan asked.

A better life?

Why am I so angsty?

"No..."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Was I really running a fever? I felt my beanie being slipped off my head and felt Kyle's fingers in my hair.

Why was I letting him even sit near me? I was so pissed at him! What the fuck is wrong with me?

But for some reason, I didn't tell him to stop. It felt nice to have someone stroke my hair like that again.

I fell asleep soon after.

I woke up to dark house. I slowly sat up and stretched. My headache had finally disappeared and there was no telling when the next one would show up.

I glanced at the VCR for the time:: 3 AM

Wow...I slept along time.

I got up and walked to the kitchen, the chicken still out on the counter.

"Shit."

It was totally defrosted and there was water all over the table from it.

I picked it up and shoved it back in the freezer. I'd make it tomarrow.

I grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it up with water before trudging upstairs.

I opened my aunts door to check to see if she was asleep yet. But her room was empty.

Next to her bed on the dresser, the answering machine flashed red.

I walked in and pressed button.

"I don't know where you are, Mattie, but don't bother to make that chicken tonight. This stupid shoot is going to take longer then planned. I have to spend the next few nights here, you can order out till I get home. Love you, talk to you later."

I sighed as the message ended. I hated my aunt's job sometimes. She was a model and had to go to shoots often.

As a kid I would have to spend days at either Kyle or Stan's house since I was afraid Cartman would eat me if I stayed at his, and Kenny was too poor.

I decided to be lazy and instead of walking across the hall to my own room, I ripped back the cover of my aunts bed, and decided to sleep there instead since I was still really tired.

I jumped when the phone rang and brought me out of my sleep. It was loud and right next to my ear...

I reached out, picked it up and slammed it back down.

Serves them right for waking me up. I put my head back on the pillow and drew the blankets up closer to my chin. It was only October, but here in South Park, it's cold all the time.

But the phone rang again. I growled into the pillow before picking it up on the 3rd ring.

"Hello?" I said in a groggy voice.

"Hello, Mattie dear, its Mrs. Marsh."

Oops...

"Hi Mrs. Marsh."

"Are you alright?"

I took the phone away from my ear and looked at it in a funny way.

"Um, yeah. Why?"

"Well, Stanley told me that you were running a fever yesterday, and your aunt called me from Nevada last night and asked me to check up on you until she gets home."

"Oh. Well, yeah, I'm fine."

"Alrighty then, I'll talk to you later. Good bye."

"Bye Mrs. Marsh."

I hung the phone up and shoved my head back on to the pillow. I let out a rather loud cough and pulled the blanket over my head.

When my coughing fit had subsided a bit, I decided to take my medicine. So I got up and forced myself down the stairs.

In the kitchen, I grabbed another glass and filled it once more with water and grabbed my pills.

The doorbell rang.

"Jesus Christ..."

Bringing my pills with me, I shuffled to the front door and flung it open.

"Mornin'!"

"Why the fuck are you always so chipper in the morning?"

"Dunno!" Stan said as he walked into the heated house. "Why you always so grouchy?"

"Dunno. Here open these" I said tossing him the bottle.

"Jeez, your retarded." He told me as he easily opened it and handed the bottle back to me.

I took out a pill and popped it in my mouth.

"What are you happy about anyway?" I asked.

"Tammy's coming back early." He said with a big smile.

I rolled my eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothin'."

"Then why'd you roll your eyes?"

"Because...I can? Free country, dumbass."

"Do you have a problem with Tammy or something?" he asked me.

"No, but I have a problem with her parasite."

"You mean Vicky?"

I glared at him.

"No, I mean Victoria."

"Dude, there's nothing wrong with her you know." Stan stated as he once more took his rightful place in the recliner.

I sat down on the couch. "Yes there is."

"No there isn't. You gotta give her a chance. She's really a great person."

"Stan, have you noticed the way she treats me?" I asked in a serious voice.

"Dude, she's just kidding." He said, waving his hand back and forth. "That's just the way she is."

I looked away.

"Can I tell you something?"

"Yeah, what?"

Pip, I swear to God, if he laughs, I'm gonna stick you right in the goddamn mouth.

"I'm gonna be honest, Stan." I said, taking a deep breath. "I...I er."

"What is it?"

"I feel hurt."

"..."

I glanced over at Stan, but I couldn't read his face.

"And...and replaced."

"..."

"Jesus Christ Stan! Say something!" I yelled as I stood up and put my hands on my hips.

He snorted. He was trying to hold a laugh in!

"Why are you laughing?!?!"

"I...I'm not" he said.

But he snorted again. And then he let go, and just started to laugh.

"Its not funny goddamn it!!!"

"Y-yes it is!!"

I glared at Stan, and after a minute he stopped laughing.

"Sorry." He said, wiping his eyes. "Its just...I never thought you could actually feel anything."

I gaped at him.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"No."

"Stan, that's the most heartless thing you've ever said to me. You have no idea how much you just sounded like Cartman!!" I told him in an icy voice.

"Don't compare me to that dick." He said.

"Well why not huh? I shouldn't feel bad about it. I mean, I don't actually feel anything, right? Didn't you just say that?"

Stan stood up and faced me.

"What the hell is your problem, Mattie?! All I did was laugh!"

"What the hell is YOUR problem?! I was trying to talk to you, tell you how I feel. I thought I could tell you anything because you're my friend!"

"Well...maybe you thought wrong!!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that maybe I don't wanna be your friend anymore!"

"Jesus, Stan, what are you? 4?! You don't want to be my friend because I was trying to tell you how I felt for once?"

"No. I don't want to be your friend because you're a bitch."

I stared at him.

"I am not a bitch."

"Yes you are! Ever since Kenny died and Cartman moved, you...your so freakin bitchy and grouchy! Kyle and I cant stand it anymore! You don't think anyones good enough for you, every one is below your level! You don't want to do anything but sit in front of your TV and complain about eyeaches! Get out and do something for once! It been hell for us to see you like this, but we just cant take it Mattie! We feel like you hate us." he yelled.

I closed my eyes.

When I opened them, I looked down at my scarred hands.

"Hell, Stan? You'll never know what hell is like!!! And while we're on the topic of feeling hate, I'd like to put my word in on that! I don't hate you or Kyle, but I must admit, I am rather annoyed with you two at the time being! But hate? No. That emotion belongs to Victoria! You don't know what its like to not have any friends for 8 years and then finally gain some to suddenly loose them!

"I lost Kenny to death, Cartman to California, you to your girlfriend and I'm loosing Kyle to Victoria! I know I couldn't stop death from taking Kenny, or stop Cartman from moving, but you and Kyle are all I have left, and I feel like your leaving me for 2 girls you just met a few months ago!"

By this time I was in tears. I don't cry...

"As for my eye aches, I cant stop them! I have no control over them! So I cant help the fact that I get them so often that I cant go outside. But the least you and Kyle could do is come visit me while I'm sick!"

"What the hell do you think I've been doing, huh, Mattie? I've been coming over everyday this week to see you!" Stan yelled back.

"Yeah, Stan. This WEEK. What about last week? Or last weekend? How about the week before that when I was sick? Where were you then? Oh, lets try with Tammy!"

"She's my girlfriend! Whats your point?!"

"You only make time for me when shes not around! That's my point! And Kyle hasn't come over at all in the past few weeks, except for yesterday when you guys walked me home."

"I don't need this shit Mattie." Stan said. He walked towards the door.

"This isn't shit Stan, its freakin serious!!"

"No, Mattie. It really isn't."

He slammed the door.

I dropped down on the couch, and rubbed my throat. It was sore from screaming.

How could he say that to me? Im not a bitch... am I?

I shook my head. No! I'm not! I have every right to be mad. Im not gonna let that bother me.

I didn't want to think about it. It wasnt even noon yet.

I laid on the couch, and fell asleep.

Aw, what a fun chapter Mattie and Stan got in their first major fight. I think I made Mattie a bit toooooo angsty in this ch... ah well.