A/N: this is sorta Buffy reflecting while her mom's in the hospital. song is "Hello" by Evanescence. please review! hope you like it!
Hello
Buffy sat in Sunnydale Hospital's waiting room, waiting for information about her mother.
Playground school bell rings again
Rain clouds come to play again
Has no one told she's not breathing?
She looked around at her friends. They had helped her so much with all their comfort and support.
Hello I'm your mind giving you
Someone to talk to
Hello
She couldn't believe all this was happening to her. Her mom in the hospital.... Glory reeking havoc..... Spike back and not planning on leaving any time soon...... Riley starting to drift away.......
If I smile and don't believe
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken
Hello I'm the lie living for you so you can hide
Don't cry
Inside she was crying and screaming, outside she was sober. Everyone assumes that just because I'm pretty and athletic, I have the perfect life. God, I see more death, violence, destruction, chaos, and evil than anybody has a right to. I'm not meant to be happy. I'm not meant to be loved. I'm not meant to be successful. I'm not meant to be normal. I'm not meant to have a long life. I'm not meant to have normal friends or boyfriends. I'm not meant to have joy. I'm not meant to grow up and have children. I'm meant to fight evil. I'm a killer. It's what I do. I seek and destroy all forces of evil. I have a mission to rid the world of evil and the only rule is: I fight till I die. That's how it works. Then another is called to take my place. I can't call a timeout or call it quits. I fight a never ending battle. No matter how many I kill, I'll still die. No matter how many apocalypses I thwart, the world will end. It is inevitable. No one can stop it, not even me. My job isn't about what or who I like. Demons don't care. To them a Slayer is a Slayer, nothing more or less different than any other. I won't be remembered for who I was; I'll be remembered for what I did. Who I fought. Who I defeated. Why I failed and died. We're warriors. Most teenage girls' biggest problem is 'what am I going to wear?' ours is 'when am I going to die?' it's on our minds all the time. When will we die? Who will kill us? What was our fault? We have love but fate isn't kind and leaves us alone, forsaken by those who said they loved us. We have to deal when people we love die, no matter what. We can't mourn them if we have a job to do. We can't be successful if we spend all our free time training and patrolling instead of studying. I'm not normal. I've died, yet I still live. I'm small, yet I'm stronger than most jocks. I'm beautiful, yet I'm also deadly. If I break a bone it will be okay in a few days, most others it takes weeks. Most people run away from danger or of something they fear, but I, I have to face it straight on and fight, not knowing if I'm going to survive. I'm the nightmares' worst fear. I'm the Slayer.
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping
Hello I'm still here
All that's left of yesterday
My life is meant to be hell.