Chapter Nine

"No. I don't think that is a wise idea," he protested.

"I remember not so long ago you would have jumped at the chance," she teased, trying to get him to lighten his mood...see things her way...be sensible.

"That was a long time ago..."

"No it wasn't, stud." She was still trying to get him to lighten up.

"No. No, Jordan...I can stay on the couch."

She was tired. It had been a long day. And the hell with his macho self-deprivation. He needed sleep and so did she. Hands on her hips she walked over to where he was sitting and looked down at him.

"No," she said in her sternest voice.

He quickly rose from the couch, towering his full six foot plus figure over her. "Jordan.." he began.

Just as swiftly she put one hand to his chest and pushed him back down on the couch. "No. This one issue will be done my way. While you've been in my apartment before, you've never been in here blind. You may need to get up quickly...you may need me. And if I'm in one room and you're in another, I may not hear you. You know what a sound sleeper I am. We are sleeping together until we both feel comfortable that you can manage by yourself. Am I clear on this?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good....and no more lip from you Detective Hoyt. Let me do the dinner dishes and I'll run you a bath."

"Do I get a rubber ducky?"

"Funny, Woody...."

Still chuckling she went back into the kitchen. She had won a major battle without hurting him too much.

He would never know what a difficult decision it was for her to make...sleeping with him... being close to him again, and not needing to touch him. Despite the fact that Devan was gone...he still wasn't hers. She had no right to show him anything other than compassion.

A few minutes later, she emerged and ran his bath water. "Think you can manage getting in and out of the tub?" she asked after she let him feel his way around the bathroom.

"What happens if I fall?"

"I won't let you drown," she smirked and closed the bathroom door. She sat in the bedroom while he bathed. A few minutes later, he was finished. "My clothes, Jordan?" he asked.

"Right here...hang on."

She handed him his sleep pants and t-shirt. After he got dressed, she tucked him in. "Where are you going?" he asked, tugging on her arm.

"I'll be right in the living room. I need to check my e-mail before turning in."

And she did need to check her e-mail. But she also wanted to give him time to go to sleep before she crawled in the bed with him. She was afraid it may be too awkward right now...and she wanted him to rest. An hour later, she went into check on him. The pizza, beer, and warm bath worked the trick she wanted. He was sound asleep. A thought pricked her conscious. She had forgotten to check his bedsores. But he had taken a bath...that would have cleaned them. She would dress them tomorrow.

Right now she had to get undressed and ready for bed. She changed into her girl boxers and a tank top and brushed out her hair. She hesitated before she crawled in under the covers. She was sleeping with Woody. Despite his blindness, despite the bandages that still covered his eyes, her mouth still went dry every time she looked at him. He was a gorgeous man. Gently, she eased down beside him, holding her breath, trying her best not to wake him up. He needed to rest. She turned her back to his, fighting the desire...the impulse to wrap her arms around him and hold him. He's not yours anymore, she sternly reminded herself as she drifted off to sleep.

And woke up several hours later, with him spooning her against his body, his arm possessively wrapped around her waist. Gently, she tried to disengage herself from his grip, but it did no good. He only tightened his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. Oh God,... she thought, if this is the way the next few weeks are going to be...damn. He's going to make it difficult for me to tell him goodbye. I'll miss him too much when he's gone.

But what are you going to do about it now? She heard her conscious ask.

Enjoy the hell out of it, was the only sensible thing she could come up with.

Woody woke the next morning feeling much better, even if his world was still dark. And it was getting better all the time, as he awoke to the sensation of a very feminine body curled up next to his. She was still there. He had felt her and heard her when she had gotten in bed with him last night. He had noted her hesitation before she climbed into bed. He had feigned sleep in order to make her comfortable. She needed to rest. God knows she did. He had been a bear to take care of at times...sometimes even crossing the line into being a bastard. He had made a vow to be nicer. Especially after all she did for him.

He didn't take for granted the planning she did for lunch or dinner. Or the beer. It was all for him to make him feel normal...whole again. He had wanted to do something for her...he wasn't sure what, until a thought hit him. She had told him, some time back that she felt the safest in his arms. It was after the Malden incident, after Max had left Boston. He had gone to the Pogue at closing, to make sure she got to her car safely. She had closed up. He had slid two quarters in the jukebox and asked her to dance. He had picked a slow song and had held her closely...when the song was over, she had made no effort to move out of his arms. So he had held her and softly asked what was wrong.

"Nothing," she had replied.

"You sure?" he had asked.

"I just feel safest when I'm in your arms," she had finally confessed, hiding her face in his shirt and snuggling closer.

Damn him. He should have taken her home and made love to her right then and there. Instead, they both had hesitated. And here they were now. He still may have been blind, even if they were together, but at least there wouldn't have been this rift between them...there wouldn't have been Devan.

So he did what he could for her now. He had rolled over, pulled her to him and held her...hoping somewhat to convey to her that even without his sight, she was safe ... safe with him and from anything that might harm her. It was still early, he drifted back off to sleep, still holding her...still pondering his past...and what part it may play in his future.