Chapter Eleven

They didn't talk much heading back home. Woody didn't have to wear the bandages any longer, but did have to wear dark sunglasses when he was outside. And if the florescent light inside a room bothered him, he would have to wear them indoors, also.

He was upset. Jordan knew that. But she also knew that he couldn't expect to have regained his sight this quickly. It took months for the optic nerves to heal. If they ever did. She and the doctor had exchanged knowing glances when Woody expressed his frustration. Dr. Little had lectured him on the fragility of optic nerves and the healing time, but it did little to relieve Woody's impatience or his anger.

The doctor had pulled Jordan aside as the nurses had helped Woody pick out sunglasses. "You're doing a great job," he said. "He's gained weight...his color is good."

"Thanks," she had replied, "I just can't give him back what he really wants."

"No one can...except maybe time. You do realize how hard this is going to be on you...how depressed, moody, he's going to be..."

"Yeah. I know. I'm experiencing it now."

Dr. Little had smiled grimly. "Oh no, you haven't. Chances are, it's going to get worse."

She had swallowed hard. "Thanks."

"Just don't say I didn't warn you. If you need to talk to someone about it, call my office and ask for me or one of the nurses. We'll be glad to talk you down out of a tree."

"Before I saw off the limb I'm on?"

The doctor had grinned. "Yeah."

So now they were heading home. Then Jordan got an idea. On an impulse, she pulled into the parking lot of the park that was between her office and Woody's. "Where are we at?" he asked.

"The park. Come on. Let's go for a walk...get you outside for a while."

"I don't think so..."

"No. Woody, come on. You've been inside now for nearly two weeks. You need fresh air and sunshine. I need fresh air and sunshine."

She opened his door and helped him out. "I'm not carrying my cane," he warned. He hated the thing that marked him as disabled...different...half a man, in his mind.

"You don't have to, cowboy. Keep your glasses on and take my arm. People will think we're just another couple in the park for lunch." She put her arm in the crook of his and gently steered him toward the sidewalk. "Now there's the curb," she softly whispered. "That's right...step up. See...you're doing great."

It did feel good to be out...the breeze...the sun...her on his arm. They stopped for hot dogs and sodas. Life seemed normal, at least for the moment. After eating, they walked through the park, looking like a typical couple, her whispering in his ear. But instead of sweet nothings, it was directions. Curb here. Rough sidewalk there. Kids or ducks in front of you. But it worked. He got some exercise and so did she. All too soon, they were back at Jordan's car and were heading home.

She got him inside again and he made for the couch. He was tired. More tired than he let on...the doctor's office and the park had taken a toll on him. Soon he was asleep. At least with the sunglasses and not the bandages, Jordan knew he was sleep. His eyes were closed. Plus he was snoring. She smiled at him fondly, gently easing his glasses off his face.

She loved him. Dear Jesus, how she loved him. But she still didn't know how he felt about her any longer. She knew some of his mood swings were normal for the trauma he was going through. She just didn't know if it was all the result of the accident any longer. Did he miss Devan? Was that one of the reasons he was so moody? He missed her and was frustrated that she wasn't Devan? She wished she knew for sure...at least before she gave her heart completely away to this man again.

In one sense she was equally as frustrated. She had taken that wall down between them and he hadn't noticed...he had paid no attention to her attitude toward him...didn't the man have a clue about how she felt toward him? Or did he care? Was her new-found softness for him for nothing? She sighed. She'd have to wait this one out. First, they had to get his sight back. Then, she'd ask him how he felt really towards her. Meanwhile, she had work to do. Nigel had brought over a stack of files that Garrett wanted her to close out. So while Woody was sleep, she spread the files out on her kitchen counter and set to work, moving from the kitchen to her computer in the den. Woody was sleeping soundly. The noise shouldn't bother him.

Consumed by her work, she didn't notice when Woody woke up. Her nose was buried in files, her computer screen full...he had the opportunity to observe her without her noticing. Or at least listen to her. He heard the computer going and the sound of her flipping through files. She was working. Other than that noise and the sound of her soft breathing there was nothing to hear. But he could smell her perfume. Lavender and vanilla. An old-fashioned scent, but one that surprisingly suited Jordan. It was unique, like she was. She was the only person he knew that wore that perfume, and she wore it well. It lingered. On her. On her files. On his shirt from where she had held his arm this afternoon. Hell, if the truth be known, half his suit coats smelled of her perfume...they had worked so closely together. Before Devan, Jordan and he almost insisted on working together...they thought alike in many ways about cases. But she had an insight he didn't have...she had called in woman's intuition...he had just called it smart. He sighed to himself. He didn't know if they would ever have the opportunity to work together again. He had no idea how much he had missed it.

She was going to have to go back to work at the end of next week. He knew that. Garrett couldn't afford to give her any more time off. He wasn't sure what he was going to do then. He knew they'd work through it. Maybe by then she'd trust him by himself in her apartment. Maybe he could go home. Maybe, by any chance of luck, he'd have his sight back.

And maybe he'd drive himself crazy wondering about her. Who was she working with? What detective? Woody had never been jealous over Jordan...but now he was. He knew she was taking care of him now out of the compassion of her heart...but he was also wise to the fact that she probably didn't want to be saddled with a blind man for the rest of her life. And he surely wouldn't do that to her. After everything that Jordan had been through, she deserved someone who wouldn't burden her. But still...it was driving him crazy, thinking who she might end up with...would he be good to her...how would she feel about him?

And how would he feel about another man touching her? Waking up with her in his arms in the morning was both heaven and hell. She felt good....and it felt right...but she would ease out ever so gently in the morning to try to keep from waking him. Lot of good that did her. He had been awake long before she stirred. Enjoying holding her...enjoying her closeness. Wondering when it would end and dreading the time that it would.

He would have to be able to live on his own. Soon. He knew he wasn't able to right now...his body was still healing from the after shocks of the explosion. He tired easily. But he'd have to be able to cope. He would have to. He needed to start easing his way out of her life...for her own good.