Chapter 9

Invisible Blame

Sara watched Brass bring in an angry Anthony Lopez and inched closer to Nick. She wasn't sure if she could handle this. Warrick began, asking about the story and pushing the subject of Amanda and Bekki. She shivered and Nick ushered her out of the room, muttering an apology to Catherine and Grissom. He walked her outside and pulled her into his arms. She burst into tears.

"What's wrong with me?" Sara whispered suddenly when her sobs had died down. Nick pulled back, surprised at her question.

"Sara, nothing is wrong with you." He took her face in his palms and made her look at him.

"Catherine told me about Bekki, about her talk with you, and look at how strong you're being for that little girl, honey."

"It should be me in that morgue, not Amanda," Sara said, a fresh wave of tears blurring her vision. "Look at what happened to Catherine. The bastard held a gun to her head! All to get to me, to find me, to make Amanda suffer!" Nick's mind worked frantically to process everything Sara was saying.

"Where would Bekki go?"

"Catherine's a better mother than me."

"You don't know that, Sair. You've never been a mom."

"I should have been in that hospital, I should have been with Amanda so she knew Bekki would be okay."

"Sara, she knows. She trusted you with her life—"

"And now she's dead!" Nick had known it was a bad choice of words but continued anyway.

"And she trusts you unconditionally with Bekki's. Nothing, I repeat, nothing is wrong with you Sara, and none of us blame you for Amanda's death."

"I do."

-

Sara walked into the holding cell where Anthony Lopez was being kept.

"Sara?" She allowed her breath to rush out of her lungs in relief at his subdued tone of voice.

"Tony."

"Can you do me a favour?" The eyes that met hers were not those of the crazy murdered she'd seen in the interrogation room. His expression held remorse and a touch of self-loathing. Sara found herself giving in.

"Amanda's will… I'm supposed to have Bekki," he said.

"You can't if you're in jail."

"Which is where I'm headed. You'll take care of her, right? You'll take care of Bekki?" Sara smiled softly. A part of her was apprehensive about taking a clone of her dead best friend, more importantly of taking a child in general, but he'd asked her so sincerely.

"Yeah," she said finally. "I'll take Bekki."

I'm sorry this took so long and that it's so short. I've been swamped with work (still am but its Saturday and I've got hours this afternoon to do it while I'm sitting bored in a drama practice) but I'm making an exception for this chapter because I wanna put it up.

Hope you enjoyed!

Kavi Leighanna