This is Jesse's POV, flashing back a little, then going forward. Hope you guys like it!!!

Jesse's POV:

Pregnant. That spawn of Satan first wed, then took to bed MY querida. She is with child, growing more lovely every day. If I hadn't been so stupid, if I hadn't listened to the priest, then perhaps she would be mine. I would have been the one to hold her during her illness. I would have been the one to lie with her for the first time.

But I listened to Father Dominic. He told me that a relationship between myself and Susannah would not be right. So after that kiss in the graveyard, I left. I watched Susannah from afar, invisible, seeing her cry when I was gone for so long, seeing the cancer take over. Seeing how she confided in no one but Slater, seeing how she became closer to him in so many ways. Seeing how she loved him with all her heart, all her soul, and traditionally, her body...It tore me up to see her so in love.

Yet, at the same, had Susannah been miserable, I would have been just as torn up, if not more so.

I watched Susannah as she braved life, raising at first a little boy the spitting image of Slater, followed by twin girls with their mothers' emerald eyes. Her love for him never wavered; if anything, she loved him more with each passing day.

After many years, playing Guardian Angel to Susannah and her offspring, I began to wonder if I had missed my chance to move on. If Susannah was why I was here so long, and I had passed it up, then would I forever remain on Earth?

"Mommy, Mommy!"

"Yes, Sarah?" Susannah asked, between fixing lunch for her eldest.

"Amber took my Barbie and won't give it back!"

"Did not!" Cried the indignant Amber, her emerald eyes flashing much like Susannah's used to when she got angry. "You took my Barbie and I took it back from you!"

"I did not!"

"Did so!"

"Did not!"

"So!"

"NOT!!!"

"Girls, Stop arguing!" Susannah said firmly. She knelt down to their five-year-old heights and said, "I clearly remember buying each of you separate Barbies. Remember, we went to the store, and you each picked out the ones you liked?"

"Yeah but she took-"

"Sarah, you got the blonde-haired Barbie, remember?" Susannah finished, shushing her daughter. "And this one," Susannah held up the brunette Barbie Amber was holding onto fiercely, "Has brown hair."

"What's this I see?" Paul said jollily, holding up a blonde doll.

"Daddy! You found it!" Sarah cried, the fight over and the now happy girls returning to their afternoon of games.

"You, my dear, are a miracle worker." Susannah said, standing from her crouching position and rubbing her back.

"Only when it comes to finding lost toys." Paul laughed. He took over rubbing the lower part of Susannah's back, where it ached, and they laughed and giggled over something. I treasured Susannah's laughter, the rich velvet of it, the way it rang out, spreading happiness.

If only I hadn't made a fool of myself to her! She would never speak to me should I show myself, she acted cold the days she did, and I often entertained the idea of having Father Dominic exorcise me.

I sighed invisibly, and Susannah tensed.

"Suze? You Ok?" Paul asked, rubbing her shoulders now.

"I just got this cold feeling." Susannah answered. "Like, there's a ghost here, but they don't want to reveal themselves."

"Probably just Rico." Slater said, leaning in and kissing her neck. "You know he's never moved on."

"Yeah, I know." Susannah sighed, and shook herself. She packed away her son Peter's lunch, and started to clean up the kitchen.

"Thank god it's the weekend." Susannah said as she wiped down the table. "Are you positive Jack doesn't mind watching the kids? Aren't he and Marina doing something?"

"Suze, relax." Paul said, throwing the dishrag into the sink. "Jack and Marina are fine about watching the kids. They think it'll be good practice for when their kid is born."

"Yeah, two five-year-olds and an eight year old are about as hard to take care of as a newborn." Susannah laughed. "I just hope they're good at stopping fights. Sarah and Amber are arguement-crazy these days."

Hearing Susannah and Paul talk about their offspring was almost too much. Seeing Paul and Susannah start to become intimate (A/N: Not intimate as in having sex. Intimate as in kissing.) was too much for me, so with another sigh, I dematerialized.

Will I forever be damned to spend eternity watching the one woman I could have had, had I not been a fool?