Tomo: Well. That's no way to behave on your first day out.
Tamahome: (snickering at Nakago) of the closet.
(A gagged Nakago glares at Tamahome)
Chiriko: Wait, if he's gagged, how did he sing?
Nuriko: The same way Rocky manages to know what the Sword of Damocles is not five minutes after he's born.
dodger-chan: Even though he can't actually speak.
Tomo: If it's not a shout out, shut up.
Nuriko: If you're horny and you know it, bang the bars. (joined by others)
If you're horny and you know it, bang the bars.
If you're horny and you know it, and you really want to show it,
If you're horny and you know it bang the bars.
(Nakago slams his head into the bars repeatedly)
Nuriko: We knew it.
Tomo: I just love success.
Suboshi: He's a credit to your genius, Master.
Amiboshi: A triumph of your will.
Soi: (leaning on tank) He's okay.
Hotohori: He's not gay.
Tomo: Okay?
Nuriko: Not gay?
Miboshi: Get your tits OFF (Tomo slams tank, Soi jumps) my tank!
Miaka: What do you think of Nakago as a god?
Tomo: I think we can do better than that. (drags Nakago over to Miaka) What do you think of him?
Miaka: Well (looking at Tamahome) I don't like men with too many muscles.
Chiriko: Just one big one.
Tomo: I didn't make him for you!
Chichiri: She gets him anyway, no da!
Tomo: He carries the Charles Atlas seal of approval.
(Kouji pops up)
Kouji: Why, Kouji, what are you doing here? Well, since Tasuki's on ice, I thought I'd do a shout out for him. That's so nice of you, Kouji. Yes, I thought it was.
Describe Tamahome at the beach. (disappears)
Tomo: A weakling, weighing ninety-eight pounds.
Miaka: That's not very nice.
Tomo: Will get sand in his face, when kicked to the ground
Suboshi: In the balls.
Tomo: And soon at the gym
With a determined chin
The sweat from his pores
As he works for his cause
Will make him glisten
And gleam, and with massage
And just a little bit of steam. (runs his finger down Nakago's chest)
Nuriko: Missed it, missed it, now you gotta kiss it!
Tomo: He'll be pink and quite clean
He'll be a strong man
Oh, honey
Chorus: But the wrong man.
(Soi and Amiboshi drag out a pommel horse)
Tomo: He'll eat nutritious
Tamhome: Cum
Tomo: High protein
Tamahome: Cum
Tomo: And swallow raw-
Suboshi: Chicken cum
Tomo: -eggs
Try to build up his shoulders
His chest, arms and (smirk) legs
Such an effort
If he only knew of my plan
In just seven days
dodger-chan: A fucking week.
Chorus: I can make you a man
Tomo: (Kicks Nakago to the floor) He'll do press-ups
Tamahome: Nakago made a hole in the floor.
Suboshi: Nakago is a hole in the floor.
Tomo: And chin-ups
Do the snatch, clean and jerk
He thinks dynamic tension
Must be hard work
Nuriko: Remember that horse brutality we talked about? Here it is.
(Tomo mounts the pommel horse)pun intended
Tomo: Such strenuous living
Soi: Thrust
Tomo: I just don't understand
Soi: and thrust
Tomo: When in just seven days
Chichiri: And seven nights no da!
Tomo: I can make you a man...
(The freezer warning light starts to blink)
Ashitare: What happens when you leave meatloaf in the freezer for too long?
Soi: It goes bad!
(Tasuki burst from the freezer on a motorcycle with a saxophone instead of a tessin)
dodger-chan: Screaming from the freezer like a bat outta hell!
(as Tasuki tosses away his safety gear)
Yui: Fuck the goggles!
Chichiri: Fuck the helmet, no da!
Nuriko: Fuck you!
Tasuki: Whatever happened to Saturday night?
Miboshi: Sunday morning!
Tasuki: When you dressed up sharp
And you felt alright
It don't seem the same since cosmic light
Came into my life and I thought I was divine.
I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go
And listen to the music on the radio
A saxophone was blowing on a Rock and Roll show
We climbed in the back seat, really had a good time
Hot patootie, bless my soul
Really love that Rock and Roll
Nuriko: --sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
Chorus: Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
(saxophone solo)
Suboshi: Eat shit.
Amiboshi: And die.
Tasuki: (approaches Soi)My head used to swim from the perfume I smelled
Chiriko: Hey, Miser, take this. (Tasuki hands Tamahome the saxophone)
Miaka: And don't sell it.
Tamahome: I wasn't going to. (looks very disappointed)
Tasuki (half-heartedly embraces Soi)
My hands kinda fumbled with her white plastic belt
I'd taste her baby pink lipstick and that's when I'd melt
She'd whisper in my ear tonight she really was mine
Get back in front and put some hair oil on
Buddy Holly was singing his very last song
With your arms around your girl, you try to sing along
It felt pretty good...Whoo!
Really had a good time
Hot patootie, bless my soul
Really love that Rock and Roll
Chorus: Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
Hot patootie, bless my soul, with
Sex, drugs, and Rock and Roll
(saxophone solo with dance)
Soi: Step, step, step, kick. Step, kick. Step, kick. Kick, kick, kick, kick.
Chorus: Hot patootie, bless my soul
I really love that Rock and Roll
(Chours repeats as Tasuki rides the motorcycle around the lab, aiming at those he doesn't much care for.)
(Tomo locks Nakago in the elevator and grabs an icepick. Right as the song ends, he lunges at Tasuki with it and chases Tasuki back into the freezer. Soi shrieks.)
(Tomo stagers out of the freezer)
Hotohori: Killing people always makes me so dizzy.
Tomo: One from the vaults.
(Amiboshi peels off Tomo's bloody gloves)
Yui: Turn those inside out. We'll tell Miaka they're pop-tarts.
Miaka: Pop tarts? Where?
(Nakago struggles to break his bonds and escape from the elevator)
Nuriko: I'm pissed! I'm pissed! I'm pissed! I'm pissed! I'm pissed!
(Tomo opens the elevator door. Nakago backs away just a bit)
Tomo: There, there. Don't be upset.
Hotohori: He's not upset. He's pissed.
Tomo: Anyway, it was a mercy killing.
Suboshi: No, it was a messy killing.
Tomo: He had a certain naive charm, but no muscle)
(Tomo grabs Nakago's arm and places it in a flexed position)
Tomo: Oh!
But a deltoid and a bicep
Nuriko: What did you have for breakfast?
Miaka: Breakfast?
Tomo: A hot groin and a tricep
Makes me - Ooh!
(dances with Chiriko)
Chiriko: Wiggle with a midget.
Tomo: - shake
Makes me wanna take Charles Atlas by the hand
Soi: --by the balls.
Chorus: In just seven days
Tomo: Oh, baby
Chorus: I can make you a man
Tomo: I don't (kick) want no (kick) dissension
Just (kick) dynamic (kick) tension
Miboshi: Sing it pig!
Miaka: I'm a muscle fan
Yui: Who'd She have to eat to get a script?
Suboshi: And why didn't she eat the script too?
Chorus: In just seven days
I can make you a man
Tomo: Dig it if you can
Chorus: In just seven days
I can make you a man
(The wedding march is played as Tomo drags Nakago into the bridal suite)