GIVE UNTO ME
AUTHOR: Moon (aka HightyMightyHogwarts)
WHAT: Songfic
GENRE: Drama, angst
RATING: PG
PAIRING(S): Harry/Ginny
CHARACTER(S): Harry James Potter, Ginevra Molly Weasly
I might be the only one who realises just how much he goes trough, for I have been there once, too. That's strange, you know. Shouldn't his best friends know him like I do? Shouldn't his best friends see him like I see him? Yes, they should, I answer you. But they don't. They don't see his pain, his darkness, his craving. They don't, but I do. It breaks my heart seeing what he feels, what he has to endure day by day. Night by night. And all I can think of is how sorry I am, that I cannot take all of that away from him. I wish he could be a free boy, doing boyish things. I wish I could heal the whole inside his heart.
I've been watching you from a distance
The distance sees through your disguise
All I want from you is your hurting
I want to heal you
I want to save you from the dark
I would've give me own parents instead of his. I would've given my own brothers to give him family. I would give my own life to save his. I would carry his pain with me, just to let him feel the wonderful feeling that is happiness.
Give unto me your troubles
I'll endure your suffering
Place onto me your burden
I'll drink your deadly poison
But I'm in no position to do such thing. I'm just an ordinary friend. A friend who he passes and says hello to. A friend who he sees as his best friend's litlle sister. I'm not his best friend, not his study buddy, I'm not even his girlfriend. I'm his ordinary friend. Then why, why do I feel so sorry for him? Why do I see things and understand him so much more than other's do? Why should I even care?
Why should I care if they hurt you
Somehow it matters more to me
Than if I were hurting myself
Save you (save you)
I'll save you
The days have grown darker the last few months. And as I see the sun grow older, I see his eyes grow colder. He's losing himself, his losing himself within the grief, the War, the pain, the hatred, within the darkness. And nobody will save him, for nobody notices it. They don't even acknowledge it. I need to come in action and pull him back to the light.
It's after midnight. I walk my way down the girls dormitory leading to the Gryffindor Common Room, hoping to find him there. As I reach the bottom, I already see him. He sits on the most comfortable couch in the whole of the Common Room, staring at the fire. He appears to be lost in thought.
I stand here, mesmerized. Also, lost in thought. Staring at the back of his head in wonder. It's like I can see through him. Even the back of his head shows me how much pain he carries with him. I feel my heart shatter. He should not supposed to feel like this. What on earth did he do to feel so much pain? And above all things, I wonder, has God got nothing good or wonderful in store for him?
Give unto me your troubles
I'll endure your suffering
Place onto me your burden
I'll drink your deadly poison
Suddenly he jerks his head away from the fire, in my direction. His face is unreadable.
"Hi." I say, uncomfortable, giving a little wave with my hand.
"What are you doing down here?" he says, still not giving any sign of any kind of emotion.
"I – I Couldn't sleep." I lie. I'm actually here to talk to him. To comfort him and tell him everything will be OK.
Fear not the flame of my love's candle
Let it be the sun in your world of darkness
Give unto me all that frightens you
I'll have your nightmares for you
If you sleep soundly
He nods, turns his head away from me, back to the fire again.
"Oh" he says absentmindly, lost in thought again.
I slowly make my way across a big, comfortable chair placed next to the fire.
Silence. Absolute silence save for the crackling of the fire. It's haunting. But I know, that altough everything around us appears to be silent, that inside his head, there is noise. Noise, with the cries of people he loved, people who cared for him, who died for him. You can tell by looking at his eyes. Reflected behind them is control. He's trying to control his pain. O God how I feel for him. I bite back a sob and close my eyes as I shed one tear.
Give unto me your troubles
I'll endure your suffering
Place onto me your burden
I'll drink your deadly poison
The silence makes me feel uncomfortable, I need to break trough the darkness.
"Harry." I say, my voice strong.
It takes a few moments before he comes back to life again.
"Yeah?" he says, uninterested and slightly irritated, like I just disturbed a happy dream or something, wich of course is not true. He doesn't have happy dreams anymore. Only nightmares. Every single night... and day.
Silence. And then...
"I know." I say simply.
Fear not the flame of my love's candle
Let it be the sun in your world of darkness
Give unto me all that frightens you
I'll have your nightmares for you
If you sleep soundly
He looks taken aback and a bit confused. Of course he does, I answer myself. He doesn't know what I'm talking about, does he?
It doesn't matter.
I just smile reassuringly.
Fear not the flame of my love's candle
Let it be the sun in your world of darkness
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Well? What did you think? I'm actually very proud of it. It's one of my best works :). Please, R&R. No flames, try to be gentle. Tell me if something was wrong or something, I want to know, but don't flame. Try to be as nice as possible. Thank you.
DISCLAIMER
The song 'Give Unto Me' is from the wonderful band 'Evanescence', and the characters are from the always amazing J.K. Rowling.
---- 05-01-05
Ok. As some people may notice, I have edited it a bit. Thanx to 'CrypticIllusion' I have been able to to fix some grammar and stuff. But I think I can get out of these grammar mistakes with the simple exuse: 'Not only English isn't my native language, but I'm also just another fifteen years old girl from Holland.' So it is a real challenge for me to write fanfiction in English. And I must say, I think that I'm really doing well for my age. Of course not every tiny grammar detail is going to be perfect, hell, I'm still in the learning process aren't I? And so what if I make a couple of mistakes, I'm still the best English student at my school :D.
I changed the ending, too. I just thought it was a bit 'out of character' or must I say 'out of Jo's writing' for Ginny to say those words. It looked very unreal to me. The current ending fits better I think. Lemme know your thoughts.
I'M VERY HAPPY WITH THE CURRENT REVIEWS I'VE GOT, IN PARTICULAIR WITH CrypticIllusion's :D. PLEASE, IF ANYBODY SEES MORE GRAMMAR MISTAKES, SEND ME AN E-MAIL OR SOMETHING. I'D REALLY APPRICIATE IT. THAT WAY I CAN LEARN MUCH EASIER, THANX.