CHAPTER #12

Parting Ways

Sirius skidded to a halt directly in front of the ominous pair of gargoyles that haunted the entrance to Dumbledore's office. Before he could even think of troubling himself again with a password that he had no chance of guessing, Sirius found himself standing nose to nose with the Headmaster, who had just opened the door and was leading a small girl out before him.

"Fay!" breathed Sirius without thinking.

She responded with an entirely forlorn look, and kept her silence.

Dumbledore looked between the two of them, and seemed to decide something.

"I think it would do well for you to come in here, Sirius, and for you to remain where you are, Fay. Your friend needs to understand something." Spoke the professor gravely.

He proceeded to lead both Sirius and Fay back up to the confines of his office, where he offered them both great puffy chairs, just like the last time when they had both been there. When neither youth spoke, Dumbledore folded his long fingers, and addressed them both.

"I had hoped that it would not come to this."

Sirius and Fay exchanged looks, for this was a somber beginning of a conversation.

If the headmaster noticed their gesture, he paid it no heed, however. On the contrary, he resumed speech with a twinkle in his eye.

"That is to say, I had somewhat hoped that it would be easier to transport Fay this year without anyone taking too much notice. But it appears she has made a friend." He paused and smiled warmly down at the two of them. "This complicates things a bit."

"What do you mean?" asked Sirius uneasily. "Fay isn't going anywhere. Are you, Fay?"

He turned to her, sure that she would be just as confused, just as nonplussed as he himself was. But she did not look that way at all. She looked frightened and mournful, and didn't quite meet his inquiring gaze. After a moment, she said croakily:

"I have to leave, Sirius."

"No, you don't! Where've you got to go?"

"If I may be so rude as to interrupt? I think I can explain to Sirius why it is you must leave." Dumbledore glanced at Fay for her approval. She consented. "You see, Sirius, Fay told me what you and young Remus had attempted to tell her a few fortnights ago, and informed me that the two of you knew that she was a changeling, and that you were both more than willing to help her to rescue her counterpart in the moorfolk realm. What you were not aware of, I'm afraid, is that Fay has known about her misfortune since she was very young. It took a very long time for me to be able to accept her here at Hogwarts, and almost as soon as she arrived, we found the location of the human girl now residing in her place in the faerie mound. Very regretfully, I learned that it would be in both her best interests as well as the young girl's, for Fay to leave school."

Sirius felt his jaw drop. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think. He wanted to close his eyes and forget all about Fay. Forget that he had ever met her. He wanted to forget the smell of her flyaway hair, her tiny little hands, the many different colours of her eyes, and the feeling of her skin. He wanted to wash out her voice, her manner, her very presence. He wanted to erase her memory. Because how could he live if Fay ever left?

I have to forget her. He told himself. I have to forget everything about her. Because he knew that the worst part about a nightmare was being able to remember it, and the worst part about a good dream was waking up and knowing it had never been real.

Sirius blinked and cleared his throat. He couldn't say anything, couldn't think. He couldn't concentrate. His brain was doing everything in its power to block Fay's being out, to cease to remember her, while his heart ripped in two. He thought he might die from the agony of it, and thought he very well could have, had Dumbledore not said something just then.

"I know it is hard, Sirius. But it has to be done. Fay must leave. I am sorry that I cannot offer either of you a more comforting word than that. But know this: young love, which I know is something that you both share, is boundless, and can survive anything. Repression and hardship only help it to grow stronger. Destiny, or Serendipity, as it is more appropriately called in this case, is a funny thing. The two of you will meet again somewhere, have no fear. You're both free to go."

Fay stared determinedly into Sirius's face, willing him to look at her, but he refused and swept past her coldly leading the way to the large door at the bottom of the winding staircase.

When they had left the comfort and quiet of Dumledore's office, Fay struggled to keep up with Sirius, who was making every effort to stay a good distance from her. From then on, he was resolved that he would not speak to Fay. She was no one, and he had never cared for her. Nor she for him, apparently. Otherwise she would never think of leaving. What was the point of a long, sticky goodbye, if he would never see her again anyway? Might as well end the heartache, and forget it all right now. Perhaps the pain would numb soon...

"Sirius! Sirius, will y'turn 'round and talk to me?"

No response.

"Sirius! Sirius Black!"

He was adamant.

"Sirius, please..."

Just keep walking. Numb the pain, numb the pain.

They had reached the grounds and found themselves surrounded by the contrary sunshine. Fay was still in Sirius's wake.

"Sirius, please wait! I want to talk to you! I wanted to tell you..." she hesitated for an evanescent moment, and then: "I love you."

He halted, and hated his heart for skipping a beat. For soaring painfully.

"Just... just before I left. I just wanted to tell you. Goodbye. I love you."

Sirius did not turn around.

He stood in the sickeningly cheerful sun for a few fateful moments, deciding much too late that he loved Fay, too. Dearly. Fifteen years old or not, as Dumbledore had said, love was boundless. A chilly breeze drifted past him and somewhere in the distance, a mocking bird sang.

It was mocking him. It knew his misery and it taunted him. He hated that bird. He hated it, and the tree were it resided, and the endless, horribly beautiful blue winter sky that engulfed him. In utter loss and despair, Sirius turned his tragic, brooding frame back to the Gryffindor common room, vaguely cognizant that the people there who were up there now would no doubt less than lighten his despondent state.

Sirius then wished that he had a James back. James would have talked with him, understood. If they were still friends. Sirius had no one left in the world, and his depression only darkened as he approached the portrait hole.

"Tai Chi," he said in a listless, indifferent tone, and the picture swung forward to admit him.

The common room was empty, save for a small cluster of people sitting in his favourite place by the eastern window. Not even fully aware of where his feet were taking him, Sirius stalked over to that same cluster, planning to ignore the people that already occupied it. He had his rights, anyway. He wanted to sit there, and he was going to.

Plopping himself down in the largest chair opposite the window and continuing to bask in his despair, Sirius didn't even notice that the group of people (whose faces were all out of focus, Sirius's present state was so surreal) was not merely a group of people. It was his fellow (though now at the present, somewhat divided) Marauders. He tired to speak, but after the first effort failed, Remus said:

"Hello Padfoot."

Sirius turned. His rejoinder was a grunt.

"Are you alright?"

"Not really."

There ensued an awkward pause in which Remus and James exchanged worried expressions, Peter looked confused, and Sirius feigned disinterest in the whole affair. Truthfully, though, he only wished that this accidental stumble upon his old friends might give him someone to talk to. Someone to help numb the pain...

This time, however, it was James who broke the silence.

"Sirius, look, I know I've been a bit of an ass lately, and... I'm sorry. Lily told me about how she and Fay are friends now, anyway."

Sirius felt a small pang of relief at this statement, but a combination of the mention of Fay's name, along with his own mounting self-pity, was enough for him to disguise his brief euphoria.

"Good of you to come around," he said bitterly, still not looking at any of them.

Sirius could feel the tension that filled the air he shared with his three former friends, and then had an epiphany. If it was Fay who kept Sirius going when he no longer had James, perhaps it would be James who could keep him going when he no longer had Fay. He was being a prat!

"But still, never mind, eh? Let's just let bygones be bygones, and all that." He forced a smile.

James cracked a toothy grin. "Thanks mate," he said earnestly. "Anyway, it's been rather difficult without you around. I've been having to spend most of my time with pudgy, here." He gestured to Peter.

"Hey!"

All four of them, Moony, Wormtail (yes, even so), Padfoot and Prongs, shared a short and blissful laugh. They were friends again. And Sirius was glad of it. Ignoring the empty hole in his soul that nagged him at any sign of happiness, he tried to keep his mind off of Fay.

"We've been up to quite a lot during your, er, duration of distraction, shall we say, and even though Moony's had to go through his transformations without us," Sirius winced with gilt, but Remus only smiled good naturedly. "We've gotten quite a bit of work done on our map."

"It's finished, actually," said Peter.

"I was just about to show him that, dolt. You always ruin things. Anyway, I believe you still have the key, Remus? Peter has the box, so if you two will do the honors..."

Sure enough, after a bit of searching his robes, Remus located the key and inserted it into the small mahogany box that Peter held between his thick fingers, and all four of them heard the satiating click as it opened.

Gingerly, James, extracted the long piece of parchment from its resting place, set it on the table, and said, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good" before tapping it lightly with his wand.

A heading appeared on the map, introducing Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs, who were proud to present The Marauder's Map. Below the heading, an absolutely flawless and intricate layout of the entire castle and its grounds and inhabitants swirled before him. It was truly amazing. As his hungrily mischievous gray eyes roved the remarkable map, the halted very suddenly at a small dot labeled Fay that was apparently standing right behind him. Puzzled, he turned around.

There she was, more wrenchingly beautiful then he had ever seen her, a sorrowful expression emanating from her now dark brown eyes.

"Hello," she said softly.

"Hello," he responded, dumbstruck and lost for words.

"Will you come to our room with me? One last time?"

The brown eyes were irresistible. "Okay," Sirius said after a time.

His friends gave him puzzled (though no longer angry) looks as he got up and followed her out of the room and down to their secret room.

The familiar vines and plants crept over the door, and it was Fay who let go of his hand, and turned the wooden knob. The air in the room, which had again resumed its moor guise, was now cloaked in dusk and silence. Sirius sighed and turned to face Fay.

"Do you really have to go?"

Fay broke down. She buried her face in Sirius's chest and he could feel it moisten as she cried softly. "Yes," she said. "But I don't want to. I'll miss you so much, Sirius. I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. I don't want to go." She sobbed.

He rested his chin on her head and stroked her back as she cried. He didn't say anything, because he knew if he did then awful lump in his throat would cause him to cry, as well. He couldn't remember the last time he had ever cried.

After a while, Fay lifted her gorgeous head and sniffed. He wiped away her tears and stroked her the subtle frame of her face.

"I love you, too."

It is impossible to convey how difficult it was for the two young lovers to part. They held on to each other for almost the whole night, trying desperately to counter the cruel fate that had brought them together, then pulled them apart.

A/N- a bit tragic, I know, but keep more hopes up, there's more to come. I liked writing it and I hope you liked reading it! Thanks to insane elf girl and Snuffles for your support. Love you guys!

-St mary:)

P.S.- there may be some weird format stuff, because this program is pretty restrictive, and I wanted to do some cool things with this chapter, but just ignore that jazz and stick to the content, lol. ;)