Chapter 32: A Plain Morning
The following morning...
"And where have YOU been, CC?" Megan inquired Caitlin as Caitlin walked into the bathroom in full uniform.
Caitlin glanced down at the floor and mumbled, "Well, uh, I sorta was busy..."
"...Where was Mike, too?" Natsu asked.
"Uh, don't ask me," Caitlin murmured as a sweatdrop formed on the back of her head. "Well, we DID have to talk... Boss knows everything."
"...YOU'RE KIDDING!" Natsu shouted.
"No..."
"...He told everyone else, didn't he?"
"...Most everyone was there. He was screaming at me."
"...Oh...crap..."
"This is bad...," Megan whispered.
"Yeah, so I had to talk to Mike about it. He's going to call him tonight," Caitlin remarked.
Megan nodded. "Let's go down to breakfast."
"Akay," Caitlin and Natsu responded in harmony.
Once downstairs and in the dining room, the three ham girls sat down at the table with Mike, Roger, and Becky. Mike was leaned back in his chair as he said, "Good morning, ham gals! Can you just not wait until today and tomorrow are over?"
"I guess," Caitlin mumbled. "Why? Are you going to kill Chad, too?"
"...YAY!" Natsu shouted. "That'd be fun! I mean he did the victory speech and all... And he's annoying."
Mike nodded. "Sure, I'll kill him, too. Who wants me to blast his head off or blast a big hole in him or both?"
"Both!" Megan shouted.
"YAY!" Natsu said.
"Done," Mike replied as he winked.
After a few minutes, the maids brought out plates of pancakes and bowls of Cheerios. One maid set a plate of pancakes and a bowl of Cheerios in front of Caitlin. Caitlin looked at the Cheerios and said, "Well, I thought Stella didn't like Cheerios."
"I LOVE Cheerios," Becky said as she started on the Cheerios.
Mike sighed. "She doesn't. But I do. She only ate them for me... Sigh..."
Natsu nudged Caitlin in the ribs and whispered, "Don't make him talk about Stella for an hour. He did that yesterday."
"Haha," Caitlin responded.
"Besides," Megan cut in as she poked Caitlin in her ribs on the other side of her, "what did you do last night with Mike, hmm? Did you...???"
"...OH GOD, NO! Not at all, even though he kept on kissing my neck," Caitlin answered. "I've not even done that with Boss, and I don't plan on it soon... Y'all, do y'all think I'm some, like, pervert?"
Natsu and Megan nodded in unison.
"God...," Caitlin muttered as she shook her head. "We talked about the Ham-Hams. He's gonna call Boss tonight. Haha, Mike knows his cellphone number now since I told him." Caitlin winked. "I think he DOES like me and he wants to help me out with Boss, but I think he likes me TOO much and wants Boss and me to divorce so I can be his 'second wife'."
"Ah," Megan and Natsu said in harmony.
With Stella...
Stella opened her silver eyes slowly. She was in the room again, and the voiceless hamster was sleeping on the edge of the bed. Stella sat up and whispered, "Jamie, wake up..."
The nameless hamster opened his eyes and yawned loudly. He rolled off of the bed and into the floor. He stood up and peered up at Stella. The voiceless hamster mouthed something.
"Good morning to you, too, Jamie," Stella responded as she stepped off of the bed. "Are you wanting breakfast?"
The voiceless hamster nodded as he lightly grabbed Stella's paw. The two walked out of the room and into the kitchen. The nameless hamster grabbed a box of Cheerios and ran into the dining room with three bowls and three spoons. Stella sighed as she thought, Good God. MORE Cheerios. Mike likes Cheerios...
Stella followed the voiceless hamster into the dining room. The hamster went out of the room to get Jake. When he came back with Jake, Jake was barely awake. He sat down at the table and mumbled, "Cheerios again??? NOOO..."
The voiceless hamster held up a spoon while mouthing something. Jake ducked down and shouted, "THAT'S YOUR SPOON!"
The nameless hamster shrugged, grabbed a handful of Cheerios, and threw it at Jake. Jake hissed and muttered, "You're cleaning that up!"
The voiceless hamster rolled his eyes as he poured the Cheerios and gave everyone a bowl. Once again, he had three bowls before Stella or Jake got half way done with theirs. Stella was also thankful again she hadn't blown up yet. She didn't say anything to the nameless hamster or Jake whom was now complaining about the Cheerios. Stella paused as she thought and looked up at Jake.
"Jake, I have a question." Her voice was crisp and clear.
Jake looked over at Stella. "Yes, Stella?"
Stella inquired, "You know when you get married, you need a marriage license. You don't have one." She revealed a look of superiority.
Jake returned the look and retorted, "Well, Miss Stella, your father and I did get that when we first agreed on the marriage."
"He signed FOR me? When?"
"Well, uh, after we talked about it. Yes, he signed for you. You were too young to sign."
"...Shit on a stick..." Stella sighed loudly and muttered, "Why am I stuck with you? You're just a big bag of-"
"Are you aware that you can't put shit on a stick?"
"Yes, you can."
"How?"
"...Pick it up and jam it on a stick."
Jake shrugged. "It could work."
"Why are you so...so...CALM today?"
"Because. There's nothing in the world that can break me today."
"...What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"...Don't ask questions and I won't tell lies."
"Screw you, too." Stella got up from the table and walked over to the nameless hamster. "C'mon, Jamie, let's go." She felt a sweatdrop roll down the back of her head as "Jamie" yawned and fell asleep. "...Shucks..."
Jake stood up and walked over to Stella. "Stella, you forgot, didn't you?"
"I forgot what?" Stella glanced around uneasily.
"You forgot about that one day we spent together."
"I forgot about that one day I was forced to spend with you." Stella rolled her eyes.
"...Dammit, don't ruin my moment! Why don't we just go into the living room and spend time-"
"Quality bonding time with a psycho. Grand."
"Please, Stells."
"PLEASE DO NOT CALL ME BY MY NICKNAME, NO, THANK YOU."
"...Okay. Please, Stella, I'm BEGGING you. Just one day? You know, you're gonna spend the rest of your life with me, so we might as well get started now."
"Does that mean I'm gonna commit suicide in the next day because I've been around you? Fun fun fun. I'm so excited. I so cannot wait."
"Fun, we'll commit suicide together. How do you plan to die?"
"...I'm not serious, genius."
"I am."
"Go ahead and kill yourself now...let's get it over with so I can get the hell out of here."
"...No."
Stella sighed. "Okay, what do you want?"
"I want to spend a day with you. We'll do stuff, like play board games and-"
"I kill you? Wow, I knew it!"
"...No, we'll play board games and-"
"Spend the rest of the day wallowing in lameness. Yes, for the rest of my life, I will be looked upon as a lame-o. You already are, so you won't know the difference."
"...Stella, you're a smartass."
"Nah?"
"Okay, are we gonna go ahead and start our day?"
"Sure, let's get the lameness over with." Stella rolled her eyes as she walked out of the dining room and into the living room. Jake walked behind her. Stella lied back on the couch and watched as Jake opened a large closet and fished things out of it. He came up with a lot of board games and et cetera. He set them up and whispered to Stella, "Okay, Stella. You ready to play?"
"Whatever, as long as I get through wallowing in this lameness of yours." Stella got off of the couch and lied on the ground in front of whatever board game Jake put in front of her. She didn't even know what she was doing. It was just getting her through the game. She didn't know what was going on either.
"Dammit, you won," Jake muttered.
"Dammit, I did? Dude, I didn't even, like, know what I was doing," Stella murmured.