Disclaimer-No own, no sue!

A/N-For this chapter, I give thanks to SilverPhoenix25, Chibi Kat, UnderneathTheBridge, and Evadne for inspiration

The Midnight CGI

All of Gryffindor and Slytherin 1st-years, which comprises of about 15 people, stood outside waiting for their flying lessons.

"Hi! I'm Madame Marla Hooch," their flying instructor said. "And, yes, I did drop my hair dryer in the toilet this morning. Now the first thing you have to do is think happy thoughts!"

Everyone thought happy thoughts. No one wants to know what they were, especially judging by the strange look on Draco's face.

"Now, put your hand over your brooms and say up!"

Ron's, Neville's, and Harry's broom shot up. Ron's and Neville's slid gracefully into their hands. They straddled them and took off into the air, doing loop-de-loops and barrel rolls with enviable ease.

No one was paying attention, however, because Harry's broom had clocked him in the head. Angrily, he grabbed the broom as it took off and he was dangling by it with one hand. The broom ran into Ron and Neville and they fell to the ground, breaking several bones in the process. Everyone pointed and laughed. Oh, the pain of being comic relief.

"Oh look, a birdie," Harry said. He reached out and grabbed a birdie. Then he let go of his broom and fell to the ground, but he landed gracefully because the birdie flapped its wings and acted like a parachute.

Everyone screamed with delight and it was decided that Harry would be Seeker for the Quidditch team. Ron and Neville wept the bitter tears of being secondary characters.

Ron and Harry were eating a delicious meal when Draco came up to them.

"Potter."

"Malfoy."

"Potter."

"Malfoy."

"Potter!"

"Malfoy!

"POTTER!"

"MALFOY!"

"There are children present!" Ron shouted at them. "They don't need to hear that kind of language!"

They ignored him.

"Harry Potter." Malfoy took off his glove. "I challenge you to a duel." He glove-slapped him.

"Fine. Ron will be my second."

"What makes you think he'll listen to you?"

"Because I, unlike other Harry Potters, can speak with a British accent."

(Just keep telling yourself that, Blue-Eyes.)

Draco walked away.

Harry and Ron were walking down the dark corridors at night, arms around each other, singing something from the Village People.

Wait…………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Suddenly, Hermione appeared.

"You can't do this! You're going to get everyone in trouble! I lost enough points for Gryffindor! Hey, it wasn't my fault that my hair ate a second year! He should've read the Caution Sign! YOU CAN'T JUDGE ME!! ONE DAY WE SHALL ALL BE JUDGED!!!!!!!!!"

"Where'd you come from?" Harry asked. "And why aren't you talking in Too-Much-Sugar language?"

Hermione shrugged. "I took a sedative and suddenly I was here. Maybe it's because the label on my sedative was LSD. But I just figured that it belonged to Ludmilla Sally Diggleshire."

"Well, it's better to be here than floating around in the Yellow Submarine," Harry said.

"Guess so. Oh, and when we get back to the Common Room, expect a lot of cubic zirconium clouds."

"Okay."

"I hate you!" Ron yelled at Hermione.

"That's because it's an odd-numbered book," Hermione explained. "You'll be singing a different tune next year."

"………I HATE YOU!"

The both ignored him. Harry was shifting through his playing deck and making sure all the Exodia cards were on top. Trust in the heart of the cards? PLEEEEEEEEEEEEASE. They're inanimate, for Pete's sake!

Draco jumped into the hallway. "PREPARE TO DIE, POTTER!!!"

"Oh, well, guess Draco isn't here," Harry sighed. "Darn, I was really looking forward to using Mystical Elf. She's really hot for a Yu-Gi-Oh card. And, sadly, she's the best actor on the show."

Ron railed about the stupiditys of dubbing Anime that, unfortunately, no one listened to.

(Author grumbles and goes to watch Gundam Wing. Which, amazingly, is the only Dub better than the Sub. Canadian actors at least talk when the mouth is moving)

Suddenly, a mini Danny Devito popped up. He made some generic remarks until ex-Director Chris Columbus shot him and dragged him away.

"OOOH, that Chris Columbus," Draco said admiringly. "He can sail my Niña any day!"

(DA DUM, CHHHHHHH!)

Quite suddenly, Harry, Hermione, and Ron were in front of a big, three-headed dog.

"IT'S CEREBERUS!!!!!!!!!!!! WE'RE AT THE GATES OF HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Ron screamed.

"Isn't my CGI cool?" Chris Columbus said. "It did a lot better than the Santa Maria, I can tell you."

(DA DUM, CHHHHHHH!)

Hermione took out a magnifying glass and inspected the floor.

"Wow, isn't this menacing?" Harry said placidly.

"I'M MENACING!!" Cereberus said.

"See? I was speaking the truth! But…what is truth? PEACE AND LOVE, dudes! I don't want to be the hero of a book serial anymore! I want to open a Vegan restaurant that only serves grasses and herbs…oh, those grasses and herbs…That reminds me, I have to go visit the Herbology green houses now…" Harry had seen Hermione's "sedative" in her back pocket and decided to use some himself. Suddenly, the world seemed so much…happier!

Harry, Hermione, and Ron walked away.

"Hey, did you guys see that Cereberus was standing on a trap door?" Hermione said.

"I HATE YOU!" screamed Ron.

"Wow, Hermione, that might be an important plot device, but doesn't it stand to reason that a trap door would lead to the second floor?"

"You would think so, wouldn't you?"

"I HATE YOU!"

"Good night, all. We're not due to become friends for another chapter." Hermione walked away.

"Well, now that she's gone," Ron said. "That's when someone walked up to me and said/Young Man, get yourself off the street…"

They linked arms and skipped off to their Common Room, singing, "IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYMCA!"

Wow…this wasn't that funny, was it?