Chapter Nine found Sesshomaru and Kagome in a very compromising situation, compounded by their differing feelings for each other. Or are they so very different? Kikyou agreed to join the group under the guise of healing Inuyasha from his demonic afflictions.
For the record (ahem): I do not own, in whole or in part, any part of the Inuyasha franchise. Nor do I own any of the characters from said franchise that is used forthwith. The following story is solely based on the ramblings of a college student at a boring job and is not to be taken or believed as part of the true Inuyasha saga. That being said, please enjoy my first attempt at fan fiction. Feel free to critique ad nauseum. (Whew!)
Chapter Ten – Glory in Darkness
Rin roused herself from the morning's meditation to notice that Kagome was nowhere in sight. She started to get up, but fell over because her legs had gone numb. "Oh!" She almost started to cry, until she heard a little toady giggle coming from her right. She looked over and saw Jaken, who just straightened and re-aimed his staff of two heads at her. When he did this, he noticed that his feet had gone numb from the crooked posture he had taken getting ready for Rin's attack. He fell flat on his face, his staff springing out of his hands and upending in the little herb garden that she had started yesterday. Rin burst out laughing, feeling better about her numb limbs.
She got up, finally, and stomped up and down until tingly feeling returned to her toes. She walked over and opened Kagome's door, figuring that she hadn't finished getting ready, yet. She walked in, finding the room empty. Her night gown on a heap by the tatami, and her shoes gone. Where did she go? I didn't see her. Rin turned to Jaken and said very softly "Where is Kagome-sama?"
Before he replied he hobbled on his still numb feet over to the little garden and plucked his staff out, shaking off the herbs that were uprooted with it. "Hey! Be careful. Kagome-sama has not even seen that yet."
Jaken snorted. "Nor will she, if she went where I think she went. While you were over there sleeping, I watched Kagome head towards the Master's private wing. You know as well as I that no one goes in there and lives to tell about it." He finished that last line on a laugh, then coughed as he laughed too hard.
Her eyes went wide. "I was not sleeping." Then she digested the rest of what he said. She gasped as she turned and ran at breakneck speed, for a little girl, towards Sesshomaru-sama's wing.
When she was about halfway there, it became increasingly hard to see, because tears were flying off of her face. She turned a corner, and ran straight into Kagome, who was returning to her quarters. Rin didn't notice it, but Kagome also had tears flying from her face. Both mikos fell backwards and landed flat on their butts. "Oh!" came from both directions.
Kagome was the one who got up first. Just my luck. All that happened before, and now I have a bruised butt. And now Rin will know and not stop with her endless questions. She wiped her tears from her face and ran a hand through her hair. Knots everywhere. She pulled her hair behind her head and tucked it into her kimono, hoping that Rin at least not notice that. Rin was on the floor now, crying like a baby and rubbing her little butt. It had all been too much for her. She had fallen asleep during meditation and thought Kagome was going to die. And now I look like an idiot, knocking Kagome-sama over, and she will kill me...
Kagome didn't know how to quiet the little girl, now that her own temper was at its zenith and she felt horribly alone. Who am I to console a little girl? I only have a brother and grown up friends. She picked up Rin and cushioned Rin's head on her shoulder. Kagome was still crying as they made it back to their hallway.
Jaken stopped mid stride when he saw the pair, and was at a loss as to what to do. Kagome just stared darkly at him until he finally cowed and shuffled quickly to the side. She looked just like Lord Sesshomaru then. And if my nose does not deceive me... He decided wisely not to finish that thought, but went about his business. There were vassals clamoring to the main gates that Jaken was actually able to boss around. Better than staying here in this den of iniquity.
Once Rin had finally stopped her hysterics, she noticed that she was laying on Kagome's tatami. Kagome was at the dresser, brushing knots and leaf bits from her hair. Rin rubbed her eyes and sat up, the rustling of the comforter turning Kagome's head. "Feel better?" Rin nodded sheepishly. "Good. I know I always feel better after a good cry."
She sat down on the tatami beside Rin, who was still cowering, waiting for her punishment. "Rin, what's the matter? Why are you scared of me?"
Rin sniffed very loudly before answering. "You're going to punish me, right?"
"What for?"
She took a deep, shuddering breath. "I fell asleep when I was meditating, and my legs fell asleep. I laughed at Jaken and he fell over into the herb garden I was going to surprise you with this morning. And I made you fall down and hurt your butts." She gasped and clamped her hand over her mouth as she realized she just added cussing to her list of faults.
Kagome stared amazement at the little girl. "What on earth would make you think I would punish you for that?"
"Jaken gets punished all the time for smaller offenses by Sesshomaru-sama. And he punished you twice already for cussing at him. I didn't mean to make you hurt, Kagome-sama, I promise."
"Calm down, Rin. No one is going to hurt you." She put her hand on the girl's head, trying to forestall the tears she could see behind her big eyes. "I am not Sesshomaru-sama. And what happened to you today, has happened to me several times. When Kaede was teaching me to meditate, she said when I could calm myself enough to fall asleep, that I was doing a very good job. Now, I wouldn't punish you for doing a good job, would I?" Rin shook her head. "Especially when I wasn't even there." Damn, I wish I hadn't reminded her of that.
"Where were you?"
Sigh. "I had some things to... discuss with Sesshomaru."
Rin jumped off the tatami and landed in Kagome's lap, hugging her so tight it was affecting her breathing. "Jaken told me that no one goes into his wing without dying. I thought you were dead. I was going to save you, but started crying because I didn't know how." Kagome's heart dropped from her throat to the bottom of her feet. Rin was running to save me? If she only knew that I was here just to save her...
"Let's go and see if we can repair the herb garden." Kagome picked up the little girl and set her on the floor. Leaning in close she added a conspiratorial remark to cheer Rin up. "And then I will let you play with Jaken again. I think he deserves a little something for making you worry like that." Rin instantly cheered up and ran out into the courtyard to fix up the little garden.
Miroku and Sango were sitting on a large rock, leaning on each other in mutual weariness. He was even too tired to take advantage of their current situation. Shippo was asleep beside Kirara, who was snoring softly. Miroku moved his eyes to where Inuyasha sat cross legged in front of the fire. He squinted and noticed that Inuyasha was asleep as well. Yes, he is calm, but we are only a good two days away from Lord Sesshomaru's castle. And he will need a lot of rest before we get there if he is to stand a chance against his brother.
His eyes then roamed all over the area, but saw no sign of Kikyou. Probably inhaling more lost souls. That chills me to the bone.
He started to sit up, but that made Sango fall against him, and he didn't want to wake her up. For a moment, he sat still, Sango's head leaning on his upper arm. Slowly, he shifted his arm and let her head fall slowly into his lap. How many times have I dreamed of this very situation? And now, I am too tired even to think about doing anything about it. With a great sigh, he lifted her head out of his lap and placed it back down onto a makeshift pillow. She let out a little moan and shifted a little to get more comfortable. He stood there, looking down at her for a moment, and then left in search of Kikyou.
It didn't take long to find her. The eerie white lights of the lost souls directed him near a lake. He didn't want to get too close, just enough to make sure she wasn't stabbing them in the back. He could, however, hear her talking to herself, although very quietly. "Come to me, my Kagome. I can hear my soul calling to me, and I will find it. Then we both will know peace." He quickly went back to the camp, afraid that what he had heard did not bode well for the troupe. Our only hope is that we get to Kagome before she does.
A shadow on the other side of the river also retreated from Kikyou's soliloquy. The shadow turned into a black mist that moved at the speed of the nighttime winds to report to his master what he saw.
Sesshomaru finally returned to his castle, after a personal banishment to clear his head. The first thing to greet him was not Rin, jumping up and down with a little bouquet of pink flowers for him. And it was not Kagome, ready to fight again. Instead, it was Jaken, hopping from one foot to the next, screeching his name at the top of his lungs.
"My Lord, my Lord! I have such news about your brother, that hanyou Inuyasha." Sesshomaru stopped in his tracks long enough to make Jaken run for cover behind a chair. Sesshomaru let out a huff of disdain and kept on walking. My Lord is back to normal. That filthy miko meant nothing to him!
Is there no where I can go where I don't have to hear about Inuyasha? "Tell me, Jaken, what has the idiot done now?"
Jaken resumed his position at the foot of his master. "Inuyasha was transformed when you stole his miko. He became a full blooded demon shell, and started rampaging across the Western Lands looking for you. I have gotten reports that he has killed at least a dozen demons. Probably more by now. And his group of misfits is coming this way. They should be here within the next day."
This is not what I needed to hear. My problems with the miko will only get worse once she knows that her precious Inuyasha is near. "Jaken. Tell no one of this. And make sure Kagome does not hear that he is nearby. I have enough problems with her as it is."
"My Lord, there is no reason for you to worry about that miko. Surely you can handle a lowly creature such as her. In fact if you ever need me to dispose of her, I would be more than happy...to..." He wisely shut his mouth as his master's foot was itching to kick the little green toad.
"I will not hear you say another word against the miko, Jaken. She has proven herself a good master for Rin, and will be staying here for a while to come." He bent down and looked the little toad almost in the eye. "I suggest you get used to it." He was gone before the little demon could grovel his foot out of his mouth.
He left the little vassal and stalked towards the wing where the mikos lived. I will not let her run my life. She is a visitor here, and I am the Lord and master. She will not run my life. He turned the corner, where he saw the two girls tending to a little garden in front of Kagome's room. His breath caught in his throat as he realized how much the two looked alike. Rin almost looked like Kagome's daughter. And she is not leaving, no matter how much Inuyasha blusters.
He's back. Kagome felt him watching her from not too far away, but she refused to look at him. He had been gone almost two days, not leaving her any word. He just finished with me and left me there. Not one word afterwards. Not one damn word! Kagome could feel the heat rising up her face, and stopped planting the worms wort before she hurt herself. She felt Rin tugging at her sleeves and noticed that she was crushing the little seedling between her fingers. She thrust the plant into Rin's hand and stood up. "I think that that is enough for today. We'll finish this later. Go and get cleaned up."
They both dusted their knees as they stood. Rin again mimicked Kagome and stretched her back before running back to her room. Kagome immediately turned around and walked to her room. She couldn't stop herself from looking at Sesshomaru as he just stood there, beside her room, looking back. But, she did manage to walk into her room and shut the door without saying anything. Hah! I did it. I did nothing that he has a right to get angry about. I didn't even make a face. Ha, hah! But, she didn't feel as confident as her mind was telling her to be. Because she couldn't breathe.
Sesshomaru stood beside her room, not sure of what to do. He could hear her breath speeding up and knew she was about to cry. Why is she crying? I have done nothing. He leaned a little closer to the wall, but then backed off. Why am I sneaking around here like I am a stranger here? This is my castle! He straightened up and walked into her room, transferring what was in his head into his mouth. "This is my castle, and I will not be treated like a misfit in it!"
"Eep!" Kagome dove down beside the dresser as she hastily tried to pull her dirty kimono back on. He blanched, forgetting what he was going to say to her and turned around. Ugh! She did it again. She is just a human miko, and she has me bending to her will without saying a word. He turned back around, and was a little surprised to see her standing not far from him, with her hands on her hips and legs akimbo.
"How dare you come in here? You have a lot of explaining to do." She didn't care if she angered him anymore. She was not going to stand for being treated like a possession he owned any longer.
"I have some explaining... this is MY house! I can do whatever I please. It is you who do needs to explain to me."
She looked up at him incredulously. "What do I possibly have to explain?"
Why you did not properly greet me when I came home...Why you are ignoring me... Why you were crying after we... "Why you are still treating me with disrespect. I thought I had disassociated you from that notion a few days ago."
"Oh, is that what you call it? We were disassociating me from my attitude." She nodded, apparently thinking about it. She then proceeded to walk up to him and started hitting his chest with her fists.
He put his arm out in front of him and she recoiled, thinking he was going to strike her back. When he stopped to, she really began hitting him in earnest. He grabbed one of her hands, but the other kept pounding his chest. "Kagome, stop this. You are not hurting me; you are only hurting yourself."
She stopped and looked into his eyes. He did not see what he expected to see in hers; not fear, not even hatred. It was disappointment, plain and simple. He then realized what he has said, and tried to amend it. "You are not listening to me..."
"Oh, so it is not just my fault that you left me, lying there. I am also so simple that I can't hear you warning me?" She kicked him where she knew she would do some damage, and Sesshomaru instantly doubled over in pain. She backed away from him, but she was far from finished. "I hate you! You never touch me again, you hear me? I loathe you." Kagome was nearly screaming at the top of her lungs. "I don't care what you do to me. Kill me, I don't care. But I will not be treated like an object by anyone anymore. Do you understand me?"
She paused for a second to catch her breath. Sesshomaru straightened up and just stood there, looking down at her with that haughty attitude that he always wore when people were nearby. Inside, however, he was completely confused. Is that what she is angry about? She thinks I just used her, like anyone would do?
Sesshomaru was so stunned by her outburst that he was intending to just stand there and take it. But what she said next hurt him more than any kick could ever hope to accomplish. "You are just like your brother. Do you hear me? He treated me like shit, too." She turned and started pacing across the floor, with only the tatami separating him from her wrath. Kagome did not see the anger flare in his eyes at the mention of his name. She also did not know that these two days he had been gone, one of the reasons he had been afraid come back was because she might be gone. Kagome knew that he would never hurt Rin. He never killed anyone unless they deserved it, and Rin couldn't even kill a ladybug. Sesshomaru had assumed Kagome would glean from their last meeting that he would not hurt her either. I care too much for either of them to hurt them. Damned if I know why, at this precise moment, but I do. He no longer questioned it; it was not his way to challenge something that had no way out. And apparently expecting her to do the same was futile at best.
But I am not like my brother. Inuyasha is a bastard who couldn't keep his woman and didn't want the one who drooled at his feet. He is a fop and a folly for anyone who tries to change him. Kagome was still ranting when he crossed directly over the tatami until she heard the bamboo creak. By that time, he was close enough to grab her arm, a little more harshly than he had intended. "Cease your prattling, miko."
"Oh, you don't like that, do you Sesshomaru? Well, I don't care, it is true. He used me, and you used me. But, at least he only used my powers to spot jewel shards. You toyed with my mind, dangling a little girl's life over my head. And you used me!"
He shook her. "I did not use you, woman. You gave as well as you got."
She laughed. A slightly shrill laugh that sent chills down his spine. "Well, I had an excellent teacher. Maybe, when I return to Inuyasha, he will be grateful to you after all. For all you taught me."
Again he shook her, until her sanity began to return. God, what was that outburst? I had sworn to myself that I wasn't going to say a word to him. Keh! Not one word, but about a hundred. Screamed at the top of my lungs. She looked into his eyes, and realized that she had passed going to far about five minutes ago. He looked angry enough to kill. Her. I guess the straw on his back was comparing him to Inuyasha. Well, too late Kagome. Hold your ground.
Despite her attempt to not be intimidated, the staring contest between them had her licking her suddenly dry lips and trying to stutter her way out of this. "I... didn't...I mean..."
"Oh, I think you did." He didn't let go of her, or even move. Just continued to stare down at her, his angry eyes changing from their usual gold to something much more molten. "And you are wrong."
"I am starting... to feel dizzy. I think... it would be best if.... if we parted ways for the rest of the day...until things cool down." She tried to walk back towards the dresser, but his grip on her arm jerked her back in his direction, slamming against his chest. Maybe not.
"You don't feel dizzy, and we both know it. Quit playing games with me, miko." His voice was a little husky, but Kagome couldn't tell if it was from the argument or something else. He still looked murderously angry with her.
"This...this..." Kagome's shoulders drooped in defeat. "This isn't going to work, Sesshomaru. One of us is going to kill the other. We are bound to. You hate humans. You have told both me and Inuyasha that they are good for nothing but slaughter. And I cannot live with someone who feels that way. Let me go home." The tears stinging the back of her eyes finally fell free.
"No." The grip on her arm tightened as she was speaking and now it was so intense that she whimpered in pain. He looked down and saw his white knuckles, immediately releasing her arm. But she did not move. Something was rooting her to the ground, even though she realized this may be her only chance to escape.
I just want to hear him say that he wants me to stay. He needs me to stay. I want to hear him say that he needs me; not my damn miko powers.
What a stubborn termagant she was. But, I wonder what is going on in her head. Is she thinking of him? Panting to return to him? Inuyasha? "You will not be leaving until I allow you to. You have not fulfilled your role here, so get any inclinations of teaching Inuyasha out of your head." He grabbed her by the nape of the neck so swiftly that she didn't even have time to breathe, and pulled her to his hungry mouth. He kissed her roughly, fighting to quell the sudden rush of anger that welled up in him when he thought of her doing this to his brother. It took all of his effort not to strangle her, his hand was so close to doing just that. But, he did not fail to notice that underneath his hand, her pulse was racing even faster than his.
He lifted his mouth from hers and purred the next few words into her ear softly. "Give up any hope of seeing Inuyasha anytime soon, miko. Let me warn you that I tend to keep you until you have outlived your usefulness... in training Rin and others that might come along. Until that day, you will have no other master but me. Do you understand that?"
She really began to cry at that, simpering, mewling sobs that she was completely unable to control. It has been too much of an emotional day for her. Inexplicably, he turned from cruelty to infinite caring, coaxing her to stop her crying with a variety of kisses on her lips and along her jaw line. Their teasing touches and gentle caresses combined with the similar caresses of his hand on her neck and down her back worked their magic on her, making her at least calm down and stop crying. His mouth hovered over hers so closely that Kagome could almost feel the brush of her lips.
I don't need this. Not now. I don't want to need this. But, she knew from past experience that he would soon render her helpless. And, even though he gave her every chance to stop it, she just stood there, letting him kiss her and hold her gently to him. She did nothing when he lowered both of them to the floor. Nothing to stop him when he put her arms around his shoulders and kissed her so deeply that her soul ached when his lips left hers. Nothing but hold him closer to her.
Her protests died quickly in her mind as he began to explore her body again. This time he teased and caressed everywhere with his lips and his tongue; an agonizingly slow voyage of discovery during which his wayward mouth would wander to suck and nibble at her most sensitive places until she was driven mindless with desire.
Kagome felt as if she were rudderless, twisting and shifting under him, no notion of conscience or inhibitions. She responded to him freely and fiercely. She let him put his mouth wherever he wanted, to do whatever he wanted. Even when she felt the movements of his tongue inside her and the smoothness of his cheeks against the most sensitive point of all. She raked her hands through his hair, holding him there while her body convulsed in spasms that didn't seem to stop.
Not even when he moved his body upward over hers and guided himself into her, and he moved to whisper soft mumbled words in her ear, most of which she couldn't later remember, did she protest. Not when he began to pick up speed and grated harder against her did she tell him again to leave her alone. Not when he buried his face in the soft tangle of hair at her neck. Not when he growled out her name, and felt the shudder of his body as he enlarged and throbbed inside her did she stage another protest against his treatment of her.
She was so exhausted after that that she barely noticed that he had again left her body. But, this time he had covered them both up with the pink and gold comforter, returning to lay by her side. He smoothed the sweat-damp hair off of her face as she began to fall asleep. The last thing she remembered before unconsciousness was him kissing her goodnight.
Unfortunately for both of them, she remembered everything she had wanted to say when she woke up the next morning. She hadn't the energy to fight him anymore, so she quietly got up and dressed. She didn't even try to comb her tangled mass of hair again. There is no way I can get a brush through this until it is washed. Kagome tried to remain calm as she finished tying the sash of her kimono. Then she went over to the other side of the tatami to retrieve her shoes.
Sesshomaru had been awake the instant he had felt her heat leave his side. He wanted to say something, but he decided to enjoy the pleasant feeling of this intimate moment, watching her get dressed. He even suppressed a major smile as he saw her consternation with her hair. He decided that she was getting ready for a bath until he saw her collecting nothing.
Kagome sensed that he was awake. She didn't know how she knew, she just did. She was tired of examining every little thought that ran through her head. There were just too many of them. And look where it had gotten her so far. Nowhere.
She turned to him, stunned for a moment at the sight of seeing him lying on her tatami, knowing he was completely naked, but seeing only what the comforter at his waist would allow her to see. Her heart constricted, because she knew she would not be able to take any more of this. She looked him straight in the eyes and said "I am going home. Not to Inuyasha. I am returning to the well. Now." And she left through the door without even bothering to close it. Or say goodbye to Rin. Or him. And he was, to put it simply, too stunned to do a damn thing about it.
Coming soon – Chapter Eleven – Familial Ties
Sesshomaru traps Kagome through her motherly feelings for Rin. Kikyou continues to travel with the troupe, even though Miroku doubts her pledged intentions. They finally come across Sesshomaru at a mountain pass. The brothers vent their frustrations there.