Sometimes
By Cherished Dreams
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
Sometimes I fear that I'll wake up and all of this isn't true. That it's all a great and wonderful dream that a part of my imagination has made up. But then on one of our meetings, he comes up to me and kisses my cheek and embraces me tight, telling me that he loves me so much. And I know I'm not dreaming. But I can't help but think that this is too good to be true.
Sometimes I see him with other girls, the ones that show off their chests and have their faces covered in make up, and I fear that, he'll forget about me and do that thing he used to do to his other 'conquests' and leave me out in the rain, with a broken heart, because they'll give him what he wants and what I can't.
I keep thinking about the way we came to be together, to be what we are now and what we have, and when I replay all our moments together, good and bad, tears and laughter, it seems so fairytale cliché-ish. And then I wonder if I'm dreaming again.
But when he's with them and I'm around, he always catches my eyes and shoots an apologetic look from them so quickly, that I'm the only one that sees it and figure out the meaning behind it. Then I remember that I shouldn't worry about him taking off with another girl. Because he said he wouldn't. And sometimes I worry, but I trust him, and my worry fades away.
Sometimes I fear he'll wake up from our dream world one day and see that he's so much better than me and leave what we have now, because I'm not worth everything that might happen to us. And dammit, I think so too. Because I think about his father and his 'community', and I think about how dangerous being in this relationship may be for him, and me. I cry in my dorm room, at night and fall asleep with tear encrusted cheeks.
But then we have this thing between us, like ESP and we know when each other is hurt or what, and I find myself waking up in the middle of the night from his soft caress, the one that only I know that he possesses. He wakes me up and we fly out of the window on his broom and he reassures me that everything will not go wrong. We spend time talking and when we really should get some rest, he flies me back to my dorm. He leaves me with a smile and a kiss of my forehead, because that's just the way he is and always leaves me with. He leave me with a sense of hope that one day, we'll be together without having to hide.
Sometimes I fear that, that fairytale ending kind of thing that I want will never come true. In fact, all I really want is to be with him without having to run from anything. So let's just cut out the part out of wanting a fairytale ending kind of thing. I fear it so much that sometimes I push him away and tell him that we shouldn't be doing this and that it'll never work out. I push him away and he gives me my space, because he knows what I'm like when I'm angry.
Then about after a whole week of missing his butterfly touches and breath-taking kisses, I owl him to meet me. We meet in the dark, and I tell him how I'm sorry and how I worry too much. He always chuckles and holds me tight as he tells me, that he knows how I worry too much, and that he loves that part of me as much as every other part of me. Then he reassures me that we'll be together as long as our love will last.
Sometimes.. I just think of him and remember why I fell in love with him, and that he fell in love with me, and sometimes I sit back and relax, content because he tell me not to worry, and I don't.
Because I've got him.
And sometimes I remind myself that he's got me too and I smile.
A/N: eekerz..!! that was err.. weird to say the least.. :D just a little look about how I feel sometimes.. ;D hehe.. gah..:S too corny.. I'm outta here..!! please review..!!