Thank you for all your ace reviews! I especially like that very random long
one!
Sorry it's taken me so long to update, 1st my computer went down, then my
stupid history teacher gave me loads of boring homework on the
uninteresting Mussolini!
"The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before." Good Will Hunting
The next morning I awoke to bright sunshine pouring in through the windows straight into my eyes. I was glad of the good weather though, it seemed to me that the sun had come out just for Selphie, to remind us of what she was like; happy, bubbly, and lovely.
I walked into my bathroom and instead of jumpimg quickly into the shower as I had always done, I simply sat on the edge of the bathtub, distracted by my thoughts. I had a quick shower and rushed to get changed into my formal SeeD uniform. Selphie, one of my dearest friends, would be put in the earth today. Memories of her ran through my mind and my tears dropped into the bath tub. When I was younger I had put friendship to the back of my mind as I pursued my training to become a SeeD, as an adult I hadn't allowed myself to become close to anyone for fear of being hurt or betrayed. But Selphie had broken down my stubborn walls by always being there for me and now I felt almost alone again. When I thought of those remaining in my life the image of Seifers face immediately entered my mind and I couldn't help but smile through my tears at the memory of his kindness.
I pulled myself together and dragged my weary body into the shower, I emerged soothed and quickly dressed in my formal SeeD uniform. I had a few hours until the funeral started so I wondered around a very quiet Garden and eventually ended up at the quad, where preparations for another garden festival were half finished but abandoned now with the loss of the head of the committee. I made my way though the banners and paper stremers, by the looks of things the theme this time was a masquerade ball, where everyone's face was covered by the masks they had made themselves. I was sure that the festival wouldn't go ahead without Selphie. It was a shame; everyone's efforts would go to waste.
I remembered what Zell told me last night about Irvine, about how badly he had taken it. I knew that I had to speak with him. He had truly loved Selphie, more than anyone had thought possible from the womanizer. But you could see the love in the eyes every time he looked at her and whenever her name was mentioned his lips would form a faint smile as if he was more proud of her than anything else in the world. I left the quad, which should have been full of joy, but was now a shrine to Selphie, a place of mourning and crepe paper.
He answered the door almost as soon as I had knocked on it. Irvine's eyes were red with black hollows under them. He was skinnier and his cheeks were gaunt. I had no words. Instead I took him in my arms and he cried on my shoulder for what seemed like an eternity.
"Oh, Irvine" I wept with him. "I don't know what to say. I want to say sorry, but I expect you've heard that so many times in the past few days that it's lost all meaning. If it helps at all I loved her too. She was probably my best friend."
"I don't know what to do Quistis," he said. His voice was quiet and weak as if he had made it raw from shouting. "I just sit here all day and wish for death so I don't have to be alone anymore."
"I have no family," he continued. "I'm all alone in the world. No family at all, and now the one true love of my life has gone. Forever. I may as well be dead too"
It was heartbreaking to see him in that state. He had given up on life. Forgotten the joys were able to feel in life, he only felt the pain and no one could console him. I didn't even try, we just sat in silence, both praying to hear Selphies voice again. But the room remained still. Eventually I spoke, the silence was over whelming and I thought I might die myself if I sat there any longer in that quiet room.
"It's starting soon", I meant the funeral of course. "I'II go and let you get changed". I think he was pleased to be alone again. I breathed a sigh of relief as soon as I escaped the oppression of Irvine's room.
I went back to the quad which was empty but for a few wondering students. I looked over the railing to the moving ground. The garden was moving towards the old orphanage for Selphies burial. I guess it was Squalls idea but if I were in the position to make that decision the Garden would be traveling in exactly the same direction. I had underestimated the time it would take to get there. As we'd only just passed over FH I guessed it would take at least another three hours to get to the Centra continent. I had nothing to do and the training center was beckoning but when I returned to my room to fetch my whip I lay down for what should have only been a few seconds but I ended up falling into a deep sleep to make up for the lack of it last night.
I was dreaming, I must have been. Selphie was sitting on the end of my bed her back to me, her head was hung low. But her dress was ripped and torn she had chunks of hair missing and long deep scratch marks on her back and shoulders.
"Quistis" she said in a voice that echoed around my room. "Quistis save me" she whispered. I tried to speak but for some reason the words were muffled and inaudible. When I looked down I saw that my clothes were in the same ruined tatters as Selphies and there were red raw scratch marks down my arms. I stared at my hands. They were bound together but not by an ordinary rope or tape, my wrists were held together by a string of feathers but no matter how hard I pulled the feathers would not come apart and my wrists were still bound together.
Selphie slowly rose from the bed and turned. I was able to see the full extent of her injuries. Her body was black and blue and her knee was turned at an unnatural angle and her shoulder was hanging from its socket. The long scratches covered her body, she had a split lip and dried blood surrounded her mouth. It was a horrifying sight but I didn't look away or shudder under her frightening glaze. All I felt was sympathy, for somehow I knew her death had been a terrible, terrifying one.
"Quistis, forgive her", she said. "Forgive her. It was for love" I had no idea what she meant but again my words were inaudible. I realized my mouth was bound with tape. I was bound and gagged.
"Only two emotions. Love and hatred" she continued to puzzle me. "Forgive her. It was for love," she repeated. Then her broken body rose of the floor. In a burst of light she flung out her arms. She looked down on me and smiled, I felt tears on my cheeks. Suddenly she exploded into a burst of feathers. Hundreds and hundreds of white feathers filled the room. I watched them for a few seconds then watched an individual one float slowly onto my bed, the first one to hit anything solid. As it touched the bed cover I woke.
My body jolted up and I felt my self-gasping for air. I sat for a few moment getting my breath and senses back, then I broke into tears my body shuddered and shook with every violent sob. I cried for the state Selphie had been in, for the fear I now felt about being bound and I cried because I didn't understand. I couldn't understand what she meant, what she wanted me to know or do. It was like I was betraying her last wishes. After a few minutes I managed to compose myself. I went to the bathroom and splashed cold water on my face, sorted and made myself look presentable. When I returned to my bedroom, I looked out of the window just in time to see Garden stop and ground itself near the orphanage.
I walked from my room unsteadily, still shaking slightly from the memory of the dream. Up ahead of me in the corridor was Zell, standing waiting for me, I guessed.
"Quistis!" He shouted when he saw me. "Hey, Quistis. Are you okay? You look really pale!" I nodded in reply; it was all I could manage.
"Uh, are you sure?" He checked. I nodded again. "Okay then, we'd better go, it'll start soon"
We made our way slowly out of the Garden towards the large gathering of SeeDs and students, all dressed in formal uniform. When we neared the crowd parted slightly, as they recognized our authority. We had reserved seats around the coffin and a second after I'd sat in mine, I felt a pair of strong hands squeeze my shoulders gently. I looked up to see Seifer smiling kindly down at me and I couldn't help returning his smile despite the situation and all the staring faces. The sky was dark completely covered by clouds, no light got through. It looked lie a storm was coming, I prayed the rain would hold out until it was finished.
"Friends, students, SeeDs and family" Headmaster Cid began looking round. "We are here today not to mourn the loss of a wonderful person but to celebrate the life we were all blessed to have been part of"
The closed coffin sat a few feet in front of me, black, shining, with yellow ribbons attached to the coffin. The same colour as her infamous dress. Across from the coffin sat Squall, by his side sat Rinoa. He knew I was looking in his direction but refused to meet my glaze and concentrated hard on Cid, his hand tightened around Rinoas and his knuckles paled to white. I gave up on Squall; it was going to take a long time for him to forgive me. My glance flickered to Rinoa. I was slightly taken aback when she stared straight at me, I tried to look away but her glaze was weirdly hypnotic. I swear I saw her lips curve into a malevolent smile. I looked down to her hand where I thought I'd seen a flash of white and in her free hand I saw her twirling a single white feather, exactly like the kind in my dream. I looked back up to her face and her vile smile had been replaced with an icy glaze. I felt my hands start to shake slightly and I knew that I had gone pale.
Irvine had risen slowly to the podium to address all the people gathered.
" As I'm sure many of you have now guessed, I loved Selphie." He said. "And it's not really hard to guess why. She was the happiest person I had ever met. She kept a lively spirit even in the darkest times; I think I only managed to get through Ultamecias time compression knowing she was on the other side. Its not really a surprise that she died helping a friend, doing what she loved to do, helping people"
At this point all eyes turned to Rinoa, who showed no emotion or embarrassment at being stared at by so many eyes. She just continued to stare at the podium.
"I don't think I can say anything else about her that you don't already know, So I'II stop here and leave you with your own individual memories of such an amazing and unique person. I only pray that you can find someone who brings as much joy to you heart as she did to mine" As he walked from the podium I could see the tears streaming down his cheeks, but he seemed happy at being able to finally say goodbye in such a beautiful way. I knew that Selphie would always have a large part of Irvine's heart but he would let go and go one with his life whilst always cherishing the memory of her.
The small party slowly broke up after the coffin was lowered and as the party started to wonder back to Garden the rain started to pour down. People started to run and just as I was about to join the runners a hand grabbed my elbow and pulled me back roughly.
"Well, you came back then?" said Rinoa, obviously disgusted by my return. "I wasn't sure if you'd return. And with him!" she said with revulsion practically spitting in Seifers direction, who was looking out at us front under the cover of the garden entrance.
"He was never fit to be a sorceresses knight. He failed her at every turn" this wasn't the mild Rinoa I had seen only a week ago, she had changed.
"Rinoa, I'm sorry" I didn't know what else to say. "I heard you were with Selphie when she died, it must have been terrible for you. I'm sorry you had to see something like that. I'm surprised you weren't hurt too, I guess it must be those sorceresses powers?" I was still finding it very hard to believe that Selphie would die like that; there was something unusual about the whole situation. Rinoa had been the only witness and her version of the whole thing had been accepted without question. I didn't know if I was so trusting of this new vicious side of her.
She flung me a look of hatred at my last comment and let go of my elbow. I almost ran away from her, but Rinoa just stood there in the rain, as her clothes and hair got soaked.
Seifer was still waiting for me and he put his arm over my shoulder protectively and I let my hand steal around his waist in return. He didn't ask me what had just happened, I think he'd guessed most of it but he was considerate enough not to ask for the details.
"You're soaked through" he said to me. "Come on or you'll freeze to death" I was starting to really care for this side of Seifer. We walked slowly to my room still held close together.
"Here you are," he said as we got to my room. But neither of us let go, we just continued to hold each other. He moved and turned to face me, his hand rose and gently touched my cheek. I knew what this meant and even though my head was telling me not to I leaned into his palm and kissed it gently. He leaned into me searching my face for permission and my small smile told him everything. Our lips brushed for a delicate second and then he kissed me so lovingly, so tenderly I felt my knees go weak and my heart almost stopped beating. The world around me stopped for those few seconds in the deepest most passionate kiss I had ever had. After a lifetime had passed, he pulled away, but a lifetime didn't seem long enough to me, I longed to feel his lips on mine again, forever maybe.
"Quistis.I.I don't know what to say," he said. "But, I think I'm falling in love with you" He whispered into my ear.
"I think I'm falling in love with you too" was the only thing I could or wanted to say.
I took his hand and led him to my room. Where were made love more tenderly, gently and lovingly than I'd ever thought possible. Two souls joined together for what I knew would last for eternity and beyond.
Ahhh.didn't I promise songs and stuff!? Sorry Quall people! I love them too and one day in the not to distant future I will write one, I promise!
"The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before." Good Will Hunting
The next morning I awoke to bright sunshine pouring in through the windows straight into my eyes. I was glad of the good weather though, it seemed to me that the sun had come out just for Selphie, to remind us of what she was like; happy, bubbly, and lovely.
I walked into my bathroom and instead of jumpimg quickly into the shower as I had always done, I simply sat on the edge of the bathtub, distracted by my thoughts. I had a quick shower and rushed to get changed into my formal SeeD uniform. Selphie, one of my dearest friends, would be put in the earth today. Memories of her ran through my mind and my tears dropped into the bath tub. When I was younger I had put friendship to the back of my mind as I pursued my training to become a SeeD, as an adult I hadn't allowed myself to become close to anyone for fear of being hurt or betrayed. But Selphie had broken down my stubborn walls by always being there for me and now I felt almost alone again. When I thought of those remaining in my life the image of Seifers face immediately entered my mind and I couldn't help but smile through my tears at the memory of his kindness.
I pulled myself together and dragged my weary body into the shower, I emerged soothed and quickly dressed in my formal SeeD uniform. I had a few hours until the funeral started so I wondered around a very quiet Garden and eventually ended up at the quad, where preparations for another garden festival were half finished but abandoned now with the loss of the head of the committee. I made my way though the banners and paper stremers, by the looks of things the theme this time was a masquerade ball, where everyone's face was covered by the masks they had made themselves. I was sure that the festival wouldn't go ahead without Selphie. It was a shame; everyone's efforts would go to waste.
I remembered what Zell told me last night about Irvine, about how badly he had taken it. I knew that I had to speak with him. He had truly loved Selphie, more than anyone had thought possible from the womanizer. But you could see the love in the eyes every time he looked at her and whenever her name was mentioned his lips would form a faint smile as if he was more proud of her than anything else in the world. I left the quad, which should have been full of joy, but was now a shrine to Selphie, a place of mourning and crepe paper.
He answered the door almost as soon as I had knocked on it. Irvine's eyes were red with black hollows under them. He was skinnier and his cheeks were gaunt. I had no words. Instead I took him in my arms and he cried on my shoulder for what seemed like an eternity.
"Oh, Irvine" I wept with him. "I don't know what to say. I want to say sorry, but I expect you've heard that so many times in the past few days that it's lost all meaning. If it helps at all I loved her too. She was probably my best friend."
"I don't know what to do Quistis," he said. His voice was quiet and weak as if he had made it raw from shouting. "I just sit here all day and wish for death so I don't have to be alone anymore."
"I have no family," he continued. "I'm all alone in the world. No family at all, and now the one true love of my life has gone. Forever. I may as well be dead too"
It was heartbreaking to see him in that state. He had given up on life. Forgotten the joys were able to feel in life, he only felt the pain and no one could console him. I didn't even try, we just sat in silence, both praying to hear Selphies voice again. But the room remained still. Eventually I spoke, the silence was over whelming and I thought I might die myself if I sat there any longer in that quiet room.
"It's starting soon", I meant the funeral of course. "I'II go and let you get changed". I think he was pleased to be alone again. I breathed a sigh of relief as soon as I escaped the oppression of Irvine's room.
I went back to the quad which was empty but for a few wondering students. I looked over the railing to the moving ground. The garden was moving towards the old orphanage for Selphies burial. I guess it was Squalls idea but if I were in the position to make that decision the Garden would be traveling in exactly the same direction. I had underestimated the time it would take to get there. As we'd only just passed over FH I guessed it would take at least another three hours to get to the Centra continent. I had nothing to do and the training center was beckoning but when I returned to my room to fetch my whip I lay down for what should have only been a few seconds but I ended up falling into a deep sleep to make up for the lack of it last night.
I was dreaming, I must have been. Selphie was sitting on the end of my bed her back to me, her head was hung low. But her dress was ripped and torn she had chunks of hair missing and long deep scratch marks on her back and shoulders.
"Quistis" she said in a voice that echoed around my room. "Quistis save me" she whispered. I tried to speak but for some reason the words were muffled and inaudible. When I looked down I saw that my clothes were in the same ruined tatters as Selphies and there were red raw scratch marks down my arms. I stared at my hands. They were bound together but not by an ordinary rope or tape, my wrists were held together by a string of feathers but no matter how hard I pulled the feathers would not come apart and my wrists were still bound together.
Selphie slowly rose from the bed and turned. I was able to see the full extent of her injuries. Her body was black and blue and her knee was turned at an unnatural angle and her shoulder was hanging from its socket. The long scratches covered her body, she had a split lip and dried blood surrounded her mouth. It was a horrifying sight but I didn't look away or shudder under her frightening glaze. All I felt was sympathy, for somehow I knew her death had been a terrible, terrifying one.
"Quistis, forgive her", she said. "Forgive her. It was for love" I had no idea what she meant but again my words were inaudible. I realized my mouth was bound with tape. I was bound and gagged.
"Only two emotions. Love and hatred" she continued to puzzle me. "Forgive her. It was for love," she repeated. Then her broken body rose of the floor. In a burst of light she flung out her arms. She looked down on me and smiled, I felt tears on my cheeks. Suddenly she exploded into a burst of feathers. Hundreds and hundreds of white feathers filled the room. I watched them for a few seconds then watched an individual one float slowly onto my bed, the first one to hit anything solid. As it touched the bed cover I woke.
My body jolted up and I felt my self-gasping for air. I sat for a few moment getting my breath and senses back, then I broke into tears my body shuddered and shook with every violent sob. I cried for the state Selphie had been in, for the fear I now felt about being bound and I cried because I didn't understand. I couldn't understand what she meant, what she wanted me to know or do. It was like I was betraying her last wishes. After a few minutes I managed to compose myself. I went to the bathroom and splashed cold water on my face, sorted and made myself look presentable. When I returned to my bedroom, I looked out of the window just in time to see Garden stop and ground itself near the orphanage.
I walked from my room unsteadily, still shaking slightly from the memory of the dream. Up ahead of me in the corridor was Zell, standing waiting for me, I guessed.
"Quistis!" He shouted when he saw me. "Hey, Quistis. Are you okay? You look really pale!" I nodded in reply; it was all I could manage.
"Uh, are you sure?" He checked. I nodded again. "Okay then, we'd better go, it'll start soon"
We made our way slowly out of the Garden towards the large gathering of SeeDs and students, all dressed in formal uniform. When we neared the crowd parted slightly, as they recognized our authority. We had reserved seats around the coffin and a second after I'd sat in mine, I felt a pair of strong hands squeeze my shoulders gently. I looked up to see Seifer smiling kindly down at me and I couldn't help returning his smile despite the situation and all the staring faces. The sky was dark completely covered by clouds, no light got through. It looked lie a storm was coming, I prayed the rain would hold out until it was finished.
"Friends, students, SeeDs and family" Headmaster Cid began looking round. "We are here today not to mourn the loss of a wonderful person but to celebrate the life we were all blessed to have been part of"
The closed coffin sat a few feet in front of me, black, shining, with yellow ribbons attached to the coffin. The same colour as her infamous dress. Across from the coffin sat Squall, by his side sat Rinoa. He knew I was looking in his direction but refused to meet my glaze and concentrated hard on Cid, his hand tightened around Rinoas and his knuckles paled to white. I gave up on Squall; it was going to take a long time for him to forgive me. My glance flickered to Rinoa. I was slightly taken aback when she stared straight at me, I tried to look away but her glaze was weirdly hypnotic. I swear I saw her lips curve into a malevolent smile. I looked down to her hand where I thought I'd seen a flash of white and in her free hand I saw her twirling a single white feather, exactly like the kind in my dream. I looked back up to her face and her vile smile had been replaced with an icy glaze. I felt my hands start to shake slightly and I knew that I had gone pale.
Irvine had risen slowly to the podium to address all the people gathered.
" As I'm sure many of you have now guessed, I loved Selphie." He said. "And it's not really hard to guess why. She was the happiest person I had ever met. She kept a lively spirit even in the darkest times; I think I only managed to get through Ultamecias time compression knowing she was on the other side. Its not really a surprise that she died helping a friend, doing what she loved to do, helping people"
At this point all eyes turned to Rinoa, who showed no emotion or embarrassment at being stared at by so many eyes. She just continued to stare at the podium.
"I don't think I can say anything else about her that you don't already know, So I'II stop here and leave you with your own individual memories of such an amazing and unique person. I only pray that you can find someone who brings as much joy to you heart as she did to mine" As he walked from the podium I could see the tears streaming down his cheeks, but he seemed happy at being able to finally say goodbye in such a beautiful way. I knew that Selphie would always have a large part of Irvine's heart but he would let go and go one with his life whilst always cherishing the memory of her.
The small party slowly broke up after the coffin was lowered and as the party started to wonder back to Garden the rain started to pour down. People started to run and just as I was about to join the runners a hand grabbed my elbow and pulled me back roughly.
"Well, you came back then?" said Rinoa, obviously disgusted by my return. "I wasn't sure if you'd return. And with him!" she said with revulsion practically spitting in Seifers direction, who was looking out at us front under the cover of the garden entrance.
"He was never fit to be a sorceresses knight. He failed her at every turn" this wasn't the mild Rinoa I had seen only a week ago, she had changed.
"Rinoa, I'm sorry" I didn't know what else to say. "I heard you were with Selphie when she died, it must have been terrible for you. I'm sorry you had to see something like that. I'm surprised you weren't hurt too, I guess it must be those sorceresses powers?" I was still finding it very hard to believe that Selphie would die like that; there was something unusual about the whole situation. Rinoa had been the only witness and her version of the whole thing had been accepted without question. I didn't know if I was so trusting of this new vicious side of her.
She flung me a look of hatred at my last comment and let go of my elbow. I almost ran away from her, but Rinoa just stood there in the rain, as her clothes and hair got soaked.
Seifer was still waiting for me and he put his arm over my shoulder protectively and I let my hand steal around his waist in return. He didn't ask me what had just happened, I think he'd guessed most of it but he was considerate enough not to ask for the details.
"You're soaked through" he said to me. "Come on or you'll freeze to death" I was starting to really care for this side of Seifer. We walked slowly to my room still held close together.
"Here you are," he said as we got to my room. But neither of us let go, we just continued to hold each other. He moved and turned to face me, his hand rose and gently touched my cheek. I knew what this meant and even though my head was telling me not to I leaned into his palm and kissed it gently. He leaned into me searching my face for permission and my small smile told him everything. Our lips brushed for a delicate second and then he kissed me so lovingly, so tenderly I felt my knees go weak and my heart almost stopped beating. The world around me stopped for those few seconds in the deepest most passionate kiss I had ever had. After a lifetime had passed, he pulled away, but a lifetime didn't seem long enough to me, I longed to feel his lips on mine again, forever maybe.
"Quistis.I.I don't know what to say," he said. "But, I think I'm falling in love with you" He whispered into my ear.
"I think I'm falling in love with you too" was the only thing I could or wanted to say.
I took his hand and led him to my room. Where were made love more tenderly, gently and lovingly than I'd ever thought possible. Two souls joined together for what I knew would last for eternity and beyond.
Ahhh.didn't I promise songs and stuff!? Sorry Quall people! I love them too and one day in the not to distant future I will write one, I promise!