Maria and Kurt walked in silence as either of them tried to find the right words to say. They walked for so long without speaking that they ended up on the very bench that they all had learned DO-RE-MI on. However, since both were lost in deep thought neither seemed to notice right away. Finally, it was Kurt who broke the ice by asking the question that had been bottled up inside him for seven years.
"Why?" That was all he managed to get out. Before he had been so excited to see Fraulein Maria that he didn't think that he could be angry. But now that he had a chance to think about it, Kurt was angry about his governess leaving without saying good bye.
Maria didn't have to hear anymore from him. She knew what he meant and now came the hard part, piecing everything together.
"Kurt…..I, um….left because something happened at the villa that wasn't supposed to happen…" she was about to go on when he interrupted her.
"What happened? Was it something that we all did???" Now he was confused completely.
"Please let me get all of this out before you say anything else. It's very hard for me to even think about this let alone talk about it." She took a minute to gather her thoughts and continued. "When I was told I was going to be a governess to you and your siblings I planned on fulfilling my role to my best abilities. I didn't plan on any distractions along the way and when I heard news of the Baroness, I believed my purposed was to prepare you all for a new mother that summer." She paused again to see Kurt's reaction. And the look on his face showed that he was paying close attention to what Maria had to say.
"I left the night of the party because of something that happened long before that night…"
"Did that something happen to be involved with the way you and father danced?" Kurt's question was completely accurate and this time Maria didn't scold him for his interruption. Instead, she just looked at her feet trying to collect her thoughts.
"You know, I didn't think in a million years that I would find a kind and gentle person in your father." Kurt had to smile at that comment. "In fact, I didn't even think that after the day he and I fought by the lake that I ever wanted to associate with him again. But then everything changed. Something sparked along the way and I began to see him in a new light."
"A good new light? Because everything seemed to run much more smoothly in the villa once you two got along better." This time it was Maria's turn to smile. Not because of Kurt's comment, but because of how she remembered the night the Captain sang Edelweiss. Kurt's comment made her remember how she couldn't take her eyes away from the Captain's.
"Actually, yes Kurt. It was a good new light. You see, as a postulant, my life was set out to be devoted to God. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with your father. And somewhere along the line he seemed to fall in love with me." At that moment Maria had to stand up and take a breath because she wasn't sure of how Kurt would react.
"If you loved him then why didn't you tell him? You could have saved us all from being stuck with the Baroness and you could have been our new mother. Didn't you want any of that? You were perfect for the role and you just walked out of our lives without telling us any of this?!?" By now Kurt was standing, facing Maria and anger was boiling inside him and he felt his ability to control it slipping away.
"Don't you think that I wanted to tell your father? Don't you think I wanted to have you all as my own children? It simply wasn't my place. I was the governess!"
"What did that have to do with anything? It never stopped you before from speaking what you were feeling??"
At this time Maria spun around and was ready to throw back whatever Kurt dealt to her. Yes, she could recognize that he was angry, but something inside of her made her feel the same way.
"It had to do with everything, Kurt! I was sent to your household to take care of the seven of you. Nowhere in the job description did it say to fall in love with my employer! Nowhere!"
"I don't even care about that. Didn't you even think of how your leaving would affect the seven of us! We all loved you. You were the first governess we ever had that became our friend and someone we could all trust and get to know! You don't know how badly we felt when we found out you were gone! We all thought we had done something to offend you that made you leave."
Maria's eyes stung with tears now and she could feel her heart ready to burst out of her chest. Mixed with anger and sorrow for what she had put this family through, she could no longer control her emotions.
"Kurt why did you wait until now to tell me all of this?!? It has been seven years, did you come all this way and wait all this time to come back here and yell at me?"
"No! I came back here to find you and bring you home with me. Even though we are grown up since then, we still need a mother and I know that you have never stopped loving father since the day you left. You can't escape that and you know it!"
"Are you mad! How do you even know if your father still thinks of me let alone still have loving feelings for me? It is insane that is what it is!"
"I know because he had said things about you and he ever since the day we arrived in America. He still loves you because he has told us. Yet, he is too stubborn to admit that he should have told you all this many years ago!"
Tears were now running down Maria's cheeks and she couldn't believe what Kurt had just told her. The Captain still in love with her???? It was impossible. She had just been a governess to his children for one summer in what seemed like a century ago. Could she really go back and face him? What if he didn't every acknowledge her?
"Kurt, I simply cannot go back with you. And I am sorry you thought that you could persuade me to do such a thing. My place is here. This is my home and I just can't leave it right now."
"Why not? He loves you and you love him. You already admitted to it why can't you just live up to it and face him?"
Rage was boiling inside him now. He was way past the stage of anger. But what he couldn't figure out was why she was being so obstinate about the situation. He knew that she wanted to go with him. He could see it in her eyes from the moment they saw each other again.
"Kurt, I simply cannot do it and that's final. I am terribly sorry to disappoint you."
And with that Maria was about to bid him farewell when Kurt's fuse went off.
"The Fraulein Maria that I knew once told me that you had to face what life gave you and that all your problems could be solved by confronting them. Where is that woman who taught me all that now? If you run away from this now you will regret it for the rest of your life. I know it and so do you. I'm sorry, too Fraulein. But I'm sorry because of how you're feeling right now and that you won't face your problems….I'm here for four more days before I have to return home and start school. I truly hope you will consider my offer to join me. If you don't then I hope your life is well that you are happy in whatever you do."
And with that, Kurt walked away from the woman that he loved so very much as a friend. In doing so, tears were now streaming down his face. And his body began to shake because he felt stupid for the way he approached the situation. He hoped that what he had said made sense to Maria, though.
Maria couldn't believe what Kurt had just said. He had been so shy and coy as a young boy. She was proud of his actions, though. He reminded her of his father in so many ways. What was she to do now?
To be continued…..
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