Summary: The Mole hits Mr. Garrison unconcious with his shovel, so the kids ditch school in favor of Kenny's house, only to find that Kenny has gone phycho.
Rating: Rated PG-13 for uncensored swearing mostly, no smut or anything.
A/N: Having read some other fanfiction, I relised that my story for why The Mole is back is not as original as I had hoped, I swear I came to it with my own logic and did not knowingly take someone else's idea.
Jesus Needs Help
"Jesus, did you ever have the problem that you where becoming just like your father?"
"Yes, my son, at one point people even thought I -was- my father, which is strange considering the lack of family resemblance."
"Could you not call me that?", requested Kenny, refering to "son".
"Of course, my... anyway, tell me more about this about becoming like your father."
"The problem, you see, is that I'm becomeing like you. I died to bring people back to life, and I talk like you, and the list of ways in which I resemble you goes on. But I'm doing it wrong, I guess, 'cause no one respects me, and..", said Kenny, knowing that he wasn't really making sence.
"Well, one way to address the problem of people not respecting you is stateing the conciquences for there actions.
Kenny interprited this for a moment.
"Ok, so bribe and threaten them."
"Yes, wait, no! That is NOT what you are supposed to do!", said Jesus angrily.
"Oh, right, ok, but the other problems?
Jesus looked somewhat put out. "There is NO problem with being like me. I am compassionent and modest, and I died to save you people!", Jesus said, befor he hung up on Kenny.
"Next caller!"
Cartman turned of the TV.
"Well, Kenny," he said in tones of mock sympathy, "I think maybe you're just screwed."
"Yeah, and we're screwed to. We don't have anything to do!", said Kyle hopelessly.
Stan tried to think possibilities. "Well, we can't go over to my house, aunt Flow's over, so my mom's being a real bitch."
A grin came across Cartman's face, and he started to sing under his breath.
"Wee-e-lll... Stan's mom is a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the hole wide world..", he sang, gradually becomeing quieter untill he was just moveing his mouth and makeing exagerated facial expressions.
"I can find it in my heart to forgive you, Stan.", said Kyle, playfully ruffleing Stan's hair under his hat.
"Oh, Stan!", cried Cartman, ruffleing Stan's hair untill his hat fell of, in a hienous exageration of Kyle.
Kyle looked modestly offended.
"I didn't do -that-!"
"Ahh..", said Kenny knowingly. "Not on the outside, but on the inside..."
A/N Again: Sorry I took so long getting this chapter up! It was a combination of writer's block and an addictive new video game.
To all the people who have been reveiwing my story (you know who you are), thank you! I love getting feedback, but not as in the kind you get from a microphone. That feedback sucks.
Rating: Rated PG-13 for uncensored swearing mostly, no smut or anything.
A/N: Having read some other fanfiction, I relised that my story for why The Mole is back is not as original as I had hoped, I swear I came to it with my own logic and did not knowingly take someone else's idea.
Jesus Needs Help
"Jesus, did you ever have the problem that you where becoming just like your father?"
"Yes, my son, at one point people even thought I -was- my father, which is strange considering the lack of family resemblance."
"Could you not call me that?", requested Kenny, refering to "son".
"Of course, my... anyway, tell me more about this about becoming like your father."
"The problem, you see, is that I'm becomeing like you. I died to bring people back to life, and I talk like you, and the list of ways in which I resemble you goes on. But I'm doing it wrong, I guess, 'cause no one respects me, and..", said Kenny, knowing that he wasn't really making sence.
"Well, one way to address the problem of people not respecting you is stateing the conciquences for there actions.
Kenny interprited this for a moment.
"Ok, so bribe and threaten them."
"Yes, wait, no! That is NOT what you are supposed to do!", said Jesus angrily.
"Oh, right, ok, but the other problems?
Jesus looked somewhat put out. "There is NO problem with being like me. I am compassionent and modest, and I died to save you people!", Jesus said, befor he hung up on Kenny.
"Next caller!"
Cartman turned of the TV.
"Well, Kenny," he said in tones of mock sympathy, "I think maybe you're just screwed."
"Yeah, and we're screwed to. We don't have anything to do!", said Kyle hopelessly.
Stan tried to think possibilities. "Well, we can't go over to my house, aunt Flow's over, so my mom's being a real bitch."
A grin came across Cartman's face, and he started to sing under his breath.
"Wee-e-lll... Stan's mom is a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the hole wide world..", he sang, gradually becomeing quieter untill he was just moveing his mouth and makeing exagerated facial expressions.
"I can find it in my heart to forgive you, Stan.", said Kyle, playfully ruffleing Stan's hair under his hat.
"Oh, Stan!", cried Cartman, ruffleing Stan's hair untill his hat fell of, in a hienous exageration of Kyle.
Kyle looked modestly offended.
"I didn't do -that-!"
"Ahh..", said Kenny knowingly. "Not on the outside, but on the inside..."
A/N Again: Sorry I took so long getting this chapter up! It was a combination of writer's block and an addictive new video game.
To all the people who have been reveiwing my story (you know who you are), thank you! I love getting feedback, but not as in the kind you get from a microphone. That feedback sucks.