disclaimer- dnt own Ahmed, dont own Vet, dont own Vimes ( i wish i did, he could be MY pet...) oh dear. my hideous attempt at a rhyming disclaimer. im sorry. i dont know what came over me.

well, my small but loyal fanbase of reviewers (thats you, luska) heres another chapter. i have been released into half term and ah, how the creative juices are flowing. just look at them, dribbling all over the place. ok, this is a less action more explanatory chapter. but, damn me for my twisty turny plot if u will, i've managed to not actually explain that much. hehe. more coming soon, if i have time.

to my reviewers-

waves-sama, come back and review! haven't seen you in a while now.
sunny-historian- so glad u enjoyed it. i know about the mental leaps, but hey, thats what fan fic is all about! i hope u like this chap too.
anniewilkes1- hey, i just write what the plot bunnies tell me to! im their slave, you know. but dnt woz. theres sum Vimes/Vet 'action' coming up in chapter 6.
starrygazer- i'm glad u agree with my ahmed. hes just such a mystery i thought wud be fun to have him keeping vet on his toes!
coriander eisenhower- what a cool name. i like the idea of myself as a pioneering fanfic writer, at the head of a big boat named 'the vimes/ahmed slasher'. anyway. i digress.
freegiveaway- glad u like. heres more. so give me the reviews i crave (i'm a review junkie. im not afraid to admit it. i go to meetings and everything.)
mistress arion- thankyou! means a lot to have such a fanfic genius review me.
Drumknott- sign ur name next time! vimes will NOT go spare, i'll have you know. we've spoken about the issue and i believe you were acting entirely without authority on your own jealous whims. shame on you!
fluffywombat- am awaiting ur next chap. thanx for reviewing- and liked the bio, btw. i cant believe u plugged me! it brought a happy tear to my computer weary eye.
nessa1- ah, my fanfic doppelganger. yr 13 is indeed still hell but half term has arrived. i love ur review simply cos it was the one that finally brought me up to 20 reviews. YAY!

Luska-i've one word for you. DAVID. hehe. telephonic communications will soon be breached, i assure you. meantimes, hope u enjoy. sims 2 arrives chez ici soon! u must must must visit. or il go back to calling you 'the tramp'.

NYA loves you all.

Chapter 5- The Tempest

Vimes didn't react. Despite himself, Ahmed felt a little disappointed. Drama and convention dictated a gasp, a jump to the feet, a ringing slap round Ahmed's face, even a strangled 'what?' But Vimes just sat there. Presently Ahmed began to feel uncomfortable, something the diamond-hard desert policeman seldom felt. When Ahmed was around, it was other people who felt uncomfortable. Usually because they had their hands tied behind their back and knife pricking their ribcage. Ahmed was a very direct person.

'Vimes?' he said uncertainly, inwardly marvelling at the range of emotions the man was making him feel. 'Are you alright?' Vimes snorted.

'Look at you, pussyfooting around me. Do you know what the current guild price is on my head? Half a million dollars. It wouldn't be that high if I hadn't put a good few of you fellows away in my time, which I have. People try to kill me everyday of my life, I'm used to it.' Ahmed kept his face carefully blank.

'Why so quiet then? If you're so used to it?

'But those are people from my city. Up close and personal. I'm wondering why someone in Klatch would want to kill me so badly. I mean, I have this gift for annoying people, but from that distance? Something doesn't fit. And I'm sitting here trying to work it out, because I'll be damned if I'm asking you, you smug bastard.' Ahmed grinned sheepishly. 'And also,' Vimes began to get more heated, 'I want to know how I missed this. My informants are the best out there, save his lordship's. They got the plot, but they got the wrong man- ' Ahmed interrupted.

'You can speculate all day, or you can let me tell you what's going on.' Vimes was silent, so Ahmed continued.

'Its not a Klatchian who wants you dead, Vimes. It's a Morporkian who has the kind of rich and powerful friends to whom you are nothing. A speck of fly dirt on a page. That's all. But they have been convinced that you are in their way. They have been convinced it would be a good idea if you were removed. And they have the money to hire the best to do it.' Icy clarity began to flood Vimes' mind. The bastard. The complete and utter bastard.

Suddenly Vimes banged his fist down on the table. Ahmed didn't even jump.

'I want to KNOW' Vimes began, and then was surprised to find that he was shouting. 'I want to know-'

Ahmed ran a weary hand over his eyes. It was the first time Vimes had ever seen the man tired. Even when they'd been together, Ahmed had been the first up, the last to sleep, dark eyes always alert and watchful. Yes. Watchful. That was the word all right.

'I want to know who hired you.' Ahmed sighed. Vimes was suddenly angrier than he had ever been in his life. In one movement his chair was clattering to the floor and Ahmed's throat was in his grip. He drove the other man up and inexorably backwards, where he hit the wall with a shuddering crash. Vimes' only picture, an iconograph of the scowling ranks of watchmen, dropped to the floor.

'Vimes-' Ahmed croaked. He had a knife at Vimes' stomach. One careful slash, that was all it would take. But-

'You can't, can you?' Vimes sneered in his ear. 'You've been here three weeks; if you were going to do it you should have done it by now. But you can't. You can't kill me, you cowardly bastard. I'm glad. It would shame me to be done in by someone as pathetic as you.' He released the Assassin then spat bitterly on the floor.

'You don't understand,' Ahmed said quietly, sheathing his knife.

'What's left to understand? You were hired to kill me. And you came here and you pretended to be my friend, more than my friend, and all the while you were going to kill me. You've made a fool of me, Ahmed. I can't forgive you that.' Ahmed blinked. There were tears standing in his eyes.

'Don't you want to know why?' He burst out. 'I love you! I love you! I can't fucking kill you because I love you too damn much. Which is why I was sent here in the first place.'

Vimes' face was a blank mask. His silence left a void that Ahmed couldn't help but try and fill.

'It's jealousy. I'm here because a jealous woman knew how I felt about you. A jealous and clever woman. And when I denied it she said to me, 'prove it. Prove you don't love him.' Ahmed was talking to himself now. Vimes felt as though he was in the middle of a raging storm but he could see an even bigger, blacker cloud on the horizon. And he knew that whatever he felt now, it was nothing, nothing compared to what would happen when that cloud broke. With a throat as dry as the sun-bleached bones of the desert, he spoke.

'Go on.'

'I'd kept away. It was a year, a whole year since I had seen you. But she knew. She always knows.' He began to laugh, but it had a manic edge to it. On cue, because there are some conventions stronger than mere meteorology, thunder growled in the air.

'She said you were dangerous. And if I didn't love you, then I would kill you. And if I didn't kill you, then she would kill me. For betraying her.'

The tiny hairs were up on the back of Vimes' neck.

'Who?' he almost snarled. But he knew the answer already.

Ahmed turned tortured eyes towards Vimes face.

'My wife,' he said.

And then the storm broke over their heads.