Disclaimer- ok, honestly do you think I own Harry Potter stuff after this
many chapters? Ah no. I smell sarcasm.
A/N oh I just love that!!! Author's note! Author's note! Author's note! Thanks to all my faithful reviewers. Amy, Roseskyfire, and Analynne I heart you! Come to think of it I also love all the other random names that I thought of and reviewed my own story with. I think it is quite pathetic! You should review so that I don't get fake pleasure from seeing a review that I wrote with random letters, abbreviations of my name, and nicknames. REVIEW, GOSH DARN IT! REVIEW!!! $%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$% They were at the hospital now thanks to Lily's parents. She'd been in that room for hours.
"What's happening Mrs. Evans? When will Lily come out?"
"First off, please call me Manda; Mrs. Evans makes me feel old and wrinkly. And quite frankly, I'm not even forty. Second off, Lily is absolutely right you are like madly in love with her. I'll give you some tips to "seduce" Lily later. Third off, you have been asking me those same two questions for like the past two and a half hours and sweetie, the answer is still, get ready for the big answer...drum roll please, bum bum bum bum bum da da da da and the answer isssssss are you ready James, I don't know if you can handle this? [Cause my body's too bootylicious!] Ok- here we go and the answer issssssssssssssssssssssss....................................... no."
"Mrs. Um oh sorry, Manda, are you being sarcastic with me? I don't know if I like that tone of voice, I mean mother-in-laws are supposed to be evil and all but...you know I just thought you were different.....not like weird different, just like not like anyone else...not that that's bad, and yeah I just thought that—"
"First off, stop talking before you get hurt. Second off, what do you mean mother-in-law?! You have it bad. You're cornier than a chick-flick! How are you the annoying freak that Lily talks about, I just don't see it? Oh, wait. I did this many times in my day...step 1-get all close to the parents step 2-parents tell son how cute and nice they are step 3- hott boy is pressured into asking me out! "I just love mind games, boys hate them, but I tell ya they do tend to work."
"Manda, you are evil."
"Hey, don't get any ideas here; I'm speaking for most girls."
"Does my Lily do this?"
"What do you mean my Lily?"
"Umm, well I meant like well um."
"I don't like possessive people. Are you a possessive person?"
"No ma'am."
"Are you calling me ma'am?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Don't."
"Yes...Manda."
"If you want a good word from me to my daughter, you better shape up. I don't like your attitude."
"Yes Manda."
"So, Am I doing good at this whole evil mother-in-law thingy?"
"Whoa! That was a trick?!"
"Well, yes. Just keep in mind, it won't be if you're possessive. Comprende?"
"Yep!"
"Ok-y doke-y! So when is Lily, my baby coming out?"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! I sense a hypocrite in the room, and its not me!!!! I don't like possessive people either and didn't you just tell me that you didn't want me to keep asking that question?"
"Yeah, well...it may not look it, but I'm over 18 and I can be a hypocrite...so HA! It's the law!"
"Oh who made that law?!"
"Well, that's not the point. So tell me what were you doing in a tree with Lily? Nonetheless, Willa? I'm curious, only people she likes can get axis to the tree. No one knows about her. Heck, I only found out about Willa when I was snooping—I mean cleaning."
"Snooping? Lily was right! Everybody thinks she's paranoid, but she was right! You do look through her stuff!!!! Oooooooooooooo baaaaaaaad Manda!!! Baaaaaaaaad Mommy. Shame on you! Tsk. Tsk. Let me slap your wrists."
"I never said that, ok. You tell her you die. Then you won't even be able to dream about me being your mother-in-law. Understand? Good. Conversation over. Sooooooooooooooooooooooo, tell me what you were doing in a tree with Lily."
"I'm stalking her."
"What?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"
"Kidding. Duh. I was visiting her and we fell asleep in the tree. I woke up around midnight. She was having a dream. She must have been having a bad one, because she was kicking and screaming, and she kicked me really hard in my erm, um, 'area' and she fell out of the tree. Then her pocket started ringing and—" "I was on the phone," Rose had come back from peeing and startled everybody," I was telling her about my day and James started talking to me. I like totally freaked out when I heard she was hurt and came out to help you guys."
"I see you've changed my little beauty queen."
"Oh shut the [bleeps herself out to add affect] up James!"
"What was up with all that Portuguese crap?"
"Don't say crap, future-son-in-law."
"That's mean, mommy-in-law!"
"Ok! That's creepy James, stop flirting with Mandy!"
"Shut it you!"
"I think my future-son-in-law is very cute and I really don't see why Lily doesn't date him."
"Excuse me while I hurl Manda."
"You're just jealous of my good looking, good looks Rose!"
"Now ladies!!!"
"Sorry to correct you Manda, but if James was a girl, he would most definitely not be a lady. Furthermore, god I sound like some kind of speech person, anyway he's an It, but he's mot even an It-l mean so there really is no point in addressing him. In fact when he was born, James's parents flipped a coin to see if he should be raised as a man or a woman. As you can see they chose the male species." [NSR wants to thank the Friends writing crew for that lovely idea].
"You're despicable Rose. I am most defiantly not an It. I am of the Male race—"
"Race?!"
"Yes, race, and I have the good to prove it. In fact there is a very large shipment of the goods...if you know what I mean."
"That is a horrible conversation to be having as kids your age! I can't believe you! And Lily's going to be telling you about how I had no place saying this because of the Xavia- Tale of the Happy Hooker book, but that's not the point and everybody read it! Someone through it out of the bus window! It went around the whole school. It's not like I bought it!!!!"
"Manda, you will regret that little paragraph for the rest of your life probably now."
"Good point James. Mwahahaha!!!"
"Oh shit."
"Amanda Evans! I don't want to hear that kind of language...unless we can swear and talk about profanity too!" they said in unison.
"Damnit! Ok. It's a deal. I hate this whole hold back your language thing anyway."
"Cool!"
"Fuck you James!!!!"
"What was that for?!"
"I Rose Colleen Daniels am merely celebrating my freedom to swear and speak of and or in profanity."
"Oh. Ok. Shit!!!!"
"Bastard!"
"Bitch!"
"Fuck you! Jinx!...Knock on wood! God Damn it! Jinx! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
"Oh lord what have I done? I should never have let them swear."
"Hahahahahaha;" Rose sticks up her middle finger,"Fuck you tiny freak! No one will ever want to fondle your balls!"
"Shut it! You are an embarrassment to humans! Yippy for Gay Marriages!!! Fuck you homophobics!!!!!!!!!!"
"Whoooooooooooooo..............wait! James I thought that you had a problem with gays."
"No I'm just not one."
"Oh...ok. whooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Bitches unite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Oh shit. What have I done?"
Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooooooooo!
They can swear openly. Be warned, if one day you can't find this, check out the R rated section!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love you! Review!!!!! NatsterSugerRush! Fuck you...j/k
A/N oh I just love that!!! Author's note! Author's note! Author's note! Thanks to all my faithful reviewers. Amy, Roseskyfire, and Analynne I heart you! Come to think of it I also love all the other random names that I thought of and reviewed my own story with. I think it is quite pathetic! You should review so that I don't get fake pleasure from seeing a review that I wrote with random letters, abbreviations of my name, and nicknames. REVIEW, GOSH DARN IT! REVIEW!!! $%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$%$% They were at the hospital now thanks to Lily's parents. She'd been in that room for hours.
"What's happening Mrs. Evans? When will Lily come out?"
"First off, please call me Manda; Mrs. Evans makes me feel old and wrinkly. And quite frankly, I'm not even forty. Second off, Lily is absolutely right you are like madly in love with her. I'll give you some tips to "seduce" Lily later. Third off, you have been asking me those same two questions for like the past two and a half hours and sweetie, the answer is still, get ready for the big answer...drum roll please, bum bum bum bum bum da da da da and the answer isssssss are you ready James, I don't know if you can handle this? [Cause my body's too bootylicious!] Ok- here we go and the answer issssssssssssssssssssssss....................................... no."
"Mrs. Um oh sorry, Manda, are you being sarcastic with me? I don't know if I like that tone of voice, I mean mother-in-laws are supposed to be evil and all but...you know I just thought you were different.....not like weird different, just like not like anyone else...not that that's bad, and yeah I just thought that—"
"First off, stop talking before you get hurt. Second off, what do you mean mother-in-law?! You have it bad. You're cornier than a chick-flick! How are you the annoying freak that Lily talks about, I just don't see it? Oh, wait. I did this many times in my day...step 1-get all close to the parents step 2-parents tell son how cute and nice they are step 3- hott boy is pressured into asking me out! "I just love mind games, boys hate them, but I tell ya they do tend to work."
"Manda, you are evil."
"Hey, don't get any ideas here; I'm speaking for most girls."
"Does my Lily do this?"
"What do you mean my Lily?"
"Umm, well I meant like well um."
"I don't like possessive people. Are you a possessive person?"
"No ma'am."
"Are you calling me ma'am?"
"Yes, ma'am."
"Don't."
"Yes...Manda."
"If you want a good word from me to my daughter, you better shape up. I don't like your attitude."
"Yes Manda."
"So, Am I doing good at this whole evil mother-in-law thingy?"
"Whoa! That was a trick?!"
"Well, yes. Just keep in mind, it won't be if you're possessive. Comprende?"
"Yep!"
"Ok-y doke-y! So when is Lily, my baby coming out?"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! I sense a hypocrite in the room, and its not me!!!! I don't like possessive people either and didn't you just tell me that you didn't want me to keep asking that question?"
"Yeah, well...it may not look it, but I'm over 18 and I can be a hypocrite...so HA! It's the law!"
"Oh who made that law?!"
"Well, that's not the point. So tell me what were you doing in a tree with Lily? Nonetheless, Willa? I'm curious, only people she likes can get axis to the tree. No one knows about her. Heck, I only found out about Willa when I was snooping—I mean cleaning."
"Snooping? Lily was right! Everybody thinks she's paranoid, but she was right! You do look through her stuff!!!! Oooooooooooooo baaaaaaaad Manda!!! Baaaaaaaaad Mommy. Shame on you! Tsk. Tsk. Let me slap your wrists."
"I never said that, ok. You tell her you die. Then you won't even be able to dream about me being your mother-in-law. Understand? Good. Conversation over. Sooooooooooooooooooooooo, tell me what you were doing in a tree with Lily."
"I'm stalking her."
"What?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!"
"Kidding. Duh. I was visiting her and we fell asleep in the tree. I woke up around midnight. She was having a dream. She must have been having a bad one, because she was kicking and screaming, and she kicked me really hard in my erm, um, 'area' and she fell out of the tree. Then her pocket started ringing and—" "I was on the phone," Rose had come back from peeing and startled everybody," I was telling her about my day and James started talking to me. I like totally freaked out when I heard she was hurt and came out to help you guys."
"I see you've changed my little beauty queen."
"Oh shut the [bleeps herself out to add affect] up James!"
"What was up with all that Portuguese crap?"
"Don't say crap, future-son-in-law."
"That's mean, mommy-in-law!"
"Ok! That's creepy James, stop flirting with Mandy!"
"Shut it you!"
"I think my future-son-in-law is very cute and I really don't see why Lily doesn't date him."
"Excuse me while I hurl Manda."
"You're just jealous of my good looking, good looks Rose!"
"Now ladies!!!"
"Sorry to correct you Manda, but if James was a girl, he would most definitely not be a lady. Furthermore, god I sound like some kind of speech person, anyway he's an It, but he's mot even an It-l mean so there really is no point in addressing him. In fact when he was born, James's parents flipped a coin to see if he should be raised as a man or a woman. As you can see they chose the male species." [NSR wants to thank the Friends writing crew for that lovely idea].
"You're despicable Rose. I am most defiantly not an It. I am of the Male race—"
"Race?!"
"Yes, race, and I have the good to prove it. In fact there is a very large shipment of the goods...if you know what I mean."
"That is a horrible conversation to be having as kids your age! I can't believe you! And Lily's going to be telling you about how I had no place saying this because of the Xavia- Tale of the Happy Hooker book, but that's not the point and everybody read it! Someone through it out of the bus window! It went around the whole school. It's not like I bought it!!!!"
"Manda, you will regret that little paragraph for the rest of your life probably now."
"Good point James. Mwahahaha!!!"
"Oh shit."
"Amanda Evans! I don't want to hear that kind of language...unless we can swear and talk about profanity too!" they said in unison.
"Damnit! Ok. It's a deal. I hate this whole hold back your language thing anyway."
"Cool!"
"Fuck you James!!!!"
"What was that for?!"
"I Rose Colleen Daniels am merely celebrating my freedom to swear and speak of and or in profanity."
"Oh. Ok. Shit!!!!"
"Bastard!"
"Bitch!"
"Fuck you! Jinx!...Knock on wood! God Damn it! Jinx! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
"Oh lord what have I done? I should never have let them swear."
"Hahahahahaha;" Rose sticks up her middle finger,"Fuck you tiny freak! No one will ever want to fondle your balls!"
"Shut it! You are an embarrassment to humans! Yippy for Gay Marriages!!! Fuck you homophobics!!!!!!!!!!"
"Whoooooooooooooo..............wait! James I thought that you had a problem with gays."
"No I'm just not one."
"Oh...ok. whooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! Bitches unite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Oh shit. What have I done?"
Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooooooooo!
They can swear openly. Be warned, if one day you can't find this, check out the R rated section!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love you! Review!!!!! NatsterSugerRush! Fuck you...j/k