Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, but it sure would be bondiggity if I did.

Chance Furlong was walking down the street when all of a sudden a magical portal to Mobius opened up and out fell Sonic. Chance called out to him, "Hey buddy! Can you hear me now?" but Sonic was too busy trying to run and chew gum at the same time. Things got very sticky.

Meowth was arguing with Jessie and James about why they couldn't capture Pikachu. James suggested getting a subscription to Nintendo Power, but Jessie felt that would upset The Powers That Be. James didn't care because nobody worried about The Powers That Be, unless they were muggle-born, and James had played enough Quidditch in his lifetime to know he was as much a wizard as the next guy. Meowth just shook his head, and informed James that he was not the person he thought he was, because the person he thought he was had already died. Jessie got mad and hit Meowth with a hammer. Meowth decided it was because Aunt Flo was visiting, because that always made Jessie and the other Pink Ladies cranky. James agreed, but not before competing in a drag race against the Fonz. Fonzie lost because he hit a chicken stand when he was trying to jump garbage cans. It was his own fault really; he'd have seen it coming if only he'd bothered to look at the script. Never follow advice from the Animaniacs.

Scott Summers was tired of everything. He'd spent six months trying to get laid but to no avail. 'No wonder they call Emma Frost an Ice Queen' he thought darkly. Oh how he wished he'd kept the bulletproof aeroplane; it would come in handy when Jules Verne asked him to go around the world in 80 days. Or was he supposed to Journey to the Center of the Earth? He never could remember, ever since he saw Draco's crystalline pewter orbs, everything else had become a blur. If life is an addiction, he must be in rehab.

Inuyasha stared down Sesshoumaru (or Sesshi, as he liked to be called) and paused to do the Macarena with Marty McFly. Suddenly he realized he was not in Kansas anymore and all the pixie dust in the world couldn't bring Old Yeller back. "Don't worry about it!" laughed Hamtaro. "You'll have a tiki-tiki day if you open up your heart, sing a happy friendship song, and COME WITH ME TO THE DARK SIDE."

"Never!" yelled Serena. "My Moon Tiara Crystal Heart Hot Steaming Sex Boogie will have you hypnotized by poor dubbing!"

And with that, the light that tripped fantastic shined so brightly that even Aquaman was burned, despite being immune to all forms of heat. This is what you get when the Mole Men hold a summit with the Last of The Mohicans, an eviction notice for the entire cast of Friends. If only they had someplace to go, where everybody knew their names, but alas! the glamour is gone and Paris Is Only A Lonely Town. Paris Hilton wasn't lonely, she'd hooked up with Legolas AND Zapf Brannigan and was having a dilly of a time Hitchhiking Across the Galaxy (towel not included). All they needed now was permission from the Super Saiyans, but they were too busy competing in the Jellyfishing tournament. Not knowing where else to go, they turned to the next best person- Papa Smurf.

Now Papa Smurf is something else. He has connections you know- going as far back as Alf (on his mother's side) and Punky Brewster (no one is quite sure how that one came about, but we DO know that a jar of mayonnaise was involved). Papa Smurf is never in a good mood when Yugi Mutou is in town: they have been fighting over the kingdom of Narnia for years (apparently the treaty was violated years ago when a Neopet and Scarlet O'Hara eloped). The only way to solve this problem is by playing Battledore and Shuttlecock, so you can see why this has been going on for quite a while.

Thus, the Grand Councilwoman turned her attention to Charlie Brown. He wasn't much help, but she liked the shape of his head, and Helga agreed, so in the end that was all that really mattered. "AUGH!"

"Permission to come aboard, Charlie Brown." the request came from Nigel Uno, a well-known activist for PFLAG and strong supporter of the marriages between fantastical creatures and Southern Belles (also known as Uni-Tara-Ins). Nigel was willing to do anything to prevent Papa Smurf and the other communists from having their way, even if it meant giving the Doomsday Device to Snagglepuss.

"Permission granted" Charlie Brown foolishly agreed (as I said before, he wasn't much help, but then again the cute ones seldom are). Nigel smirked as Captain Nemo activated the tractor beam to take him inside the HispaƱola. It was all so easy. Perhaps TOO easy...

Author's Note: Oh no, it's a cliffhanger! What will happen next? Stay tuned for the next chapter, in which Nigel gets a glimpse of the Powers That Be, Kagome has a chance to taste the forbidden Gum-Gum fruit, and Professor Lupin meets his future husband! All that and more I promise!