This is Hyperpersonwhohasnofuture's form of the theme song-

Camera cuts to Roy sitting at the couch. Theme music starts to play. Mario walks in.

Mario- Today is that day! The day where I get Peach!

Roy- Shut up dumbass! Now is not the time! Can't you plainly see? I'm trying to throw a dime!

Marth- Why you pelt me with coins I do not know! But the least you could do is get rid of the crow!

Camera goes to Crow

Link- (stabs crow from behind) Gotta love Crow on a sword!

Young Link- Maybe they should give you an award!

Red Young Link- Why we are here, we have no clue!

Blue Young Link- But I know I could eat all this freakin' glue!

Purple Young Link- You guys are stupid, not even close to smart!

Zelda- but you have to admit! You taste pretty freakin' tart!

Shiek- I don't even know why I have a part.

Fox- My parents died, how I do not know

Falco- we don't even care, just kill that damn crow

Yoshi- NO, spare its life you must!

Bowser- I like to kill, it's definitely lust!

Kirby- I'm a ball of puff, it really sucks

Pikachu- Look at all these freakin' ducks!

Pichu- I hate Pikachu, I really do.

Mewtwo- but your stuck with him, unitl you do the dew.

Dr. Mario- Advertising soda? Now that's just wrong

Peach- and so is the fact that I'm wearing a thong!

Ness- yes, that is bad!

Ganondorf- No, it's really Rad!

Caption Falcon- I would hate to see Peach lying in bed.

Ice climbers- We feel like we are dead! (anvil falls on them)

Mr. Game & Watch- Damn that was fun!

Luigi- Now it's time for a really bad pun!

Jigglypuff- I'm jiggly!

Samus- That just sucked. I don't even get the point of this!

Killer- who cares? The point is I really need to piss!

All- Welcome one and all to that happy go lucky place! The Smash Mansion! Where the crazy things happen!

Roy- Like I get wasted!

Ness-And I'm attracted to him!

Zelda- I'm the drunkard of this show! And nobody else will stop me yo?

All- So come on in! have the time of your life! Just watch us struggle to live freakin' life!

Killer- and to have many cases of copyright infringement.

Camera fades out

This is Pirategoddess's form of the theme song-

Welcome to the Smash Mansion, it's an insane place to be!
And you know that eventually they'll all try to kill me.
They'll say, "LET'S KILL THE AUTHOR! GET THE BROOM!"
But I could always write them falling into a hellish doom.
The Smash Mansion! Where Roy is always high on stuff,
Ness is gay, and everyone is always trying to kill Jigglypuff!
Zelda's the drunkard, and the Ice Climbers feel dead!
A place where fights get started no matter what is said!
The Smash Mansion, why the Hell do we have to live here?
But they're adventures will always be weird, they'll fall in fear!
MUHAHAHAHAHAHA! Watch them all deal with that strife,
Hell, let's watch them all struggle with their everyday life!

As you can see, hers is shorter and mine is longer. Hers is more to the point and mine just uses all the characters. So, with this said, ENJOY THE EPISODES!