Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or anything else. I do NOT own the great man known as Bob Holdscamp ether...
Who's Kagome 'wait, who made her boss?' is it anyway?
Starring:Kagome
Kikyo on drums
"Say, who made her boss anyway?" Kikyo asked Miroku quickly.
"I don't know, but at this point, I wouldn't argue. We all know how she is when she's angry." Miroku whispered.
" IS SOMEBODY WHISPERING ABOUT ME!!!!!!!" Kagome looked around with a death glare, which caused everybody to cringe in fear.
" Of course not Kagome! I do not understand why you would suspect such a thing from this man of the cloth." Miroku smirked, sliding just a little to close and...
CRACK " Stupid pervert! I warned you! I just KNOW that people were talking about me now!" Kagome yelled, raising her hand to hit the perverted monk again.
Miroku shuffled away quickly to hide behind Sango, "I mean it Kagome! We are but not humble monks, Demon slayers, ect., who only wish to spread love and joy to the world! What good would that do for us if we were to make you displeased?" Miroku said, raising his hands in front of him in self defense, only earning him another growl from Kagome, and a slight blush from Sango for being at such close proximity with the lecher.
" I really like that lady, I think she should be our host." Kohaku chimed to his sister, just before catching a certain monk's hand from touching his sister's posterior. " Watch it monk! I still don't see what my sister sees in you..." Kohaku frowned at the thought of his sister spending her life with such a lecherous jerk.
" What! MONK!!!Did he say you were trying to touch ANOTHER woman?Hiarakkatsu!" She shouted, slamming the oversized boomerang upon the monk's head.
" Ow...Sango, you can't prove anything! Your brother's tricking you, I swear! It would be foolish for a monk to lie, and condemn himself to be reincarnated as a lower life-form. I didn't do it! I'm not but a humble monk, sworn to hold up the way of the cloth." Miroku begged.
" Sure! Right! NOT!" Sango shouted, chasing him through the stands, creating a large ruccess amongst the human viewers, and initiating a riot, turning monk on zombie-shard-puppet-brother, miko on demon-exterminator, stocker on crowd, etc.
" WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY SHOW!!! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS MONK!!!!" Kagome shouted threw the sounds of mayham and mutilation, causing a certain not so holy monk to cring in fear, a moment of silence to reign, and even a spell bound Inuyasha's ear to twitch.
Kohaku sat indifferently beside Kagome, not really thinking about the 'war' until, "Kohaku. Kill Kagome. Kill her!" Kohaku's eyes went dark, and he pulled forth his chain and scythe. "What a shame, that your all out of arrows." Kohaku stated stoically, causing Kagome to notice him.
" Kohaku what are you...?" She had no time to finish her sentence before he threw the blade at her, but she managed to trip over the desk and fell out of the way. " Wait, I get it! Naraku must be controlling your mind!" She exclaimed as she dodged behind Goshinboku, avoiding the scythe.
" Yes, and you just happen to be all out of arrows..." He smirked slightly at the helpless miko, then threw his scythe again, landing just beneath Inuyasha's arm.
" Wait, who said I'm out of arrows?" Kagome smiled, then brought her bow up to fire an arrow, effectively sticking the boy to the opposite wall, and putting him in a sleep spell. " Cut to a DARN! Not the other word, COMMERCIAL!!
COMMERCIAL:
"HI, I'm Bob Holdscamp! I know you all came for the Inuyasha show, but I'm here for Bendies. Have you ever gotten the craving for something meaty, and juicy in the night? Have nothing in the fridge to eat? Come on down to Wendies and try our new Chicken-Steak Burger, a food people will KILL over." He held up the sandwich, then pointed to Sesshomaru, Kouga, and and Inuyasha fighting over one.
" This Sesshomaru will exept no arguments from the fools in front of me."
"Oh ya Mutt-face Sr., I'd like to see you try!" Kouga growled at Sesshomaru.
" I refuse to lose!" Inuyasha growled. They all began a slight rumble, and one miss-aimed punch from Sesshomaru missed Kouga and knocked Inuyasha out of the group. "Must...save...bur...ger....AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!" Inuyasha began to transform despite the Tetsusaiga.
" Kouga, did we just make a mistake?" Sesshomaru asked in a emotionless tone.
" Keh, I ain't sure Mutt-face Sr., but something don't seem right." Kouga growled, then they both turned to see Inuyasha, eyes red, the marks of his youkai heritage on his cheeks.
" Kou....ga...Sess...ho...maru...STEAKKKKKKK!!!!" Inuyasha rushed forth, claws beared, fangs stuck forth, and began an assault upon them, even as the camera came back to Bob's face.
" So you see, try the new Steak-sandwich. It's the food people will simply KILL for." Bob smiled happily at the screen.
End Commercial
Elsewhere...three miles from the studio
Naraku sat bowing in front of Sesshomaru. " Please let me help you! It's always been my life's dream! You know, except for the serving you part!" Naraku begged pathetically.
"Enough. I will accept you as a partner, and we will split everything down the middle, 75/25, if that. Now pick yourself up, you pathetic peace of trash. Jaken, I present you with a new servant." Sesshomaru said nonchalantly, letting a VERY small smile pull at his face, before returning to his stoic expression.
" Thank you, Milord! I am in your debt for such a wonderful gift!" Jaken grinned widely, bowing and kissing Sesshomaru's feet happily.
" Lord Sesshomaru, thank you for sparing my life, and making me your servant."Naraku groveled.
Sesshomaru merely glared down at him, "This Sesshomaru has two feet, and it seems that Jaken is only occupying one. Wait, Jaken is touching me! Stop him, stop him!" Sesshomaru kicked Jaken away, then turned back to Naraku. "You should therefore get working on my feet Naraku, they are still dirty, unless you want I should take back our deal..." Sesshomaru frowned at him.
" Oh! Of course lord Sesshomaru, ruler of the Western Lands, and greatest demon in all the lands!" Naraku worshipped, kissing his feet as he said this.
Sesshomaru merely looked off toward the horizon...and their next destination. 'this will be a long night...'
Back At The Studio
"NOW THAT THAT"S SETTLED!!!" Kagome screamed at the cast, crew, and crowd; all of them tied and gagged. Suddenly the wiggling form of Miroku got close enough, and groped Sango. "HAY! NO FOWL PLAYING ON AIR PERVERT!!! RAAAHHH!!!!" She roared, smacking the monk over the head and making him unconcious.
Sango managed to worm her way near Miroku, " mushi-sama....mu-houshi!!!" Sango tried to say his name to him threw her gag.
" QUIET WENCH!!! This is an ALL AGE GROUP SHOW!!!! That means NONE of his fowl play! Stupid monk deserved it anyway!!!" Kagome yelled, tossing Sango to the other side of the room.
Suddenly the far wall blew asunder, revealing an all to meanacing Dog-youkai, and a very evil hanyou, stopping Sango in her outburst to save Miroku. " You, pathetic miko, where is my brother, the OTHER pathetic half-breed?" Sesshomaru asked boredly, sparing a quick glance at Naraku.
" Uh....the...there..." Kagome said, pointing to Goshinboku, and Inuyasha's sleeping form.
" Hm...It would seem he is indisposed...perfect, then you shall rejoice to know that I'm taking over this talk show, and slaughtering all the humans that remain on this premices." Sesshomaru glared at the group of tied humans on the floor, and before he could blink they were all gone.
" You can't do this! I refuse!" Kagome shouted, earning her a single amused glare before Sesshomaru grabbed her by the back of her shirt and drug her to the door, her flailing the entire way, not unlike Shippo when Inuyasha carries him by the tail.
" Leave my studio Miko, and never return, lest I slay you, which wouldn't bode well for you..." Sesshomaru smiled evilly at her, causing her to shiver.
" Yes master, sorry sir, didn't mean it, your greatness, I'll do anything you want, just don't kill me!" Kagome begged, then ran for her life.
" Now it is all mine." Sesshomaru looked around the gleaming studio.
" Don't you mean ours..." Naraku questioned.
Sesshomaru merely raised an amused eyebrow, " Ah yes...about our deal..."
END CHAPTER-any ideas would be helpful...or you can sit back and enjoy!!