Really lame random disclaimer skit thingy:
Urby: Hey Seldom.
Seldom: (is looking at her almighty frying pan of doom) Would it be more effective as a weapon, or as a cooking utensil?
Urby: Seldom? Can I ask you a question?
Seldom: Okay.
Urby: How come people like yaoi and yuri but don't support gay marriage?
Seldom: Well, yaoi and yuri usually have really hot anime chicks/guys, while normal, boring looking gay and lesbian people try and get married.
Urby: Oh, I get it…so if like, celebrities tried to do that, it would all be okay?
Seldom: Yeah. Some do, but the really popular ones don't, so it isn't, apparently.
Urby: Or do they.
Seldom: Do they?
Urby: I dunno.
Seldom: Are you insinuating something?
Urby: I dunno...or do I?
Seldom: Stop quoting Fairly Odd Parents and write the disclaimer. (hits Urby with a frying pan)
Urby: Oook! Fine.
There once was a girl who played video games.
There were very many she thought that were lame.
But when she picked up TOS she
Said so sadly,
"I wish I owned Namco, but I don't. Shame!"
Seldom: That was good. I won't hit you, this time.
Urby: Yey!
Seldom: But I will chase you! Brahaha! (chases) Write durn you!
Urby: Waiiiii! Oh, any underlined text indicates dreams. Oooh, dreamy.
Seldom: Johnny Depp is sooo dreamy!
Urby: Shut up.
Seldom: I will now impersonate you.
Urby: Oh dear. I was asking for it.
Seldom: Cloud is sooo dreamy! (flutters her eyes)
Urby: ...! HE'S MINE! MINE! RAAAAGH, DOOD!
All the other Cloud fangirls: (mob Seldom) Ours, too!
Seldom: Nuuuu! Not again!
Urby: And before my fans mob me, I will now write the story.
AquaSynn: You have fans? Never knew that.
Urby: Shut up else I will drain your aquarium.
Lloyd looked at the ceiling for the umpteenth time. Can't sleep…memorized all the dots on the ceiling…what to do now?
He exited his room in the Flanoir inn. Genis' light is still on…maybe he can't sleep either.
He opened it to see him on the floor, reading a book. "Hey Genis…do you want to walk outside or something? I can't sleep."
"Right, Lloyd…I'd love to start off my stay with a little hypothermia," the half-elf retorted. "besides, I have to read this book for Raine."
Lloyd looked over his shoulder. "What is it anyway?"
Genis clapped it shut. "A book on spells in elvish! Like yesterday!" Lloyd took it from his grasp, despite his protests. It really is in elvish...darn! Lloyd grumbled and walked outside. Sheena was having a snowball fight with some of the local children (Zelos was watching from a corner, throwing a well-placed snowball every now and then) Presea and Regal were probably talking about some random thing in the past, and Raine and Colette were both being cared for by that greedy doctor.
Hey wait...what's that...
Lloyd walked over to it. It's a dog...and it's been slashed apart. Gruesome...wait...didn't Colette name this dog? Poochi or something? She'll be heartbroken.
A small shape moved under it. Lloyd lifted the body, and found a puppy, trying to warm itself next to its dead mother.
"That won't work anymore," he said softly, picking it up. "I'll see if we can get you something to eat." The puppy whined and chewed on a button on Lloyd's suit. "Hey! No touchie! My buttons!"
Lloyd entered Colette's room. She was sitting up in her bed, looking up at the ceiling.
"Hey..." Lloyd began.
"Oh! Lloyd! I didn't notice you come in," she stammered. "what's that in your hand?" Lloyd presented the puppy to her.
"Oh! It's so cute!" she took it gently and looked at it, checking for any problems. "she doesn't look like she's been weaned yet...where's her mother?" Lloyd hung his head. Colette gasped.
"No..." "I brung it back because I thought we could do something..."
"Lloyd! It's brought! Not brung! Use correct grammar! If the Professor was awake now, she'd give you a beating!" Lloyd noticed Raine for the first time, lying in a bed next to Colette. She shifted, muttering and reaching for something.
"She's been like that for a while...but I can't sleep...the medication the doctor gave me is keeping me awake."
Lloyd looked at the puppy in her hand. "What can we do for it?"
The puppy nibbled on her finger. "She's hungry...but she can't eat solid food yet. She needs milk."
In a corner something twitched. Lloyd inched closer, examining it.
"Mewl!" The object, a fish-shaped pot, materialized into a little child with a kittenish smile and a small tail. Her ears were shaped like those of a Katz.
"Mew! I'm Byruu, the half-Katz! I heard someone mention milk, mew."
Lloyd looked at Colette, who shrugged. "We need milk for this puppy."
Byruu thought for a minute. "That'll be 4000 gald, mew."
Lloyd dug in his pocket. "Darn Katz with their expensive services..."
Byruu growled and dug her claws into his leg. "I can make it more costly, you know! Mewl!"
Lloyd shrieked and shook her off. "Okay, okay! Here!"
Byruu handled the gald with care. After pocketing it, she pulled out a fancy-looking bottle of milk. "Give it to the puppy, mew. Farewell!" She spun and vanished, à la Wonder Chef.
There was silence (unless you count Raine's snoring and shifting) for a while.
The puppy whined.
"So, what are we gonna call it?"
"I think this one's a Mitsmuzz! Her tail is so cute!"
"Colette, you always think their tails are so cute."
"But they are! It wags and it's just so adorable!" Colette yawned. "I'm finally getting tired."
"It is really late. I think I'll turn in. Good night!"
Colette rubbed her head. I feel odd.
"Oh, hey! You're late," Genis said, pulling on her sleeve. "the marriage is getting started!" "Who...what...huh?" Colette allowed herself to be picked up and carried by him, which was surprising, considering the half-elf's strength.
Byruu was standing at the altar, with...Lloyd...and Sheena...
Genis dropped Colette, who stood in disbelief. No...this can't be happening...
"Do you, Lloyd, accept Sheena to be your lawfully wedded wife...aw, heck. We wouldn't be here if you'd just say no anyways, right? Right! Mew! Just kiss the bride already and have fun," Byruu sighed, throwing the bible behind her, grumbling about how she wasn't getting paid enough and 'the food better be good'.
Colette covered her eyes. I can't look!
"What are you doing, just standing there? You have to get ready, mew." Byruu meowed, prying her hands away from her face. "you're getting married next!"
"Really? To whom...?" she managed.
"Why, to me, of course," Zelos said from behind her. "have you forgotten?"
Colette gasped and ran away. It's just a dream, just a dream...how did Raine say to wake up from nightmares again? Immerse yourself in water or something?
"Hunnie? Where are you going?" Zelos cried out.
Byruu appeared before Colette, stopping her. "Here you go, mew." She offered her a basin of milk. "Go dunk yourself." "Thank you so much," Colette said breathlessly, splashing herself.
Colette awoke with on the floor, Mitsmuzz licking her face. That...was scary. Too scary.
Raine picked her up. "Bad dream?"
"Terrible," she said, shivering. "I was going to get married to Zelos."
Raine gasped. "You poor thing! Are you sure you're not eating anything weird before you go to bed?"
"I'm not sure...aren't dreams messages from your unconscious mind or something?"
"No one really knows. But I do know I once had a dream about drowning and never really liked water since."
Colette picked up Mitsmuzz and sighed. Maybe I should be nicer to Zelos?
"What's that?" Raine asked, looking at Mitsmuzz.
"Lloyd found her yesterday. Her mother is dead." Raine sighed and had nothing to say.
"Can we keep her?" Colette pleaded.
"Well..." Colette and Mitsmuzz gave her the puppy eyes. (well, it's kinda easy to do the puppy eyes when you are one)
"Oh, alright." There was a frantic knock at the door.
"Come in," Raine answered. "it's open."
Presea entered hesitantly. "Professor...it's Genis...he's gone!" Raine froze.
"He's WHAT?"
Genis coughed himself awake. Where am I? I feel like I've been flattened by a tree again.
He shook some snow off him. I must be somewhere near Flanoir. It's cold...
Wait, snow isn't supposed to be red. And my arm stings.
He took a look at his arm, which had the monster's telltale gash on it.
Oh, woe...
And to make his day even worse, a snowstorm started.
Lovely. Just lovely.
He wandered aimlessly, lost and alone, calling out every few steps. Soon, he gave up and lay down, begging the snow to swallow him up...
"What's this?"
"Ohmigosh, Hammer, it's a human child!"
"Not...a human," Genis groaned.
"Tacks! He's dying! We have to help him! Kid, can you walk?"
"Hammer! Of course he can't! Okay, you pick up the arms, I'll take the legs. Ready? Up!" Genis felt himself be lifted. Great, now they're going to plop me in a pot and boil me. Actually, that doesn't sound so bad after freezing...Oh, woe times I forget.
And then, the merciful darkness came...
"Presea! Come inside! You'll get buried in the snow!" Colette cried, shivering.
"No. I will stay until Genis returns," she growled, standing near the entrance to the inn like a sentinel. Her determined face seemed to challenge the snowstorm to do its worst.
Colette draped a quilt over her. "Well, if you get hungry, just yell or something."
Presea wrapped it around herself. "Thank you."
Where are you? Come back...please...don't leave me alone again...
Genis awoke next to a fire.
Oh! I so called it! I'm going to be boiled. They're cooking the broth already. Ayee, it smells delicious. If I somehow manage to live, I'm going to ask for the recipe.
"Hey, Tacks. Mmmm, what is it?"
"Uh...fish...fish...more fish...fish again...and eggs. It's about ready. Hammer, please stir it while I wake the little one."
Something poked him. Genis groaned and rolled over.
"Are you hungry?"
Genis' rumbling stomach answered for him.
"Okay. Don't use your arm-we just changed the bandage. I'll get you some food." Genis sat up, looking around. It was a homely cave of some sort, with the smell of saltwater. A blue Penguinist was stirring a bubbling pot where all the yummy smells where coming from, a purple Penguinist was pouring some of the said broth into a small fish-shaped bowl, and Genis' clothes were hanging on a clothesline.
"Are those my clothes?" he asked, pointing.
"Oh, those? We hung them up to dry. They were wet and having wet clothes on a human during cold weather can be very dangerous, and it's cold all the time here."
If those are my clothes up there...then...
"What am I wearing?" he blurted, looking at himself in a pool of water. He was wearing a seemingly patchworked Penguinist suit in all sorts of colors, complete with gloves, hood, boots, and a cute little tail.
"I made a suit for you to keep you warm," the purple one said. "we asked a few friends to chip in some quills. I hope you like it."
This looks like it would take a few days to make. I must have been out of it for a while.
"Oh yes, and before we forget," the blue one chimed, "I'm Hammer. This is Tacks," he pointed to the purple one, who handed him a bowl of the fish broth.
"Genis," Genis slurped.
"That suit does look good on you," Hammer remarked. "you ever considered being a full-time Penguinist? You can live with us." Genis looked at the suit. It was very well made, nice and warm.
"I'm sorry...but I have to find my friends."
Hammer and Tacks looked at each other. "Companions? Please, do tell us about them. We haven't heard a good yarn in a while." Genis looked at the two Penguinists, who really looked like a pair of penguins, sit down in front of him and look at him with an eagerness small children show when they expect a story from a visiting grandparent.
"Well...first, there's Lloyd..."
Urby: Hey Seldom.
Seldom: (is looking at her almighty frying pan of doom) Would it be more effective as a weapon, or as a cooking utensil?
Urby: Seldom? Can I ask you a question?
Seldom: Okay.
Urby: How come people like yaoi and yuri but don't support gay marriage?
Seldom: Well, yaoi and yuri usually have really hot anime chicks/guys, while normal, boring looking gay and lesbian people try and get married.
Urby: Oh, I get it…so if like, celebrities tried to do that, it would all be okay?
Seldom: Yeah. Some do, but the really popular ones don't, so it isn't, apparently.
Urby: Or do they.
Seldom: Do they?
Urby: I dunno.
Seldom: Are you insinuating something?
Urby: I dunno...or do I?
Seldom: Stop quoting Fairly Odd Parents and write the disclaimer. (hits Urby with a frying pan)
Urby: Oook! Fine.
There once was a girl who played video games.
There were very many she thought that were lame.
But when she picked up TOS she
Said so sadly,
"I wish I owned Namco, but I don't. Shame!"
Seldom: That was good. I won't hit you, this time.
Urby: Yey!
Seldom: But I will chase you! Brahaha! (chases) Write durn you!
Urby: Waiiiii! Oh, any underlined text indicates dreams. Oooh, dreamy.
Seldom: Johnny Depp is sooo dreamy!
Urby: Shut up.
Seldom: I will now impersonate you.
Urby: Oh dear. I was asking for it.
Seldom: Cloud is sooo dreamy! (flutters her eyes)
Urby: ...! HE'S MINE! MINE! RAAAAGH, DOOD!
All the other Cloud fangirls: (mob Seldom) Ours, too!
Seldom: Nuuuu! Not again!
Urby: And before my fans mob me, I will now write the story.
AquaSynn: You have fans? Never knew that.
Urby: Shut up else I will drain your aquarium.
Lloyd looked at the ceiling for the umpteenth time. Can't sleep…memorized all the dots on the ceiling…what to do now?
He exited his room in the Flanoir inn. Genis' light is still on…maybe he can't sleep either.
He opened it to see him on the floor, reading a book. "Hey Genis…do you want to walk outside or something? I can't sleep."
"Right, Lloyd…I'd love to start off my stay with a little hypothermia," the half-elf retorted. "besides, I have to read this book for Raine."
Lloyd looked over his shoulder. "What is it anyway?"
Genis clapped it shut. "A book on spells in elvish! Like yesterday!" Lloyd took it from his grasp, despite his protests. It really is in elvish...darn! Lloyd grumbled and walked outside. Sheena was having a snowball fight with some of the local children (Zelos was watching from a corner, throwing a well-placed snowball every now and then) Presea and Regal were probably talking about some random thing in the past, and Raine and Colette were both being cared for by that greedy doctor.
Hey wait...what's that...
Lloyd walked over to it. It's a dog...and it's been slashed apart. Gruesome...wait...didn't Colette name this dog? Poochi or something? She'll be heartbroken.
A small shape moved under it. Lloyd lifted the body, and found a puppy, trying to warm itself next to its dead mother.
"That won't work anymore," he said softly, picking it up. "I'll see if we can get you something to eat." The puppy whined and chewed on a button on Lloyd's suit. "Hey! No touchie! My buttons!"
Lloyd entered Colette's room. She was sitting up in her bed, looking up at the ceiling.
"Hey..." Lloyd began.
"Oh! Lloyd! I didn't notice you come in," she stammered. "what's that in your hand?" Lloyd presented the puppy to her.
"Oh! It's so cute!" she took it gently and looked at it, checking for any problems. "she doesn't look like she's been weaned yet...where's her mother?" Lloyd hung his head. Colette gasped.
"No..." "I brung it back because I thought we could do something..."
"Lloyd! It's brought! Not brung! Use correct grammar! If the Professor was awake now, she'd give you a beating!" Lloyd noticed Raine for the first time, lying in a bed next to Colette. She shifted, muttering and reaching for something.
"She's been like that for a while...but I can't sleep...the medication the doctor gave me is keeping me awake."
Lloyd looked at the puppy in her hand. "What can we do for it?"
The puppy nibbled on her finger. "She's hungry...but she can't eat solid food yet. She needs milk."
In a corner something twitched. Lloyd inched closer, examining it.
"Mewl!" The object, a fish-shaped pot, materialized into a little child with a kittenish smile and a small tail. Her ears were shaped like those of a Katz.
"Mew! I'm Byruu, the half-Katz! I heard someone mention milk, mew."
Lloyd looked at Colette, who shrugged. "We need milk for this puppy."
Byruu thought for a minute. "That'll be 4000 gald, mew."
Lloyd dug in his pocket. "Darn Katz with their expensive services..."
Byruu growled and dug her claws into his leg. "I can make it more costly, you know! Mewl!"
Lloyd shrieked and shook her off. "Okay, okay! Here!"
Byruu handled the gald with care. After pocketing it, she pulled out a fancy-looking bottle of milk. "Give it to the puppy, mew. Farewell!" She spun and vanished, à la Wonder Chef.
There was silence (unless you count Raine's snoring and shifting) for a while.
The puppy whined.
"So, what are we gonna call it?"
"I think this one's a Mitsmuzz! Her tail is so cute!"
"Colette, you always think their tails are so cute."
"But they are! It wags and it's just so adorable!" Colette yawned. "I'm finally getting tired."
"It is really late. I think I'll turn in. Good night!"
Colette rubbed her head. I feel odd.
"Oh, hey! You're late," Genis said, pulling on her sleeve. "the marriage is getting started!" "Who...what...huh?" Colette allowed herself to be picked up and carried by him, which was surprising, considering the half-elf's strength.
Byruu was standing at the altar, with...Lloyd...and Sheena...
Genis dropped Colette, who stood in disbelief. No...this can't be happening...
"Do you, Lloyd, accept Sheena to be your lawfully wedded wife...aw, heck. We wouldn't be here if you'd just say no anyways, right? Right! Mew! Just kiss the bride already and have fun," Byruu sighed, throwing the bible behind her, grumbling about how she wasn't getting paid enough and 'the food better be good'.
Colette covered her eyes. I can't look!
"What are you doing, just standing there? You have to get ready, mew." Byruu meowed, prying her hands away from her face. "you're getting married next!"
"Really? To whom...?" she managed.
"Why, to me, of course," Zelos said from behind her. "have you forgotten?"
Colette gasped and ran away. It's just a dream, just a dream...how did Raine say to wake up from nightmares again? Immerse yourself in water or something?
"Hunnie? Where are you going?" Zelos cried out.
Byruu appeared before Colette, stopping her. "Here you go, mew." She offered her a basin of milk. "Go dunk yourself." "Thank you so much," Colette said breathlessly, splashing herself.
Colette awoke with on the floor, Mitsmuzz licking her face. That...was scary. Too scary.
Raine picked her up. "Bad dream?"
"Terrible," she said, shivering. "I was going to get married to Zelos."
Raine gasped. "You poor thing! Are you sure you're not eating anything weird before you go to bed?"
"I'm not sure...aren't dreams messages from your unconscious mind or something?"
"No one really knows. But I do know I once had a dream about drowning and never really liked water since."
Colette picked up Mitsmuzz and sighed. Maybe I should be nicer to Zelos?
"What's that?" Raine asked, looking at Mitsmuzz.
"Lloyd found her yesterday. Her mother is dead." Raine sighed and had nothing to say.
"Can we keep her?" Colette pleaded.
"Well..." Colette and Mitsmuzz gave her the puppy eyes. (well, it's kinda easy to do the puppy eyes when you are one)
"Oh, alright." There was a frantic knock at the door.
"Come in," Raine answered. "it's open."
Presea entered hesitantly. "Professor...it's Genis...he's gone!" Raine froze.
"He's WHAT?"
Genis coughed himself awake. Where am I? I feel like I've been flattened by a tree again.
He shook some snow off him. I must be somewhere near Flanoir. It's cold...
Wait, snow isn't supposed to be red. And my arm stings.
He took a look at his arm, which had the monster's telltale gash on it.
Oh, woe...
And to make his day even worse, a snowstorm started.
Lovely. Just lovely.
He wandered aimlessly, lost and alone, calling out every few steps. Soon, he gave up and lay down, begging the snow to swallow him up...
"What's this?"
"Ohmigosh, Hammer, it's a human child!"
"Not...a human," Genis groaned.
"Tacks! He's dying! We have to help him! Kid, can you walk?"
"Hammer! Of course he can't! Okay, you pick up the arms, I'll take the legs. Ready? Up!" Genis felt himself be lifted. Great, now they're going to plop me in a pot and boil me. Actually, that doesn't sound so bad after freezing...Oh, woe times I forget.
And then, the merciful darkness came...
"Presea! Come inside! You'll get buried in the snow!" Colette cried, shivering.
"No. I will stay until Genis returns," she growled, standing near the entrance to the inn like a sentinel. Her determined face seemed to challenge the snowstorm to do its worst.
Colette draped a quilt over her. "Well, if you get hungry, just yell or something."
Presea wrapped it around herself. "Thank you."
Where are you? Come back...please...don't leave me alone again...
Genis awoke next to a fire.
Oh! I so called it! I'm going to be boiled. They're cooking the broth already. Ayee, it smells delicious. If I somehow manage to live, I'm going to ask for the recipe.
"Hey, Tacks. Mmmm, what is it?"
"Uh...fish...fish...more fish...fish again...and eggs. It's about ready. Hammer, please stir it while I wake the little one."
Something poked him. Genis groaned and rolled over.
"Are you hungry?"
Genis' rumbling stomach answered for him.
"Okay. Don't use your arm-we just changed the bandage. I'll get you some food." Genis sat up, looking around. It was a homely cave of some sort, with the smell of saltwater. A blue Penguinist was stirring a bubbling pot where all the yummy smells where coming from, a purple Penguinist was pouring some of the said broth into a small fish-shaped bowl, and Genis' clothes were hanging on a clothesline.
"Are those my clothes?" he asked, pointing.
"Oh, those? We hung them up to dry. They were wet and having wet clothes on a human during cold weather can be very dangerous, and it's cold all the time here."
If those are my clothes up there...then...
"What am I wearing?" he blurted, looking at himself in a pool of water. He was wearing a seemingly patchworked Penguinist suit in all sorts of colors, complete with gloves, hood, boots, and a cute little tail.
"I made a suit for you to keep you warm," the purple one said. "we asked a few friends to chip in some quills. I hope you like it."
This looks like it would take a few days to make. I must have been out of it for a while.
"Oh yes, and before we forget," the blue one chimed, "I'm Hammer. This is Tacks," he pointed to the purple one, who handed him a bowl of the fish broth.
"Genis," Genis slurped.
"That suit does look good on you," Hammer remarked. "you ever considered being a full-time Penguinist? You can live with us." Genis looked at the suit. It was very well made, nice and warm.
"I'm sorry...but I have to find my friends."
Hammer and Tacks looked at each other. "Companions? Please, do tell us about them. We haven't heard a good yarn in a while." Genis looked at the two Penguinists, who really looked like a pair of penguins, sit down in front of him and look at him with an eagerness small children show when they expect a story from a visiting grandparent.
"Well...first, there's Lloyd..."