Time Explains Us by Erykah Miszti

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Chapter Eleven: Make or Break

The nebulous masses of energy paid the piper to start to tune.

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Mortimer led Buffy confidently into the maze and Buffy thought how lucky it was that he was with her because the twists and turns of the bushy hedges had her thoroughly confused already. After only a few minutes they emerged into the centre.

William was seated on a stone bench in the centre of clearing with his young sister cradled against his chest. She had obviously been crying but seemed to have stopped now. William was looking down at her with so much emotion on his face that Buffy's heart bled for him. She knew what it was to lose a parent, losing both together in such a horrible fashion was too awful for her to even imagine.

As Buffy and Mortimer approached William looked up and his emotions vanished behind a set mask. He spoke softly to his sister and she left the protective circle of his arms and looked at Buffy. She stood up, pasted on a brave smile and held out her hand to Buffy.

"Miss Buffy, my brother has been telling me about you. Thank you for saving his life. I shall be eternally in your debt."

Buffy smiled warmly at the young girl.

"Anyone would have done the same but it's a pleasure to meet you." She looked over at William. "We're leaving now." She informed him.

"We only just arrived." He pointed out wryly.

"This location isn't as safe as we'd hoped." Mortimer told him.

"Do you have some transportation arranged for us, because the carriage I hired will have left by now?"

Mortimer smiled knowingly.

"I have it all arranged."

He withdrew a bottle and what appeared to be an amulet – a piece of heavy gold jewellery with diamonds embedded into it - from his pocket.

"What are they, Uncle Morty?" Summer enquired curiously.

"Something very special." He replied. "Now you mustn't be afraid, my dear. This is going to seem very strange."

"Is it magic?" She asked with an excited tremor in her voice. "Like in your stories?"

"Yes it is." He told her with the gravitas of a stage magician.

Buffy saw William roll his eyes and she smiled. He may have come to believe in vampires but magic was obviously a harder sell. She watched Mortimer curiously. Surely he wasn't thinking of a teleportation spell…

Mortimer beckoned them all closer to him and made them take hold of the amulet between them. William did so reluctantly. Mortimer then opened up the bottle and a pungent smell of mint filled the clearing. He shook the contents of the bottle over the amulet and then all of them too, covering them with tiny flecks of gold. He muttered under his breath in a language Buffy didn't understand.

"For goodness sake!" William exclaimed impatiently.

But suddenly the clearing and the maze disappeared and they were standing inside a circle of candles within a dark room lined with books.

"Powerful." The gypsy said, impressed.

"What?" Travers demanded, putting down his book and giving her his full attention.

"Magic." She replied. "They're gone."

"Did you let down the barrier?"

"I didn't need to."

There was a thump to Buffy's right and she turned to see William land heavily on his ass. Summer laughed.

"That was wonderful, Uncle!" She said brightly.

"Are you alright?" Mortimer asked Buffy.

"I'm fine." She replied and then tried to move and staggered instead. "Well, mostly." She smiled wryly.

"Things went badly then." A female voice inquired and everyone turned to look at the beautiful dark haired woman standing in the doorway.

"Sadly, yes." Mortimer told her as he stepped out of the circle and went towards her. "Everyone, this is Lorraine Whittington, a good friend of mine and the finest witch on the blessed Earth."

He smiled at her fondly.

"Not the finest." She said depreciatingly as she smiled just as fondly back at him. Buffy could easily pick up on the subtext flowing between the two of them. They weren't just friends.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all." Lorraine said sweetly. "I wish it had been in better circumstances."

"You fixed this spell?" Buffy asked her.

"Yes." She replied. "It was something I learnt from a Shaman in Africa a few years ago."

"It was impressive. I have a friend back home who's been trying teleportation but it takes a lot out of her."

"The secret is in the purity of the gold and in finding perfect harmony with the Earth. I've been experimenting with using the spell to move trans-dimensionally but I just can't get that quite right. I can take or send you anywhere on Earth but no where beyond."

Buffy's eyes brightened hopefully but Lorraine sighed.

"I'm sorry Miss Summers; I haven't been able to make it work through time either. That is just another dimension which also seems closed to me. I'm very sorry but I can't use it to send you home."

"That's okay." Buffy lied and squashed down the hopes that had been raised inside her. "And it's just Buffy."

Lorraine nodded an acknowledgement.

"I'm sure you're all very tired and hungry. I've had rooms prepared for you and dinner will be at seven."

"Um," William began; he was now back on his feet again. "Where are we?"

Mortimer laughed.

"This is Lorraine's home. It was left to her by her poor husband who died many years ago. He was a Laird, don't you know, we're in Scotland." He told him.

"Scotland?!!!" William exclaimed. "But..?"

"Come my boy," Mortimer cut in. "I'll show you to your room and explain on the way."

Mortimer led a protesting William out of the room.

"Explain to me too!" Summer exclaimed and ran after them.

"Where is Scotland?" Buffy asked Lorraine conspiratorially. "Is that still in England?"

Lorraine laughed.

"Not quite." She replied ruefully and explained it to her.

Buffy was happy to find fresh clothes laid out for her in her room. They were even the right size, it must have been down to the witch thing, she thought wryly.

She ignored them for the moment though and lay down on the bed to try and get a little sleep. It wouldn't come.

The room itself was beautiful. A giant dark wood four poster bed dominated it but didn't dwarf it at all. The ceiling was 15ft above her head and the floor was flag stones covered with rich deep rugs.

The place they'd been magically transported to turned out to be a castle perched on a rock overlooking the sea on one side and mountains on the other. It was a virtual fortress. For the first time in days Buffy felt safe from Angelus.

She'd been trying not to think about what would happen next but alone in her room she couldn't help but wonder. Angelus wouldn't just stop looking for them. He never stopped. His obsession would only grow. Could they live here in this castle forever? Would they even be safe here?

Then there was the Watchers Council. What would they do now that she had defied them? She'd never really thought about them in Sunnydale apart from finding them irritating whenever they came calling. Back then she hadn't pictured them as a powerful, worldwide force. They'd seemed so ineffectual. She'd imagined them all to be like Wesley, a bit pathetic and out of touch. Having seen their "retreat" and that energy barrier she realized that she couldn't underestimate them.

They claimed to have the power to send her home. Could they be bargained with? No, they wanted her to give up William. She wasn't prepared to compromise on that.

What about William? She wasn't prepared to give him up to Angelus. William was special; he was pure and innocent. He wasn't a part of this sordid world of vampires and demons. He was normal. However, there was the fact that everyone she met seemed to bring up some kind of prophecy about him. Prophecies could be changed but she really needed to know more about it before she just discounted it.

She needed Giles to research it. No, she just needed Giles full stop. And Willow. And Xander. And Dawn. She had always felt so alone as the Slayer but now she needed her friends and they weren't here and she was lost without them. If she ever did make it home, she promised, she'd cling onto them so tightly and make sure they knew how much she loved them.

Was she ever going to get to go home? Was she ever going to see Spi..?

A knock at the door stopped her train of thought and she was quite thankful for it because she'd been just about to head off into dangerous territory.

"William!" She exclaimed in surprise as she opened the door. So much for not thinking of Spike, she thought ironically.

He looked at her soberly.

"I've come to apologise for my rude behaviour these past few days."

"There's no need. We both.." She began.

"There's every need." He cut her off. "May I come in?"

"Of course." She stood back to let him in and closed the door behind him.

He went straight over to the window and looked out across the view of the mountains beyond. She stayed silent and waited for him to speak. The fading sunlight chased shadows across his cheekbones and turned his hair lighter, almost white, almost…

"Buffy, I feel such a fool. I always knew that I was inexperienced about the world but the world I imagined is nothing like the one I find myself inhabiting now. There's magical transportation and vampires trying to kill me. It's all so very strange."

He paused to draw a deep breath and Buffy waited, letting him work through it for himself. She remembered a scared little girl standing in a cemetery with a stake in her hand having been told that she's the Slayer and must fight evil.

"I know you have secrets. I know that there's still more of this that I don't know. I wish you could tell me. I would love it if you trusted me enough to tell me everything. I hope someday you will. But I do understand that you feel you can't. That's your right. I understand that you feel you're protecting me by shielding me from this. I thank you for that protection. I hope you'll also extend it to my sister because I don't know if I can protect from this horrible world and I hate myself for that." He gave a small sob. "I don't want her to die because I can't protect her."

Buffy felt tears fall down her cheeks. She felt the same way about Dawn. She knew exactly how he felt. She crossed to him and put her arms around him resting her cheek on his back.

"Of course I'll help, William. I'll help you protect your sister, as if she was my sister too."

"Thank you." He replied with feeling.

They stayed that way for a long moment before William turned around. Buffy initially let her arms drop to her sides but then she reached up again to brush the tears off his face in wonder. She'd never imagined this face - his face - with tears on it. The gypsy had told her that Spike cried for her in the future. This face streaked with tears for her was the most beautifully tragic thing she could imagine. Then he reached up to brush her tears away too and their eyes locked. The kiss seemed inevitable.

Their lips had barely touched before Buffy pulled back and turned away to hide her feelings from him.

"I'm sorry. I can't." She told him. "Everything's so messed up right now. It wouldn't be fair to lead you on like this."

There was a long moment of silence behind her.

"I've known how I feel about you since the first moment I saw you." He said softly. "It was as if we were meant to meet, as if time itself had conspired to place us together."

Buffy licked dry lips and tried to speak but couldn't find any words. She had to remind herself that he still thought she was from the Wild West; he didn't know she had travelled in time to get here. It was too weird him saying that. She had to harden her heart, he was just being romantic. Oh god, he was being romantic!

"I know you're trying to get home but… are you sure you couldn't make a new home, here, with me?"

It was suddenly all too much, everything she'd been through in the past few days came spilling out and Buffy burst out in great choking sobs.

"Oh god, I'm sorry." William exclaimed. "I didn't mean to make you cry." He reached out towards her but his hands stopped as if he didn't dare touch her.

"Why is this happening?!" She cried. "I went through so much with Glory and my sister, you'd think I get a break but instead I'm trapped a lifetime away from Sunnydale, away from all my friends and… and... I'm facing Angelus again. Angelus! It nearly broke me last time. I loved him and that let him hurt me so much."

William's face fell in horror and Buffy saw it through her tears.

"He wasn't always Angelus." She told him sadly. "He was kind and sweet once and I trusted him to never hurt me, never leave me but he did both, so many times." She scrunched her eyes up. "William, I'll never let him have you. I'll never let him hurt you." Her voice broke on the emotion. "He'll never hurt either of us again."

"Buffy," He said softly and went down on his knees before her. She looked at him in shock. "I love you. Let me look after you. You can protect me, but let me protect you too. This Angelus, let him be in the past for you and build a future with me instead. Let me love you; let me make both of us forget him. If we're happy then he can never hurt us."

He took her hands into his.

"Stay here with me, Buffy. Marry me."

A million "Buts.." flashed through her head. Then she knew, looking down into those beautiful blue eyes, she just knew something she'd been hiding from herself for a very long time. She loved Spike... But she couldn't have Spike because he was a vampire and an evil undead thing who'd hurt her like Angelus did or have to leave her like Angel did. She could see Spike in William just as before she'd glimpsed William inside Spike. This William WAS Spike but without the evil demon bit. And it was in her power to stop those evil bits from ever being there. She could love him without any qualification, as she'd never been able to love anyone before. She could let herself love this man. It was like having Spike but having a normal life all at the same time!

"It's just so sudden. I don't know what to say." She told him, still thinking it over.

In the future they thought she was dead. Maybe she was. Maybe this was heaven and maybe this was her reward for being a hero and saving the world. Maybe she was being given William as a prize. Maybe he was a pure version of Spike and he was her reward.

They could get married. They could have children. They could have grandchildren!

This was why she was here… to save the man she loved and be with him. The future would carry on fine without her and she'd miss her friends but she could build a new life here. Ashe could build a normal life where she didn't need to be the Slayer to the whole world and could just be a woman with a man. She really could. It was only a chance but it was a chance that she couldn't - shouldn't - let slip away from her.

"Just say yes, and make me the happiest man on Earth." He gushed, desperately, romantically.

Buffy grinned and gave in. She threw herself into his arms and let herself go, honestly and completely, for the first time in years.

"Oh Spike! Of course it's yes." She exclaimed and kissed him.

William was so happy and so busy kissing her back that he didn't even realise that she'd called him Spike, not William.