Chapter Two:

Emily yawned and rolled over. She blinked once, and then immediately opened her eyes. She was no longer in her handicapped-bathroom-sized bedroom, instead she found herself waking up in the middle of a deep forest.

"OH MY GOD!" she screamed, "WHERE AM I?"

At her yell, her companions woke up as well, and immediately began screaming, as they did not find themselves in the varied-sized bedrooms. Emily was considerably calmer when she saw her companions were only Rachael, Tamela and Lan.

The screaming eventually stopped, and the girls looked around to start figuring out where they were. But they were slightly distracted when they discovered they were not their normal selves.

"OH MY GOD!" Tama, Lan and Emily screamed.

"I'm a dwarf! Why am I a dwarf?" yelled Tama.

"Um...I think you since you wouldn't cooperate I made you a dwarf?" said Emily, hesitantly.

Tamela glared at her, but then Lan was too busy exclaiming over her cute outfit to pay attention.

"I'm so cute! Look at my pretty long sleeves! And my cool embroidery!"

Rachael, Tama and Lan hide smirks and snickers, as although Lan was clothed beautifully in Rohan clothing, she was still about four foot tall and distinctly Vietnamese.

"Um...I have a question, Emma," said Rachael, hesitantly, "Why do I look like this?"

The girls turned to look at Rachael. Oddly enough, although all the others were clothed in distinctly in Lord of the Ring-like clothing, Rachael was still clad in our-world clothing: jeans, pink T-shirt, and Doc Martins.

"Er, let's see," said Emily, taking out her writing notebook and flipping to where she had made notes about her LOTR fan-fic. "Well, all you specified was 'Gandalf's Lover' so...I guess you can be his lover in any race?"

Rachael considered this for a moment, then shrugged.

"Uh, Emily, you look a LOT different," said Tamela, as they all averted the gaze from the glory streaming off of Emily.

Emily, for the first time, time a close look at her and her ensemble. She was about six feet tall and stunningly gorgeous. Taking out her sword, she found that she was an expert surpassing the skill of even the King of Gondor. She knew that if she needed to perform healing, magic, or feats of horsewomanship, she would be able to do so with little energy exertion. You'd think that upon discovering this, one would be ecstatic. But Emily, as an avid fan-fic reader and writer, knew better.

"Damn," she said.

"What?" asked her friends.

"I'm a Mary-Sue," she explained.

"Uh...so?"

"Well, see, Mary-Sue's are girls who are impossibly good at everything and impossibly gorgeous," said Emily.

"So, that should be a good thing, right?" asked Lan, speaking for the still confused group.

"Yeah, you'd think," said Emily, still annoyed at her discovery, "But everyone hates Mary-Sue's."

"How much?" asked Tamela, suspiciously.

"Uh...enough to kill them on sight," admitted Emily.

The three girls were smart enough to realize that this meant, as the creator of the fan-fic, that if Emily was killed there was no guarantee the rest of them would get home safely...or at all.

"Well, you know what you must do, then," said Lan.

"Yeah, yeah," said Emily annoyed. She thought it over and picked out the abilities she thought would be most helpful on their journey. Within a few moments, she shrank back to her normal short height, large butt and everything. She had kept some skill with a sword and decent horse riding skills, but nothing out of the ordinary.

"OK, so what do we do now?" asked Rachael, once they were all in their forms they planned on keeping for a little while.

"Er..." said Emily, as they looked at her.

"Emz, this is your fan fic!" exclaimed Tamela.

"Yeah, you're supposed to take care of the plot and stuff!" said Rachael.

"I know," said Emily, shifting guiltily, "But I didn't have much time to think about it! You guys think about where you wanna go and what you wanna do, and then we'll figure it out!"

"Ooo!" exclaimed Rachael and Lan, in unison.

"Oh, no," said Emily, having a fairly good idea of what they wanted to do.

"Go to Gondor, see Aragorn, make love!" exclaimed Rachael.

"Mirkwood! Mirkwood! And Legolas!" was all Lan could say.

"Now, you guys," began Emily, "We can't change the Canon."

"The canon?" asked Tamela.

"Yeah, the canon is what we fan-fic people call the original story," explained Emily.

"Uh...so how do you write a fan-fic at all?" asked Tama.

"Well, the idea is to embroider the story, not completely rip it up and sew it back together for something new and different," said Emily.

"That was a horrible allegory," said Lan.

"Shut up," said Emily, "So you understand, we can't make any huge changes."

Rachael, Tama, and Lan had a small conference at this point.

"So, she thinks that the Yayas can go somewhere and not wreck havoc wherever we are?" asked Lan.

"She's stupid," said Tama.

"Well, she thinks she has to follow these rules, blah, blah," said Rachael, rolling her eyes.

"We'll just make her think that she's following the rules," decided Lan, "And then...not."

"Sounds good to me," agreed Rachael and Tama. They turned back to Emily, who had a peculiar look on her face.

"I think my authoress instincts are telling me to take us to Rohan," said Emily.

"Why?" asked the others.

"I dunno," said Emily with a shrug, "It probably has something to do with things that can happen there that will be fun and interesting to read."

"OK, well, do we know how to get there?" asked Tama.

"Not to worry," said Emily, "It's in the bag."

This was not just a clever cliché, it was true: Emily reached in her bag and took out a copy of The Lord of the Rings, flipped to the appendixes where the maps where and proceeded to lead the yayas towards Rohan.

Yeah right....

* * * * * Authoress' Notes: So, are the Yayas gonna make it to Rohan? (Unlikely) And if they do make it in one piece (more unlikely), what are they gonna do? Who knows? Send me a review with ideas and stuff, and I'll love you forever. Big thanks to Kingmaker for reviewing! Go read his stories, they are SO much better than mine! Lots of love, Emily