A/N: evil grin Enjoy folks!

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. Send the lawyers home already!

Warnings: ... smirk

Tess entered the Underground Hideout after a hard day's work slaving away for Krew in the Hip Hog. It was quite late but she had information she thought Torn should know. But when she reached the bottom of the stairs Torn was nowhere in sight. The pretty blonde woman stepped further into the room, looking around to try to find out where the tattooed elf could be.

"Ohh...Torn..."

Tess stopped. That sounded like Jak. Not that he ever spoke to her much. The voice had come from a door on the left. Tess approached the door but before she could enter Torn spoke.

"This will only hurt for a moment. Are you ready for this?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," Jak replied.

There was a vague noise and then-

"You'll feel much better in a second..."

"Ah! Aah! Torn!"

"Stop moving around so much! I'll never find the right spot!" Torn snapped.

Tess stood in shock. Were they really doing what it sounded like they were doing?!

"Sorry but it hurts like hell..."

"Well you aren't making this any easier by moving around!"

"Sorry, I can't help it!"

"I'll hold you still. Just let me get right in so I can find it..."

"Ah! Ooh...Torn!"

"Almost there..."

"Aah!" Jak screamed.

"Got it! Doesn't that feel better now?"

"Much. Thanks Torn!"

There was a sound of movement in the room and the door opened. A shirtless, bleeding Jak stepped out.

"Oh, hey Tess," he greeted.

"Wait Jak, you need bandaging!" Torn said behind him. He appeared behind Jak, bandages in one hand, a small clear bag or bloody bullets in the other. "Oh Tess, you're here late."

"Tess!" Daxter appeared, weaving between Torn's legs and avoiding a kick. "The Tattooed Wonder was just getting some bullets outta our boy here."

"Heh...right, well...I gotta go..." Tess said and dashed out of the Hideout.

Jak, Torn and Daxter watched her go.

"What was that about?" Jak asked.

"No idea," Torn said. He put an arm around Jak's waist and kissed him on the cheek. "Well, shall we get you bandaged up now?"

"I can think of other uses for the bandages..." Jak said seductively, ignoring the gagging noises Daxter was making. He pushed Torn back into the room, slamming the door behind them.

A/N: ...So what did YOU think they were doing? Pervs! XPPPP

Leave a review on your way out please!