Disclaimer: I do not, once again, own Harry Potter. If I did, I would put myself in the books and have sex with all the bad guys.
Author's Note: Yes, this chapter is much more tame (?) that the previous three. There are a couple instances. It DOES have a very important line in it though. I didn't write a comedic chapter only for the hell of it. There IS a point.
Oh, and guess what I found out. Serenity IS a real word, right? So, get this Serenity can mean 'quietness'. Cool, huh? I didn't even try to do that. Sorry, just an interesting tidbit.
I also have to give credit to I can't remember her name, but she wrote PADFOOT PROHIBITED on I stole a 'prank' from her. I am giving complete credit to her, however, so please don't get pissed. If you like humor, you should all check out her story. I'm not a huge fan of humor, but she kicks ass.
CHAPTER FOUR: EVANS FOR HOLIDAY
It was two weeks later on an evening when Remus, James, and the two Blacks were sitting up at midnight laughing at one of James' jokes, that Professor McGonagall made a rare appearance in Gryffindor tower. "I thought I might catch you lot up." she said. "Miss Evans seems to keep complaining about it." The four could have sworn they saw a flicker of a smile on her face. "Mr. and Miss Black, you will be under the care of Mr. and Mrs. Potter. They will be signing documents tomorrow and will act as your legal guardians until you are of age. You two will come to my office tomorrow an eleven a.m. sharp. Now, go to bed." She left as suddenly as she came, but none of the four moved to get up.
James, who was grinning more that the others--barely--gave Sirius a high five. "You know what this means, don't you? We're going to be brothers."
"Oh, gods." Remus said, rolling his eyes heavenward. Serenity giggled at him, but the other two weren't paying an attention. Remus grinned at her and their eyes met and held for a moment. When they looked away, Serenity had the oddest feeling she had just missed something very important.
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The four signed up for the holidays at Hogwarts when the paper came around. Only one other person from Gryffindor had signed up.
"Hey, Evans." James said to the redhead before Charms.
She turned to look at him, annoyed. "What?"
"You're staying at Hogwarts for the hols."
"I know that." Lily said.
"Yeah, well, so are we." James said smoothly.
"Point?"
"You need to work on your social skills, Evans." James teased. "You're acting like you don't like me."
The corners of Lily's mouth twitched, but she managed to keep herself from smiling. "Beg your pardon." Lily said sarcastically. "I would be much obliged if you could find it in your heart to get to the point."
Sirius grinned and covered his mouth with his hand before James saw him. Remus turned a laugh into a cough. Serenity made no attempt to disguise the fact that she was grinning from ear to ear. 'Oooohhh.'
James glared at them. "You guys suck." Then he turned to Lily. "My point is that I think we should call a sort of . . . truce . . . over the hols. You know, McGonagall would probably get pissed with we killed each other."
"Truce meaning?"
"We act civilized, Evans. You can practice your social skills." James said.
"I can hardly wait." Lily said as Professor Flitwick called the class to order.
"So, is that a yes?" James whispered.
Lily gave a curt nod before she began to take notes.
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Sirius and Serenity had their first confrontation with Bellatrix since the day the girl had dragged Serenity into the bathroom. "Aunt Catherine blasted you two off the family tree." she said in Potions, a nasty smile playing on her face as she looked at Serenity.
"Good." Sirius said. "Now I won't feel bad about hexing you if you don't leave Serenity the hell alone."
Bellatrix spun around, her dark eyes flashing as Professor Curtaine called the class to order. Serenity was staring determinedly at her book, pretending to read it. Remus reach over and pun in 180 degrees, so that Serenity wasn't 'reading' it upside down. She smiled at him gratefully. He smiled back.
"Your potions have had the chance to mature for three days. Carry on." Professor Curtaine said. The instructions were on the board again.
It seemed Serenity and Sirius would be able to ignore their cousin until Bellatrix, who was making her potion with Severus, slowly picked up a knife. Serenity had looked up at exactly the wrong time. Bellatrix slid the wrong side of the knife down Severus' arm and smirked at Serenity.
Serenity's eyes went wide and she backed up, her hands in front of her. Remus abandoned their potion and grabbed his best friend by the shoulders. "What's wrong?" he asked in a low voice. By now, James and Sirius had hurried over to Remus and Serenity.
"What is it?" Sirius asked, pulling out his wand. He glanced at Bellatrix who was talking in a low voice to Severus as she added salamander blood to their potion.
Serenity shook her head.
"Is there a problem here?" Professor Curtaine asked, coming into view behind Remus, who immediately released Serenity.
Sirius' sister rubbed frantically at her eyes. "No, Professor." James said. "Serenity just got some olive juice in her eye."
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"Walk with Serenity to the Great Hall, okay?" Sirius asked James as he put some of their potion in a flask. "I'll catch up."
The bell rang and James muttered Sirius' message to Remus. They lead Serenity quickly of the dungeons. James had a feeling Sirius was going to do something she would be better of not seeing.
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"You'd better leave her alone, Bella." Sirius snarled, his wand pointed at her. "She's got enough to worry bout without you being a bitch." He had her cornered in the abandoned corridor outside the Great Hall.
Bellatrix examined her fingernails as if she felt she were in no immediate danger. "You're just sore because Serenity won't tell you what happened." she said calmly.
Sirius inched closer to her. "And I supposed you're going to tell me."
"'Course not." Bellatrix said smoothly, now playing with her hair. "Now, Sirius, I am hungry, so if you're little game is over--"
"It is not a game and it's not over." he snapped. "You leave Serenity alone, got it?"
"Oh, but it's so much fun." Bellatrix said smiling.
"I won't hesitate to jinx you." Sirius said maliciously, his blue eyes dark and clouded.
"I won't hesitate to scream for McGonagall." she retorted.
"Silencing Charm." Sirius warned. "Now be a good girl and swear you'll leave Serenity alone."
Sirius heard a sound and jerked his head around. No one was there. Too late, he realized the sound was from the next floor up. When he turned back to Bellatrix, she was gone.
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The holidays seemed to arrive in a heartbeat. One minute the four of them were getting detention for attempting to steal fairies from the Christmas tree and hold them for ransom--a detention all but Remus earned, he simply got dragged in--and the next they had Gryffindor tower to themselves.
Almost
Lily spent the first few days of free time in the same way she usually did, curled up at the fire with a book.
Wurthering Heights, Serenity explained, was a book that was to 'lovey-dovey' to get through. A Tale of Two Cities was too dry and boring. ("Who cares about a stupid French-Muggle war that happened ages ago?" Sirius translated.)
"Well, what would you suggest I do?" Lily shrieked, snapping her book shut. "Run around the castle screaming?"
Serenity made motions that seemed to last too long for the short translation. "Hang out." Sirius said.
"With you?" Lily looked as if she had bitten into a lemon.
"We don't bite." James said grinning.
"Hard." Sirius added with a laugh. "We did call a truce, Evans."
"Yes, to be civilized, not to become best friends." She moved to open her book again.
"The civilized thing to do when someone says 'hang out' is to hang out." James said, still smiling at the redhead.
"I've seen what you four call 'hanging out' and it's anything but civilized." Lily's expression had softened, however.
"Come on, Evans. How bad could it be?" James asked. Before she could crack the obvious joke, he continued. "What, are you afraid of fun or something?"
"No." Lily said. Now she was smiling.
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"I hate flying." Lily protested weakly. Sirius was trying to shove one of the school's spare broomsticks in her arms. He had already handed one to Andromeda.
"Come on, Evans." James said. "I promise to catch you if you fall." the Gryffindor Seeker said.
"And that's supposed to make me feel better?" Lily retorted, but she took the broom from Sirius. "So, what exactly is the point of this?"
"Girls versus boys." Sirius said. "We make a wager and the team that loses has to do it. Nudity is out, since half of us are related."
James clapped his hands together. "So, what'll it be?" he asked Sirius and Remus. The girls we grouped together and Andromeda was interpreting Serenity's odd form of sign language almost as well as Sirius could.
When both teams had agreed on wagers and written them on pieces of parchment to be revealed after the game, James explained the rules. "We're only playing with the Quaffle. First team to ten wins or until the hour mark, whichever comes first. Girls get possession first."
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Andromeda, Lily, and Serenity had behind a curtain outside McGonagall's office, trying not to laugh as Sirius, Remus, and James shot them very dirty looks. Then, James took a deep breath and knocked on Professor McGonagall's office door.
Without so much as a warning, James plunged into a story, his eyes wide. "P-Professor, they're out to get us!" he cried.
Her eyes narrowed. "Who is--"
Sirius looked around. "They're hiding under the beds!" he shrieked. "They won't go away!"
It was Remus that did the best though, much to everyone's shock--including McGonagall's. "They keep making these noises, Professor. And I think I saw one sticking it's hand out from under my bed. It almost got James!" He ducked behind James as though in fear of his life. "Please, Professor. You've got to get rid of them. If we fall asleep, they'll strangle us!"
Lily could swear she saw Professor McGonagall trying not to smile. "What?"
"The evil clowns!" all three boys yelled at once. When Professor McGonagall pointed them away from her office, Sirius actually forced tears into his eyes.
"You've got to believe us, Professor! It's not a joke! They're really under there. They're trying to kill us. Can't we just sleep in the girls' dorms?"
James grabbed Sirius' arm. "Nobody believes us." he wailed. "I'm writing home to tell my mother!"
Once again, Remus outdid the pair of them. "That's why we took the fairies, Professor! It's the only thing that will make them leave us alone! That's why we stay up late every night, so they won't eat us! Only now, Lily keeps saying she'll report us."
"There are no evil clowns living under your beds." Professor McGonagall said, struggling to keep a smile off her face.
"That's what Petey said!" Sirius cried.
"Who on earth--"
"Of course you don't know who he is!" James cried. "We found a note from him in our wardrobe. He went to school here ages ago. The evil clowns got him!"
"There are no evil clowns living under your beds." Professor McGonagall repeated.
There was a loud noise then, from just up the stairs. All three boys hid behind Professor McGonagall like she was a human shield.
Lily, Serenity, and Andromeda exchanged looks. Lily was biting her bottom lip and Andromeda was biting her knuckles. Serenity was much more adept at silent laughter, however. The girls continued to watch the scene.
"Now, boys," Professor McGonagall said, turning around, "you have really outdone yourselves." A thin smile formed on her lips. "however, if you still insist there are evil clowns lurking under your beds, you may go speak to Professor Dumbledore."
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"Did you see the look on her face?' Lily asked, erupting into giggles. It was hard to believe that two days ago this girl wanted to spend the holidays curled up with a Charles Dickens novel. "That was priceless."
Serenity was giggling silently as she tapped Sirius and the shoulder and made some motions. "Yeah, you're right." Then he turned to Remus. "you should take an acting class, mate. I though McGonagall was going to have a cow when you started talking."
"Yeah." James interrupted. "Who would have thought old Remus had it in him to lie to McGonagall?" Serenity giggled again. Once more, her and Remus' locked eyes for a moment.
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Serenity and Lily were holding hands and jumping up and down on the couch while James, Sirius, and Remus tried to build a house of cards with an Exploding Snap deck. 'I'm bored.' Serenity mouthed as she and Lily flopped down on the couch, breathless.
"Find something to do then." Sirius said without looking up. The deck exploded.
James dropped the rest of the deck. "Yeah, I'm bored, too. Let's find something to do."
"Like what?" Remus asked, putting the cards back in their box.
"Sneak into the kitchen and bribe the house elves." James suggested.
"Go tell Dumbledore about the evil clowns." said Sirius.
"Torture Mrs. Norris!"
"Torture Filch!"
Remus sighed, Serenity giggled, and Lily's eyes widened. Remus sighed because he knew whatever they did would most likely result in detention. Serenity giggled because she was a twelve year old girl who attracted trouble. Lily had never had detention in her life and was a complete teacher's pet.
"Torture the giant squid!" Sirius cried.
"Torture Moaning Myrtle!"
"Can't." Remus interjected, grinning in spite of himself. "Myrtle's in love with Sirius. She'd be impossible to torture with him around."
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It was eventually decided that painting the school pink was the best solution, suggested sarcastically by Remus. Armed with wands, they ran past the doors of the Great Hall, their first target. Within the time of forty-five the Great Hall, three lavatories, the Transfiguration department, the Potions and Charms rooms, and the gargoyle outside Professor Dumbledore's office were pink.
It was Professor Dumbledore who caught them. With the familiar twinkle in his eyes, he asked the question. "Why did you decide to paint the castle pink?"
James answered with a grin. "Pink just seemed more cheery. Blue seemed depressing." He tried to look innocent, as if painting the castle were the most natural thing on the earth. However, James, Sirius and Serenity never looked innocent. Remus typically looked innocent all the time, because usually was innocent. Lily, on the other hand, looked terrified.
Dumbledore nodded at the five of them. "Of course, of course. However, I must be the bearer of unfortunate news. The castle cannot stay pink." He swept away, amusement still showing on his face.
James looked at Lily, whose face was now regaining same color. "Chill out, Evans. If there's one teacher who won't get us in trouble, it's Dumbledore."
"I've never been in trouble before." Lily breathed.
Sirius grinned broadly. "My gods, Lily. How have your parents been raising you?"
Lily flushed. "I want to be a prefect. And people don't take you seriously if you break rules. No one ever believes you're sincere." She spoke in a voice that admitted she was saying this out loud for the first time, after think about it for time on end.
"That's not true." Sirius said, frowning. "You can be sincere and break rules. You just have to know when to do which." He was using the serious air he didn't typically exercise with James and Remus.
They all headed back to the common room in silence, contemplating what Sirius had said and the true, hidden meaning behind his words.
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"No one would believe you anyway. You make up too many stories." Sirius' father said, walking toward the door.
"Yes, they would. People don't just make up shit like this." the nine-year-old boy said, trying to forget the pain was plaguing him. His mind drifted to Serenity, her silence. "If you ever touch her again, I'll tell, you bastard."
"Watch your language. And if you tell I will kill your sister. And you'll watch." His father's hand was on the doorknob. "Now, get dressed and come downstairs. Supper's almost ready."
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The holidays seemed to pass quickly. After their final supper without the rest of thee students in the no-longer-pink Great Hall, the five trudged up to the common room. "So, this is it." James said to Lily. "Tomorrow you go back to hating us."
"I never hated you." Lily said, checking her watch. 10:28. "I envied you. Jealously can be misleading."
"Why would you envy us?" Sirius asked. "You're the smartest girl in school, you never get in trouble."
"And everyone hates me." Lily said simply.
"We don't hate you." James said. "We just think you're annoying. That, and you're so uptight."
Lily looked at him. "You're right. I am uptight. And I need to go to bed. Thanks." She started up the stairs.
"For what?" Remus asked.
On the last step, Lily turned and looked the four of them. "For helping me paint the school pink."
Somebody save my life
I'd rather be anything by ordinary please.
-Avril Lavigne, 'Anything but Ordinary'
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So, what did you guys think? I know it was a much tamer chapter. Hope you liked it. Next chapter starts everything. It contains . . . drumroll please . . . SLASH!!!
Yay! So, if you guys don't like slash, you're SOL, because slash is a very big thing in the next 7 chapters.
Here's a preview of CHAPTER FIVE: GUARDIAN ANGEL:
It was Sirius, Serenity's rock, that began to crack. It was on one of the nights when Remus' "mother was sick". Sirius had been listening to the words fag, queer, and gaywad all day. he had been inches from tears since supper.
As he and James had been changing for bed, the tears finally fell. There were no sobs, no sound. One minute James was looking at Sirius trying to smile, the next his face was cloaked in tears. And that wasn't even the biggest surprise of the night.
When James came over to comfort the boy who still had words like 'gay' and 'faggot' in his mind, Sirius kissed him. That wasn't what shocked James. What startled James--pretty damn near scared him too--was that he unhesitantly responded to the kiss.
AND LATER . . .
"Hey!" someone yelled. No one knew who. "Look, it's Potter and Black. Great fag couple, huh?"