Disclaimer: How many times do I have to tell you I don't own Harry Potter? Unfortunately. Man, I want Lucius right now. Can't explain it. I know he's a bastard, but he's a HOT bastard. You all agree with me, right?

Author's Note: Short chapter. Important chapter. Slash chapter. Yay!

CHAPTER FIVE: GUARDIAN ANGEL

It was clear from the time they were at lunch the next day that things would never be the same. Whispers had followed Serenity all day. ("Poor thing." "No wonder she won't talk.") Not so quiet comments had followed Sirius. ("Faggot." "You didn't strike me as the queer type, Black.")

Sirius finally told Remus and James the whole truth. "My dad fucked us." he said, so softly they almost missed it. Remus and James exchange a meaningful look. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Sirius demanded. "Look, it doesn't make me gay. I'm not going to--"

"No, Sirius. That's not it." James said hastily. "We know you're not gay, or anything, no that it would matter."

"I'm not." Sirius said shortly. "But what was that look about?"

"We kind of . . . already knew." Remus said. "You scream things in your sleep, Sirius." REmus looked at James. Their eyes were dark.

"What kind of things?" Sirius asked not quite sure if he wanted to know.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

James and Remus sat bolt upright in bed as they heard the screams. Without a word they both vaulted over to Sirius' bed. James wrenched open the curtains.

Sirius was screaming and crying, but he was still sleeping. "No! Don't, Daddy! God, Daddy, don't! Please?" He was twisting around in his sheets, thrashing. "I won't tell, I promise! Just don't touch me! Oh, God! Daddy, don't!" Then the screams dissolved and Sirius was still except for the sobs.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"Things . . . about your . . . dad." James said slowly and softly. "We didn't know what to do. You've been doing it since our first week here."

"I'm sorry," Remus said, "about what your dad did."

"Me, too." James hastened to add.

"I don't need your pity." Sirius said heatedly. "I don't want it either. So you can just shut up about it."

"Look." James said sternly, a very odd trait in a twelve-year-old. "Your dad raped you. Both of you." he added, looking at Serenity. "That's not right and it never will be. So, I damn well get to say I'm sorry it happened. Call it pity or sympathy or whatever the hell you want. I say we're friends and I actually do give a damn about you, so I am sorry it happened."

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"Hey, queerness rubs off, Potter. I'd get away from that fag if I was you." It was a Ravenclaw fourth year who said it. Within seconds, that particular fourth year was bloody and limping to the hospital wing.

"You shouldn't have done that." Sirius said. "Maybe you guys should just . . . back off. That way people won't think--"

"Don't be stupid!" Remus snapped in a very out of character voice. "People are just idiots. If you really think that we're just going to . . . fly off or whatever, you're wrong."

"Yeah, mate." James said quietly. "We don't care what they say. They're just stupid. Now, c'mon or we'll be late for Charms."

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Serenity wasn't getting the evil comments that Sirius was. People seemed to think that the fact that since she was a girl and he, a boy, that there was a difference in their situation.

She also knew exactly who had let the story 'slip': Bellatrix. She saw it in the way Bellatrix shot nasty smiles at her and Sirius. She knew that another ordeal with the threat of the switchblade would be happening soon.

She wanted to tell her brother. Sirius had always protected her, or else tried his hardest. Now it was Serenity's turn. She was not going to give Lucius any reason to hurt Sirius. Sirius had been trough enough. If anyone found out she was raped again, she would be pitied. Sirius would be called a 'faggot'.

James seemed to be looking out for Sirius, while Remus had assigned himself to protect Serenity. So when Bellatrix took her first verbal stab at Serenity it was Remus, not Sirius, who took charge. (Sirius and James had been in the bathroom.)

"Any gifts from Daddy lately, Serenity?" Bellatrix hissed.

Remus had his wand out within seconds. "Not another words." he said, clearly and firmly. He looked angry and, as Remus rarely got angry, his anger seemed more dangerous that Sirius' would have been.

Bellatrix eyes his wand warily. "You wouldn't hex a girl." she said. "Gryffindor honor and all that."

"You don't count as a girl." Remus snapped. "Not another word to Serenity."

Bellatrix almost smiled. "Oooh. It's always the quiet ones." She pause. "What if I say a couple of words to my darling cousin?"

"I won't warn you again." he said. His voice was calm, but his eyes were furious.

Bellatrix eyed his wand one more time before turning to Serenity. "You know--"

"Impedimenta!" Once Bellatrix was twitch on the ground, fighting invisible ropes, Remus swept his arm around Serenity's shoulders and lead her quickly to class.

She pulled him into the corner before they go to the History of Magic corridor. 'Thank you.' she mouth desperately. She grasped his hands in hers. Tears were standing in her eyes.

"Hey." Remus said softly. "Calm down. There's nothing to cry about."

'Thank you.' Serenity mouthed again.

"There's nothing to thank me for." Remus said. Serenity threw her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. "Serenity, why . . ."

'Thank you.'

Then, suddenly Remus understood. If he, the most timid of their friends, the least likely to hex someone, would stand up to Bellatrix, then not all hope was lost. She knew there were good people who would always be there.

And that was why Serenity could live through another day.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

It was Sirius, Serenity's rock, that began to crack. It was on one of the nights when Remus' "mother was sick". Sirius had been listening to the words fag, queer, and gaywad all day. he had been inches from tears since supper.

As he and James had been changing for bed, the tears finally fell. There were no sobs, no sound. One minute James was looking at Sirius trying to smile, the next his face was cloaked in tears. And that wasn't even the biggest surprise of the night.

When James came over to comfort the boy who still had words like 'gay' and 'faggot' in his mind, Sirius kissed him. That wasn't what shocked James. What startled James--pretty damn near scared him too--was that he unhesitantly responded to the kiss.

This was nothing like the awkward kissed with girls he wasn't majorly 'in to'. This was a pure, unadulterated kiss. James actually felt disappointment when Sirius pulled away.

"I'm sorry." he breathed. His amethyst eyes were still filled with tears. "I didn't mean to." Then, the first sob left his body. "I am a fag."

James almost slapped him. "Stop it!" he yelled. "For starters, even if you are gay, which I doubt , if you call yourself a fag or queer or whatever, I will deck you. Secondly, you were really upset and that was probably all that kiss was. And thirdly . . ." James' voice trailed off. And thirdly, I liked it? Am I gay?

"I liked it." Sirius croaked through his sobs. "So I am a fag." He started sobbing harder.

"I liked it, too." James whisoered, dropping to his knees and taking the sobbing heap that was Sirius into his arms. "I like it, too, Sirius. So, what does that make me?"

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

The words 'fag' and 'gay' seemed to hurt Sirius even more afterwards. James practically had to drag his best friend to class. Sirius had lost all will to live. Even Serenity couldn't pull him from his depressed stupor. Sirius' savior was the least likely and yet the most obvious person.

It was the day after Sirius though carving 'fag' into his ankle was a good idea. It was the day after Remus had to physically restrain Sirius while James got rid of the blade.

James had a firm grip on Sirius' arm and wad leading him to Greenhouse #2. Remus had his arm around Serenity's shoulders. "C'mon, Serenity." Remus whispered, more to break the silence than to hurry the girl up.

"Hey!" someone yelled. No one knew who. "Look, it's Potter and Black. Great fag couple, huh?"

In the matter of three seconds the boy was hurtling fifty feet through the air. All eyes turned to the red-headed girl, wand out, livid expression on her face, her emerald eyes hard. No one could remember seeing anyone so angry in their lives.

"There's nothing to look at!" Lily snapped. "And there's nothing to say either. You call can go to hell! Well, what the hell are you waiting for?!" Then she marched over to Sirius and kissed his cheek. "You are the strongest person I have ever met." With that she walked into the Greenhouse.

Sirius didn't hear any of the dreaded words for the rest of the day.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"You got a detention?" They heard Anna, one of Lily's friends, ask her at supper. "You ruined your perfect record?"

Lily looked directly at Sirius. "Sometimes people won't take you seriously unless you break the rules."

Serenity stood up and walked down the hall to Lily. 'Thank you.' she mouthed.

Sirius watched them. Yes, thank you.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

James and Sirius kissed again that night. Serenity almost breathed a single word to the moon. Lily swore. Remus contemplated telling his friends the truth.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Words were thrown, but Lily's anger seemed to have woken a few people up. A timid first year told another rape didn't influence whether you were gay or not. A popular fifth year jinxed one of her male friends for calling Sirius a fag.

And in the shadows the bravest feat occurred. No one saw the revolutionary act. One Slytherin called Bellatrix a bitch. The act was rewarded with several punches and quite a few hexes.

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

The rest of the school year seemed to pass in an instant, except for a few stolen kisses and several stolen pieces of armor. Thus, it was soon time for Sirius and Serenity to move into their new home.

I'm lost as can be

Then you look at

And I'm not lost anymore.

-Celine Dion

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Well, what did you guys think? I know, I know. It was very short. I'm sorry, but I needed a way to get some of the pent-up anger out of my system. I don't know what song those lyrics are from. If you know, e-mail it to me.

The next chapter is going to be awesome. Sirius and Serenity meet the Potters. There is lots of romance, but there is still lots of drama.

P.S. Is it WRONG for me to think Daniel Radcliffe's hot? I know, he's like fourteen and that's only three or four years younger than me, but it is that, like, child pornography or something? E-mail me. Hey, I'm getting a new yahoo account just for readers, so I can talk to them. I'll tell you next chapter.

Here is a sneak peek of CHAPTER SIX: UNREQUESTED DESIRE:

"Don't worry." Sirius whispered, his fingers trailing down James' chest. "I won't give you a hickey." He laughed breathlessly. "I'm not ever sure I could even if I wanted to." he added, trying to make the worry fade from those hazel eyes that gazed at him, trusting him completely.

AND LATER . . .

Remus and Serenity had walked over to the bookshelves when James and Sirius were laughing at Muggle kitchen appliances. When the two boys saw the, Remus was talking softly to Serenity. Then he kissed her. Serenity wrapped her arms around his neck . . .

AND EVEN LATER . . .

Sirius tears continued to flow down his cheeks. I hate this. I hate needing you. I hate you . . .