A/N: Ok, here we are with 'checking back on' requests for Theoden, Denethor and Aragorn, all by request. Yeah! It's a long chappie, it's a make up chapter from all the stuff I missed and that.
Boromir: Aragorn
Frodo Gimli
Gandalf Pippin
Gimli Sam
Legolas Frodo
Merry Merry
Pippin Legolas
Sam Gandalf
Denethor Eowyn
Eomer Denethor
Eowyn Theoden
Theoden Eomer
Gollum Gollum
Chapter Nine: Checking back with Merry, Gandalf, Theoden, and Denethor. And Aragorn is here!!!! And Haldir, too, I suppose, if you really care. And Battle Scenes!
Somewhere in Fangorn Forest..."I'm a little teapot short and stout, here is my handle, here is my spout. When...." Gandalf sings. Can you believe I forgot the words? You can? Good.
"Why must you do things like that, Gandalf, that make it seem imperative that you have the antics and IQ of a simple 3 year old?" Merry sighs.
"Well, Merry, why must you use large words that a person such as I can't comprehend?" Gandalf shoots back.
"Oh, yes? And can you comprehend such a word as, oh, acquitted?" Merry asks.
"Of course! Can you come to grips with gravitational pull?" Gandalf yawns.
"What about facing inertia?" Merry questions.
"And how about being ambidextrous?" Gandalf retorts.
"Do you support antidisestablishmentarianism?" Merry says.
Silence.
"Well, do you?" Merry asks.
"If I knew what you meant, I'd have an answer." Gandalf says.
And so Merry and Gandalf passed the days in Fangorn. But then there was the Entmoot that they had 5 days ago. It went something like this:
"So, wadda you wanna do?"
"Be a peacemaker!"
"Well, can't we go to Helm's Deep or whatever?"
"Stupid hobbit, no!"
"Hey! OK, TREE-DUDE, WE ARE GOING TO HELM'S DEEP AND WE'RE GONNA MAKE A DETOUR AT ISENGARD!! OK? LET'S GO SOUTH!!!" Gandalf screams.
"Fine!" Treebeard and many other Ents say.
That was Entmoot. Yeah...so Merry, Treebeard, and Gandy are goin' to Isengard!!
Meanwhile, with the Rohan people...The Following Scene was Recorded 2 days ago for sake of time and viewing pleasure
Title Card: Pre-pre battle of Helm's Deep, with Eowyn (Denethor), Aragorn (Boromir) and Theoden (Eowyn) and other people who don't really do much but are there anyway. And anything in italics (like so) is script or A/Ns that I put in. So, yeah!
"Ok, so I'm Eowyn and I just found out Aragorn fell off a cliff. YAHOO!!" Denethor screams.
"Er, actually, I'm right here." Boromir says, leaning against the wall and chewing gum.
"My plans never work!!"
"Ok, anyway, say your stinkin' lines!!!" Eowyn yells, tossing a book at Denethor.
"No! Not the script! Not the script according to ADSOL!!!" Denethor cries.
"Fine! But you gotta read it normal! Or something." Eowyn says, musing on her words.
"Ahem. 'Lord Aragorn! I'm to be sent with the women and children into the caves!' Sounds like the Bachelor pad! Sweet! Women and me? DUDE!!" Denethor says.
"'That is an honorable charge.' Why must you think that way??? And anyway, what woman in their right mind is going to...er...well, you're wearing a DRESS!!" Boromir screams.
"'To mind the children and find food and bedding when the other guys arrive! What honor is there in that?' Why do I get the stupid lines? And anyway, you don't know what's under this dress!" Denethor snaps.
"'My lady, there may be a time for valor without renown!' Well, that just sounded perverted and sick and eew!!" Boromir says.
"'You don't command the others to fight! Can't I fight beside you so I can save your life and then we can be king and queen of Gondor?' So? At least I have IT!!" Denethor says.
(a/n: Ok, the following stuff not in italics is really weird, I thank 2 boys in my class for the idea. So if you've got a weak stomach, turn away!!!)
"'As much as I'd love that, which is small, very, very, small, I already have a fiancée named Arwen. Didn't you wonder why I've got a necklace on??' What are you implying, I don't have it?" Boromir questions.
"'Oh. I always thought you were a few grapes shy of a fruit salad, that's why you wear the necklace.' Yes, I am implying you don't have it. You know, it?" Denethor says.
"'How dare you! I am NOT a fruit salad! And besides, I think there's some relatively hot guy named Faramir in Gondor and you'll end up with him.' Oh my GOD!! IT!! You mean childbearing properties (as said by some guy, though not so politely)!!!! YOU BASTARD!!!" Boromir screams, walking off.
"'Fine! Be an idiot! See if I care if you get yourself killed! I won't cry at night about it!!' Well, fine, be that way! And if you think that I'm gonna thing Faramir is hot...forget it! I'm not about to have 2 cases of incest on my part!!" Denethor says, storming off.
"For some odd reason, I don't think that went the way it should..." Eowyn says.
Back to Reality and the Real Time!
"Ok, so we're all here, right?" Boromir asks.
"Check!" Haldir, Pippin, and Frodo say. Other Elves reply in Elvish.
"Ok...have at us, foul villains!!!" Boromir screams, as the battle for Helm's Deep begins.
Meanwhile...
"Hey, mon, check out de party in de islands! Everybody jam!!" Aragorn says, as some dead Elves, dwarves, hobbits, and men are having a beach party in the Islands, complete with beach, volleyball, sand castles, and everything else needed!!
A/N: Ok, next we'll write about Legolas and Gimli and the actual battle. Hooray! Review if you want, it'll make my day.
Ok, this story is winding down, about 5 more chapters, probably, and then we'll get into RotK! I think I'll call it...I have no idea. I have to think up something witty. If you've got an idea, tell me!!! And as a bonus (and because this is too fun) there's gonna be POST-ROTK!!! Like, fourth age stuff with all our pals!! And the next chapter is gonna have a visit with ARWEN and ELROND!!! YAY!!!