Betrayal
Chapter 6: For Better or for Worse
Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, nor any of the characters there within. Though I wish I did.
Pain. It was the first thing he had become aware of as he came to; a pounding, throbbing pain in his head. The thunderous pound of his heart in his head. How did that get there? That was not where a normal heart belonged. The two should be separate—the mind was for thinking, the heart was for feeling. How long had they been lashed together this way? How long had his heart been pressed to the back of his mind as only a distant memory...
What had happened?
What had happened to him?
Robin numbly remembered the ruthless attack of the black-haired Tamaranian girl and swore never to lay a hand on her again.
The pain she had caused him drove stakes through his heart on so many levels, he dared not to count them for fear that she may have already destroyed his inner being. There was too much to think about. It hurt to think.
A soft touch at his temple roused him from his thoughts. Was that his hand? Was those his fingers caressing the pain away; softly smoothing back his matted hair? Was that his palm gingerly taking that beating heart in his mind and placing it back into its home?
Gentle hands. Softer than his.
No, these hands did not belong to him.
Robin cracked open his eyes; the pain it took to motivate this simple action shot more agonizing pain into his skull. It was as though Blackfire were still there to torment him; striking against him another blow to his aching head.
His throat rumbled in a thick dryness as he groaned, forcing his eyes open and to remain open.
A face stared back at him and a terrible shock jolted through him.
Blackfire!
She was still there to torture him, smiling callously as though she read his very thoughts. He could do naught but stare up in horror. A sharp pain in his chest forced him to shut his eyes and when he opened them again, Blackfire had vanished and in her place—Starfire.
The face was sweet, eyes laden with concern. A curtain of beautiful red hair fell forward to brush his cheek.
Robin blinked and the red hair became black; green orbs fermenting to purple malice-filled eyes radiating with fury.
He blinked again and Starfire hovered above him once more.
Blackfire
Starfire
Blackfire
Starfire.
Robin scrambled backward, already storming skull pained once again by the T that stood behind him. He blinked rapidly after the last blow to the head and the Starfire before him remained Starfire. He looked up and Titans Tower stood behind him.
Starfire.
She had come out of the Tower after he had contacted Aqualad and he dully remembered that the door had connected to his head not a moment after.
It took a moment for him to piece everything together.
Had it all been a dream; an imagined work of the mind drawn from his temporary concussion?
Or was he just going crazy?
She came to him then, soft and gentle, concerned for his well being. Just like before. Just like the last time. But this should have been the first, there should not have been a last time. There should not be a Blackfire. There should not be a dagger. There should not be this maddening fear in his breast as he gazed up at the red-haired Tamaranian. Why, why, why?
Robin released a harrowing cry, his sanity falling away as he ran. He ran from her touch, from her caring, from her light. He had run out on all that had ever mattered to him.
He hated himself for it, but he could not help it!
Was this time a reality or was it another dream? Was this to be his reality? This twisted churning, hurtful life was now to be forever his?
Anger rose in him, mounting like a roaring avalanche. The only thing to settle this and gain back some of his fleeing sense of reason was to find it.
He had to find that dagger.
He stopped in the middle of the hallway to the T-sub, hardly recalling how he had made his way to it. He began kicking and punching blindly—some blows connecting with the wall, some wildly flying through the air. He realized he must look crazy to any poor unwary passer-by and his anger rose to a fury. Had the dark-haired Tamaranian been present, he might have torn out her throat even if her retaliation involved his own death.
He had to find the dagger. His proof of sanity relied upon it.
He gave one final loathsome punch to the wall, leaving an ugly crater in its side as he charged down the hall where the T-sub was waiting for him.
It was a mad search; he was mad on all accounts. Crazy and enraged; but he had to know, he had to make certain. He had to know if Blackfire had truly come. He had to know it Starfire was truly in danger. He had to know it all of this was REAL.
He had been searching a long time now, several hours passed though not quickly enough. His eyes dry from the continuous scanning of the ocean bottom and his body weak from the starvation he was forcing upon it. Still the dagger had not been found. He was dehydrated, he was tired and above all, he was furious. This raging fury seemed to be all that kept him going. His thoughts turned later to a fierce compassion to find the weapon. That he must indeed be crazy to search the ocean's floor for a tiny, silver blade. It was probably already covered in sand and it would be impossible to find.
Robin removed his mask to rub his tired eyes as he resignedly detached the headphones from his ears. The poor boy pressed his fists into his eyes; salty tears beginning to prickle the back of his eyes. He should cease this useless endeavor, he knew, but the fear and hatred of returning to the surface empty-handed was more than he could bear.
A soft knocking at the glass roused him from his misery. Aqualad drifted before him, obviously concerned. Robin gazed back, unseeing; too crushed, too drowned in his own world to care.
Aqualad began to make movements—motions of concern for his friend to return home, he could hear the tiny bleep of the ship that warned his oxygen tanks were low. He could see the weariness in their leader which had begun to affect his judgment. He could feel the riled emotions through that very glass of the ship. Worry etched the aqua teens brow as if to say:
Go to your home my friend. This search is madness. Your friends are missing you.
Robin did naught but glare at the Atlantican and tried to maneuver past him, but already the aqua teen had summoned two whales to take Robin to the surface, the same two that had aided the Titans when the T-sub was spiraling to its certain doom during their battles with Triton.
The leader felt at once angry for not being able to continue his search but also a gratified relief that his friend was giving him a well deserved rest. He released the controls and leaned back, quietly listening to the mournful song of the whales. It seemed as though they sympathized with him and Robin was grateful toward the gentle creatures.
The surface was breached and this was where the whales left him.
Robin sighed and took hold of the controls once more. He dove the ship back down to the docking bay below the tower.
Empty-handed.
Of course he was upset, he was simply too exhausted to completely register the fact.
Mask firmly set back in place; Robin trod a steady course to his room. Perhaps after a light doze, he would feel revitalized and go out on the search again. Robin sighed.
He was so tired.
"Hey Robin!"
Beast Boy came trotting up; dumping a load of dirty laundry in the Boy Wonder's confused arms. "Dude, you left your laundry by my door..."
It was true that Beast Boy's door was close to the laundry room (Raven had insister on it) and Robin must have left his clothing there by mistake. He was too fatigued to notice or comprehend the difference between the green teen's room and the laundry room.
"And," Beast Boy continued, "since you'll be doing a wash, would you mind doing mine too?"
More dirty clothes piled high up to Robin's chin, the smell infiltrating his nose. He may have been going crazy, but Beast Boy's dirty laundry was as real as blazes. "Thanks, dude."
The green teen promptly closed the door in Robin's face before the Boy Wonder could say otherwise or hand back the clothing. Robin sighed again, but deemed it as just punishment for the breakfast he had skipped not a week before.
Robin started down the hall to where the laundry room waited at the end of it, until something caught his eye.
His bedroom door was open.
Robin's pace quickened, lengthening to impossible strides, much of the garments in his arms falling away behind him to land dejectedly on the floor. When he reached the front of his room he stopped. All of the clothing in his arms tumbled to the ground as Robin inevitably followed them.
For there, across the room in a pedestal on the shelf, stood the dagger.
A/N: Hooray! Another update. (I am so pleased with myself to finally getting around to this.)
I know this chapter seems a bit choppy and somewhat lacking in detail, but I did it on purpose. Robin is really starting to lose it and I wanted to bring across what that must feel like. Incomplete thoughts; a sort of stream of consciousness. I suppose if everyone is still able to follow along without too much distress, then that's passable. grin
Sorry about the very slight Beast Boy bashing, I really hadn't intended on it. I just wanted some sort of comic relief for poor Robin who I seem to relentlessly strike down. (Just like my evil girl Blackfire!!!)
The next chapter will be fuller. I on fingers there should be around two or three more chapters left to write and again, I have no idea when I will be able to get those posted, so just keep on the look-out.
Anyway, please review!
Blackfire 18